June 2004

Harry opened his eyes and the first thing to register was the vast expanse of stars that peppered the purplish sky over head. The second thing that he became aware of was the splitting headache that seemed determined to rip his brain into quarters. Harry was unsure whether the headache had been born from the interactions between his skull and the concrete walls at the party or from the aftermath of drinking too much scotch. He decided that it was probably a combination.

But how Harry had come to be flat on his back, in the middle of the night, staring up at the stars was lost on him. The wetness of the dew had seeped into his dress clothes at some point during his sleep outside and Harry finally pulled himself to his feet, staggering as the world swam sickeningly before his eyes. Harry could vaguely make out the shape of Luna's house several meters into the distance and he began to stumble towards it.

The moment Harry's foot hit the first stone of the handmade path that led to Luna's front door, he felt as though he had stepped beneath an invisible waterfall. Harry instantly recognized the sensation as magic and was not totally surprised when he heard Luna's disembodied voice whisper, "stupify" from all around him. Mere seconds later, his body was launched several meters back and Harry once again was left staring up at the night sky.

The moment that the curse wore off, Harry jumped to his feet. The shock of the magic had sobered Harry almost instantly and he ran towards Luna's home, slowing only once he reached the periphery of her property. Obviously, she had put up protective spells to keep unwelcome intruders out but Harry had never imagined that he'd be the person who Luna would want to keep out. Harry leveled the darkened house for a moment more before he realized that no one was home. Luna must have left the party hours earlier and yet… where the hell was she? Harry began to pace furiously around the perimeter of her house as worse case scenarios began to invade his mind.

First, Harry imagined that Luna was hurt somewhere and he began to panic. Never in their time together as a couple had Harry ever spent a stretch of time in which he did not know exactly where Luna was and what she was doing. Was she in trouble? Did she need him? The feverish thoughts began to race through Harry's mind and his anxiety began to grow. But then all at once, what had happened between him and Luna - what Harry had done - came flooding back into his memory and Harry stopped his frenzied march. Harry clutched at his stomach as nausea overtook him and Harry remembered the way that Luna looked, the way that Rolf Scamander stared at her, and the way that Luna refused to even look at Harry.

Harry doubled over and began heaving, violently. Once the sick was all out of him, Harry slumped back into the grass and for a third time that night, found himself staring up at the stars. Numbness dulled the panic and anxiety that Harry felt only moments before. So, where was she? Harry's thoughts began to roll again and he fixated on the memory of the adoration in Rolf's eyes as he gazed at Luna. Harry's thoughts turned toxic as he imagined Luna with Rolf at that very moment. She'd either be with him for the sole intention of hurting Harry or - even worse, he imagined - she wasn't thinking of Harry at all. Minutes began to fly by with Harry laying motionless in the grass, paralyzed by the thought of Luna with another man.

It wasn't until the sun broke over the tops of the trees that Harry decided to move. He picked himself up and cast a glance towards Luna's home once more. The same home that they'd spent their happiest moments in and now… the same home where Harry was no longer wanted. Harry sucked in a deep breath and vanished into the morning air with an echoing pop.

He'd be lying to himself if he tried to believe that he wasn't surprised to find Ron's sleeping figure sprawled on the small sofa in the flat that was all but abandoned. With no where else to turn, Harry had decided to come back to his small flat for the first time in months and was darkly appreciative that he had not ended his lease. Harry slammed the door that led into the living room from the outside hallway and watched as Ron jumped awake. Ron stared up at Harry in confusion and Harry was granted a glimpse of the man who used to be his best friend in the entire world. But the moment was fleeting and Harry was fixed with the same expression that nearly everyone in his life leveled him with - disgust.

"Let's be clear," Ron said as he stood. Harry cocked an eyebrow as he took in Ron's clothing - the same dress cloaks he'd worn to the party the night before. "The only reason I'm here is because Hermione wanted to be and I'll be damned if I let her around you alone after the shit you pulled last night."

"What the hell are you talking about," Harry barked at Ron. The hangover, the probably concussions, and the wake of his erratic emotions had pushed Harry to the very edge of his calm, and the look that Ron was giving him made him feel nearly violent. Ron snorted meanly.

"That's rich. Of course you don't remember, you fucking drunk," Ron spit at Harry. "Where's Luna, mate?" Harry stared at Ron, his brow furrowed in confusion. "That's right. You have no idea. You're like a damned tornado. You destroy everything that you come in contact with!"

