Authors Note: Here's 1x12(filler scene, number two), enjoy!
Disclaimer: I own NOTHING; no script from the show, or storylines but the ones that I fix, and no characters except the Bing kids.
Two days later.
December 6, 1994
[SCENE: The Bings were at the food store. Monica and Daniel are looking at hygiene products while Chandler, Sophie and Karen are looking in the snack aisle for food, for Monica's baby shower that on Saturday ]
Daniel: Mommy, why are we looking at deodorant?
Monica: I'm nine months pregnant, I sweat a lot.
Daniel: Mommy, you are really fat.
Monica: Daniel! (Tone slightly cold)
[SCENE: Chandler, Sophie & Karen were in the vegetable section of the food store.]
Chandler:(Looking over at the list of food in his hand) Hmm, well the list your mom wrote out, says asparagus and mushrooms but that is disgustingly gross. Let's get ice cream and candy.
Sophie: Yay Daddy!(Hugs her father)
Karen(Held up a package of cookies): Daddy, can we get this?
Chandler: No, your mom makes them at home. Let's go look for her and Daniel.
[Scene: The Bings meet up near the frozen foods section]
Monica: Chandler, your son just called me 'fat' again.
Chandler: Daniel! What the hell did I say about calling your mom fat? She's pregnant with your brother.
Daniel: Sorry...
Monica: Baby's using my bladder as a chew toy, I need to go to the bathroom. Wait for me.
(Monica goes to the bathroom. Leaving Chandler and the kids looking sheepish)
[SCENE: The Bings and Rachel's apartment when they come back home]
(Daniel goes into his room right away)
Ross: What's wrong with Daniel?
Chandler: He's pissed off at us because he called Mon 'fat' at the food store.
Rachel: Woah, poor kid.
Chandler: He deserves it, since he called her that for the 4th time this week.
Ross: Before you knocked up my sister on Thanksgiving 1988, I never thought you would be like this.
Phoebe: Some people change, Ross.
(TIME LAPSE: That saturday)
[Scene: Joey's Apartment, Joey is reading a script as Ross and Chandler enter carrying a basketball. Daniel is with them: sucking on a lollipop]
Chandler: Hey Joe! You wanna shoot some hoops? (To Ross) And for the record, I'm not covering the tall one this time.
Ross: Fine. But she's not that tall.
Joey: Oh no, I can't go. I'm practicing; I got an audition to be the host of a new game show.
Ross: Oh cool!
Chandler: That's great.
Joey: Yeah-yeah, and if I get it, by day I'll be Batman from 'Batman Forever', but by night I'll be (In an announcer's voice) Joey Trrrribbiani!
Chandler: You'll be perfect for this! That's already your name!
Joey: I know, I know. And it would be so great if I got this, because you never know what could happen to you on a soap, but I could be a game show host forever, like, that Bob Barker guy. He's been doing The Price Is Right for 75 years!
Chandler: I bet the ratings weren't good for the first 25, y'know, before there was television.
Joey: Yeah. But the problem, this game is really complicated.
Ross: Oh come on. You said the same thing about "Hungry Hungry Hippos", and last week you beat Karen.
Joey: Yeah, I have to be honest with you guys. He kinda let me the audition's in a couple hours and I don't even understand the game.
Chandler: Karen's strong and competitive like Monica. Every time I look at Karen: I see Mon in her but with my version of the blue eyes...
Ross: Well do you want some help?
Joey: Oh really? That'd be great! You guys can be the contestants!
Ross: Awesome!
Chandler: Okay, I guess we can lose to junior high girls some other time.
Joey: (announcer voice) All right! Let's play Bamboozled!
Chandler: Bamboozled?
Joey: Yeah, isn't that a cool name?
Ross: (simultaneously with Chandler) Yeah!
Chandler: (simultaneously with Ross) No!
Joey: All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself Ross?
Ross: Well uh, I-I'm a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have an unborn son Uh, hi unborn son! (Waves.) And uh…
Joey: I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?
Chandler: Well Joey, I'm a headhunter. I hook up out of work Soviet scientists with rogue third-world nations. Hi Rasputin! (Waves.)Just kidding, I'm a data processor and I'm married to Ross's sister Monica: we have two girls and one boy, with another boy who's coming into the world in three weeks.
Joey: Excellent! Let's play Bamboozled! Chandler, you'll go first. What is the capital of Columbia?
Chandler: Bogota.
Joey: It's Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
Chandler: What does a Wicked Wango card do?
Joey: I should know that. Let's see, just one moment please. Umm, here we are, a Wicked Wango card determines whether you go higher or lower.
Chandler: Higher or lower than what?
Joey: This is embarrassing. (Looks it up.)
Chandler: (To Ross) Can you believe how lame this is?
Ross: I'm sorry, I don't believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other.
SCENE: The Bings and Rachel's. Monica's baby shower is underway. Rachel and Phoebe are working in the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Oh, I told the stripper to be here at five. That's good right?
