Hehe first off, you can blame the angsty-ness of the last two chapters on the song I'm listening to, Fallen by Sarah Mclachlan. It's great for getting in the angsty mood!

Second off, people (several of you) have messaged me angrily about what's happened. It is just a story! I meant to have this happen from the beginning. It was one of the only plotlines that have remained unchanged since the beginning of this story. Alright? Every couple has their ups and downs, please understand. You know how Hear Me Now was! It still had a happy ending, didn't it? lol.

Enough about that :D Thank you all so much for your lovely reviews! I apologize for what happened, but it had to be done! lol.

Anywho... Wow three chapters in two days? Gasp! That's a lot for this story, huh? haha.

Onward!

Chapter Twelve

Castiel's mind felt groggy and slow. He had the worst headache he'd ever had in his life when he woke the next morning. Groaning, he buried his face under his pillow as light filtered through his window, brightening his room. He didn't know what time it was, didn't really care at the moment, only knew that he wanted to go back to sleep to escape the pain of his headache…and the nagging fear that he'd done something horrible, something he deeply regretted, but he didn't know what…couldn't remember.

He groaned tried to smash his head with his pillow. Maybe that would stop the pain, but somehow he doubted it. He was on the verge of a painful memory, but he couldn't quite tell what it was. He didn't really want to know, because somehow, he knew that he'd done something wrong. He wasn't even sure what had happened to have him have this bad of a headache, couldn't really think on it right now, but he knew it was his fault and he hated it. Guilt gnawed at him painfully.

The phone rang shrilly in his ear. He groaned, waiting for someone to pick it up so he didn't have to, but it seemed that no one was home. Either that or they wanted him to answer it. Swallowing, he lifted his head. The phone stopped ringing and he gave into a heavy sigh of relief, wanting to go back to his darkness.

Then the phone started ringing again. Obviously this person wasn't going to stop until someone answered. Groaning, Castiel sat up and shakily reached for the phone, his vision blurred and his balance unsteady.

"Hello?" he whispered faintly once he answered, rubbing gently at his aching head.

"What did you do to Dean?" Sam growled through the phone angrily, obviously displeased with him.

Castiel frowned. "What? What do you mean?" he asked, because he couldn't remember doing anything…but then again, why else would that guilt be gnawing at him so powerfully?

"He came home yesterday from going to get you and he was completely pissed! He snapped at me twice and has been hiding out in his room! What the heck did you do to him?" Sam snapped.

"I…I don't…" Castiel murmured, struggling to remember yesterday through his hazy mind.

His parents had been fighting, he remembered that. It had gotten bad and loud fast, and he'd called Dean…except Dean hadn't come and he'd gotten angry and had taken off out the back door…after taking his father's alcohol…

"I got drunk," Castiel revealed to Sam, still struggling to remember the details, but he really couldn't. It was all pretty much a blur after that.

"What did you do?" Sam asked. "Because I doubt Dean would have been that made simply because you got drunk."

"I don't…I don't remember," Castiel confessed, combing his fingers through his hair and pulling in frustration as he struggled to think through the fog clouding his mind. The guilt ate at him all the more as he tried to do so - he had definitely done something, then, but what? "How mad is he?"

"Very," Sam said with a heavy sigh. "He won't talk to me. He just snaps and walks away. Didn't even finish supper last night."

Crap. That was bad - very bad. Dean missing a meal, even half of it, was never a good thing.

"I don't know what I did…" Castiel murmured quietly. "I don't know how to fix it…not if I don't know what I did."

"Maybe you should come over here," Sam suggested. "Talk to Dean, because he won't talk to me. He's just moping in his room and he won't come out. He just slams the door in my face, and Dad's not here right now."

"Why not?" To Castiel's knowledge, John didn't work.

Sam hesitated. "Just…Justin business, I guess…"

"Oh…I'm sorry."

"It's fine. So are you going to come talk to him? Please?"

