Thanks to Cooky and madders10 for reviewing.

Just a warning. There will be some awkwardness, but if you can get past the awkwardness, it's pretty funny.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.

Chapter 99: Birds of a Feather

So far, things are going well.

Do they know?

I don't think so.

And hopefully it will remain that way.

Until it's too late for them to stop us.

…

Ricardo opened his eyes, looking around the room. Roberto and Miguel were slowly coming out of their own trances.

Ricardo looked towards the centre of their circle, where he saw another egg. He took it, and it felt a little colder than Roberto's egg. He supposed that this was Felic's egg.

He blushed when his stomach growled, and he was reminded that none of them had had dinner yet. He supposed that they could have a little break.

Besides, Mahesh and the others were supposed to draw Oliver, James and Tolys to their world, so that they could have their own phoenixes.

"Dinner?" Miguel asked.

"Sim," Ricardo said. "And I suppose we should put this in a fire. Why can't Alida have a fireplace?"

"Does she have a grill?" Roberto asked. "If she's like Anika, she'd enjoy a barbecue."

Ricardo sighed.

"I'll ask her," Ricardo said. "And we should let them know sometime about what we're doing."

"That can wait," Miguel said. "I'm hungry. And I suppose that it would be best to wait until Roberto's egg hatches, at the very least."

"Agreed," the two Brazilians said.

…

Alida looked between the three Egyptians. She was surprised to see Gupta, although she shouldn't really be surprised about Omar. But the one that completely caught her off-guard was the third woman, whom Gupta introduced as 'Ancient Egypt'. It wasn't possible, was it?

And if the other woman's presence wasn't surprising enough, she decided to hug Alida. The only reason why she didn't lash out was because she was so completely off-guard.

"I suppose I owe you for everything you did for Omar," Ancient Egypt, or Khemet, said.

"No problem," Alida said, completely tense. "So, um, from which side of the mirror are you?"

"Both. After death, the two combine into one."

"Uh-huh. If you don't mind my asking, how is this possible?"

"African magic involves some necromancy."

"Seriously? Whoever's involved needs a smack up the head. Don't they realise how risky such magic is?"

Gupta cleared her throat, fidgeting nervously.

"We were completely aware of what we were doing," Gupta said.

Alida looked at her for a moment before turning her attention to Omar, who violently shook her head, and Alida knew that Omar wasn't involved.

"She's right," Khemet said, turning to Gupta. "This kind of magic is very dangerous."

Alida shook her head, before turning away.

"If you'll excuse me," she said, "I need to check on Botswana. My senses are telling me that there's going to be a big 'boom' soon, and I would like to stop it before I lose several rooms. Again."

She knew that Omar understood, and that the other two Egyptians were looking towards the third for clarification, but it was an explanation that needed a vocal response, which meant that Omar couldn't explain.

Oh well. They would learn soon enough.

…

Back in the other world, Ludwig was having a problem. A big problem. And there weren't a lot of people that she could approach about the problem, due to the awkwardness of the situation.

So she went to someone that she could approach about the problem, her face blood red.

"Um, Jana?" Ludwig asked.

The Namibian looked up from her book, watching her brother-turned-sister curiously.

"Ja?" Jana asked.

"Ich habe ein problem."

"Was ist es?"

"Alles ist weiblich. Und ich brauche hilfe."

Jana looked at her for a moment before something clicked, and she snickered, which made Ludwig's blush grow.

"It would seem that Germany is having its first-ever shark week," Jana said.

"Shark…?"

"Euphemism. Anyway, I don't have anything with me. I'm not due until next week. But, if I remember correctly, Vietnam should have."

"…How do you know something like that?"

"We keep track of each other. Trust me, nothing can turn political relations sour faster than messing with someone when granny's visiting."

"How many euphemisms do you have?"

"Several. Now come on. Let's go get you reinforcements before the Red Sea washes everything away."

"Could you stop with the euphemisms?"

"Would you rather have me say it outright?"

"…Nein. Euphemisms will do. Will Vietnam say anything?"

"We have a code: don't discuss this with the men."

"And with the women?"

"You're liable to be the subject of a few bouts of laughter."

