Chapter 2 – Happiness Lost
… 'and we both know what happened last time you tried to befriend a murderer.' The words stung, and I was unable to hide the mask of surprise that stretched across my face. But… nobody had said anything, and Sans turned to me with confusion. "you okay, bro? you look pale… for a skeleton." He reached over to place a hand on my forehead. "U-UM… IT'S NOTHING, BROTHER! LOOK, METTATON IS MAKING SPAGHETTI!" I pointed overenthusiastically at the TV to divert his suspicion, which fortunately was successful as he withdrew his hand and leaned against the arm of the couch. Did I imagine that? My brother would never suggest such a thing, and I… well, I hoped I wasn't developing such dark thoughts. Perhaps it was my brother's negative influence, but he was the one who needed help. He didn't need to be worrying about me; he'd done enough of that for a lifetime.
Mettaton droned on as he dramatically posed before his finished dish of spaghetti. It definitely wasn't as good as the spaghetti that I'd made for Sans if the glitter on top was any indication. I was about to declare that exact point when I heard the light snores beside me. Sans had fallen asleep once again. Accepting the inevitable, I quietly turned off the TV and the lights before removing the barely touched spaghetti from where it'd been left. Carefully I transferred the spaghetti into a plastic container before adding it to my spaghetti museum (otherwise known as the fridge). Finally, I went upstairs and took a clean blanket from my closet before walking back to the living room to place it over my sleeping brother. As I was about to walk away to attend to some other chores, I was stopped by a hand around my wrist. Glancing behind me, I noticed Sans had, by all appearance, reached out to me in his sleep. Normally I wouldn't condone his oversleeping but… Carefully I settled down on the couch beside him, snuggling up against him as I pulled the blanket over us both. "GOOD NIGHT, SANS." Ever so slightly, his smile became relaxed as he slept.
"Alphys, you've been up for days." Undyne remarked behind me as a cracked open yet another human 'energy drink' before downing it in its entirety. I hardly needed her to remind me as my body did the same: a pounding headache and sore muscles getting the message across. In fact, I'd almost forgotten Undyne was here. "I know." I responded, crumpling my latest notes on the fallen monsters and tossing them into a trashcan by my workbench. With a sigh I gave in to my body's demands, my forehead hitting the table with a solid smack as I let exhaustion take over. I had a few minutes before my energy drink kicked in anyway. The dull throbbing in my head was almost a pleasant distraction from my body screaming at me for the mistreatment I had dealt it. I was beginning to wish that I could join the monsters who I was seeking to cure, letting someone else take up the torch.
"You know, they wouldn't want you to be hurting yourself like this." I heard her say as she gently wrapped her arms around my shoulders, resting her head on mine. I was slightly alarmed, as it was almost as if she'd read my mind. She was right, but I knew just as well as everybody: monsters wanted results, and the only one who could give them was me. As I adjusted my position to be more comfortable, I couldn't help the simple joy that rose up within me as I noticed the light from my desk lamp reflect off of the simple band on my finger.
Undyne and I had been friends as soon as we met when I was promoted to Royal Scientist. I could remember it as clear as day… she walked into the lab to introduce herself for the first time and was astounded by the anime I had been watching. Ashamed at being caught, I passed it off as 'watching human history'…and it all started from there. She came by time and time again to watch anime that she seemed to think was actual human history, went to the dump with me as I dug around for human artifacts that she had no interest in, and even called me about the weather despite there being no weather in the Underground. She made me feel like I was worth something when all I had was self-deprecation over my failures. Before I knew it, I had a massive crush on her… I drew her name in the margins of my pages, even wrote fanfiction of us living a domestic life together! ...Not that I would admit that to anybody.
