Chapter 25

OK here we go with the last chapter of season three of Our Zombie Girl. I cannot quite believe that we have made it to 25 installments and over 50,000 words. Thank you all so very much for your kind comments over the last few months, it has really inspired me to keep going. Just a reminder (as if you needed it) that these characters are the property of Tony Grounds and the BBC. I have simply manipulated them to my own fiendish and despicable ends.

This fan fiction lark is really addictive but I think i am going to take a bit of a break for now. The SZS may return, but i will need to see how the muses take me (I have more than one). I am really awed by the talent of some of the writers that are on here and may just take a bit of time exploring their stories and leaving comments (which will always be constructive ;-)) Cheerio for now!

"I don't understand, what's happening?" Said Molly

James frowned deeply "This is what they meant by a bigger attack. It's not just this van, it's all the burger vans which are serving food from the same producers. The pathogen is in the supply chain."

"What are we going to do sir?" Asked Kinders

The major looked at two section, Nan and her men, the police and the crowd. They were all looking back, watching, waiting, hoping for an answer. He cast around for a solution. They were so few and the zombies were so many, spreading throughout the city and increasing in numbers as they attacked more victims.

James stared at the football stadium in front of him and then noticed for the first time the outside broadcast lorry parked near the service area. He turned to Molly's dad. "Is the match being televised?"

"Oh yer, it'll be shown live on Sky and then Match of the Day tonight" he confirmed.

James passed his fingers through his hair and twitched his lip. He then rolled his tongue around his mouth several times and folded his arms, thumbs drumming a silent rhythm against his biceps.

Nan leaned over to Molly "What's he doing?"

"He's thinking, shhhh" said Molly

The major suddenly turned to Brains "Private I need you to send all the information we have on PharmaCorp over to Colonel Morley. Ask him to make sure it is passed to the appropriate authorities."

"Sir" replied Brains and doubled away.

He then turned to Kinders "Sargent, I need all the solution and every piece of sound equipment we have transported here as quickly as possible. Nan, can your people lend a hand?"

"Of course dear." She nodded to Harry who signalled to two of his men to follow him and they all climbed into the van with Kinders, Nude Nut and Dangleberries before driving off to the warehouse.

James then turned to the police inspector "Officer, I need you to arrest this man" he indicated the burger van driver who was still being held by two of Nan's men "We have reason to believe he caused the attack here today"

The inspector hesitated but then signalled to one of his men to do as James had asked. He then turned back to James "But what are we going to do about the rest of the zombies?"

James looked at him and smiled "I have an idea but I'm going to need your help"

An hour later James stood in the Bobby Moore Stand and surveyed the scene. Upton Park had been cleared of fans, the match abandoned by order of the police. Two section were now busy rigging up their sound system to the stadium PA whilst Nan's men rolled barrel after barrel of solution along the side of the pitch and into the bowels of the stadium.

At the same time teams of police officers were erecting barriers along the side of the pitch and television technicians where repositioning cameras and running cables. Suddenly a large screen at the opposite end of the ground flickered into life and a huge image of James appeared.

Brains emerged from an entrance below James and started to climb up to him, mobile phone in hand.

"Sir, Colonel Morley for you" he said and passed James the handset.

James took the phone and raised it to his ear "Hello Sir"

"James, we have checked and confirmed your intel and have made contact with the head of the military operation against the zombies" said Morley

"Military operation sir?" said James confused

"Yes, your Prime Minister has declared martial law in London to try and contain and counter the attacks" said Morley

"And are they acting on our information sir?" asked James

Morley grimaced "General Collins indicated he would look at it, nothing more."

"But we don't have time...hang on, did you say General Collins?" Said James. When Morley confirmed James groaned:

"We are totally screwed. General Collins is the one who shut us down. He is never going to believe anything we say"

Morley paused then said "Let me try and contact the relevant minister, see if we can't intervene politically."

"Thank you sir" replied James

Morley then went on "regarding a related matter, those satellite images of the ex MOD camp you requested show clear evidence of activity including the movement of equipment and the deployment and drilling of men in combat like formations. My operatives on the ground have managed to get me close range images which confirm the trainees are...infected" said Morley

"A zombie army" stated James

"Exactly. I have not been able to share this with Collins...satellite surveillance of our close allies never goes down well as you will appreciate..." Admitted Morley uncomfortably

"Indeed. I assume PharmaCorps intention is to present the government with an alternative to the SZS once these series of mock terrorist attacks have been played out?" said James

"That would seem to be the logical conclusion." agreed Morley "The identity of the zombies would need to be kept secret to avoid PharmaCorp being implicated in terrorism but, like many black op. activities, the authorities will prefer not to know anything about the individuals involved."

