Authors Note: And, here is 1x08, enjoy!
Disclaimer: I own NOTHING; no script from the show, or storylines but the ones that I fix, and no characters except the Bing kids.
November 1994.
[Scene: The Bings apartment. It's just Mondler, their kids and Joey there]
Monica: I'm so uncomfortable(Sets the table for dinner)
Chandler: Aww Baby. I'm so sorry, I love you(Kisses her lips softly and her large belly where he can feel their fourth child and second son kick under his lips)
Karen: I wish you were having another girl.
The Geller genetics combined with the Bing genetics, worked pretty well together leading to their kids looking gorgeous.
Monica: Don't say that, you are gonna love having another brother soon. Sweetie.
Karen: No Mom. I hate Daniel, he's mean(Frowns)
Daniel:(In the bathroom) And I hate you too.
Sophie:(Wears her pink ballerina outfit, enters the living room too) Yeah Mom why do you have to have another boy?
Joey: Ah, I remember this is how I acted when I found out Dina was a girl.
(Ross, Rachel and Phoebe enter. Phoebe is on the phone while Ross is holding a box of Chinese food in his hand)
Monica: You guys are home early, what's up with that?
Ross: Phoebe got us thrown out of the movies. She was on the phone talking to Mike in Paris(yeah the one on the show and she met him in chapter four). Well I brought home Chinese food.
Phoebe: I had to talk loud, the movie was loud!
Joey: I can talk in Paris, just gotta go to Paris.
[TIME LAPSE: The gang and kids were eating their dinner]
(The phone rings and Monica picks it up)
Monica(On the phone): Hi Daddy... Nana's in the hospital...Me, Ross and Chandler will there right away.
(Monica's just about to hang up the phone but then felt a hard kick. She then put down the phone)
Monica: It's Nana...she's in the hospital.
(Ross looks up from his food with a look of sadness and disbelief on his face)
Rachel: We can watch the kids for you guys.
(TIME LAPSE: Ross, Chandler, Monica, Jack & Judy are in the hospital waiting for the nurse to let them see Nana)
The Doctor: Only two at a time can see her.
In the room, the Geller siblings enter.
Ross: She looks so small.
Monica: I know. Bye Nana...(Bends down as much as her large belly allows her too, and kisses her grandmothers forehead)
Ross:I love you Nana(Attempts to kiss her forehead also)
Then Nana stirs a bit as Ross tries to kiss her forehead.
Ross: Oh my god!
Monica(By the door): Ross come quick.
They then run out of the room- or in Monics's case, waddles out.
The Geller parents: What just happened?
Ross: It's Nana, she's risen from dead.
Monica is still freaking out and Baby Boy Bing started kicking his mother's ribcage.
Chandler held his pregnant wife stroking her medium length raven black hair. And looked in her eyes, as blue as an ocean.
-Back in the hospital room-
The doctor: This has never happened before!
[TIME LAPSE: At the Bings and Rachel's apartment)
Phoebe: So what happened?
Chandler: Me and Mon need a moment with the kids. Can you guys go right now?
Joey: Okay suit yourself(Him, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe go to apartment #19)
Daniel: Mommy, why you are so big?
Monica: Because I'm having a baby soon. Son(Smiles and ruffles their son's sandy brown hair)
Chandler: Kids, remember when Nana got sent to a nursing home a few months ago?(They nod). Well tonight she's passed on which is why me, your mother and Uncle Ross went to the hospital with your mom's parents.
[TIME LAPSE: The next morning, at the Bings and Rachel's apartment Monica is discussing coffins with her dad.]
Mr. Geller: I was just thinking. When my time comes-
Monica: Dad!
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Monica: You what?
Mr. Geller: I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.
Monica: Define fun.
Mr. Geller: C'mon, you'll make a day of it! You'll rent a boat, pack a lunch...
Monica: ...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.
Mr. Geller: Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says 'Jack Geller, so predictable'. Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say 'Buried at sea! Huh!'.
Monica: That's probably what they'll say.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
[Scene: Nana's house, Ross, Mrs. Geller and Aunt Lillian are going through clothes.]
Ross: I thought it was gonna be a closed casket.
Mrs. Geller: Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice!