Harry crossed the room and came nose to nose with Ron. "Where is she," Harry demanded. "You know where she is. Where the hell is she, Ron?" Ron laughed and pushed Harry back by the shoulders.

"You must be out of your mind if you'd think that I'd ever tell you where you could find her. Why? So you can terrorize her a second time? You need help. You're a fucking mess," Ron accused.

"Terrorize her? Cut out the fucking bullshit, Ron," Harry bellowed. "What are you talking about?"

Ron stared at Harry for a moment before heading towards the door. "The fact that you could forget last night says a whole lot about your character, mate. I'd hoped that the old Harry was buried somewhere in there but apparently I've been holding out for nothing. You're fucking wrecked, Harry. You need help. I mean it - you need serious, professional help. We'd thought you had a drinking problem but seeing you last night? It's worse than that." Ron reached the door and pulled, stepping out into the landing outside of Harry's flat. "I sincerely hope that was the first and only time you've ever touched Luna like that." With that, Ron slammed the door shut.

Harry waited just one moment before Apparating.

He pounded his fists against the door and after what seemed like hours, a sleepy Hermione finally answered. As soon as she opened the door, Harry shouldered his way past her and stared frantically around the foyer of her and Ron's new home. Hermione turned after Harry, but her hand lingered on the door, keeping it ajar.

"Do you know where she is?" Harry demanded, turning towards Hermione.

"You can't be here," she said softly. Harry blinked a few times before her statement registered in his mind.

"What?" Harry asked, dumbfounded.

"I said," Hermione said, and paused to clear her throat. When she spoke again, her voice was louder and more demanding. "I said that you can't be here. Ron does not want me to be alone around you and I am respecting his wishes. You have to leave." Hermione pulled her door open even wider.

"Has the entire world gone fucking mad," Harry yelled. He crossed the foyer in a few long strides and stared down at Hermione. "Somebody better tell me what the hell is going on or I swear to Merlin, I will lose my mind. Where is Luna? She never came home last night. Where the fuck is she, Hermione?! I'm going mad here. I need to see her. I need to speak with her and I have no idea how to find her."

Hermione left her station at the open door and closed the distance between herself and Harry. With a resounding SMACK, Harry's head snapped to the side with the full force of Hermione's punch to the right side of his face. When he regained his senses, he turned his shocked gaze back to her and found her shaking out her wrist vigorously. She stared at him with venom.

"That's for Luna. That's also for the complete and utter ass you've been to me. You want to know what happened? Fine. But it'll be over my dead body before I ever help you track her down. Accio Pensieve." Harry heard a whirring noise and suddenly, a bronze Pensieve floated between the two of them. Harry looked up to see Hermione pulling a silvery thread from her temple with the tip of her wand and watched, perplexed, as she shook the memory into the Penseive. Harry saw figures beginning to swim in the pool and looked back to Hermione.

"You've got the length of that memory," she said. Harry paused. "I'm perfectly serious, Harry. Go - now."

Harry stepped forward and lowered his face into the surface of the pool…

He stood behind Hermione and saw Ginny moving down the hallway to a collection of figures just outside of the women's restroom. Harry moved past Hermione and looked back at her, shocked by the look on her face. Hermione looked frightened and tears were pooling in her eyes.

Harry moved down the hall.

Ginny stood behind Ron and Harry noticed her reach down the front of her dress for her hidden wand. She brandished it, ready to attack. Ron sprung into action and Harry recognized himself. Time seemed to slow within the memory as he took in what was transpiring.

He was obviously drunk and he had Luna cornered, between his body and the wall. She was pleading with him. Harry dimly heard her shouting, "You're hurting me," and turned his eyes to where his hand was violently gripping her arm. Harry's stomach heaved when the fear in Luna's eyes registered - fear of Harry. Harry watched himself as his grip tightened around Luna's arm. Her skin spilled over his fingers as it was displaced by the force of his hold and Harry knew with certainty that he had, at the very least, left a deep bruise.

And then all too suddenly, he was back in Hermione and Ron's home, gasping for breath. Harry felt himself being lurched back and realized that Ron was pulling, pushing him across the room and towards the door. Hermione had sunk back against the wall and began to open her mouth to intercede but decided against it. Harry searched her eyes for any hint of sympathy or apology, and found nothing but emptiness. When the two men reached the threshold, Ron violently pushed Harry out of his home.

"I never want to see you here again," Ron said, his voice void of any emotion. And as Harry began to process the memory that Hermione had given him, he heard the crack of the door slamming shut behind him.