"That would certainly ensure no awkward questions are asked and secure them a lucrative defence contract which they badly need" said James "Presumably, once the Minister has reviewed the evidence PharmaCorp's roll in this will become clear and the rest of the plot will be revealed"

"We must hope so. Anyway, I will contact the minister and leave you to do whatever it is you are planning. What is that by the way?" Asked Morley curiously.

"Oh, just turn on the nearest television set in a few minutes and you will find out" said James with a smile

"I knew I would regret asking" said Morley and he was gone.

James threw the phone back to Brains and sat down to look at a map of London. Circles had been drawn around the locations of the ongoing attacks, based on the latest media reports. As he was doing this Molly called up from the pitch side "Boss, TV bods want to have a word"

James looked up to see that Molly had been joined by a tall man wearing a headset and a young lady carrying a case.

"Come up" called James and the three of them mounted the steps leading to the row James was sitting in.

"Major, my name is Reese, Alan Reese" said the tall man "and I'm the director of this outside broadcast. I know you have explained your intentions regarding the live piece to camera but we need to talk about style and feel if we can"

"Style and feel?" Said James confused

"Yes, what sort of image are you trying to project, is there a particular mood you want to create, do you have a target audience in mind? It will help us to come up with the right lighting and sound effects and make sure we get the costume and make-up right."

James stared at them and then said "No costume or make up. I am just going to talk as I am to camera. That's it"

The Director grimaced "Major, that's just not going to work, trust me. My understanding is that this is a public appeal. You will need to engage your audience with look and gesture as well as words. Now show me how you are going to deliver to camera"

James huffed and stood up, folding his arms. The director stood back and raised his hand to his chin "No, no that's not going to work, too stern and forbidding. Folded arms also make you look defensive. You need a more open stance."

"How about hands on hips and legs apart, that always looks good" chipped in Molly with a grin

"Yes excellent!" Said Reese "Go on then Major let's see it"

James glared at Molly but reluctantly complied

"Much better" said the director "more relaxed and honest but still authoritative"

"Right" he continued "what next? Gestures...at a critical point in your broadcast I would lean forward, maybe grab the back of the chair in front, make eye contact..."

"What like this...?" And James followed the instructions.

"Thats right!" Cried Reese "Now we need a final flourish at the end. Something that will really grab the attention"

"How about he takes his top off" said Molly "he's got lovely abs"

James looked at Molly testily "Don't you have somewhere else to be Private?"

"No, not really sir" said Molly with a mischievous smile.

"Well let's see it" said the Director and James reluctantly obliged

"Oh my god" said the man whilst he backed away squinting through a rectangle he had formed with the thumb and index fingers of each hand "that's it...we draw out and fade to black..."

James frowned at the man "you really want to get out of football coverage don't you?"

"One day I'll get the call from Downton" said Reese wistfully

"Haven't seen it" said Molly "I'm usually watching the other side"

Reese frowned then turned to the girl with the case who had been waiting patiently through the preceding dialogue "Ok Sindy, makeup and hair...let's comb out those curls a bit, give him a dusting of East End grime and highlight that stubble. Nothing says 'hello ladies' better than the straight from the battlefield look"

Ten minutes later and James was stood in front of a camera crew with Reese counting down in his ear "3...2...1...queue Major..."

James stared into the camera "This is Major Charles James, commander of the special zombie service, with a call for assistance from the public. London is under attack by individuals who have been infected by a bacteria administered against their will. This is a very serious situation but with your help we can deal with the threat in a peaceful way using tried and tested tactics.

"We need to lure those infected to Upton Park Football Stadium in East London where highly trained personnel are ready to neutralise the infection using a process which leaves the individual unharmed. We will attract their attention with a series of visual and verbal stimuli which will be broadcast through television and radio.

"We need those of you who live or work on the main approaches to the stadium..." and here James pointed to various routes on his map which had been pinned to a board "...to take your televisions and radios outside into your front gardens or forecourts right now and leave them playing at full volume. This should be enough to lead those infected to us."

James leant forward grasping the back of a chair "Do not, I repeat, do not remain outside with your appliances. Return inside as soon as you have set them up and stay there until we can confirm that the danger had passed" he then pulled his top off and stared at the screen "thank you for your cooperation."