…So understandably I was terrified when the barrier broke and the truth on a number of my lies would have to come to light. I thought she'd hate me when I told her that anime wasn't real. But she didn't, only laughed and told me she'd known the whole time… even though she really hadn't. Still, it made me happy that she had tried to make me feel better. And when I announced the results of my determination experiments, well, it was the most difficult thing I'd ever done in my life. The amalgamations were really sweet at heart but… they were really scary to look at; a real failure and I was a good judge of failure. I expected the worst; so I was shocked when the monsters welcomed the amalgamations with open arms, grateful for the return of their loved ones. And Undyne… told me I'd done the right thing, that she was proud of me.
But even as we grew closer with the time after the barrier broke, I'd never thought she'd ever return my feelings quite the same way. She even asked me out soon after, but I hadn't thought she was taking it seriously. So a month after the barrier broke, when she took me to a human Japanese sushi restaurant (which I'd always wanted to visit), and I discovered that she'd put a ring in our sushi… well, I passed out. And when I woke up, I had a panic attack. Certainly not the most graceful proposal that had ever happened. But when I finally calmed down enough to ask her why she'd want to marry a failure like me… she told me that I'd better take that back and give her a proper answer unless I wanted her to beat the monster up who made me feel that way… So obviously I said yes, and it was like a romantic scene from Mew Mew Kissie Cutie (But only the first, never the second or third). I'd never been happier… even in my dreams I never thought that Undyne would be my fiancé. Life was taking a turn for the better and maybe I could finally be happy!
…Life had never been that kind, and certainly not for me. Monsters had started falling in unusual numbers and it was like reliving my old nightmares in the Underground. I'd never come up with a cure, and all I'd managed to do was irrevocably destroy countless monster's lives. But there was nobody else who could do it. Like Undyne had said, I'd been working for days. When I wasn't assisting the others with tending to the fallen, I was in my laboratory trying to come up with a solution to all of this. Everybody was counting on me yet again despite the fact that I could count my successes on one hand. Looking back, it was as if someone knew that this would all happen when my new lab was set up to have a clinic since monsters didn't have anywhere for their sick to go.
…And everybody seemed to forget that while I was a doctor, my education wasn't focused in monster biology. I, Dr. Alphys, was an expert (not really) in the field of soulology, the study of the soul and the role of magic in the soul. I created Mettaton, extracted determination from human souls, and had been planning on starting research into creation of artificial souls. My knowledge on monster biology was limited, and while it did overlap with the study of the soul, I certainly wasn't an expert. Like I had with the other subjects, I did the basics: Checked for pathogens, damage to the soul, and interruptions in the flow of magic. Just like before, my search revealed nothing. There was no immediate hope for a cure to a phenomenon I knew nothing about.
Though unlike the previous fallen monsters, I had data on where the fallen monsters had been discovered and a pattern to where they continued to fall. With the aid of human's research (which they had graciously allowed me access to their databases as soon as they met me), I could compare my data to human epidemics… Like I suspected, something was causing the monsters to fall and it was spreading. I just didn't know what yet and my searches had revealed nothing. What I needed was a subject that we could predict would fall so I could observe the process… I could add that to my to-do list right under a qualitative research study to reveal clues about the monsters that had fallen. I definitely didn't have the time for any of this, and the pressure only built every day. I could see their families, and I had to tell them to their face every day that they weren't any better.
…As time went by, planning our wedding just seemed like it had been a distant daydream. "Well. I'm tired. We're going home." Undyne announced, hoisting me over one shoulder as if I weighed nothing. "U-Undyne! Y-You can't…!" I stuttered as I could feel my scales change red from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. She could at least not carry me like… I didn't even want to describe how. "What was that? 'Undyne, please take me home faster! I'm tired!' Why, of course Alphys! Just for you, I'll kick things up a notch!" An all too familiar diabolical grin stretched across her face as she kicked the door open, rushing at top speed out of the lab to her house. Shamefully, I placed my hands over my face, embarrassed at what onlookers would be witnessing (not that many monsters were out around midnight). But at the same time, I was strangely having fun. Perhaps a night of rest with Undyne was exactly what I needed.
