Blizzaga Saga: Phew…I worked really hard on this chapter. There's a lot here, so have fun with it like I did! The Oni thing is finally explained, negotiations begin, and Link has his first sexual encounter…of sorts. :P Like I said, I put a lot of effort into this, so please review, and don't get used to these long chapters. ;)

"I already told you I don't need your help." With an unnecessary slap, Abia knocked the potion he had just brewed from his hand, and he fell to catch it before it could spill into the sand. Link stood again and put the bottle away wordlessly, too hot to stay angry but also wondering why he bothered being nice, for the ever-staring sun punished every deed good and bad the same.

His steps were less sure than theirs in the dunes, and each step was hard and deliberate to keep him from falling against the Gerudo who, for whatever reason, chose to surround him. Two women walked on either side of him, closely enough that he felt like a criminal being escorted and that he saw each of their faces clearly: Yumn and Nailah stared ahead with disinterest, not bothering to watch him. Abia frowned and scrunched up her large nose, and Gelbooru smiled with suppressed laughter at her disgruntled expression.

"I still don't see why we have to help with the water today," Abia said distastefully. Her ponytail, longer than that of anyone else present, fell and bounced back up with each step like she was on a casual stroll, like there was nothing strenuous or unusual about walking through ever-shifting terrain. "This is the whites' job. I became a purple so I could do something more important."

"What's more important than providing water?" asked Link, genuinely confused and eager to quench his thirst.

She seemed to take offense at his remark as she had taken offense at every other thing he'd said or done today. "I am a soldier, not a servant. Why are you doing this, anyway? Why do you want to go out there and help?"

"Because being a warrior is about more than fighting," he replied instantly, and she furrowed her brow.

"What did Aveil want with you? Is she making you do this?"

"No. She told me she wanted to fight again later, when we each have our preferred weapons."

A mocking laugh. "She's going to beat your ass into the sand."

"Maybe," he said neutrally. Remembering the time of his arrival, he soothed his boiling brain with thoughts of the sun setting in just a few hours. But then he realized it would rise again tomorrow, and Link wondered whether he would rise with it or if the cycle of his life would end tonight.

Abia stopped and turned on him when he didn't say anything else, getting right in his face for not the first time. "Where do you get off, disrespecting our leader?" she nearly yelled. At the edge of Link's vision, Nailah and Yumn finally started paying attention, apparently deciding the confrontation was interesting enough to take in now and talk about later.

His aggressor drew a slim two-handed sword, but Link didn't move. He knew she was only trying to pick a fight, but despite his anger, he couldn't do anything to endanger his peaceful mission. "I meant no disrespect. I only meant that as a warrior, I will do my best to beat her."

"You're not a warrior."

A dozen scathing, sarcastic remarks came to mind, but he said nothing, and soon the group started moving again. Coming at last to a canyon that fell a good hundred feet beneath them, Link voiced the question that had been on his mind since he left the fortress. "Is this how you always collect water?"

"Why? Too high up for you, Hylian?" This was getting childish. Link ignored Abia and listened instead to Gelbooru.

"There are a few spots where oases are known to form. Usually we can live off of those, but when they are dried up we climb down to the river."

Far below the bridge that connected Hyrule Field to Gerudo Valley, the water that would eventually empty into Lake Hylia raged, crashing against cragged rocks. Link mused that falling in could be fatal. Nonetheless, several ropes tied to various anchors went over the edge, and after Yumn went first to show him what to do, he followed. A path of thin walkways and loose rocks led them down, so he only had to pull his rope when he felt he might fall, and after only a few close calls he made it to the more level ground at the water's edge.

He was astonished to find a myriad of people already there. Women in white garb dipped pots and other containers into the river. They were made of red clay which, judging from the color of the riverbed, came from here. To his relief, his four bodyguards dispersed to different parts of the bank, and everyone else seemed too busy to pay attention to him. The many strangers dipped their hands into the soothing streams, and guessing that each person was supposed to take care of him- or herself before working, Link took his hat off and let his long blond hair spill out. Though the others were remarkably reserved in their cleansing, Link didn't care about looking like a fool, so when splashing his face didn't bring enough relief he dunked his head underwater. Gasping before he even resurfaced, he reveled in the cool water dripping from his scalp, which felt like it had been burned even through his hair and hat.