…

Tolys found his eyelids drooping. Looking on either side, James and Oliver seemed to be having the same problem.

They didn't want to sleep in enemy territory, but they were just so sleepy. It was getting harder and harder for them to keep their eyes open.

One by one they fell asleep, hoping that they wouldn't be attacked in their sleep.

…

"So, Alida lets everyone take whatever they want from the kitchen?" Roberto asked.

"Sim," Ricardo said. "No one trusts food that someone else made, but no one dares to tamper with ingredients, since there's a chance that it'll come back to bite you. So everyone tends to their own needs when they're hungry."

"That must be horrible," Miguel asked.

"You get used to it. We've lived this way since we were colonies. So it's normal for us."

"So, Marco never made food for you guys?"

"Nope. And I'm glad. His cooking isn't phenomenal."

"Sounds just like Arthur."

…

Lien was holding her stomach as she laughed. Mei was with her, laughing just as hard. It wasn't that unusual to see the Taiwanese like that, but the Vietnamese was a different matter.

Ludwig blushed, glaring at Jana, who was trying hard to remain stoic, but it was obviously a feeble attempt.

Ludwig shuddered, and that caused the women to calm down. Lien walked over towards her bag before taking out the thing that they had come for.

"You know how to apply it, right?" Lien asked.

"Um, not really," Ludwig said.

The three women explained as calmly as they could, and Ludwig just grew more and more horrified.

"I have to do what WHERE?"

…

Tolys, James and Oliver looked around them, completely surprised with their current location. There were many mirrors, and the place had a mystical air to it.

"About time you showed up," a familiar voice said.

They turned to see who had spoken, and Tolys widened his eyes.

"Felic?" Tolys asked. "But… How? I heard…"

"That I was dead?" Felic supplied. "Tak. It's true. Welcome to a place where souls can enter, but the Deathplayers can't."

"Why are we here?" Oliver asked. "We're not dead, are we?"

"No," Mahesh sighed. "We brought you here to help us out. You see, we have a plan that's going to put a stop to the Deathplayers."

"What do you have in mind?" James asked.

…

Lobsang and Ferdinand had gone to the dining room to get food for themselves. They hadn't expected that their little psychic trip would take so much out of them.

Yao was nearby, watching with wide eyes as the two had their third helping of food.

"Alright," Yao muttered, "maybe you're not like Choden."

…

Lutz had sought out Luciano and Kyo. There was something that they needed to know.

Out of desperation she had approached Reka, and the Hungarian was happy to help, although Lutz could have gone without the other's laughter.

Lutz was pleased to see Luciano and Kyo speaking together, and she didn't care what it was about.

"What's up with you?" Kyo asked upon noticing Lutz's expression.

"Everything about us is female," Lutz said. "And there is one important thing we forgot about."

Kyo and Luciano looked confused, and Lutz sighed, not wanting to clarify.

"Period," she said, a blush on her face.

Kyo and Luciano's eyes widened, and the two looked horrified.

"Please tell me you're joking," Luciano said.

"Nein," Lutz said. "Trust me."

The other two looked towards each other with wide eyes.

"We need to find a way to become male again," Luciano said.

"Hai," Kyo said. "That is one experience with a female body I don't want to become familiar with."

…

"So, this is your plan?" Tolys asked. "You're not going to help us. You're just going to replace us."

"We don't know whether or not your memories will be transferred," Felic said. "But otherwise, it's the same soul, different body. Mine looks like me, only with Feliks's eyes. I've already done it, and we're waiting for the two Brazils to tell us whether or not it worked."

"And if it didn't?"

"Then we'll try again. Really, aren't you ready to do anything to stop the Deathplayers? Think of everything they've done, and tell me you don't want to do something to stop them, even if it meant that you might be gone."

Tolys grumbled, and Oliver and James looked at each other before turning to the other three.

"I agree," James said. "I'm willing to sacrifice myself in order to defeat the Deathplayers."

"And I'm willing to do anything that would punish them for hurting my brothers," Oliver said.

"Great," Mahesh said. "Then we're all in agreement. We'll just wait for the two Brazils before we carry on."

