Harry stood staring out into the nothingness around him, his eyes weren't really focused on the Hogwarts grounds or the stars above just off into his own brain. After Dumbledore's death, the whole summer fiasco with trying to keep him inside Grimwauld Place, which only served to piss him royally off and then returning to find Draco Malfoy still at school with them. Well it was almost too much for him. Draco begged Headmistress McGonagall for protection. She had granted him sanctuary if begrudgingly. He was placed in a private dorm room for the entire summer at Hogwarts. Everyone else ended up trying to decide on whether to keep the school open or not. Finally it was decided to keep it open, for the sake of keeping hope alive. The numbers of children returning were smaller but in the end, everything was on a wobbly pedestal. They all seemed to be waiting for the slightly strong breeze to come along and knock everything off.
"They're beautiful, aren't they?" Hermione murmured behind him. Harry heaved a great sigh, he never got time alone anymore. At least it was her instead of one of the teachers or Ron. She kept quiet when he needed her to be, never tried to cheer him up or try to be funny to lighten the mood.
"Yeah, cold but beautiful," Harry went back to looking out over those perfect silver stars in the sky.
"I'm surprised some of the Slytherins are still here," Hermione commented after a while.
"We all know Draco Malfoy's deal," Harry grumbled, looking down on his hands.
"I meant Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zabini…Crabbe and Goyle have left. Those two seemed to be glued as permanent body guards to Malfoy now," Hermione explained.
"Yeah, noticed Parkinson's changes?" Harry smirked to himself. Hermione rolled her eyes. Pansy had come back with short tightly curled hair and for some reason her pug face wasn't so dog like…it was almost pretty. And puberty hit her in the most delectable ways. Hermione shook her head.
"Look, Harry it's freezing out here, can we go back to the common room?" Hermione asked, rubbing her arms.
"Yeah, you probably have a lot of Head Girl duties to attend to without babysitting me," Harry turned to her. She looked away, she had pretty dark golden hair that flowed down over her shoulder, she looked very beautiful in a tragic sense.
"Stop playing the pity party card, it gets old," Hermione murmured, Harry crossed his arms.
"Then stop playing the protective older sister. Haven't I proved to everyone already that I can at least walk down the hall without a chaperon?" Harry demanded.
"Then stop this," Hermion suddenly grabbed his arm and slid up his sleeve to reveal long jagged scars running down his arm. White bandages wrapped around his wrist from where they had last caught him.
"Low blow," He pulled his arm away from her and hurriedly slid his clothing down.
"Look, we can argue all night but it won't accomplish anything. Why don't you just come with me to my room? I'll make you some of that jasmine tea that you like so much," Hermione gestured to the door leading down from the Astronomy tower. Harry sighed and stepped past her.
~~~!~~~
Hermione couldn't stop staring at the broken mirror before her. Blood smeared over some of the shattered pieces. Her eyes traveled down onto the blood smeared sink then over to the pile of bloody towels sitting on the counter next to her. She pushed away from the counter and grabbed a roll of bandages, started to wrap up her fingers. She wore a snarl on her face without realizing it. She slammed the door behind her and walked over to her bed. There was a knock and she looked over, hurriedly sitting down.
"Come in," she answered finally. Draco Malfoy slowly cracked the door and put his head through. He was named Head Boy along with her.
"I heard your door slam, are you alright?" He asked, his ice gray eyes roaming over the disorganized room and then over to her. She was hiding her hands in among her bedspread.
"I'm fine, don't worry about me," she said, staring at him until he shrugged and shut the door quietly behind him. He wasn't what she had expected. He was nice and respectful since the beginning of their seventh year. Like at any moment she would suddenly scream at him, blaming him for Dumbledore's death. He would try to blend in with the wallpaper their classes or in the great hall during meals. He had become a completely different person from the one she knew and somehow she felt like this new person was the real him. The Him that lay underneath all the cocky bullshit pureblood masks. This was a boy just as scared, lonely and fucked up as she was.