"I…Yeah. I'll try to find Jimmy and have him give me a ride or something," Castiel told him. He was going to go over there and try and fix things, find out what he did and make things right.

"Thanks," Sam sighed, "because I don't know what else to do. I haven't seen him like this before."

I wish I knew what I did…I can't fix it unless I know, he thought worriedly, biting down on his lower. "I'll see you soon," he promised. "Keep an eye on Dean for me."

"Alright - just hurry," Sam told him.

"As soon as I can, I'll be there," Castiel assured him.

"Okay…bye."

The two hung up and Castiel swallowed thickly, feeling sick to his stomach.

He was never, never, getting drunk again. If this was indeed what a hangover felt like and he had to deal with memory gaps, then he didn't wish to have it happen again.

But then again, wasn't that what he'd wanted in the first place? To be able to forget for a little while?

And in the midst of forgetting, he must have done something stupid.

He just hoped he could fix it.

He wasn't sure what he would do if he couldn't.

It was harder getting a ride than he'd anticipated. Wherever Jimmy was, he had his phone turned off or something, because he wasn't answering any of Castiel's calls. He had no way to get to Dean's unless he walked, but that was a long walk and he really needed to get there quickly. Walking would only slow matters down and take time, time he maybe didn't have if he really wanted to fix things.

In a last ditch effort, he wound up calling Gabriel's cell phone. He prayed his cousin answered and would do this for him, because he wasn't quite sure what he would do if he didn't.

The phone rang and rang and rang, and for a moment, Castiel was sure that it was hopeless, that Gabriel wasn't going to answer either.

Then his cousin did answer. "Yes, Cassie?" he drawled in greeting, but Castiel wasn't in any mood to mess around.

"I need you to come pick me up and take me to Dean's," he said quickly, urgently.

There was a brief pause. "Is something wrong?" Gabriel sounded concerned.

"I got drunk yesterday and-"

"Whoa! You got drunk?"

"Yes! And I don't remember what I did, but obviously it was something bad, and I have to make it up to Dean! So please come and get me and take me to his place. I'd walk but it's far and I really need to get there in a hurry. Please, Gabe." He wasn't sure what he'd do if Gabriel couldn't take him. This was urgent, as far as he was concerned.

"Calm down, I'll be there in a few minutes," Gabriel assured him.

"Thanks, Gabe, you're a life-saver," Castiel breathed in great relief.

"No problem. Just make things up with Dean, okay? I know how good you two are together."

Castiel nodded even though Gabriel couldn't see him. "I plan to…if I can. I don't know what I did…just hurry, okay?"

"Be there in a few," Gabriel promised. "See you then."

They hung up and Castiel sat heavily on his bed to wait.

It wasn't a long wait, thankfully, and soon Castiel was on his way to Dean's. Gabriel wasn't saying anything, which was more than a little creepy, but Castiel couldn't think much on it now. His mind was so fractured at the moment that he barely remembered to put his seatbelt on. He had a vague memory of sitting in the Impala while Dean looked straight ahead and flatly told him to put his seatbelt on.

Crap, what he done? It must have been bad…

What if he couldn't fix it? No, he couldn't think like that. He had to be able to fix it, because he loved Dean. He couldn't let something so stupid come between them. Just because he'd gotten drunk and had obviously done something bad, he couldn't let it tear them apart, because he loved Dean too much for that.

Just the thought of losing what they had together scared him more than he cared to admit, and Gabriel must have seen it written on his face, because he grabbed Castiel's shoulder and said, "I'm sure it'll be okay, Cassie."

Would it? Castiel wished he could be as sure as Gabriel.

"Dean loves you," Gabriel said reassuringly, releasing his shoulder. "I'm sure he won't let something you did when you were drunk tear the two of you apart."

Castiel hoped so. He really did.

They stopped outside of Dean's house soon enough, and Castiel all but ran from the car. He stopped with his hand raised, ready to knock on the door, but he heard angry voices coming from inside.