(They open a cupboard which, amongst other things, contains a chest of drawers)
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
Ross: (sarcastic) I don't see why not.
(He tries pushing against the chest of drawers. Then he opens one of the drawers and climbs into the closet using that; he falls behind the chest of drawers with a shout.)
Ross: Here's my retainer!
[Scene: At the Bings and Rachel's apartment.]
Jack: Sweetie, I just want you to know that your mother and I are really proud of you and Chandler for having such a great family together.
Monica: Thanks, Daddy. I know you two are.
Jack: And I really can't wait for this new Baby Bing to be here soon; I love it when Judy and I become grandparents.
Monica: l know, neither can I. Personally, I hope this one turns out to be a boy; Daniel's always talking about wanting a brother to play around with and honestly, I think he could really use one.(Pats her large belly)
Jack: I agree. It'd be good for the boy's masculinity to have a brother to grow up as opposed to just having sisters. Plus, having two boys and two girls really balances things out.
Monica: Yeah, that's one of the other reasons why I hope it's a boy too.
[Scene: Nana's Bedroom, Ross is holding a dress out from inside the closet.]
Ross: (holding a dress out from inside the closet) This one?
Aunt Lillian: No.
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Aunt Lillian: You know, whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one.
Mrs. Geller: You're right. We'll go with the burgundy.
Ross: Oh! A fine choice. I'm coming out. (Starts to climb over the furniture)
Aunt Lillian: Wait! We need shoes!
(Ross falls back inside)
Ross: Okay. Um, how about these? (Holds out a pair)
Mrs. Geller: That's really a day shoe.
Ross: And where she's going everyone else will be dressier?
Aunt Lillian: Could we see something in a slimmer heel?
Ross: (forages around) Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. I can show you something in a silver that may work.
Aunt Lillian: No, it really should be burgundy.
Mrs. Geller: Mm. Unless we go with a different dress?
Ross: No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
(He finds a shoebox (out of shot), pulls it down and opens it. It is full of Sweet 'n' Lo's.)
Ross: Oh my God..
Mrs. Geller: Is everything all right, dear?
Ross: Yeah, just... just Nana stuff.
(He reaches up higher and knocks down another shoebox lid.Sweet 'n' Lo's rain down on him)
[The Bings and Rachel's. Monica and Mr. Geller are looking at Casket Catalogs in the kitchen.]
Monica: Dad, let's just make a decision.
Mr. Geller: You're right. This is crazy. It's just going into the ground. We should just get the most basic thing.
Monica: Great! (looking at a catalog) That would be the non-protective corrugate fiberboard with white laminate. And we can't bury Nana in dresser drawer from Ikea.
Mr. Geller: See, this is why your mother buys all my clothes. I hate to shop. I hate it!
Monica: Dad, don't you think this might be more about the fact that...once you make the decision, it's like acknowledging Nana's actually gone?
Mr. Geller: No, I really hate to shop.
[Scene: The Bings and Rachel's, Chandler , Monica, Sophie, Daniel, Karen and Rachel are preparing to leave for the funeral.]
Ross: (entering) How we doing, you guys ready?
Monica: Mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Did you know my ears are not my best feature?
Ross: Some days it's all I can think about.
Phoebe: (entering) Hi, sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my bearings.
Rachel: Oh, you-you mean your earrings?
Phoebe: What'd I say?
Joey: (entering) Morning. We ready to go?
Chandler: Well, don't we look nice all dressed up?...It's stuff like that, isn't it?
(They all leave.)
(I'm not going to write about the grave falling. It's Joey who falls down the open grave for long story short)
[Scene: At the Geller home in Long Island, Rachel's squatting over Joey, checking to see if he's injured]
Rachel: "Okay, sweetie, don't worry, I'm just checking to see if the muscle's in spasm...huh.
Joey: What, what is it?
Rachel: You missed a belt loop.
Joey: Oh! No-n-
Rachel: Okay, it's in spasm.
(Then Ross appears with a bottle of pills)
Ross: Here, buddy, my mom suggested you take these; she took 'em when she had her golfing accident.
Later on when Joey's stoned on the pills-
Rachel: Hey, look who's up! How do you feel?
Joey: I feel great. I feel- great, I fleel great.
Monica: Wow, those pills really worked, huh?