James nodded at Mansfield Mike and the camera cut to the corporal, who stood in front of the big screen which displayed a huge image of a bare chested James, and began to sing:

"Where have all the good men gone

And where are all the gods?

Where's the street-wise Hercules

To fight the rising odds?"

"Perfect!" shouted Reese in James' ear "if we don't get a BAFTA nomination for that I'll eat my hat"

James pulled his top back on and strode over to Kinders, Nan, Molly and the police inspector who were standing near the crash barriers on the edge of the pitch listening to Mansfield Mike sing:

"I need a hero

I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night"

"Everything ready?" asked James

Kinders responded "Yes Sir. All we need now is for our guests to arrive"

"Very good" said James

Brains then came doubling over with the mobile phone in his hand. "Bossman, Colonel Morley again."

James took the handset

"Jesus Christ James that certainly grabbed the attention" said Morley "I've got most of the women in the office and half the men carrying TV sets out into the street."

"I just hope it works" said James

"So do I, cos I am drawing a blank here. The minister is refusing to see me..." Said Morley

"What?, but that makes no sense" said James

"It does once you know that PharmaCorp's main UK plant is in the man's constituency" replied Morley

"You think he has been compromised?" Asked James concerned

"There is every chance, which means we are going to have to bypass him and go to the top. The Ambassador has put a call in direct to Downing Street. We are waiting for the Prime Minister to become available. Until then James, PharmaCorp will do everything in their power to try and stop you succeeding in your endeavours. Stay alert" cautioned Morley

"I will" said James and ended the call.

James passed the phone back to Brains who was sat on a front row seat with his laptop open.

"What's the latest?" He asked the private

"Looks like we are getting a good response to our appeal sir. We have activity along most of the main routes including the A124, the A13, the A2 and the A501. Our broadcast is being picked up by all the main TV and Radio stations and is being streamed on the web. We also have reports of groups of zombies being drawn along the main approaches and away from the original attack areas"

"Excellent" said James

The Major then made a tour of the stadium checking all was ready. Four immersion tanks had been deployed near to the main service entrance to the pitch. Fingers and Nude Nut were there overseeing a mixed group of Nan's men and police officers who would deal with the first zombies to arrive. James noticed Dave among them and nodded at him in acknowledgement.

"All ok here private?" He asked Fingers

"Yes sir, they have only had a crash course but they are keen. We should be fine " said the private.

"Very good. Just remember when the flow gets too great retreat behind the crash barrier" James reminded him and moved on.

James then walked over to where Molly was organising the post immersion care with the help of some St Johns Ambulance volunteers who had remained after the match had been abandoned.

Mansfield Mike sang on by the big screen, fist clenched, eyes screwed shut in deep emotion:

"I've paid my dues

Time after time.

I've done my sentence

But committed no crime."

"How are we doing Dawes?" he asked

"Not bad considering Boss" she said "You ok?"

James nodded "Think so...Molly" he began "keep safe Ok? And whatever happens here today I just want you to know..."

There was a sudden commotion by the immersion pools which made him break off and stare in that direction

"Are they here?" Said Molly

"Not sure..." replied James and headed off to take a look

As he approached a commanding voice called out "That's him, place him under arrest lieutenant!"

General Collins strode onto the pitch followed by a smirking Lieutenant Ash and a group of Military Police, weapons drawn.

Ash doubled over to James with two MPs who grabbed an arm each while Ash smiled and said "Not dead then sir? In which case I'm afraid you will have to come with us"

James noticed Kinders running to intervene but he shook his head at the Sargent who stopped in his tracks. There was no point in prompting a confrontation, it was too dangerous and they had too many other things to contend with without fighting amongst themselves. They would just have to wait for an opportunity to put their case and hope that it would not then be too late to deal with the zombies.

Just then the thudding of helicopter blades was heard above the sound of Mansfield's singing. The aircraft appeared from behind the Bobby Moore stand and descended to land in the middle of the pitch.

All eyes turned to the lone figure at the controls who shut the engine off and removed his helmet revealing a head of red hair. The man jogged over to where James stood and resolved into the unmistakable figure of Prince Harry, wearing combats with the SZS insignia on his arm together with the rank of Colonel in chief of the service.

"Ah James" said the prince with a smile "I have a bone to pick with you. What's all this about initiating a major zombie operation and not inviting me along. You know how much I like a good immersion jolly"

James grinned "Sorry your highness, didn't really have a chance"

The prince smiled and then said "Who are your friends?"

