I flew with Comet beside Hiccup and Toothless, watching the way Hiccup adjusted his foot to change the position of the synthetic tail fin. Despite what would normally be a crippling injury, Toothless flew as gracefully as any other Night Fury. They worked surprisingly well together. Their friendship was incredibly unique, unlike anything I had ever seen before. Hiccup had become Toothless' first friend, and while he injured Toothless, he had also become the Night Fury's savior. That, and their understanding of each other, their similar age, everything contributed to a relationship I had never even considered before.
Looking down, I saw the faint outlines of a few Seashockers below us, before they disappeared underneath the surface of the icy waves. I glanced down at Comet, who was curiously watching Toothless, no doubt wondering about the strange contraption that he required to be able to fly. I stroked her ear, fingering the feather that flew back from her left ear. I smiled to myself. I belonged here. Flying upon the back of my most trusted friend, with my family. Adopted I may be, but treated as if blood. Valka and Cloudjumper flew ahead of us. We were on our way to a feeding, and Hiccup seemed a bit flustered.
Valka turned around, holding her hand out. We all stopped, Hiccup looking around confusedly. I snuck a look down, watching the ocean swirling below us. Hiccup caught my eyes and looked down as well, watching with a start as the Bewilderbeast burst up from the ocean, spouting fish. As the fish rained down, the Sanctuary dragons flitted about and snatched up fish. Toothless looked excitedly at Hiccup. Hiccup agreed with a laugh, and they began a nose dive as Toothless rushed to snatch fish out of the air.
I looked down at Comet, who already had a determined look in her eyes. We had practiced this many times. We entered a dive, spiraling, the ocean twisting closer and closer towards us. A split second before we hit water, Comet spread her wings wide, barely scraping the surface of the water with her wingtips, and surged upwards vertically, wings flapping quickly and powerfully. We veered the the left, looping around sideways and completing a smooth backflip. I clung tightly to Comet's neckstrap, my thighs tight against her side, body hugging the contours of her neck.
Comet's flight path evened out, and I held my arms out wide, feeling the wind rushing against my face, through my hair, threatening to push me off of Comet's back. I loved the thrill, the danger, the pure joy of soaring through an open sky, plunging through clouds. Taking a deep breath, I brushed the side of Comet's neck, slowly standing up. The wind was furious, trying to rip me off and throw me into the air. I obliged. I ran towards Comet's tail, taking a flying leap and diving downwards.
I heard Hiccup call my name, but I paid no heed. Comet was back by my side in an instant, releasing a happy trill. I reached out a hand, and she carefully tipped to the side, brushing it with a wingtip. I looked down, watching the wide ocean below grow closer. I reached out, fingers finding the neckstrap. I pulled myself back towards Comet. She went into a spin, but rather than spinning sideways, she entered a series of front flips. Her wings held out wide for balance, she turned over and over, finally pulling out of momentum and evening her flight pattern once again. I breathed heavily. The front flips always made me dizzy. We soared back up towards Hiccup.
"Wow. Nice flying." Hiccup commented, earning a happy coo from Comet.
"Not so bad yourself, cripple." I smiled, and he frowned at the nickname. "Kidding," I laughed. "You two fly amazingly well together. I can't believe that life-threatening injury has brought you two so close together in such a short amount of time. It's quite astonishing."
"Thanks Lucaria." He looked down at Toothless, who was still struggling to swallow his mouthful of fish. We flew straight for a few more seconds, and a question came to mind. I knew it was personal, and knew I probably shouldn't be so nosy, but I had to ask.
"Did you ever miss or think about Valka?"
The question caught him off guard, and he stammered a bit before pausing to really think about the question. "I often wondered what had happened to her. I was told she was stolen away, and when I was older, I was told she was eaten by dragons. And at the time, it seemed all too real of a possibility." He looked down, as if deep in thought. "Though I think I never truly believed she was dead. All those years, they told me she was gone, yet some part of me knew she had to be out there still. It just didn't understand why she hadn't returned to us-to my father and me. And as ashamed as I am to admit it-as I grew older, my mind stopped wondering, accepting her absence as a fact. But now, oh what a wonder it is to see her again! I can't believe it, I..." he paused, looking over at me. I must have had a solemn look on my face. "Are you okay?" He asked quietly, barely loud enough to be heard over the wind.
"Oh, I'm..." I was ready to say 'fine', ready to dismiss this growing feeling of pain and sorrow that was rising up inside of me. My heart was too broken, too tired, and I knew the only way to release the growing ache was to share it-finally-with someone other than Comet and Valka. I sighed. "No. I'm...I'm not okay. I'm incredibly happy that you and Valka are reunited, but...it reopens the wound that refuses to heal. My mother, my father...both lost. For good. I saw the fire burning on their shoulders, catching in their clothes...reflected in their eyes. The fear. The pain. I saw them die, Hiccup. And I could do nothing to save them. Nothing to help them. Nothing to protect them..." The tears streamed freely, I did not hold them back. The suffering I had kept close so long poured out, and I allowed it. "Of everyone who could have escaped, and survived, why did it have to be me? Why not my father, the strong, generous, benevolent chieftain of our clan? Why not my mother, the healer, who cared for every human and dragon upon that island? Why me?" I looked down, fists clenched around the neck strap, eyes shut tight. When I looked up, he was watching me with a expression that held as much sorrow as mine.
"Lucaria..." He seemed at a loss for words. What can you say to someone who has experienced pain like that? There is nothing to be said. But I found comfort in his presence alone, he need not speak.
"No need for words, Hiccup...thank you. I had kept that in for so long. Valka knew, and I hated to burden her with my own grief when she had so many other important things to do. But you...you comfort me in a way Valka, nor Comet, cannot. Perhaps it is because you are so close to my age, perhaps it is because you are...my...my new family..." Again I hesitated with my words. Acceptance was something, I realized, I had never worried about until I had lost everyone I knew. And now, when companionship was what I longed for most, I was fearful of being rejected or turned away to fend for myself.
"I will always be a brother to you, Lucaria." He smiled, reaching out a hand. I took it, squeezing it lightly. I allowed the joy to flood my entire being, lifting my heart and freeing my soul. Where the ashes of old flowers lay, new flowers grew, nurtured by the memory of the past generations. My old family remains only in my memories now, and there they shall stay, cherished and never forgotten. But there also a new seed started growing, a new chance, a new family, and with an enlightened heart, I embraced my new life with open arms.