She rose up from her bed and walked over to her door. She caressed the wood before laying her hand on the shiny silver knob, debating on whether to go out there and talk to him. In the end she turned and went back to her bed. She had homework to do and Harry to check on. It was her night and he had a tendency to roam, even when she brought him back from the Astronomy tower. He had stayed with her, doing an essay for potions before finally calling it a night and walking back to the Gryffindor common room.
Draco stood on the other side of the door. He wanted to walk back in and tell her, he heard her scream, the shattering of glass. Heard her sobs, but he couldn't. There was something dangerous between them, something that undeniably spelt trouble for them both. He didn't want her to start screaming at him and then do something horrible like try and kill him. He was a natural empath so he was adept at feeling emotions from other people, it wasn't just empathy, it was real and a step below telepathy. He always felt this pent up rage within Hermione ever since they got back to school. There was a whole lot of melancholy from Harry Potter but Ron Weasley was the hardest to figure out. He was always a mix of emotions, like the boy walked around being complicated. One day he would be content and happy, the next livid or sad or crazy or hyper…he never stuck with one emotion for long and it drove Draco crazy to even be around the kid. It never used to be this way. Before last year, it was a lot easier to block everyone else out of his head. He was trained to do that but after Dumbledore's death, it was like all his training went out the window. His father had appointed a personal tutor to help him when he was young.
He walked back to his room and closed the door behind him. Hermione was a lot different than he had originally thought. She was so…grown up. Her emotions had the feeling of a much older person; she also protected everyone around her. But her biggest down fall remained her rage, she felt so angry but she never showed it to anyone. It was a carefully controlled mask that he sometimes envied. He fell down onto his bed and put his hands behind his head then stared up at the ceiling. He slowly drifted off to sleep…
Draco looked around the dark, towering trees of the Forbidden Forest, the moon was shining full above him. He walked forward into a clearing, noises drew him forward. He stopped just before entering the clearing and froze when he caught sight of them. A woman with a man on top of her writhed on the soft grass together. They were completely devoid of clothing and their lips locked passionately. The man had black hair that covered his face. He had his hands braced so he wouldn't crush the woman underneath him. The woman slid her leg up and wrapped it around her lover's waist, pulling them flush together. She moaned deeply as they started moving against each other.
"Stop," Draco whispered, suddenly the spell was broken and the two froze. twisting towards him. Draco recognized them. The woman moved out from underneath the other and walked towards him. Her heavy breasts caught his attention as she halted before him.
"Join us Draco, you know you want to," she reached up to caress his face, the man was next to her, an arm wrapped casually around her waist.
"Please," he chimed in, Draco shook his head.
"I'm sorry, Hermione, Harry…I can't," Draco answered them.
Draco gasped awaked, sitting up. Sunlight streamed in through his windows and lit up his room. He shook his head and rubbed at his face. He did not just have a wet dream about those two out of nowhere. What next? A foursome with the golden Trio? Hell no. Draco hopped off his bed and wandered over to his closet. He had neglected to change out of his clothes last night so he grabbed some new clothes and walked over to his bathroom for a shower. They looked like two Greek gods in that moonlit dream, he shook his head again, trying to not think about what he had just experienced but it was so hard to not do so. He turned on the cold water and looked into his mirror at his own face. He looked down on his pale, exposed arms. He was very closely watched over the summer by the people living in Hogwarts but he would sometimes escape down to the lake where no one would know and that is how he got the long thin lines running down the insides of his arms where a Dark Mark should be but only held pale scarred flesh. He turned to the shower and slowly eased himself in.
Ron huddled in the corner of his dorm room, staring down at his toes, they were nice toes, pretty toes. He picked a piece of dirt out from under one and flicked it away before leaning forward and turning a page in his charms textbook. He snapped his eyes up as Neville walked in.
