Darcy Lewis - Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. or How I got a High Paying Government Job without even Trying
Chapter 1: The Beginning or How not to React to a Prophecy
Professor Albus Dumbledore, Sybill Trelawney and Severus Snape walked into a pub. What resulted was arguably the least funny joke in the history of the universe. A joke that started when Sybill Trelawney, in a display of startling unprofessionalism, got so drunk she passed out midway through a job interview and started spouting nonsense, nonsense that turned out to be a prophecy.
The joke unfortunately continued, when in an incredible display of Slytherin cunning Severus Snape chose to eavesdrop on the aforementioned job interview, not through one of the doubtless myriad amount of spells invented for that very purpose, but rather through quite literally pressing his ear to the door, leaving him in plain view of anyone who so much as glanced his way, allowing him to over hear part of the prophecy before being noticed. The joke continued apace, when Professor Albus Dumbledore (apparently one of the wisest and most powerful wizards alive) decided not to do the smart thing and Obliviate Severus Snape of the knowledge that could lead to the defeat of the Dark Lord Voldemort, but to let him walk away scot free. No doubt he then returned to the school and gave an obscene amount of points to a random student starting his long future of poor decisions and making a mockery of the house cup.
The joke reached it's decidedly unfunny punchline when Severus Snape ran to his lord and saviour the Dark Lord Voldemort (who needless to say was probably in the process of torturing some small, fluffy animal) and told him the half of the Prophecy he had heard. Voldemort, being the intelligent, thoughtful Dark Lord he is, chose to act on the small amount of information he had leading to his temporary downfall, and the depressing childhood of Darcy Rose Potter.
Now, if you ever find yourself at a point in life where your future is the subject of a prophecy, there are three very important questions you need to ask yourself before you act on it. Sadly for Darcy Rose Potter, Voldermort did not any of these questions.
Firstly, do you have the entire prophecy? If your answer is yes, move on to the second point. If no, then what ever you do, do not act on the part of the prophecy you do have. If you act on a prophecy without knowing its entirety, you are almost certain to screw yourself over, and screw yourself over hard. Unfortunately for Darcy Rose Potter, Voldermort did not have the entire prophecy.
Secondly, is the prophecy precise? Prophecies are finicky things open to all manner of interpretation. So unless the prophecy quite literally says "[Your Name Here] of [Your Address Here], will kill [Your Enemies Name Here] of [Your Enemies Address Here], at [Specific Time and Date Here]" or something else equally literal, it's always best to assume the prophecy isn't referring to you. It is especially important to remember this when the prophecy uses such imprecise titles as "Dark Lord" and only gives you a time frame as open to interpretation as "born as the seventh month dies". Really, when you think about it, this is just incredibly unhelpful. It doesn't state which dark lord it refers to, and it's not exactly difficult to pick up the title, just kill a few people, gather a few followers and think up a dramatic alias, and boom you're a dark lord. After all, with the size of the world and the amount of people in it, there are bound to be a couple other aspiring dark lords running about. As far as the "seventh month dies" part, that's equally as unhelpful. The seventh month by what calendar? There are dozens of calendars still in use the world over and let's not even get started on the number of calendars that have died out over the years. Without specifying which calendar the prophecy refers to, any month could be the seventh month. Unfortunately for Darcy Rose Potter, the prophecy was not precise.
Thirdly, will acting on the prophecy aid you? Prophecies can predict a lot of things. They can predict a person's victory or defeat. Whether they will live or die. Whether that will make money or lose money. However, regardless of what a prophecy predicts, it will only occur if the prophecy is acted upon. After all, there are thousands and thousands of prophecies stored in the basement of the Ministry of Magic, yet of them only a scant few have actually come true. This is because a prophecy is not a set in stone, map to the future, but rather a vague guideline to a specific possibility of the future. When thinking of a prophecy it helps to the think of the old philosophical question "If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound?" Or in more precise terms "If a prophecy is made and no one is around to act on it, does it come true?" The answer to both questions is a resounding maybe. In the end a prophecy should only be acted upon if the predicted outcome is favourable for the person or persons involved in it.
Unfortunately for Darcy Rose Potter, Voldermort added yet another point to his list of terrible life choices (Choices that included, releasing a basilisk, making horcuxes, and getting involved in this whole dark lord business to begin with) by acting on an incomplete and imprecise prophecy.
On the thirty-first of October, 1981, the self styled Dark Lord Voldemort, acting on information from Severus Snape and Peter Pettigrew, made his way to the Potter house in Godric's Hollow. There he killed James and Lily Potter, before turning his wand on Darcy Rose Potter. His attempt to kill her backfired however due to the protections set in place by Lily Potter, causing the destruction of his body, and the creation of a horcrux inside Darcy Rose Potter. As the Killing Curse backfired on Lord Voldemort, his last coherent thought, was that he really should have gone in to law, like his career advisor at Hogwarts suggested.
Several hours after Lord Voldemort's unannounced and rather rude visit to the Potter house, the wreckage was visited by Hagrid, groundskeeper and Keeper of the Keys at Hogwarts, and by Sirius Black, godfather to the newly orphaned Darcy Rose Potter. In what would be the first of a great many terrible decisions made with regards to her care by both her legally and illegally appointed guardians, Sirius Black gave her to Hagrid to be taken to Dumbledore while he bravely ignored his duty to his goddaughter and went off in search of revenge against the traitor Peter Pettigrew, a course of action that led to Sirius Black spending twelve years in the prison of Azkaban, and to Peter Pettigrew spending twelve years as a rat belonging to the Weasley family (Darcy would later struggle to decide which was the worse fate).
Hagrid, having been given care of Darcy Rose Potter by Sirius Black, made what would come to be the second of a great many terrible decisions made with regards to her care by both her legally and illegally appointed guardians, in deciding the best way to deliver her to the care of Albus Dumbledore was through the an unsecured ride in Sirius Black's flying motorcycle. At night. In winter.
Upon arriving in Little Whinging, Hagrid met Dumbledore and handed little Darcy Rose Potter into his care. Dumbledore proceeded to make the third in a long list of terrible decisions made with regards to her care by both her legally and illegally appointed guardians, by choosing to leave her on the doorstep of number 4 Privet Drive. A house belonging to Darcy Rose Potter's uncle and aunt, Vernon and Petunia Dursley, as well as her cousin Dudley Dursley. It doesn't need to be said that he left her there in the middle of the night, in winter, a decision that can be thought of as nothing but an incredible act of neglect.
The next morning, Petunia Dursley would find young Darcy, and thus would begin a long and harsh childhood for Darcy. A childhood that would however, regardless of hardships, teach her many valuable lessons, that would help her survive the years to come.