Next chapter incoming, I'm not sure about this one but I'm also not sure how to present it in a different way. Maybe I'll come back and change this at some point but for now it's done and on to the next one! From this point the Varric/Hawke content of the story is going to increase. AKA Varric stops being stubborn in some ways but way more in others.
I've got a playlist I listen to when I write this, thinking about putting it up on 8Tracks for others to hear while they read maybe? Let me know if you're interested. I'll put something up for each chapter.

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Things had pretty much gone back to normal, apart from the fact that Hawke and Fenris were constantly up in each other's business. As far as I knew there wasn't anything official going on at the moment - not for lack of Hawke trying. It was the fact that she had been trying that was making the events of the next few days even more bizarre. Things had been fine up until a certain point. That certain point being a visit to the City Hall. Aveline was acting squirrely all morning and it had continued on into the early hours of the evening. After performing some strange errands it was apparent that she had a crush on a particular guardsman, who went by Donnic.

In the end Hawke suggested inviting him out for a drink in the Hanged Man. Everyone else could see that this was heading for disaster, so we left the arrangements to her. She invited Donnic out on behalf of Aveline under the guise of a night drinking with friends. The night rolled around and most of us elected to stay out of the way. Fenris and Anders had wanted to stick around just to witness the wreckage but decided they would be too conspicuous to hide from Hawke properly. It would be strange if I wasn't in the tavern, and then she would accuse me of flat out avoiding her - which wasn't wrong.

Three hours ticked by without any sight or sound of Aveline. It was painful to watch, and Donnic was clearly uncomfortable. Eventually he left, Hawke slammed her head against the wood of the table and as I went to check on her I was joined by the missing heroine of the night.

"I'm sorry Hawke," she began, looking sheepish. "I couldn't do it."

"For the Maker's sake, it's not that hard Aveline! Donnic thinks I'm interested in him now!"

"You don't know what it's like, I'm not used to this sort of thing!"

"I get rejected all the time, it doesn't matter."

"Yes it does, it might not matter to you but I really like Donnic."

There was a brief silence where Hawke considered this and leant back in her chair. She looked at Aveline with an unreadable expression. Eventually she sighed and leant forward, gesturing for Aveline and I to sit with her. I sat in the seat beside her and Aveline across from her.

"Alright, what else can I do to help you?"

"You don't have to do this for me, I know I'm hopeless."

Hawke smirked at that, but shook her head all the same.

"Not quite hopeless, just inexperienced."

We discussed what could be done, and eventually came to the conclusion that a group of us would clear out Donnic's route before he took it to give Aveline a chance to talk to him uninterrupted. Once that was settled on we gathered up those that were to be involved. Hawke decided that it would be me, her, Isabella and Fenris who cleared the route. We could do it quickly and relatively quietly so as not to arouse suspicion - and Isabella really wanted to get the juicy details first hand.

Hopeless was turning out to be the appropriate word. Each time they reached a guard post they were no closer to discussing a relationship than they were before. Fenris was chastising her lack of honesty, Hawke side-eyeing him as he spoke, and Isabella was spouting off as many dirty jokes as she could get away with.

"You're surprisingly quiet, Varric." She noted while Hawke and Fenris walked ahead of us.

"Who, me? Nah, you're just too loud."

"Got something on your mind?"

"This might make a good story one day, just committing it to memory."

She didn't seem convinced, but she dropped the subject nonetheless. The thoughtful way she observed Hawke and Fenris told me she worked most of it out without any help anyway. I didn't have a right to be jealous, but I was. Maybe it was knowing that my best friend wasn't going to have as much time for me any more.

By the end of the route Aveline still hadn't said anything, and Hawke's patience ran out.

"Aveline."

She appeared in front of them, we all followed behind - Isabella and I were enjoying the awkwardness a bit too much.

"Hawke, don't."

"What's going on here?" Donnic was rightly confused, and Isabella put a hand to her mouth and called to him from our position a short distance away.

"Aveline's got something she really needs to talk to you about. Something a little saucy."

"What?"

"Yes, but she's doing a really bad job of confessing it." Hawke added, to which Donnic walked off after some grumbling. He was frustrated with the mixed messages he'd been receiving all day.

"Hawke, I thought we were friends." Aveline gave her a look that would shut Justice up.

"You'll thank me later."

"You keep trying to force me, it's harder than it looks."

"It's really not that hard. Anyone here I could kiss and it would be less awkward than that display you just put on."

"Oh really, like you could just do that and it would be completely fine?"

Aveline and Hawke continued their argument for a while, and the rest of us zoned out. Eventually I was aware that my name was spoken and a finger was pointing in my direction. Realisation dawned and hit me in the gut like a rock.

"No." I protested flatly. "Not a chance."

"See Hawke, it's not that easy." Aveline looked smug, Hawke gave me an expression akin to a kicked puppy.

"But it is. Varric come on, just this once? Help me to help her."

Reluctantly I walked over to them, I was aware of Isabella snickering behind me and Fenris clearing his throat in disapproval.

Hawke was right, it wasn't that hard. We were just proving a point to Aveline, right? Then why was I so conscious of her body, the way she held herself. I felt the overwhelming pressure of her presence next to me. I braced myself, for what I wasn't exactly sure, but I did it all the same. Hawke placed a kiss on my forehead first, turning to look at Aveline and declaring 'see, that was easier than half the stuff you do on a daily basis guard captain'. She'd protested that kissing your best friend on the forehead, whom you were already 'sickeningly' close to did not amount to her confessing to Donnic being easy.

So then Hawke had kissed me on the lips this time. Longer than our first encounter of this kind, just long enough to be considered a real kiss. Her hand lingered longer than necessary on the back of my neck as she turned away and back to Aveline who conceded defeat.

"Okay, okay, I get your point. I'm sure I can try to talk to Donnic. I'm sorry that it even came to this silliness."

If only Aveline knew how positively completely awkward it actually had been. In fact it had been the most awkward experience of my life and I was forced to place it at the back of my mind once again and ignore it for as long as possible. This would never be addressed, Hawke would have no reason to mention it because we were just encouraging Aveline right? Then why had her hand stayed like that, why was she refusing to look at me right now, Andraste's tits.

Isabella whistled low and Fenris poked her in the gut, the resultant sound was a choked cry. I was about to say something when Hawke crouched to my level and put an arm around my shoulders.

"Feeling left out Izzy? Best friends only."

The pirate laughed, even Fenris smirked slightly. Just like that Hawke made it normal again.

"Yeah sorry, perks of the sidekick position." I added.

"Oh yeah, the dynamic duo, you guys are disgusting." It was affectionate teasing to cover my awkwardness, Fenris' discomfort and Isabella's embarrassment at Hawke's knowledge of her crush.

"Bitches get stitches." Hawke jibed, pulling a mock gang member pose, nudging me to follow suit. Which of course I did, enthusiastically.

We gave Aveline some time to cool off, and in the end things worked out well for her and Donnic. All the day's events lead him to talk to her of his own volition and they were able to talk openly about their feelings. They began a relationship. It was maybe one of the only things that Hawke and I felt we'd helped create that was good in the world. It felt like the light was coming back into our lives.

So why was I lying awake through the night replaying the day over and over again in my mind?