Here comes chapter two... plus a little teasing.

Next instalment will be The One Where Jess Gets Really (Really) Angry.

Enjoy!

It's been five weeks since Jess moved out of the loft and they haven't seen each other since that night, but tonight it's Cece and Schmidt's wedding dinner rehearsal and he knows she will be there. He looks at himself on the mirror and his reflection is unrecognizable even to him. The dark circles that seem to have made a home under his eyes and the full-on beard he's sporting make him look ten years older, and so when Schmidt asks him to shave and moisturize he decides not to argue and does so. Beard free and suit clad, there's nothing he can do about the hollowness in his eyes.

He arrives at the restaurant early, but Schmidt and Cece are already there and she hugs him tight when she sees him. He's never been a fan of hugs, but this one is so weirdly comforting he just relaxes into it and hugs her back. Schmidt pats his shoulder and smiles at him, and Nick smiles back but his mind can only focus on one thing.

And it's like he doesn't even need to see her to feel that she's here, and so when he turns around and his eyes meet hers from across the room everything stops and she's all he sees. She is walking straight towards him, but before she can reach him Cece launches herself at her and Nick snaps out of his trance. He looks at them hug, the two of them smiling as Schmidt joins them and kisses Jess' cheek.

She looks beautiful and somewhat happy, and Nick is miserable but the thought that she isn't makes him feel better. She is still talking to Schmidt and Cece, but when her eyes settle on him he knows she's no longer listening to whatever they are telling her. A minute later and she turns around to him, stepping forward until she reaches him.

"Hey, Nick", she says, and he shudders at the sound of her voice because it's been five weeks and he feels like he's almost gone crazy without her. She's looking at him now, really looking at him, and she bites her lip in a nervous gesture.

"Hi, Jess", he answers, and he doesn't know what to say. He knows what he wants to say, but he also knows she doesn't want to hear it, and so he shuts his mouth and keeps staring at her.

"I missed you", she says then, and he snaps his head up in surprise. She missed me, he thinks, and his heart is thumping loudly but he gulps the sound down.

"I missed you too", he says, and wonders if maybe she does want to hear his apology again. But he doesn't get a chance to speak before she leans towards him and places her lips by his ear.

"I want to talk to you", she says. "Wait for me when this is over?"

He feels himself nod at her words but then Schmidt is pushing them towards the table and making them sit next to each other, and then he looks up at Cece and she's smiling at him. But Nick and Jess are so busy staring at each other they completely miss the knowing look their soon-to-be-married friends cast at them.

Jess lets him drive her home and asks him to come up with her so they can talk, and he wonders if maybe this is all a dream because if it is he doesn't want to wake up. He follows her into the apartment, and when she sits down on her couch and motions for him to follow, he lets his knees touch hers and stares at her.

She's looking right back at him, because it's been five weeks and she really has missed him. He doesn't look good, he looks tired and exhausted and Jess knows it's because of her, it's because of their fight and because he hasn't stopped thinking about it. Not that she has, but she's a far better actress than him. They do nothing but stare at each other for a while, and then Nick just can't take it anymore and has to break the silence.

"Jess, I…", he starts, and he hears his own unsteady voice and wills himself to calm the fuck down. He knows she obviously wants to talk, and he knows what he wants to tell her, but he's so scared he's going to push her away again he can't find the words to speak.

"Nick", she sighs, and she's clearly having a hard time with words as well. "I missed you", she says again, "and I'm sorry about what I've done to you."

He's staring at her again, his expression contorting into a full turtle face. He shakes his head because he clearly heard that wrong. She what?

"I'm sorry that I slapped you", she says then. "And I'm sorry I moved out without telling you", she adds, and he can't believe she's apologizing to him. He feels his mouth opening in shock and watches her in disbelief. Because of all the things he'd imagined she would say to him, an apology had not been an option.

"It's just…", she continues, but he interrupts her then.

"You're apologizing to me?", he slowly says, incredulity all over his face, and she nods her head.

"We're friends, Nick, and I overreacted", she tells him. Friends, she says, and doesn't miss the flinch that passes over him.

"But I'm not gonna lie, Nick. What you did… That was a dick move", she says, and he remembers telling her the exact same words and shudders. "But I can't lose you because of it", she states, and now he's sure he's dreaming because there is no way this is happening. "I just can't", she says, and then her eyes are tearing up and he can't believe she's doing this.

"Jessica", he says, and he moves to sit closer to her and grabs her hand. She flinches lightly at his touch, but lets him hold onto her and brings her eyes up to his face. "There is absolutely no excuse for what I did", he tells her, and she opens her mouth ready to argue but he's not done. And he's not going to lie and tell her he was drunk or any other lame excuse, because the one thing he's never been able to do is lie to her.

"But I need you to believe me when I say it didn't mean anything", he says, and it feels like the hundredth time he's told her but he needs her to believe him. Because even though there is no excuse, there is nothing in the world that matters more to him than her. "She didn't mean anything, Jess", he says, and he's never been more honest about anything in his life. And it's been six weeks since that night, and he's still disgusted at himself.

"It doesn't matter, Nick", she sighs, "I had no right to…"

"Bullshit", he interrupts, and tightens his grip on her hand. "And I don't want to hear another apology from you, ok?", he says, and his voice is serious and his jaw is set. She nods her head slowly, her hand shaking under his because she's desperate to fix them. She knows she can't let anything, anyone, come in between them- especially not this.

"Nick, I just want us to be… Us again. You are still my best friend", she says, and he knows what she means but he also knows he wants more than what she's offering. "I just want you back", she says, and he nods his head and he's about to take a leap of faith, because he's pushing his luck but he's so tired and he needs to be fucking brave for once in his life.

Because he's been holding it back for two years and he's fucked up so many times and he knows he has no right to tell her what he's about to.

"I want nothing more than to have you back in my life", he says, and when her eyes light up at his words he knows he doesn't deserve her. Because after everything she's still willing to forgive him, willing to move forward and leave the past behind. He tugs her hand forward and sees the tears shining fresh in her cheeks, and he hates himself but he can't stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth.

"But not as my friend. Because I still love you, Jess. I never stopped."