AN: Here we are, another chapter here. Sorry for the wait. Real life is very busy sometimes.
I hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think!
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"You've already got the one," Daryl said. "It won't be no trouble for you to just—take her in and feed her."
Glenn shook his head at Daryl and Daryl felt his frustration growing with Glenn's continued reluctance to take the infant from him. In the car he'd managed to get her calmed enough so that she didn't drive them crazy before they reached Alexandria, but it was clear that she was hungry. She was hungry and, only thanks to Daryl's ingenuity, was now wearing a questionably clean shirt as a temporary diaper.
She'd been born out there and her mother—probably one of the women they left dead in the clearing—hadn't been prepared to handle her. Not out there. Not with the constant threat of Walkers and other groups. She'd been creative enough to think up the hammock that had saved the girl's life, but it was clear that there had been limited supplies. In this area there would be. Alexandria and the Hilltop, and Negan's forces before them, had cleared most of what there was around. That was one of the reasons, after all, that they even bothered with the scouting parties. Bringing in new people helped them to build their numbers, but it also helped save the lives of the people who might not be able to find anything in their immediate area to help them save themselves.
The baby was hungry, she'd been exposed to the elements, and she needed care soon. Denise had checked her over, declared her to be a few weeks old, and had given her antibiotics for an infection around her umbilical cord. The baby, though, realistically needed more than that if she was going to survive. She needed to be cared for. The easiest way to do that was going to be to find her a family, and preferably one that could take care of feeding her because formula was scarce.
And Glenn and Maggie had one ready-made.
"Don't shake your damn head at me," Daryl snapped, not realizing until the words left his lips that he was as riled up as he was. He'd taken the baby to Denise and he'd gotten her this far, but he was frustrated that nobody else seemed even remotely motivated to help him. "She's starving and she wants something to eat. This pacifier ain't gonna last her too long and Maggie's set to feed her."
"We can't take her," Glenn said. He shook his head again to further solidify his words. "We're not set up for two and it's too much to have a newborn on top of Hershel."
Daryl scoffed at him and shifted the infant in his arms when she started to fuss again.
"You'd just let her die because it's too much?" Daryl asked. "What the hell?"
Glenn raised his eyebrows at him.
"You and Carol take her," Glenn said. Daryl started shaking his head even as the words were coming out of Glenn's mouth. Denise had said the same thing. Glenn wasn't the first to start this line of thought. "Why not?" Glenn asked, responding to Daryl's head shaking. "You're set up and ready for a baby. You know you were ready. Everyone worked to make sure you had everything you need. She needs somebody. And Carol can feed her—you know she can."
Daryl swallowed and shook his head.
"This ain't about cribs or whether or not Carol can feed her," Daryl said. "It's about what if she don't want to feed her. This ain't stayin' up an extra hour at night, Glenn. Not the same as you and Maggie. You don't know what the hell it's..."
Daryl broke off and shook his head at Glenn.
"You don't know," he said. "And I hope you don't, but I need you to take this kid."
"Did you even ask Carol?" Glenn asked.
Daryl hadn't asked Carol. He'd been avoiding Carol since he got back. She was training, he knew that much, or she was occupied in the house. She would know they were back and she would know that, since no call had been made for help, they were all fine. She wouldn't worry too much about him or about a run like this. He could avoid her for a while longer, find a home for the girl, and then fill Carol in on it with nothing more than the usual air of ticking off what they'd seen and done while on the run.
He didn't want to ask her because he was sure that she'd say no. He didn't want to ask her because he didn't want to stir up something in her that she didn't want to deal with right now. He overlooked the things that people said, but he could tell that Carol was hurt every time someone said something stupid about just having another kid. She didn't want another kid. She wanted Maison—and Sophia—and she wasn't getting that back. There wasn't any way to get them back.
"Glenn, I'm askin' you to take this kid," Daryl said. "It'll just be better that way."
"It won't be better that way," Glenn responded. "We're moving to Hilltop and it's going to be risky enough making the trip with Hershel. We don't need to try to make it with two. If we take her? We'll be putting things off and then we'll be risking her life and Hershel's. It's better for you two to take her. You're set up for her. You're ready for her. She needs you. And whether or not you two are ready to admit it, you need her too."
Daryl almost felt helpless for a moment. He stood there, frozen in his inability to come up with any argument more compelling than the one that he'd already given to Glenn, and then the baby started to fuss quietly again. He bobbed her, absentmindedly, in his arms and then turned away from Glenn without even saying another word.
Daryl made his way to the supply area, almost hiding the bundle of a child beneath his arms, and was met by Olivia's cheerful face greeting him at the door.
"Already out of supplies?" She asked.
Daryl was almost shocked by hearing her voice. For the walk over, he'd been so lost in his own thoughts that he'd almost forgotten that he was surrounded by people. He'd definitely forgotten that he was surrounded by cheerful people of the likes of Olivia—people that seemed to lack even half the concerns that he dealt with before he'd properly digested his breakfast.
"Ain't for me," Daryl said, snapping into his reality. "Need formula."