Rachel: You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
Phoebe: What? He's gonna be dressed as a baby! (Mrs. Geller enters.) Oh hi Mrs. Geller!
Rachel: Hi!
Phoebe: I'm so glad you could make it.
Rachel: Yes, thank you so much. And again, we're so sorry. We could not feel worse about it.
Mrs. Geller: How could I miss my little girl's baby shower? There's my little girl. (Goes over to Monica.)
Rachel: She's still mad.
Phoebe: Yeah I know. Isn't it great? One less person we have to make small talk with.
Guest: (To Phoebe) Hey, how are you?
Phoebe: Yeah, uhuh, okay, uhuh.
[Cut to Monica and Mrs. Geller]
Mrs. Geller: Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school! If I didn't know better I'd say you were a chubby wubby in trouble. Come on, let's get some tea.
Monica: Okay. (Mrs. Geller helps her up and they walk over and get some tea.)
Mrs. Geller: Oh my look at that. Only three weeks to go, are you and Chandler excited for the birth of the new Baby Bing.
Monica: Very much so.
Mrs. Geller: I can tell, where's Ross, Chandler and the kids?
Monica: Well, Ross, Chandler & Daniel are across the hall at Joey's place and Sophie and Karen are in their bedrooms.
(Monica opens the door to Sophie's bedroom)
Monica(To Sophie): Your grandmother is here.
Sophie: Ugh(Get's up going into the famous purple living room)
[SCENE: Joey's place. Chandler, Joey, and Ross are playing Bamboozled while Daniel patiently watches in]
Chandler: I'm gonna check on Mon.
Joey: Can't you continue playing?
Chandler: Dude, Monica's pregnant. I need to make sure she and our baby boy are ok. I'll be back in a few.
Ross: Okay.
Joey: Come on Dude, you knocked her up before this.
[SCENE: The Bings and Rachel's apartment]
Monica: I'm tired of being pregnant.
(Chandler's arms wrap around her)
Monica: What're you doing HubbyKins?
Chandler: Making sure you two are ok.
(He kisses up her arm)
Monica: I love you Mon Cherie.
Chandler: And I love you too, Cara Mia.
(Chandler continues kissing up Monica's arm then he goes back across the hall.)
[Scene: Joey's Apartment, the guys are still playing Bamboozled.]
Joey: All right Ross you're in the lead, would you like to take another question or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?
Ross: The wheel has not been my friend tonight Joey. Uh, I'll take another question.
Joey: Okay, this is gonna be tough. Hold your breath.
Ross: It's okay, I'm ready.
Joey: No dude, you gotta hold your breath until you're ready to answer the question. It's part of the game.
Chandler: This is ridiculous, he's not gonna hold his breath… (Ross cuts him off by taking a deep breath and holding it.)
Joey: Okay, what do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia, Tris…Holy cow, that's a big word. Trisc… Seriously look at this thing. Chandler, how do you say that?
Chandler: Let me see that.
Joey: This one right here. (Ross whines.)
Chandler: Triscadecaphobia.
Ross: (exhaling) The fear of Triskets!
Joey: No! No, fear of the number 13.
Chandler: Fear of Triskets?(Plays with his wedding band)
Ross: It's possible, they have really sharp edges.
Joey: All right Chandler, you're up.
Ross: Wait a minute, I-I believe I'm entitled to use my Angel Pass for a free turn?
Joey: Yes, yes. But you can only use it once, so choose wisely.
Ross: Hmm, this is tricky. I mean, I am in the lead, but I would love another shot at the Golden Monkey.
Chandler: This game makes no sense!
Ross: Y'know what? You're just upset because you're losing.
Chandler: Oh come on Ross, I think we're all losers here.
Ross: I would like to hang on to my Angel Pass, please.
Joey: All right. Chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a Google card.
Chandler: Let me think. Let me think—Oh! I don't care.
Joey: You-you must choose Mr. Bing.
Chandler: Either, it makes no difference.
Joey: Choose, you jackass!
Chandler: I'll take a card.
Joey: Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Ross' points!
Ross: What?!
Chandler: This game is kinda fun.
Ross: (To Chandler) You don't think it's a little crazy that you get all my points just 'cause you…
Chandler: I don't think the contestants are supposed to speak to each other.
Ross: Shut up, Dude! You got Monica pregnant on Thanksgiving '88!
Chandler: If you want, I can give you all the details of how we conceived Sophie.
Ross: Eww, dude, no!
Chandler: Haha, Dino Dork.
ENDING CREDITS
[Mondler's bedroom]
Monica: I can't wait for this pregnancy to be over soon.
Chandler: I know Cara Mia. Can you believe in just a little over three weeks, we are gonna have another baby?(Placed his hand gently on her large belly)
Monica: Yeah. And we'll be getting up at 3am again and do the feedings. You'll have to change his diaper.
Chandler: Oh please Mon, don't tell me I need to change his diaper.
Monica: Gotcha!
(He kissed her and they fell asleep in each others arms)
Authors Note: Good night guys!