He blushed when he opened his eyes; everyone in the vicinity stared blatantly at him. He must have looked like a freak to them: male, pale, blond, and blue-eyed. With humiliating dignity, he put his cap on and turned away to take another drink.

"I've never seen someone whose hair wasn't red before." To his alarm, Gelbooru was less than a foot away, and in his fright he almost fell into the river. She didn't back away and only stared at him with something resembling awe. But then she frowned. "I'm sorry about Abia."

"I understand. What confuses me is why she treats you poorly."

"You may have noticed that I don't wear what she, Yumn, and Nailah wear. Like everyone else here, I'm of a lower class than they are, so my full name is Gelbooru of the White."

She also had shorter hair than his other three bodyguards. Remembering how Aveil in turn had longer hair than those wearing purple, he assumed it was class-related. "I'm just Link. I have no rank or surname." Her eyes surveyed his every feature as though searching for something. He tried desperately not to let his eyes do the same, which was difficult considering the water she had splashed onto the cloth covering her breasts. "Um, so she looks down on you?"

"The whole village looks down on me. My mother ran off with a Hylian man shortly after I was born, so I've had trouble moving up in rank. I can't even get anyone to properly train me in weapon use."

It made sense: she did look less athletic than the other guides, slimmer and a bit less muscular with a more defined bust. Combined with her less than impressive height and smaller than average nose—a trait that surely came from her father—it made her look cute. He shook the thought. "I'm sorry to hear that. My parents are absent from my life as well, and I know what it's like to be judged for that. It's hard to become a knight when you don't have a well-known lineage. But in the end it doesn't make you less than anyone else. It won't keep you from becoming a fighter, if that's what you really want."

She smiled widely and her eyes shone with gratitude, and he wondered if this was the first genuine encouragement anyone had given her. No longer able to bear the attention, he started working.

Carrying water was hard, but carrying it up a cliff while holding a rope for safety was far more demanding. A group assisted him every step of the way and followed with their own jars to meet more Gerudo who sat in waiting at the top. Most were in their teens or twenties, but Link was horrified to find that a good number were older than women who had retired in Castle Town. They moved with great fatigue, resigned to their usual tasks. No young children were there to help or play or get their daily water supply.

They whispered "Oni" loudly as though he weren't there, but they stared at him like nothing else was. Once when he helped an elderly with her container, she said "Thank you, sis—" before freezing when she saw who helped her. Then her wrinkled mouth opened to reveal missing teeth and black gums, and she fell to the ground in prayer. "Forgive me for almost calling you sister."

Just as not everyone came from his age group, not everyone climbed the rocks as he did. Many more experienced women opted not to use a rope in order to better secure their loads.

"We have a woman down!" Abia yelled over the rapids, and Link looked at the old woman in her arms. Judging from the bruise on her side, she had taken a nasty fall, and while many aged people functioned normally in everyday life, he knew that sometimes minor injuries could be deadly for them because their bodies were so slow to heal.

"Lift her head up," he said, and when she obeyed, he poured his blue potion down the stranger's throat. Within moments her eyes shot open and looked around in wild confusion.

"Wh-where am I? How—" Then she saw him. "Am I dreaming, to be healed by you? Thank you, Oni. And thank you as well, Abia, for catching me when I fell." Abia set her down. They watched her walk off together, and when they were alone, Abia turned toward him.

"Thank you." It was surprisingly gentle, her first non-abrasive comment to him, and he simply nodded before returning to work, unsure how else to react.

Some time later, he and Gelbooru had finished pouring water over the onion plants in this most fertile part of the desert and began pulling weeds. On her hands and knees, Gelbooru worked at a stubborn root, her hanging bosoms jiggling with each pull. Link briefly wished the Gerudo's pants were as revealing as their tops so he could see that part of her too before severely reprimanding himself. Staying with so many women was bad for his spiritual health.

"What makes a man do something dangerous when he doesn't have to?" she asked when they stood to take a break.

"Huh?"

"Are men just reckless like that, or do you have a special reason for helping us with this? You don't know these paths like we do, yet you promised to climb the cliff over and over until everyone is gone. You could get hurt, and it would be completely pointless."

There was no insult or accusation in her tone, only curiosity, and Link smiled. He looked at the sun again and saw it was closer to setting. "Sometimes I'm happy when things are dangerous, because it reminds me that someone has to do them. It reminds me that there's a difference between what's right and what easy. I would rather die doing what's right than live a coward."