…

The Deathplayers watched the three sleeping Nations with curious expressions.

"They don't usually sleep, do they?" the France Deathplayer asked.

"No," the Spain Deathplayer said. "Do you think this has something to do with whatever little Ricardo and Roberto are doing?"

The England Deathplayer closed his eyes, before cursing in frustration.

"I can't follow them," the England Deathplayer said. "It's as though their minds are blocked."

"We have something on our hands," the Canada Deathplayer said. "And I don't like it."

…

The Portuguese-speaking Nations were returning to the mirror room when they encountered the three Egyptians. They completely froze in shock when Khemet introduced herself as Ancient Egypt.

"But how?" Roberto asked.

"A lot of complicated magic," Gupta sighed. "Anyway, what are you guys up to?"

"We think we have a way to stop the Deathplayers' plan," Ricardo said. "But we can't really divulge it out here."

"Smart," Khemet said, looking just past the Brazilian. "The Deathplayers are always watching. There's one right there."

They turned to look, but they saw nothing.

"Don't bother," Khemet said. "They can make themselves completely invisible if they wanted to, even to those with the magic touch."

"Sim," Miguel said. "I remember. I still don't understand why they attacked the Nations with the magic touch."

"Probably a warning to stay out of the way," Khemet said. "And perhaps to know when your magic is being used and what for."

The Portuguese-speakers exchanged a nervous look, and Khemet chuckled.

"Don't worry," she said. "I don't think they know what you're up to. You seem to have covered your tracks well. But really, what are you doing?"

They exchanged a look again, before Ricardo shrugged.

"As someone who's until recently been a ghost," Ricardo said, "you might help us. This is still in the trial-and-error stage, and we can use all the help we can get."

Khemet nodded, and the three Portuguese-speakers led the way to the mirror room, the Egyptians trailing behind in confusion.

…

Ludwig was lying on her bed, curled into a ball and gripping her stomach. Jana was nearby, torn between sympathy and amusement.

"This is hell," Ludwig said. "This is a whole new level of pain. And how can you be hot and cold at the same time?"

"It sucks, doesn't it?" Jana asked. "Now, are you going to accept the monthlies as a good excuse to skip a meeting?"

"It doesn't happen that often that one of you requests that."

"Some months are worse than others. Those months are usually accompanied by vomiting, at least in my case."

"I thought it was just moodswings you'd get."

"Nein. That's just one of the symptoms. You're not just sensitive emotionally, but physically as well. And your body is kindly telling you that it hates you. Everything will take a whack at you, from head to toe. You crave chocolate, occasionally something salty. You will either be really hungry or have no appetite at all. You'll be nauseous, and let's not forget the migraines."

"Every month?"

"Well, like I said, some months are worse than others. Oh, and your immunity isn't exactly at a good place, so you're more likely to get sick."

"Scheisse. Tell the women that if they ever need a break from meetings because of… this, then they can have it."

Jana smirked, and Theresa came into the room, carrying a plate of ginger snaps and a hot water bottle.

"What's this?" Ludwig asked, leaning up slightly.

"Ginger helps for nausea and stomach-ache," Theresa explained. "And your stomach-ache will also feel better if you apply heat."

Ludwig stared at Theresa for a moment, before accepting the hot water bottle, placing it against her stomach, before taking one of the cookies.

"Danke," Ludwig said.

Jana and Theresa smirked at each other.

…

Anika quickly read the text she received from Jana, before having to reread it once, twice. And then she burst out laughing, startling the males in the room.

"What is it?" Jett asked.

She shook her head, her laughing becoming louder. Eventually Alida had to come to see what her counterpart was laughing about.

"I highly doubt anything on my television would be that amusing," Alida said, hands on her hips. "So what is it?"

Anika forced herself to stop laughing long enough to hand her phone to her counterpart, who blinked at the message in surprise before laughing as well, startling the males even more.

"Oh no," Bruce said, "I don't think I've ever seen you laugh like that. It's a sign of the apocalypse, I'm sure of it."

"Look who has a sense of humour," Jett said, smirking at his counterpart.

Bruce blinked back in confusion.

"I'm being quite serious," Bruce said.

