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The Journey Home

Chapter Eight

Everything and Nothing

Scarlett had been taught all of her life that patience was a virtue, but it wasn't necessarily a virtue she had learned to embrace. Her mind was too occupied with too many things that she didn't want to think about, namely the fear that Rhett wouldn't come to Tara to help her. It had been a week since she had sent the telegram and she hadn't heard anything back from him. So, instead of thinking about that, she threw herself into Careen's wedding preparations.

She wanted Careen to have a beautiful wedding, one that she would carry with her the rest of her life. The first thing she wanted to do was to brighten the halls and rooms of the house, so she set about having all of the rooms opened, aired and thoroughly cleaned. She wanted the house to be as glorious as possible when Careen and Noah were married as the whole county would be invited to witness the nuptials.

She found reason after reason to ride into Jonesboro, from ordering silk and taffeta for Careen's dress to commissioning beautifully engraved invitations, but it was all under the guise of checking the telegraph station for any response from Rhett.

On this particular day, she and Prissy were in Jonesboro yet again and she had been disappointed that no response had been sent to her. She was in a foul mood and Prissy had learned long ago that when Scarlett was in a foul mood it was wise to keep a wide berth from her waspish tongue.

"Good heavens Prissy, I don't have all day to wait on you. I have to stop by the Postmaster before I pick up the lace at the mercantile." Scarlett huffed as they walked along the roughhewn sidewalks. "Why do you have to dawdle along like a toad? Pick up your feet and walk."

"Yas'm, Miz Scahlett," she automatically replied.

When they reached the Postmaster she discovered that she had received three pieces of mail, all from Atlanta. She looked over the print on the envelopes and immediately recognized Aunt Pittypat's neat scrawl on one and Ashley's on the other. The last one was from Uncle Henry's office. She lifted Ashley's letter and stared down at the thick envelope with a sense of dread mixed with anticipation, realizing that at one time a letter from Ashley would have thrilled her beyond words. She had always admired his bold strokes and precise print but now looking down on it, she didn't find it as enthralling as she once did.

"Who's dey frum?" Prissy asked behind her.

Scowling, Scarlett turned to her. "Never you mind. Go over there and wait for me," she said pointing to stool in front of the Postmasters office. Moving to the opposite side, she sat on a long bench and tore open the letter and slid it out of the envelope, scanning the contents as she read.

Dearest Scarlett,

How sad that I find myself sitting here wishing with all of my heart that the events of the last few months had never occurred. I miss Melanie more than I can begin to describe to you. This empty feeling never seems to disappear and no matter what I do or where I go, I cannot escape it. I only have my memories now, but memories are fragile and easily distorted when the reality of my surrounding barge in unwanted. I am a man haunted by what I no longer have nor will ever have again.

I know you must be grieving as well, for your loss is greater than my own. At least I have still Beau, who is so much like Melly to me. I still think of your Bonnie fondly and will always miss her. Melanie loved children and she loved Bonnie as well. She always did want a daughter to pamper like you did Bonnie, but the fates decided that it was not to be.

With that being said, I am writing this letter to tell you that I can no longer stay in Atlanta where the memories are too hard to bear. I hear her laughter in the halls and sense her touch everywhere I am in this house. I can no longer bear it, Scarlett. I am selling the mill, taking Beau and moving to Virginia to be with my mother's family. It will be a fresh start for me and one I hope will allow me to move on with my life.

I wish to make a stop at Tara and visit with you and the family, perhaps to even say goodbye to friends I still have there and of course, to say goodbye to Twelve Oaks, not as it is, but as it once was when it was the home of my childhood.

I know you understand how I feel as Tara means as much to you if not more. You once told me that your father gave you the love of the land and I know that you draw your strength from the red earth of Tara, I know it to be true. It's a part of you and you of it, you shall ever be one with each other.

You will always be special to me, Scarlett. You are still as lovely and beautiful as you were that day long ago at Twelve Oaks when you collected every heart of every man at the Barbeque. You will always be that girl to me, so full of spirit and hopes and dreams. I wish you much happiness, my dear.

Yours Truly,

Ashley

Scarlett lowered the letter and shook her head. Poor Ashley, she thought. He sounded so sad and so empty without Melly. But, as usual he was caught up in the past, always looking back and never looking forward. She realized in that moment that she had never understood him and she never would. He was man who was more comfortable in his dreams of the past while she was a woman who saw the future as something to grab onto and make your own.

Perhaps this move to Virginia was just the thing he needed. At least he was no longer dependant on her, but it was a bitter admission that had to make to herself that Ashley's dependence on her was of her own doing. She had done everything in her power to keep him near her all of these years. Now, she was glad he was leaving and finding a life of his own. She had kept her promise to Melly to take care of him. At least financially, he would never do without anything for a very long time.

With a sigh, she set the letter aside and lifted the other two envelopes. She wasn't in the mood to read Aunt Pitty's rambling letters, they were always full of ridiculous things that didn't matter to anyone but Aunt Pitty. She decided to open Uncle Henry's as it was from his law office. It was probably the papers for the release of the mill to Ashley.

