A./N.: The worst is behind us and now we and they can focus on their budding relationship. I really do enjoy writing a good love story over all that angst before. There will still be bumps in the road and real obstacles, but as promised it gets better. Please leave a review if you feel like it. Hope you enjoy this new chapter.

Feeble Hold On Sanity

Sybil had watched in silence as the servants had dispersed back to their respective work. All that is, except Anna and Mr Bates. Anna was still as white as a sheet and swaying on the spot. Sybil could only imagine how the events had to affect her. Her gaze went to her own mother and her heart squeezed together at the thought of anything – not to mention something like what had happened to Mrs Hughes – happening to her. She saw how Mr Bates slowly approached her and gently interlaced his fingers with Anna's, tugging at her hand to get her attention.

"She will be fine," he said softly. "Mr Carson is with her."

Anna nodded jerkily, but not entirely convinced. She was worried – beyond words and since that awful night without let-up, worried for Mrs Hughes, worried for Mr Carson, worried for them both together. She had seen Mrs Hughes struggle to get back to a somewhat normal life, struggle to not flinch whenever she heard the voice of a man, struggled to not dwell too much and too often on what had happened to her … but had failed. Now this. Was this nightmare never coming to an end? Anna couldn't even comprehend the newest development. Mrs Hughes, her beloved surrogate mother, was pregnant. She would be marrying Mr Carson. She couldn't begin to imagine how lost Mrs Hughes must feel.

"But …" Anna's voice was hoarse with suppressed emotions.

Sybil's own heart cried out to her to go after Mrs Hughes and make sure she was alright. Stepping forward, she interrupted whatever feeble reassurance Mr Bates was about to give and took Anna's hand in her own.

"Let us go see if Mrs Hughes needs anything," she said softly.

Immediately the tumult in Anna's heart settled and she nodded eagerly.

oOoOoOo

When Sybil opened the door to Mrs Hughes' room, she had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. She could hear sounds of distress coming from it even before the door was fully open. Upon entering Sybil was confused; she didn't see the housekeeper at first … until she spotted the woman cowering in a corner of the room. Her arms were tightly wrapped around her body and she was swaying to and fro, rocking herself. There were no tears in her eyes, only a lost expression, empty and helpless.

"Oh no," Sybil breathed out. Instantly she was by Mrs Hughes' side and tenderly unwound her arms, instead wrapping her own ones around the older woman. Gently she drew her into a heart-felt embrace, pleading with Anna for help. "We should get Mr Carson …" she offered uncertainly.

Anna tore off through the door and down the stairs, nearly tripping and falling head first down the many flights of stairs.

oOoOoOo

Carson was standing next to the stove, looking down onto the boiling kettle while contemplating how rapidly his life had been turned upside down. He was so engrossed in his own thoughts that he wasn't even jolted from them by the loud whistling noise of the kettle.

Quietly Beryl observed her friend and let him be. When the kettle whistled, she only took it off the stove, but didn't scold him for his absent-mindedness. She had witnessed the growing fondness between her friends … and had feared for their mental state/sanity after Elsie's attack. Now Charles, in this unguarded moment, showed how rattled he really was by recent events over the last three months. It tore at her heart to see both Charles and Elsie suffer. If she ever got near that pitiful excuse of a man, she would castrate him with the dullest knife she could find in her kitchen.

On top of the nonstop worry for her friends, she suddenly found herself the reluctant recipient of a constant stream of tearful maids. Daisy had been the first, tearfully asking her what she could do for their housekeeper and then sobbing into the soup she was cooking for her – Elsie's jaw had been too sore to eat anything proper for two days. Later that day Beryl had found Anna cowering in the laundry room, sobbing over the torn and blood-stained clothes of the woman she considered a mother. Even Miss O'Brien had come to the deserted kitchen late that night with red-rimmed eyes and a grim line around her mouth.

"I can't stand to listen to her sobs one moment longer," she had said gruffly, but with unshed tears glistening in her stormy grey eyes. "Lady G is with her anyway."

Now it seemed that the only member of staff who had steadfastly avoided coming to her, was finally letting his true emotions show. Beryl had observed her oldest friend since that night and what she had seen had frightened her. He was strung tight as a bow, ready to snap at the slightest touch. She had seen him reaching breaking point when Grigg had been arrested. For the first time she had been afraid of Charles, the boy and now man who was like a brother to her. One of his large hands had held the man by the throat while Grigg had slowly turned blue. There had been no mercy in Charles' eyes.