"…You know," she said at last. He nodded. "Link, I'm so sorry. I—"

"Your leader clearly has me confused with someone who has done something terrible, but I will not leave. It would only make it look like Hyrule was harboring a criminal, and that would only hurt relations between the Gerudo and Hylians. No, it's up to me to prove I'm here to help both our peoples." Galloping away on Epona without a backward glance and leaving negotiations to someone else was the safe and easy thing to do, but it wasn't the right thing to do. And that, he thought with finality, was the difference between courage and cowardice.

She gaped at him in wonder, and he smiled gently back, at peace with himself and his decision. Then she threw herself at him and pressed her lips to his. Link's eyes remained wide long after she quickly pulled back, his inner peace completely and irrevocably disturbed. Then she ran off, leaving him to dumbly stare ahead.

"I saw that!" a voice boomed happily behind him, and he turned without paying much attention to the woman who entered his vision. "What just happened?" Nailah gushed. "Tell me everything."

It took a moment for Link to process what was going on. That was his first kiss. Her essence lingered on his lips, and his heart beat quickly. "Um…" He physically shook his head. He could worry about it later. For now, he had a great opportunity to finally learn about the word everyone kept throwing around. "Aveil called you and Yumn the local gossips. If you answer a question for me, I'll tell you anything you want to know. Who is Oni? Be specific and give as much detail as you can; otherwise I'm not saying a word."

"Sure! He's brother to the goddesses, and like a brother he looks out for anyone who has suffered a great injustice or is too weak to defend themselves. He was once on equal esteem with Farore, Nayru, and Din before they unjustly exiled him from the heavens and cursed to live imprisoned in flesh on Earth, much as the Gerudo were exiled from Hyrule long ago and forced to live in the desert. Seeing his pain and his virtues, the goddess of the sand opened her bosom to him, and this sacred union between deities created the Gerudo race. From her we receive our indomitable spirit and immunity to the desert's harshness—hence the Spirit Temple dedicated to her in the most inhospitable part of the desert—and from him we receive the strength of body that makes us the fiercest warriors in the world." There was that word again—fierce—and Link remembered how Aveil had used it. Some message tried to break through his ignorance, but he couldn't quite grasp it. "Oni is a protector and a warrior, and it is said that every Gerudo male is a gift from him to help us through our misfortune. We cherish every one of Oni's blessings, and thus whenever a male is born into our race he becomes our king."

"I thought Gerudo considered all men worthless. I had no idea you held such reverence for any male deities."

"Not all men are worthless: just those not born from Oni's spirit."

Link smirked. "So just those who aren't Gerudo?"

She smirked back playfully. "Exactly. However, you are a curious case. Aveil isn't convinced you don't have Gerudo blood somewhere in you. Many here think you are Oni incarnate. That's why they act like it's a privilege just to be around you."

"I'm not a god," he refuted immediately. "Claiming such is folly."

"Your appearance and abilities bear an uncanny similarity to his. And it's worth noting that in one of our greatest times of need, one who resembles him has come to help. Anyway, I've told you what you want to know, so give me details: what happened?"

"She kissed me," he said simply before walking away.

"Huh? Hey! My explanation was way better than that!" She pursued him, but by this time everyone was leaving and he easily separated himself from her during the climb.

Abia waited for him at the top. "Come. It's time for tonight's meeting." The other three joined them and they left, Link once again at the center of the tight formation. The two gossips spoke conspiratorially in hushed tones while Gelbooru was quiet and withdrawn. He thought of saying something to her, but it would have to wait. He had to be mentally prepared, for tonight would determine not just the fate of international relations, but whether he lived to see another day.

It was far too quiet outside. Even the wind stayed silent, and Link wished for people to be staring at him again, if only so he could shake the suspicion that they were all hiding in ambush, ready to capture him the moment he entered their home. Unfortunately, his suspicions turned out to be completely true: in a large hall at the center of the fortress, Aveil and Samiyah waited at a large table while at least a hundred women both white and purple lined the walls, apparently not important enough to sit at the table. When he took his place opposite the two women, his escorts dispersed. Yumn and Nailah guarded the entrance he just came from, Gelbooru took her place with the other whites, and Abia sat beside Samiyah. Link attempted to get over his unease and focus on why he was here.

"Let's get this over with," Aveil said in a bored tone. She still eyed him in the same disarming way, and he wondered what tactical purpose that had now that she wasn't trying to beat him in battle. "We only have to do this once, right?"