Tearing it open, she pulled the sheets out. As she began to scan the letter, her heart sped up. Her mind was having trouble comprehending what she was reading. She gripped the sheets tightly to keep her hands from trembling. She read it over again and then lifted it to look at the document behind it.

No, her mind screamed. This couldn't be, this couldn't be, she repeated over and over again. "Rhett," she breathed his name as she looked the papers over again. Uncle Henry had tried to soften the blow with his kind and comforting words, but nothing could soften the pain of reading that Rhett wanted a divorce. Divorce… the word rang in her ears. No, no, no, she shook her head, not divorce, Rhett, not that.

A thousand thoughts flew through her mind. Had he received her telegram and then sent these papers to Uncle Henry anyway? That thought hurt too much to think about. Perhaps those letters had been sent before he received the telegram and saw just how much she needed him. Was there still hope? Was there still a chance that this was a terrible mistake?

"Miz Scahlett, I's tired of sittin' on this stool," Prissy's slow drawl broke through her tormented senses. "I's tired and I's gettin' hungry, too. When can we's go home?"

Scarlett pressed her fingers to her forehead. She had to get control of herself. She couldn't let the others see how upset she was. Placing the letters back in their perspective envelopes, she stood and smoothed down her dress. She would have to give this more thought when she was at home and alone. She beckoned Prissy to follow her, trying desperately hard to keep her appearance as neutral as possible as she walked down the narrow sidewalk.

"Well, if it ain't Mrs. Butler," a flat, nasally voice said behind her. Turning absently to see who had called her name, she stopped short when she saw Jonas Wilkerson standing on the street, one arrogant, booted foot propped up on the sidewalk in a leisurely stance.

"Jonas Wilkerson," she said, contempt lining her voice as she spoke. "How dare you to speak to me."

A smirk came across his pasty face. "Why, is that anyway to greet family? And, we are family now."

"We are nothing of the sort. Now, leave me alone before I have you arrested for harassment."

"My, my, my, still just as uppity as you ever were, ain't ya? You were always the one who was staring down your pretty nose at me, like I wasn't ever good enough. Well, I'm good enough now, ain't I?" he drawled sarcastically. "After all, I'm married to your sister."

"Ha!" Scarlett snorted before she could catch herself. "That's nothing I'd go bragging about too loudly. Seems to me you're getting exactly what you deserve by being tied to her."

"She serves my purpose the same as I serve hers," he replied cryptically. "It was a mutual union that was beneficial to both of us. You see, she gets the benefit of spending my money anyway she chooses and I get the benefit of becoming a true landowner… land that I once worked will now work for me."

Scarlett paled slightly. She knew exactly what Jonas was referring to and it was exactly what she had feared. "That will never happen," she spat angrily.

"But, it already has," he smiled haughtily. "What belongs to my wife, belongs to me."

"Name your price then," she flung at him. "All you people have your price, so name yours. What do you want for your share?"

Jonas lifted his head, glaring at her contemptuously. "There is no price, madam. I wouldn't sell for any amount of money because this is not about money. It's about justice."

"Justice?" she bit out. "What are talking about? What justice? The only thing we ever did to you was fire you and that was deserved. You've managed to do well for yourself and now you've tied to yourself to my sister, isn't that enough?"

"It will be enough when I own Tara lock, stock and barrel," he nearly snarled. "I've waited a long time for my chance and now I have it. I couldn't buy you out even when you were at your lowest, but marrying Suellen gives me rights, legal rights. You can't buy me off, not now and not ever. Now, if you'll excuse me I have business to tend to."

Scarlett gripped her fists at her side as he walked away from her. Oh! But that man was worse than Satan himself and twice as nasty. He had always wanted Tara for his own and marrying her sister had given it to him on a silver platter. God's Nightgown, but she needed Rhett more than ever! He couldn't divorce now, not when she needed him.

"That shore is a wicked, wicked man," Prissy said behind her, her voice high with disapproval.

"Wicked doesn't begin to describe him," Scarlett muttered darkly and beckoned Prissy to follow her. Once they reached her carriage, they returned back to Tara with her goods. After giving them to Careen, she quietly made her way to her room and unfolded the letter from Uncle Henry, reading it again. Small tears formed in her eyes as she looked over the document.

Rhett, Rhett, she cried, how can I let you go? How can I when I love you so much? I know you don't believe me, but I do. I'm no longer that foolish girl that didn't know what she wanted. I feel so lost without you and I know you would laugh at that, but if you would give me but another chance to prove it, you would never doubt my sincerity again.

It was then that Scarlett realized what she had to do. If she had not heard from Rhett by the end of the month, she really had no choice but to go to him. She had family in Charleston, too. Aunt Pauline and Aunt Eulalie would be more than happy to see her and she could stay with them while she tried to work things out with him. But, it was her hope and prayer that he would come to her and together they could bring down Jonas and his threats once and for all.