Joey: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love Monica... (he hugs her) I love Rach... (he kisses her on the nose)
Rachel: Ooh! That's so nice...
slurred by Joey ...Chandler! Ross!
(spoken by Chandler Hey, buddy. How ya doin'?
Ross: Yeah, ya feelin' all right?
Joey: I'm grrreat. I love you guys. (he hugs them simultaneously) And listen, guys, if you wanna bang Monica and Rachel's brains out and give 'em all the kids they want, just do it. Doesn't matter to me.
(He leaves the two men and their respective lovers gaping at him in embarrassment. Then he approaches Phoebe, who's sitting on the nice sofa.)
Joey: Phoebe. Phoebe Phoebe. (he sits down beside her) I love you the most.
(spoken by Phoebe) Oh, Joey, I love you the most too. (she's just humoring him)
(slurred by Joey) No, no, I mean I realllllly love you.
(spoken by Phoebe) And I reallllly love you. (still humoring him)
(slurred by Joey) Oh.. you don't get it! (he passes out and slumps across her)
[Scene: Mondler are away from the guests]
Chandler: Mon, you make me so happy and given me three kids with another on the way. I'm so in love with you.
Monica: And I'm so in love with you too.
(He placed his hand gently on her large belly and kissed her. Then kissed her arm.)
Ross: Eww, guys...cut it out! We've got kids here.
Rachel: And they are so in love!
Sophie/Karen/Daniel: OMG eww, Mom and Dad!
(Cut to Ross watching TV in the corner. He makes an extravagant gesture of disappointment.)
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there Son?
Ross: (hides the TV, but he still has an earphone) Just a, uh... hearing disability Dad.
Mr. Geller: What's the score?
Ross: Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
(Time lapse. A large crowd of men are now watching the game)
Phoebe: (still trapped under Joey) Rach, could you maybe hand me a cracker?
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Monica: Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.
Mrs. Geller: No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?', I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
Monica(Chuckling): That sounds like Nana.
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Monica: ...I can imagine.
Mrs. Geller: I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be the positive, life-affirming person that she is.
Monica: That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?
Mrs. Geller: Tell her what?
Monica: How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example.
Mrs. Geller: I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
Monica: Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth?
Mrs. Geller: ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it's nicer when people just get along.
Monica: Huh.
Mrs. Geller: More iced tea, dear?
Monica: Oh, I think so. I'm one uncomfortable eight month pregnant woman.
Mrs. Geller: (reaches out to fiddle with Monica's hair again, and realizes) Those earrings look really lovely on you.
Monica: Thank you. They're yours.
Mrs. Geller: Actually they were Nana's.
(There is a cry of disappointment from the crowd of men.)
Mr. Geller: Now I'm depressed! ...(To everyone) Even more than I was.
Mrs. Geller: Sweetie, even though we don't get along you are my baby. And me and your father are so proud of how far you and Chandler have come; three grandbabies and another one coming in a month.
Monica: I know that Mom(Flashed a small smile)
Mrs. Geller: Only 6 more weeks, how are you feeling?
Monica: Uncomfterable, he kicks a lot when I try to sleep.(Rubs her large belly)
Mrs Geller: Soon he'll be out, and you & Chandler will have another son. Another handsome baby boy.
Monica: I know!
ENDING CREDITS
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is looking at old photos.]
Monica: Oh look this is my first grade picture. Oh, please ignore the "Dy-no-mite!" t-shirt.
Rachel: Ha-haa. Hey, who's this little naked guy?
Ross: That little naked guy would be me.
Rachel: Aww, look at the little thing.
Ross: Yes, yes, fine, that is my p...(Trails off so that the kids don't hear). Can we be grown-ups now?
Chandler: Who are those people?
Ross: Got me.
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
Monica: Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?
Ross: Looks like a fun gang. (They all look at each other and smile)
Joey: Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
Ross: (looking) Nono, that would be me again. I'm, uh, just trying something.
Phoebe: Whose these toddlers?
Monica: That's Karen and Daniel on their first birthday.
Rachel: Karen looks just like you Mon.
Joey: And Daniel looks like you Chandler.
Authors Note: This took me a long time to do. Well I've got a week off from school, so goodbye for right now!