James grimaced "I am afraid these gentlemen have placed me under arrest sir"

"Really?" Said the Prince "I assume there has been some kind of mistake Lieutenant?" this to Ash who stared at the new arrival in consternation and then opened and closed his mouth a number of times before emitting a high pitched "Errrr"

General Collins then stormed over to the group demanding to know what the hell was going on. He stopped dead when he saw Prince Harry but then mastered his shock and said tightly "Your highness your presence here is inappropriate...this unit is disbanded and their operation is illegal"

"Disbanded, General?" Said the Prince in surprise "As Colonel in Chief surely my permission should have been sought?"

The General gawped "That's just a bit of meaningless protocol sir. You would have been approached in due course"

"I'm afraid the Commander in Chief of the armed forces is a bit of a stickler for protocol General. She also takes the various roles of her family members very seriously. In that context she has summoned you to the palace" and with that the Prince passed the general a sealed envelope with the royal crest on it.

Collins looked at the envelope as he would a venomous snake then snatched it away and tore it open before quickly scanning the content. He looked up and snapped "Lieutenant hold Major James here until I return"

"That won't be necessary General" said the prince. "I will ensure he does not leave the stadium. Sargent Kinders please place the major under arrest"

Kinders doubled over and stood beside James. General Collins narrowed his eyes but then nodded and said "Come along Lieutenant" before stalking off with his men.

Prince Harry watched them leave then turned to Kinders "Release the prisoner Sargent"

Kinders smiled "yes sir"

James turned to the Prince "Thank you sir but you really shouldn't be here. I am a disgraced officer and I'm not sure what we are planning is going to work"

The prince looked at James "My place is with my unit, and as for that video, you are talking to a man who has appeared in the worlds press stark naked. I am not interested in your alleged mistakes Major but how you act when your country really needs you. Now how do I get to do some singing?"

James nodded and said "Tell Private Dangleberries what you want to sing. Mansfield is probably due a break anyway"

The prince strode away and James followed him with his eyes then shook his head in disbelief.

"Sir" called Brains "first lot of zombies approaching!"

"Ok private. Places everyone" he called and went to join the immersion teams. As he did so Mansfield Mike came to the end of his song and Prince Harry took over in front of the big screen. The music started and he launched into his piece:

"God save the queen

The fascist regime

They made you a moron

Potential H-bomb"

James stared down into the dark of the service entrance. After a while a faint shuffling and groaning could be heard, followed shortly by the leading zombies, eyes blazing, clawed hands reaching.

"Stand by" called James to his rag tag unit and then the zombies were among them. James grappled with one, pushing the zombie into an immersion tank and under the surface. James held the zombie down until the thrashing stopped and he could pass the recovering man over into the care of Molly's team.

James then grabbed another and another, only pausing when there were no more zombies at hand. He looked around him and saw the rest of the team engaged in finishing off the last of the infected attackers before Fingers called "more incoming!" and they had to fall to it again.

Over the next hour wave after wave of zombies emerged from the service tunnel and James and his team worked without break until there was an eventual lull. He and the others then collapsed where they stood, exhausted, while Nan and Molly passed around water bottles.

Brains then came running over. "Sir, Colonel Morley on the blower" and passed over the handset.

"James" said Morley "The ambassador has finally been able to get through to the prime minister and present the evidence. The PM has ordered the immediate suspension of the relevant Minister and passed our files to the anti-terrorist Police for investigation. PharmaCorps HQ is being raided as we speak whilst their military base has been sealed off pending decontamination."

"That's great news Sir" said James with huge relief

"How are things going there?" Asked the American

"We have had a few hundred come through so far but the bulk are still on route" said James

"Well" said Morley "help is on the way...Jonathan has called to say he is a few minutes from you...something about not missing this opportunity for the world. Make sure he doesn't get himself killed will you James?"

"Of course sir" said James with a grin and signed off.

Almost immediately Brains called over "Sir, we've got thousands of them coming up the Barking Road from the west"

James nodded and ordered the pitch to be cleared and all personnel to retreat behind the crash barriers. Just as the last person leapt over the makeshift fencing a running figure emerged from the service tunnel dressed in a long coat and clutching a pair of high heels in their hand.

James smiled as the figure approached. "Welcome Jonathan, we've been expecting you"

Beck put his hands on his knees and breathed deeply "Goodness I'm out of shape. Had to put a turn of speed on to avoid the zombie hoards. Anyway wasn't going to miss out on a stadium gig in front of a national television audience"

"Well" said James "you're just in time cos I think Prince Harry needs a bit of a break. Duetting 'I've Got You Babe' with Mansfield Mike has just about done him in"

Beck grinned "I think that would spell the end for most of us" He then frowned, grabbing something under his coat and hitch it further up his hips.