Link shook his head sadly. "Negotiations will not be concluded today. I don't have that authority. I am a low-ranking official, so the best I can do is draw up a potential treaty with you and recommend it to her majesty after I leave. Then I'll come back and inform you that the treaty has been ratified or vetoed. If the latter, we will work on drawing up another and continue until we achieve results."

"This could take forever, then."

"I'm not looking forward to it either, but remember that it's not me you're negotiating with; it's the monarch."

"Very well. I would now ask everyone who is not seated at this table to silence themselves." When all chatting stopped, she continued. "Should we reach an agreement, the final decision from my people is mine, but I defer the privilege of discussion to Samiyah. As my elder, she is one of the only sisters with experience dealing in foreign relations."

Link directed his shocked gaze to the stern older woman. It made sense that she had past dealings with Hylians since she was probably older than thirty, and given Hyrule's history, those encounters probably hadn't been pleasant. Could that be part of why she had been so hostile to him so far? As a Hylian, was he an unhappy reminder of times best forgotten? "We have much to discuss," she said rigidly.

Finally, he was getting somewhere. "So why is now in particular a trying time?"

"In normal circumstances we could survive in the desert for eternity despite its difficulty, but we are dying nonetheless. As long as we are forbidden from crossing into Hyrule, we cannot find suitors and give birth to new generations. Since the new laws enacted by your people seven years ago forbade us entry into your kingdom, our eldest have died without anyone to replace them, and most of our younger sisters have already matured into adults."

"Ah, so that's why I haven't seen any children here."

"Yes. We need other things of course, but our most urgent concern is increasing our population. Everything else can wait until we are done discussing that."

"It's my understanding that before Ganondorf attempted to take over Hyrule, the Gerudo were granted limited entry to Hyrule for that purpose."

She nodded. "That is correct."

"However, I also understand that during that time there were problems with theft and Hylian men being kidnapped."

"We had need of things that the Hylians were unwilling to trade us," defended Samiyah. "And when men would not cooperate, we had to be forceful."

"I don't care whether your actions were justified. If we are to legally allow you into Hyrule, then we can't do things like we did in the past. Theft won't be tolerated, nor will abducting anyone against their will. Hylian men will probably respond better if your advances are less aggressive. I can't say I witnessed anything, but apparently men were quite frightened by you."

Samiyah scoffed. "Then men should be less weak." Link ignored the smirk Abia sent him from across the table.

"That's enough," Aveil spoke. "We're getting distracted. Samiyah, I ask that you keep your temper in check, as Link is only here to help us."

She frowned. "I am not so sure of that."

"Oh? And why is that?"

Samiyah directed her hardened gaze to Link. "Your name is Link, correct?"

"Yes," he answered, finding it difficult to force down the increased sense of foreboding twisting in his stomach.

"And what is your full name?"

"Link is my full name. I was orphaned and my parents were unknown, so I have no surname."

He didn't like the way she nodded, as if he had just confirmed something to her. "In the interest of everyone present today and of those who could not attend, I would like to reveal the details of an ongoing investigation of the circumstances surrounding our late king's demise. As you all know, our efforts to create a network of spies in Hyrule Castle have recently come to fruition." Link stiffened, knowing only one reason why she would reveal the existence of spies in Hyrule to a Hylian diplomat. "We finally know why the Great Ganondorf was executed: a young boy stumbled upon his plans and warned the king. We have not been able to find a surname for him, but we know that his first name is Link. Link, you told me earlier that Ganondorf frightened you when you were young. Does that mean you were at the castle during that period?"

He couldn't believe he never saw this coming. All this time, he really was the person who had harmed the Gerudo. "Yes."

"I am sure that by now you understand my allegations against you. Do you deny them?"

"…No," he answered after a pause. "I warned the royal family. I did it to save the king's life and keep Hyrule from falling into Ganondorf's clutches."

"I don't care whether your actions were justified," Samiyah quipped, mimicking his earlier words. "The current state of my people is a direct result of what you did."

Abia no longer smirked—she actually looked a bit worried—and Aveil's confident gaze fell briefly as she said, "I really do regret this, Link, but for the death of our king, you must be punished. I will personally decide your fate later, but for now, our purples and reds will take you to a holding cell."

It was true what they said in Hyrule: a Gerudo could look beautiful even as she executed you. Link looked around in horror as the entire crowd approached him slowly. Though he still had his weapon, he could not hope to fight his way through this many people in such a small space.