"You can't do that!" Dean was yelling, and it felt good to hear his voice, but it was chilling at how angry he sounded. "That's not fair!"

"I'm your father and you will do as I say!" John snapped.

How loud were they yelling if Castiel could hear them from outside?

He knocked lightly against the door after a moment of brief hesitation. Sam answered, tears gleaming in his eyes when he saw him. "Cas," he whispered shakily. "Now isn't a good time."

"You told me to come," he said, staring. Why did Sam look like he was getting ready to cry?

"You don't control me! I'm eighteen!" Dean growled from somewhere inside the house, causing Castiel to flinch. "I'm out of here!"

Sam was pulled out of the way and Dean began to dart out of the front door, only to stop when he saw Castiel standing there. He blinked, looking shocked for a moment, before his face suddenly went flat and expressionless. Castiel swallowed thickly, wondering how badly he'd messed up when he was drunk.

"H-Hi," he stammered, staring at Dean.

"Hi," Dean said back slowly. After a moment of hesitation, Dean stepped back. "…Come in."

Castiel slowly stepped into the house, wondering what they had been arguing about. John was nowhere to be seen. Castiel figured he must have gone to his room or something to cool down. Sam quickly moved out of the way, watching the two of them worriedly. After a look from Dean, he quickly made himself scarce, disappearing into the kitchen. Dean nodded his head in the direction of the hallway that led to his room, and the two began walking there silently. Castiel had never seen Dean like this before, and it definitely worried him.

They entered Dean's room and Dean quietly closed the door behind them. Then he turned to face Castiel, his face still somewhat expressionless. "How do you feel?" he asked evenly.

"I…Hangover," Castiel said guiltily. "I'm sorry for…Dean, I'm sorry for whatever I did when I was drunk. I honestly don't remember it but I know I was wrong, whatever I did, and I'm sorry."

Dean paused momentarily. "Do you like Aeron?"

"From Drama Club?"

A stiff nod was his response.

"Um…as a friend, yeah," Castiel said, confused. "Why?"

"Do you like him?"

"No. Why would I?" Something in his stomach twisted uneasily. "What did I do?"

Dean shook his head slowly. "Nothing, Cas…nothing. I'm just…being weird, I guess. It's been a bad day."

"Is everything…okay?"

Are we okay? Are we good?

"I guess," Dean replied quietly. "You honestly don't remember anything?"

"No, it's just this big blur," Castiel told him truthfully. "I'm so sorry for whatever I did. I didn't mean it, honest. I was wrong, whatever I did. I'm sorry."

Dean had to believe him, right? Castiel wasn't sure what he'd do if he didn't. He didn't know how to prove it because he didn't even know what he'd done in the first place.

He stepped toward Dean slightly, wanting him to understand that he was sorry, whatever he did, he was sorry. He just wanted things to be okay again. "Dean?" he asked when Dean remained quiet. He lightly reached out and touched his arm tentatively.

Dean shook his head. "It's fine, Cas…I understand."

Castiel breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "Really?"

"I guess, yeah. And anyway…I don't want to fight. I've had enough of that today. I don't want to be mad."

"…What did I do?"

"Nothing. It was nothing…you were just drunk, that's all."

But it felt like there was something Dean wasn't telling him. Castiel frowned at him. "Are you sure?"

"…Yeah. I'm sure." Dean shook his head and moved toward Castiel, smiling faintly, a tired look in his eyes. Castiel happily allowed himself to be pulled into the tight embrace as Dean's arms wrapped around him like a warm, reassuring blanket.

"Are…we okay?" Castiel whispered nervously.

There was a pause. Castiel held his breath.

"Yeah," Dean breathed finally. "We're okay."

Um, I hope I captured the personalities and anger and guilt and everything okay? Truthfully I have no experience with doing something bad while I'm drunk...I've never had alcohol, lmao, sooooo yeah. And I've never been in a good relationship, so yeah! The feelings and stuff might be off. Let me know! Thanks again for the reviews, they're what made me want to update so quickly! Please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~