February 3, 2004

"And that's how it started," Luna said. "Well, you know what I mean."

Hermione watched Luna for a long moment. Her eyebrows were pulled tightly together and her bottom lip was between her teeth. Luna fixed her with a steady stare, and prayed that none of her emotions were betrayed on her face. Four years had passed since that particular night with Harry and the thought of it made butterflies erupt in her stomach. Butterflies, immediately and inevitably followed by the crushing reality of what their relationship had been reduced to.

Hermione cleared hear throat gently and Luna was pulled, unwilling, back into the present moment. "I still don't understand," Hermione began. "You had a crush on Harry whilst back at Hogwarts, okay. I'll accept that. And then the two of you formed a special bond, and eventually grew to love one another. I think that I can accept that too. But in all that time, nothing happened between the two of you? God, that must've been… years of…" Hermione paused, attempting to get the timeline straight.

"Four years, actually," Luna said quietly. Four agonizing years spent in a maddening limbo. Four years that Luna spent delighting in Harry's presence, cherishing his soft, secret smiles that he gave to her… and four years that she spent aching for him to touch her. Just once, even if only in passing… even if by accident.

"Four years," Hermione echoed. "And you never once-"

"Never," Luna snapped. Hermione was beginning to overstay her welcome and Luna's patience for her insinuations was quickly running thin. "We never kissed, touched, anything. You're digging for details that do not exist and I know that I've told you that before."

Hermione blanched and opened her mouth, stammering out an apology. "Luna, I'm sorry. This is just very-"

"Unexpected. Yes, I know," Luna said, her voice picking up a mean tone. "And it seems to me that, if you must continue on with your notion that Harry was not faithful to Ginny, your problem should be with him. Only with him. And before you attempt to say that I was the wedge between them, I'll kindly ask you to leave. It was lovely to see you again, Hermione, and I am glad that all is well with you and with Ron. But I won't allow you to barge into my home like this again. I've told you all that there is to tell. Harry and I fell in love with one another, quite accidentally, but he honored Ginny in all areas of their relationship. His decision to break things off with her was entirely his alone and like I've said, I haven't spoken to him in three months. And I'd like to remind you that Harry wasn't the only person to suffer because of this ordeal. I sat quietly by, for years, while he remained in a relationship with Ginny. I never once asked him to leave her or for him to choose me. I just waited, and prayed, and hoped…" Luna took a tight breath and willed the tears not to form. Please, just this once… "But in the end, he chose her and that was it. There is nothing more for me to say on the subject. Now, if you would be so kind. I have other responsibilities that I need to see to."

Luna gestured at a small pile of parchment rolls that were stacked at the end of her kitchen table. She quickly found Rolf Scamander's letter amongst the other inquiries and suddenly, Luna felt exhausted. Hermione stood and pulled her handbag over her shoulder. She offered one last look to Luna filled with – what? Confusion, annoyance, condescension… pity. Luna definitely saw the pity in Hermione's eyes but could not muster the energy to feel any certain way about it. Perhaps, after all, she deserved someone's pity. Perhaps Luna deserved for someone to understand what she went through, even if just superficially.

"I, well. Thank you for your time, Luna. And… I'm sorry," Hermione said. She nodded once before turning and exiting through the sitting room and finally, out the door. As soon as Luna heard the latch click, an enormous weight felt lifted from her chest. Luna looked back at Rolf's letter and pulled it to her, her eyes darting over his request once more.

Simply stated, the opportunity sounded amazing. Truly, a once in a life time endeavor and if passed up, Luna knew that she would regret it. But could she bring herself to leave her home? A few years ago, she would not have hesitated to go with Scamander and see the world but now? Things were no longer that simple. Luna had placed her father in a long term care facility owned by St. Mungo's and never once allowed herself to feel so though he had not been abandoned. Could she leave her home too?

Could she bring herself to leave Harry?

Luna laughed to herself and searched for a fresh sheet of parchment. Leave Harry? Are you mad? He left you. He hasn't bothered to even say hello since that night… She pulled a quill and an ink pot to her side and began to pen her response to Scamander. Seven months would be plenty of time to put her affairs in order for an extended stay away… seven months to make amends and tie up loose ends.

Luna nodded to herself and set to her task.

3 February
Mr. Rolf Scamander

Mr. Scamander,

I was flattered to receive your inquiry and would enjoy a meeting to discuss the details and particulars at your earliest convenience. Please let me know the date and time of your choice, and we can meet at the Leaky Cauldron in London.

Sincerely,

Luna Lovegood
Editior-in-Chief, The Quibbler