"Supposed queen of the Gerudo, your king is not dead!" came a screech that silenced all movement. Aveil's always-present composure left as she looked around in fright, and Link looked around as well, wanting to know who held that kind of power. A chill swept through the room, and two creatures floated over the heads of the guards into the room. Each rode a broomstick kept aloft by an unseen force, and they cackled as they came to the table. Though they both had sickly green skin, their bodies forever tainted as Ganondorf's was from using dark magic, which hung from their cheeks, their hair was startlingly different. Flames danced atop one's head while ice stuck to the other. Link watched the forms of Twinrova made their grand entrance.

"We forbade you to return here under penalty of death!" Samiyah fumed. "Why are you here?"

They cackled some more, circling just overhead as though they were merely children having fun. "Why do you seem so unhappy? You used to show us such respect!" one replied.

"You've descended into madness since we lost Ganondorf, and you have become a danger to us."

"So you forbid us to leave the Spirit Temple?"

"Banishment in the desert is tantamount to murder. We allow you to inhabit the temple out of mercy."

Link was already planning ahead. Since he didn't have the Mirror Shield or the Master Sword, he didn't know whether he could beat them if they attacked. The low ceiling did not allow them to float high, however; if he acted quickly, he could hit them with his sword before they escaped.

The one with fire stopped and fixed her stare on Aveil. "Like we said, our Lord Ganondorf is not dead."

"No," said the other, "we would be able to find his remains were that the case. Something else must have happened to him."

"You!" one cackled, extending a bony finger at Link, and both sisters hovered around him now. Their noses and eyes almost took up their whole faces, and the emptiness in those pupils spoke of deteriorated minds.

"We sense a presence in you, one we have not felt in many years…" Link gripped the hilt of his sword. Did they somehow still recognize him as the Hero of Time, even though they'd only met in the alternate timeline? They stared at him hungrily, inching closer, and he flinched as they suddenly shot forward, ready to defend himself…

Only to find that they were both hugging him and crying. "You honor us with your presence! It does our old hearts good to see you here after what happened to our poor son." Link froze at the absurdity of it and looked to the Gerudo. They all seemed just as dumbfounded as he was.

"We raised Ganondorf to be fierce like you, and ruthless. We raised him to take over Hyrule, but now we cannot even sense him! But don't worry; we created an army of moblins to find him. He will return, and the desert will have its revenge on Hyrule!"

The implications of her statement hit Link like a slap in the face. "You're responsible for the monsters?" he asked, voice low and dangerous.

"Of course! Who else other than Ganondorf could create those brutish things? Anything to recover the gift you gave us, Fierce Oni!"

Link's heart thudded in his chest. Fierce Oni? Was that who everyone thought he was? The Fierce Deity, the one who helped him save Termina? It made so much sense now. He had been an idiot not to realize it after hearing the word "fierce" so many times. The notion of him being a god was completely ridiculous…but maybe he could use it to save everyone from Twinrova. "Koume. Kotake."

They released him and squealed in glee. "You remember us!"

Link unsheathed his weapon. The guards watched, but did not stop him. "I put an end to Ganondorf."

Their grins faltered. "You? But—"

Light exploded from his blade as energy pulsed from it. The spin attack he learned from Death Mountain's great fairy was ready. He put every bit of his magical power into it until flames danced across the edges. Judging by how the witches backed away, he had succeeded in creating a powerful enough display to frighten them. "You're right: he's not dead, because I banished him to another realm. He was a power-hungry fool who fancied himself more powerful than me and tried to become a god by stealing the Triforce. For his arrogance I cast him into the Twilight Realm with the other traitors to the gods."

"O-oh…"

"And you," he hissed. "In your pointless search for him, your moblins have even harmed your sisters." He pointed his blazing sword at them. "End your search, or I will end you."

"Y-yes, my lord."

"Forgive our impudence!"

"Go back to the Spirit Temple, and never come here again. The Gerudo's laws are my laws, so obey them."

They fled on their broomsticks, and a tense silence followed. The energy in the sword dissipated, and everyone gawked at Link, who found himself sweating despite the cold once his rage wore off. "I am not Oni!" he insisted awkwardly, realizing too late that denial would likely only make things worse.

"Koume and Kotake…How did you know their names?" Aveil murmured in shock.