Olivia furrowed her brow at him and then opened her mouth in the almost perfectly round shape of an "O" as she apparently realized that he was holding a baby bundled in the crook of his arm.
"What happened..."
"I need formula," Daryl repeated. "So do you got it or I gotta go find it?"
She nodded.
"We've got some..." she responded, drawing the word out like she was hesitant to even admit that. Daryl didn't know, though, what she might be saving it for if it wasn't for hungry babies. The only response he made was to push past her and get inside the building. She followed him as he went down the hall and started searching the loaded wire shelves himself. She stood by and allowed him to search, in vain, for a moment before she found a can of the powdered formula for him and offered it to him.
"Where'd you get the baby?" Olivia asked.
"Found it," Daryl said. "And I gotta figure out what we're doing with it, but it's gonna starve in the meantime. Bottle? Water? It can't eat this shit dry."
Olivia nodded too slowly for his tastes and then went to get him a bottle and bottle of water. It was as though she'd never seen a baby before or as though she had no idea of how urgently this one seemed to need to eat. Daryl could soothe the baby, every now and again, by tapping its pacifier or by removing the plug entirely and returning it, but it was clear that the baby was famished. There was no telling how long it had been before the mother had found it safe enough to remove the child from the hammock for a feeding. As soon as Olivia reached him, not trusting her to get the food ready in any reasonable amount of time, Daryl directed her to a semi-empty shelf and, one-handed, went about making the bottle to the best of his abilities.
Olivia just watched him and he tried to avoid being entirely frustrated with her.
"What are you going to do with it?" Olivia asked.
Daryl laughed to himself—a laugh born entirely from his frustration at the moment.
"I'm gonna feed it," he said. "The rest don't matter until that's done. You think you could shake this up? Since you're being such a big help and all?"
The bite to the comment seemed to do something to spur the woman on and she immediately took the bottle and finished its preparation. Daryl almost snatched it from her and offered it to the infant as soon as he'd removed the pacifier from her mouth. She took a moment, hesitating in case it might be just another trick, to suck at the bottle, but finally she settled into it.
"She's starving," Olivia said. Daryl hummed. This was information that wasn't new to him in the slightest. "Why don't you—keep her?"
"We aren't throwing her to the Walkers, if that's what you mean," Daryl said. "She survived out there. We don't let her die just because nobody..."
He stopped.
He wasn't going to say it. He wasn't going to say that nobody wanted her. Already, in his gut, he knew that wasn't true. He might not have verbally admitted it, but he already knew the truth. He wanted her. And, maybe, in hindsight, Glenn had been able to see that. Maybe that's why the headstrong Korean had refused to take her in the first place. The road to Hilltop was relatively safe. They'd have little trouble on their move—one or two babies in tow—given that they would be travelling with a group that was more than capable of getting them there safely. Glenn hadn't refused the baby because they simply couldn't offer her a home, he'd refused the baby because he figured that Daryl was already set, somewhere inside of him, on giving her one himself.
But there was Carol to think about.
After all that she'd been through with losing two of her own, and two she'd adopted on top of that, Daryl just didn't know how well she'd warm to the idea. He could make up scenarios in his mind where she absolutely refused the child. He could make up scenarios, too, where all it took was a glance at the baby to make her melt and accept her entirely. The trouble was, he couldn't know which scenario was absolutely likely to occur.
And he wouldn't know until he'd talked to her.
Daryl looked at the baby that was sucking down the contents of the bottle slowly but happily. Then he looked at Olivia. The woman spent almost all of her days hidden out in the supply rooms. He knew that most of that time she spend working on craft projects and reading—there weren't too many people, after all, that needed something twenty four hours a day. She had, more than most of them, a lot of free time. And right now? He was glad for that.
"You hold her," Daryl said. She started to shake her head at him and he responded back with a nod. "Just a bit," he said. "She's good. Just—hold her. Let her eat this. She'll probably sleep. She ain't that old."
"I don't want a baby..." Olivia stammered.
"I didn't say keep her," Daryl clarified. "I said hold her. I'll be back for her. Just gotta go—do something. You hold her. For me? And I'll be back."
Olivia actually cut her eyes around the space like, in the empty building, she was going to find someone to pass the relatively easy task off to. She didn't find anyone, though, and finally sighed. She offered her arms to Daryl and he got the baby settled there, trying to keep her from losing her bottle. He wasn't entirely happy with the finished product—Olivia looked more like she was holding a ticking bomb than a baby—but it would have to do for the moment.
Daryl held his hands up to her like he would if he were trying to calm someone they were approaching on a scouting mission.
"Hold her," he instructed again. "Just a little. I'ma be back."
Olivia nodded at him, unsurely on her face, and Daryl left before she could have even a second to change her mind about her new assignment. He almost jogged out the door and he headed straight in the direction of where he knew that the training would be taking place.
He had to find Carol, and then? He had to have a talk with her. Though he was as concerned about that as Olivia might be about her charge, he had a good feeling about it.
It might take more time than Olivia wanted it to, but he was pretty sure he could keep his word. He'd be back.