James stared in confusion "Everything ok?"

"You should try running with the costume I've got on. Gusset issues are not the half of it!" and so saying he removed his coat to reveal a black body stocking with glove like patched of fabric at the breasts and midriff.

James stared "goodness that is...striking"

"Do you like it?" Said Beck proudly. "It's from my latest range. If you press this button the gloves flex, but I seem to have a short somewhere in the wiring" Then with a wave Beck tripped off to mount the stage.

James shook his head then turned at a shouted warning to see the mouth of the service tunnel filled with hundreds of shuffling, groaning zombies. Wave upon wave of them came shambling onto the pitch in an ungainly viscous tide groping towards the noise and spectacle around the large screen at the far end of the stadium.

The crash barriers at the sides of the pitch were used to channel the groaning horde towards the screen where a double line of barriers, police, soldiers and Nan's employees sought to corral and contain the infected host.

Beck strode around the stage filling the four corners of the stadium with song:

"Humidity is rising

Barometer's getting low

According to our sources

The street's the place to go"

The zombies continued to crowd in, slowly filling the pitch until the green of the grass was completely obscured by the monstrous throng.

"Its raining men, hallelujah

Its raining men, amen"

The front rows of the zombies were starting to press against the crash barriers, hands raised towards the stage, clawing the air. The small number of soldiers, police and others on the opposite side of the fence strained every sinew to hold the line.

Kinders shouted to James through gritted teeth "We can't hold them much longer sir"

James turned and shouted up to Brains "how many more?"

"Just a few stragglers sir and we will have them all" came the response

James lent his own weight to the barriers, ducking to avoid the grasping hands but the fence was shifting, the thin line buckling.

"Brains!"

"Hold on!"

"Brains!"

"All in sir, all in!"

James turned and gave the signal to Nan, at the same time bellowing "turn it on, turn it on!". She pressed a button on the wall beside her and a second later the ground's sprinkler system lept into life, sending jets of the antidote into the air all around the ground. Within minutes thousands of gallons of solution had been pumped onto the crowded pitch and the zombies were falling in droves, thrashing around on the muddy ground like a huge haul of landed fish.

James surveyed the scene from the side lines where Molly joined him. He turned and smiled at her and she returned it before sliding her arm around his waste and resting her head on his shoulder.

"We did it" she said

"Only just...but yes we did" he replied.

"Better start the post immersion care boss" she stated and made to move away

James caught her hand as it passed his and looked down intensely into her upturned face.

"Marry me..." he whispered

"Yes." She replied...

A month later Major Charles James brought the first company of the Special Zombie Service to attention. Horseguards looked resplendent in the spring sunshine and the assembled dignitaries had to shade their eyes as they looked on from the nearby stand. Among them were Molly's and James' families proudly waving union jacks.

The weeks since the Upton Park operation had been a blur of activity. The clean up after the attack had taken days with hundreds of ambulances ferrying the recovering victims to hospitals throughout the South East. Then had come the decontamination at the ex military base on Salisbury Plain, followed by multiple debriefings and interviews to say nothing of the intense media interest.

Details of the plot by PharmaCorp had become public soon after the raid on their headquarters and the questioning of a number of company officials. This was followed by the revelation of complicity by a senior minister and a small number of high ranking army officers, leading to a round of suspensions and arrests. The final piece of the jigsaw came with the capture of what the media described as the mastermind behind the plot, when he was on the point of boarding a jet for Moscow with a briefcase full of zombie pathogen.

James vaguely recognised the wild eyed and dishevelled man in the police mug shots but couldn't quite place him. A full confession followed including the detail of how the plot had set out to discredit the SZS and James himself through a smear campaign in the press and on the internet.

Interest in the service and James himself had been at fever pitch ever since. Toy producers were even creating a series of action figures, including a fully posable Major James doll complete with headset, removable shirt and paddling pool. Molly had nearly ruptured herself laughing when the design team had called around to make detailed measurements for the modellers.

With everything that had been going on he and Molly had had little time to discuss the wedding. However, two weeks of leave beckoned for both of them and there would be time enough then.

However, now James had to focus as the monarch's escort approached bearing the new service colours. A red zombie head pierced by a blade with the legend 'Attract, Immerse, Revive' on a scroll across the bottom, and below that their battle honours 'Afghanistan' and 'West Ham'

The End