"Are you going to go to bed tonight?" Neville asked without looking at him, stopping in the center of the room.
"I don't feel tired," Ron replied simply, Neville frowned darkly in return.
"You haven't slept in over a week…that's not very healthy," Neville pointed out, finally looking at him.
"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine," Ron said and went back to his textbook.
"Alright…" Neville finally turned to his bed and started getting ready for sleep.
Ron zoned out on the book, he let his eyes fall out of focus and his brain started to wander away to past memories when his best friends and he had so many fun adventures. So many things they had accomplished. Now it seemed as if everything was falling apart. Reality caught up to them in the most unusual ways. They had grown up around constant danger, always battling for their lives or for the lives of everyone they knew. It got to where Ron barely saw his friends as they used to be. Hermione never smiled, Harry flat out scared him and he had the sneaking suspicion that Blaise was trying to make friends with him. Blaise Zabini, the Slytherin, one of Draco Malfoy's best friends. He had tried to wrap his brain around that one when he had discovered it, now he just didn't care. He had more important things to worry about than a rust red head with a sultry look about him. Like his mind which he felt like he was losing more and more of everyday. His family was being killed off and he lived in fear of more letters arriving with the worst news that someone else had died. Things were taking a turn for the worst out in the wizarding world while it seemed like a precarious, maddening peace had settled over Hogwarts. A safety that was shattered for him but it was still calm, like the center of a storm.
"Thought you would still be awake," Harry spoke up, Ron blinked, looking up at the other.
"Hey snappers, how's the deal with the grapes going?' Ron asked, Harry smiled over at the other.
"Fine, how's your homework?" Harry asked. Ever since the summer, Ron couldn't talk normal, he didn't like it.
"Snazzin," He replied and turned another page. At least Harry understood him, most times.
"I'll leave you to it then. Have a good night," Harry murmured and kissed Ron's forehead before getting up and walking over to his bed. Ron felt tears well up in his eyes but he quickly pushed them away, this wasn't the time for theatrics. Or for dwelling on sentimentalities he didn't fully understand.
~~~!~~~
Blaise glanced up as Draco walked into his room and flopped down on the bed.
"I had a dream last night," Draco announced, staring up at the ceiling.
"Did it have a naked hot and bothered couple in it?" Blaise murmured, going back to his homework.
"Actually it did, how did you know?" Draco sat up to look over at his best friend.
"Just a guess," Blaise replied.
"It was Hermione and Harry," Draco said, Blaise frowned, looking over at the other.
"Are you alright? Do you need to go to the Hospital Wing?" Blaise asked, Draco looked over at him, the red head smiled back.
"I don't know why I dreamt that, maybe it's because their emotions have become so clear to me lately. They all seem so wrapped up in their own problems, they don't want to understand anything around them except their own pain," Draco explained, Blaise shrugged.
"They are the most put upon out of everyone here," Blaise pointed out.
"They are also the most sheltered. They are here instead of out there on the front lines, fighting for all wizarding kind against…The Dark Lord," Draco gestured out with his arm dramatically.
"We all made our choices early on. You made yours, I made mine, Harry Potter and company made theirs. You chose the middle ground, the only ground you had really open to you. To survive you couldn't join Him and you can't really join the other side considering you'd instantly have a target plastered on your forehead. I know you want to just shed everything and be normal but we aren't in normal times Draco…we are here and we're making the best of it," Blaise laid it out, Draco sighed and leaned back on the bed again.
"I can only tell you that you're not alone," Blaise sat down next to the platinum blonde, Draco looked over at him.
"Thank you," Draco murmured, smiling slightly, Blaise returned it.
~~~!~~~
Pansy walked down the hall to the library when something caught her eye. She stopped and back tracked, there through the window of a deserted classroom sat Hermione at the teacher's chair, wrapping up her fingers with a long black bandage. She slowly walked over and knocked lightly, Hermione looked up at her, puzzlement flowing over her face. Pansy waved and pointed to the handle, Hermione nodded and Pansy walked in.