Link sat down. "I…let's just get back on subject. Samiyah, what do you propose for your population problem?" She did not speak, and he stood up quickly. "Well…I think we've done all we can tonight. Aveil, if your guards would escort me back, I'd like to go to bed." He didn't meet anyone's eyes and didn't look up even as he heard a few chairs scraping the floor dissonantly against the silence.

"Yes," Samiyah said at last. "Perhaps that would be best."

Angry with himself and with the situation, Link refused to look up as the four people who'd led him all day took him through the maze of hallways to a small room. "Thank you," he uttered. None followed him inside, and once he was sure the door was closed, he let out his frustration.

How could he have been so incredibly stupid? Surely he could've dealt with Twinrova without screwing up this badly. Link sighed heavily, fighting the urge to scream for fear that it would alarm those outside. It was over and done with, he told himself. He couldn't do anything about it now but demonstrate over the next few days that he was not divine and hope nothing bad came from his indiscretion.

The fact that the witches claimed to have sensed the Fierce Deity inside of him worried him, though. Link recalled his time in Termina and wondered where the mask had gone after he defeated Majora with it. He distinctly remembered putting it on, but the fight that followed was a blur of fury and desperation. He had no memory of taking it off, so…

He shook the thought immediately. There was no deity inside him. He was Link, and nothing more.

A noise interrupted his musings, a soft click and light footsteps, and in the dim light something opened the door just enough to slip into his room before silently closing it. "Who's there?" he called, reaching for his weapon.

"Only a humble and grateful woman," came the breathy reply.

"Are you here to arrest me?" he asked, too depressed to be confused.

"No. I'm here to keep you warm." Gold eyes shone like a cat's in the near-dark, and when her figure came into focus Link felt very much like a frightened mouse. "You're not used to the desert nights. All the heat vanishes, but I can help you adjust." Her playful expression was unlike any he'd seen today, as was her attire, for she did not have the common baggy pants.

More precisely, she didn't have pants at all.

Before he even understood the situation, she closed the distance between them. Still frozen from the revelation of her lack of attire, Link was caught flatfooted as her lips melded with his. Taking one of his hands, she tucked it between her cleavage. Her breasts pressed against his palm and warmed it, and he felt the heat coming from her womanhood, separated from the night air only by a thin layer of underwear. "I give myself to you. Please accept me, Oni!" she begged before kissing him more passionately.

Link started at her "Oni" remark before returning the kiss. He still didn't fully get it, but the dark allowed him to imagine it was Zelda he was touching like this. His hand's position and the crotch rubbing against his made it difficult for him to think. He'd never gotten this sort of attention before, and he wanted to have some relief at last. His erection, now standing proudly and pushing at her underwear as though trying to get inside, begged for attention that she was willing to give. All he had to do was let her. It was easy.

But, he reminded himself with chagrin, it wasn't right. He didn't even know this girl, and she was just giving herself to him without a thought. Plus, he didn't want to be charged with rape on top of everything he was already in trouble for. "Get out." She was far stronger than he anticipated, but he managed to push her away. Her smile grew naughtier.

"Don't worry. I'm the best thief our kind has to offer. No one saw me come in here." Falling onto his bed on her back while still looking up at him hungrily, she shifted her underwear aside with one finger so he could see her slick arousal. "Honor me, Oni!"

Link blushed, and only with great effort did he avert his eyes. His every instinct screamed at him to ravish her as she wanted. "I said leave."

Realizing he was serious, her smile faltered. "But…how can a man resist a woman's charm? Am I not beautiful enough?" He picked up his sword, hoping to scare her off but not planning to use it. She stood up. "F-forgive me, Oni, for thinking a mortal could bed with one who has pleased a goddess."

"Go, and never call me that again."

With a combination of shame, fear, and apology, she fled, and he collapsed against a wall. Despite having thwarted a potentially dangerous and immoral situation, he still wasn't happy. Had he just thrown away a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? His penis throbbed, and his testicles ached at the realization that nothing would happen tonight. Images of what could have been teased his mind, and images of the pure and timid Princess Zelda begging him to fuck her tortured his soul until at length he struck the wall in frustration.

As usual, there was nothing he could do to ease his stress. He certainly wasn't about to masturbate in a village full of women. What if they found him? They would probably be disgusted, and Gerudo were not known for being forgiving of outsiders, so like on so many other nights, he resigned himself to going to bed with blue balls. Not tired but wishing for his mind to stop working for a while, he threw himself onto the bed and tried to sleep.