No anger was present now, but an emotion just as strong. A fierce protectiveness towards Elsie, but no real knowledge of what he was protecting her, what to do to make things better.

Hesitantly Beryl reached out and gently lay her hand on his forearm, drawing his attention at last away from his disturbing thoughts and back to reality.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said quietly, "I was miles away."

Beryl scoffed lightly. "Obviously," she retorted amiably. "What is on your mind, Charles?"

"I would think you knew that," he muttered under his breath. "Elsie. What else should be on my mind? It is Elsie, always Elsie …"

"As it should be since you both are going to marry," Beryl interrupted.

Charles shook his great head woefully. "What if scare her?" he asked plaintively. "What if I'm a terrible husband to her?"

Beryl chuckled. "You couldn't if you tried," she reassured. "She loves you, you know that …"

"She never said," Charles said sadly.

"And when do you propose she should have told you something this important? Elsie was r-raped," Beryl stuttered over the word, closing her eyes and trying to breathe evenly. "You are the only male person she lets near her. You are allowed to hold her in your arms when she shies away from most others. She said yes. Give her time, that's all she needs now. Time. Believe me she is marrying you out of love – even if she hasn't said it."

Before Charles could answer her, Anna rounded the corner at a rapid pace. She skidded to a halt in front of her two superiors and fought for breath. Her hands were pressed to her sides where she felt a stabbing pain from running through the house. Gasping for breath, she burst out, "It's Mrs Hughes. She needs you …"

More was not needed as both Mr Carson bolted out the door and Mrs Patmore dropped the tea strainer immediately, hastening after the butler. Anna could only lean against the doorframe and continue to gasp for breath. She just hoped that Mr Carson wouldn't barge into the housekeeper's room with that look of thunder on his face.

Charles had only her Elsie's name and had taken off. He had had a bad feeling leaving her in her room, especially after she had clung to him on the stairs, but had reasoned with himself and her that she needed rest. Now he regretted his rash decision. What if she had come to any harm? Taking two steps at a time he tore up the stairs and easily left Beryl far behind.

Upon entering, he was momentarily thrown because he couldn't see Elsie lying on the bed … to be honest it didn't even look as if she had lain down since this morning, every corner neat and the blanket without a wrinkle. Then he heard a tentative voice from behind him and whirled around.

"Carson, we're here."

The sight before his eyes brought tears to them. Lady Sybil Crawley sat on the floor, gently holding Elsie to her and occasionally stroking her hair tenderly. Charles closed his eyes and berated himself for his stupidity and negligence. Slowly he came closer before crouching down to the level of the two women. His hand reached out to touch Elsie and interlace his fingers with hers, but then he stopped himself. 'Don't scare her,' the constant prayer of the last weeks was back in his mind. Instead he opted to make himself known to her before attempting to touch her, "Elsie, love, I'm here," he spoke quietly, before tenderly asking, "Now what's all this about, darling? Tell me, you can trust me."

And before he knew what happened, his arms were filled by a beautiful Scottish housekeeper, clinging to him as if he was her only lifeline, the only thing that anchored her in reality. The force of her impact sent him backwards, falling back onto his behind rather forcefully with her in his lap.

"Oh Charles," she cried, raw emotions filling her usually so controlled voice. "You weren't here …"

It was all she was able to utter before beginning to shake in his arms, teeth shattering and arms nearly suffocating him in a fierce, bone-crashing hug. His own arms wound around her trembling form and he stroked her back, making the strokes long and languid, not rushing her and not allowing himself to rush things. If this was what she needed, then he was more than willing to give her that. His voice rumbled from his chest in a soothing whisper, sending vibration straight into her body since she was pressed this closely to him.

"Sh, sh, love, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. I promise you that. You are safe here in my arms."

That broke Elsie and a sob escaped her lips before she pressed them to his mouth. It was not gentle, but desperate. When she opened her eyes, they were a clear, beautiful blue – for the first time in weeks – and she looked directly into his eyes.

"Don't leave me," she pleaded, "When you're gone it all comes back."

From the door Charles heard a breath hitch in one's throat. He wasn't sure if it was Beryl's or Lady Sybil's, but quickly decided it didn't matter. Tenderly he stroked Elsie's cheek and feathered light kisses across her forehead, nose and cheeks.

"I'm not leaving your side," he reassured softly but with a firm look in his eyes. "You're not alone."

Finally his lips feathered kisses across her lips, lightly caressing her with them. Her small smile spread across Elsie's lips and she pressed a hesitant and inexperienced kiss to his lips, finally understanding how a woman could get lost in them and the love she felt for a man.