…

When they arrived in their mental world, they noticed something immediately. Gupta and Omar returned to their male forms, and they took a moment to admire their original forms, having grown used to the female bodies.

"Didn't expect that to happen," Gupta said, admiring his male hands.

"It's probably because this isn't a physical realm," Mahesh said, "and this is what your souls and minds are like."

"Who's that?" Nicolai asked, looking at Khemet.

"Ancient Egypt," Ricardo said. "A long story, apparently. Anyway," he turned to Felic, "your egg appeared in front of us. It's in a safe place."

"Good," Felic said. "We're going to try these three now."

"What is it that you're doing, anyway?" Gupta asked.

The group explained their actions to the Egyptians, and they seemed pretty impressed. Khemet nodded her head in confirmation, a smile on her face.

"That could work," she agreed. "Though I'm not sure what kind of effect that would have on the Nations."

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there," Ricardo said. He turned to Oliver, James and Tolys. "Are you three ready?"

"Relatively," James said, looking at the others. "If the eggs end up with us, what should we do? We can't let the Deathplayers get them."

"He has a point," Tolys said. "What should we do?"

Oliver pursed his lips, before looking at James.

"How much magic do you have?" Oliver asked.

"Not a lot," the New Zealander admitted.

"Do you think that the two of us would have enough magic to transport the eggs to safety?"

"If you can use magic," Tolys said, "why not use it to get us out of that cave?"

"Because we don't have enough," Oliver stressed. "The Deathplayers would have thought of that, and they had no problem with taking us. Because there would be no threat."

"We might be able to muster up enough magic between the two of us to transport a few eggs," James said. "How big are they?"

"Just a little larger than an ostrich egg," Roberto said.

"How would you know how large an ostrich egg is?" Ricardo asked.

"He spends a lot of time with Anika at her home," Miguel said. "If I remember correctly, ostrich farming is a huge enterprise, with the eggs and feathers especially valuable."

"Sim," Roberto said. "She kept a few eggs for decoration, and gave me one for my birthday last year. She painted it herself, with the 2010 and 2014 FIFA logos and other memorabilia."

"She didn't…"

"No. She kept 7-1 out of it."

The other Nations were all confused, with the exception of Gupta, who tried to hide his smirk. He then frowned, before turning to Omar.

"A thought just occurred to me," Gupta said. "This isn't a physical realm. Which means that you should be able to speak."

Omar's eyes widened, and all attention turned to him. Khemet smiled at her son.

"Go on," she said. "Try."

Omar looked towards her before he nodded, and he looked thoughtful for a moment, before he opened his mouth.

"Thank you," he said, his voice quiet.

Khemet smiled, before hugging her son, who clung to her, smiling happily.

"Now that that little experiment is over," Tolys said, "should we go try our experiment?"

"Sim," Ricardo said. "Why don't only one of you try for now? Just in case."

"I'll do it," James said. "Let's just hope the Deathplayers don't catch on to what we're doing."

He approached one of the mirrors, and he stared at his reflection. At first nothing happened, and then the reflection's eye colour changed, becoming Fletcher's green instead of his own blue. It also wore a simple black shirt with white pants.

"It seems like it's going to be a pattern," Ricardo said. "Our side has black shirts and white pants, and the other side has white shirts with black pants."

James turned to the Brazilians, before turning his attention to Oliver.

"I think we should go back," James said. "We need to make sure that the egg isn't with us, and if it is, we need to see if we can send it to them."

"I'll go back as well," Miguel said. "Just to see that it gets here, just in case."

"Alright," Ricardo said. "Be back in ten minutes." He turned to the Egyptians. "This place is still a work-in-progress. Would you like to help us build on it?"

"Of course," Khemet said. "This is a fortress against the Deathplayers. I can sense it. And I will do all I can to fortify it even more."

Sorry about all of the period stuff. It was suggested a while back that I include one of the Nations that used to be male experiencing their first ever period. The top two suggestions were Luciano, to see her reaction, and Ludwig, commenting that it's a new level of pain. Ludwig (and Lutz) got it, but Luciano's reaction is also there. As you can see, I had a bit of writer's block, and this was the first thing that popped into my mind.