"Hey," Pansy breathed, feeling very awkward.
"Hello, what do you want?" Hermione returned to wrapping up her knuckles and fingers.
"How did you get hurt?" Pansy asked, slowly walking towards the other.
"Just an accident, nothing serious," Hermione answered.
"You seem kind of in a bad mood lately, is there anything I could do? Listen maybe?" Pansy asked, sitting down at the desk right in front of the other.
"Like you would understand," Hermione rolled her eyes.
"You could try me…I'm not all that bad of a listener. Contrary to my outward image of Slytherin badass…I'm not so insensitive," she smiled over at her, Hermione returned the smile but looked away as soon as she felt the smile touch her lips.
"Why are you talking to me?" Hermione asked.
"Why not? Things have been changing a lot around here if you haven't noticed. I know I don't know you very well but that can change if you want it to," Pansy offered.
"You're very different from what I imagined you to be," Hermione murmured, looking over at the blonde.
"Well I had a façade to uphold. It's a little different ever since my parents were killed. I don't have very many people lording over me anymore," Pansy explained.
"So all of that before was just an act?" Hermione put away her roll of bandages and cast a spell to hide the ones on her hands.
"Of course," Pansy replied.
"Then how do I know you're not just acting right now? To get information out of me?" Hermione asked, standing up to start gathering her things off the desk and into her bag.
"Because Draco Malfoy didn't kill Dumbledore," Pansy said plainly, Hermione looked up at the girl, she smiled in return. "We may be very mysterious and ambiguous people Ms. Granger but we aren't evil. We'll leave that up to the Dark Lord and his minions. We're just trying to survive in a world where danger crosses our path every day. Slytherins are very good at staying alive and right now I know He would kill us the second he saw us. He knows I refused to come to him when my parents died, refused to take up where they left off. I'm in just as much danger as you are Hermione," Pansy explained.
"How do I know you're not lying?" Hermione asked, frowning. Pansy rolled up her sleeve to reveal a clean arm.
"I'm not a Death Eater and my parents were executed in public," Pansy explained.
"Look, I'm sorry about that but I don't need your help," Hermione started to the door. Suddenly Pansy appeared right in front of her.
"I watch you, you're very easy to watch," Pansy breathed, looking down for a second. "I know you better than you think. You're unhappy and confused. You are also very angry, you are frustrated and you think you're falling into a trap like all the rest of the good side. Hermione, I want to tell you something. You don't have to feel alone because I know you feel that way. I know both Weasley and Potter feel alone but I am talking to you, not them. You are all that matters to me," Pansy reached forward and brushed her knuckles against Hermione's cheek. She was almost three inches taller than Pansy.
"Why…" Hermione trailed off, Pansy gave her a hot grin.
"Because you are gorgeous," Pansy leaned up, pressing her body against Hermione's. Hermione was shocked into silence and felt immobile as Pansy's arms slowly wound their way around her tightly. She then laid her head on Hermione's shoulder and breathed in deeply.
"I just want you, nothing else," Pansy breathed then slowly stepped back, looking up at her. The door opened behind them and Pansy backed out.
"I guess I'll see you later then," Pansy said then closed the door silently behind her.
~~~!~~~
Hermione sat down at the lunch table, Ron appearing soon after. Finally Harry wandered in and sat down on the other side of Hermione. Draco walked past their table and sat down with Blaise trailing after him. Pansy came in and winked at Hermione who blushed and looked away. She took her seat next to Draco with Blaise on the other side of him. They were six people on the verge of graduating from Hogwarts, six ordinary kids who were about to do extraordinary things for a cause they really didn't know anything about but were forced to believe in anyway.
TBC
Author's note: I had a drag in Torture Victim and this came out because I got tired of writing the same pairings all the time. BTW, I changed Blaise. He's my own creation.