It was early in the morning when I woke up again and Sans, for once, still seemed comfortable. "GOOD MORNING, SANS." I told him as quietly as I could manage and he only snored in response. Unlike Sans, I didn't sleep often as sleeping just ate up time I could be spending doing other more productive things. I felt guilty as I looked upon my comfortably sleeping brother, as this was the most restful I'd seen him be in a while since he normally was woken up from his nightmares. Unfortunately for him, I couldn't stay home all day and I regretfully extracted myself from the couch before heading to the kitchen. Before I left I grabbed a bottle of ketchup from the kitchen for Sans, setting it down near my napping brother and heading out the door to greet the morning.
Morning was always my favourite time of day, especially on the surface. For one, the sun always rose in the morning; a brilliant ball of light peeking over the horizon before taking its rightful place in the sky. Nothing like that ever happened in the Underground, and to a monster who had been locked away all that time… it was breathtaking each and every time. Another thing I liked about the morning was the fresh smell. It was as if overnight nature cleaned up to prepare for when everybody woke up the next day. Being a monster who liked things clean and organized, it struck a good chord in me. Finally, the morning was always quiet… a certain peace was present as the morning monsters went about their business under the morning sun and the others slept. While time was difficult to tell in the Underground due to a total lack of changing times and seasons… the surface definitely was a place full of time; and the morning was definitely the best time. Unfortunately, my morning would be taking a turn for the worse when my cell phone began to ring.
Disappointed by the peaceful quiet that had been broken, I quickly answered the call. "GOOD MORNING! THIS IS PAPYRUS!" I greeted cheerfully. If anything was for certain, I would definitely always be a morning monster. The monster on the other end, however, clearly wasn't. "Good, you're awake. We've got a situation on New Home outskirts, Asgore's- well… you'll get it when you see it. Can you be here in 10?" A grouchy all-business Undyne asked on the other end of the line. So much for peace and quiet. "OF COURSE! I'LL BE THERE RIGHT AWAY!" There was a click as she hung up on me. If this had something to do with Asgore, there was no doubt in my mind that something bad had happened with the humans.
Heading to the garage, I started the bromobile, pushing back the bittersweet memory of Sans in his better times. Sans made sure that my dream would come true, and he was so happy then… it was as if his dream had come true as well. It probably had given how much he was willing to…sacrifice for me. Before I could recall that fateful day, I brought the bromobile out onto the road and headed down the highway towards Ebott's outskirts.
I stopped when I saw a large group of monsters near the outskirts, shouting and holding up signs. They couldn't have… "Hey Papyrus! Get over here!" Undyne waved me over through the front of the crowd. Today she was dressed in her old Royal Guard outfit, dark plate mail with a spear in one hand… there was no doubt in my mind that this was going to be serious. "UNDYNE? WHAT'S HAPPENED?" To answer my question, she only pointed. Following her finger… I saw humans. Humans dressed in strange gowns, gloves, and masks… followed by a large wall of white antiseptic material that stretched off into the distance as it enclosed Mt. Ebott. A sign coldly stated: "QUARANTINE ZONE AHEAD."
A fear deep within sprung up as I turned, and in every direction could see the wall. This was… like the barrier. We were trapped again. I felt claustrophobic… would I never see the humans again? The beach? The library? Where would I go for help with my brother? "Snap out of it Papyrus! I called you here because I need help! As you can see, we are NOT happy about being treated like diseased savages. But we can't let these guys fight it. We… don't have a choice." She shook her head sadly before stepping closer, cupping a hand around the side of my skull. "The humans threatened Asgore into it, we're severely outnumbered and we'll die if a war happens. Hell, humans can't even fall… it's just two sides fighting for control. Disgusting." I couldn't help the sense of awe that arose as she walked to the front of the crowd, picking up a boulder and throwing it down closer before standing on it to give her height.
"HEY! All eyes to the front!" She addressed the seething crowd with a level tone, their attention captured at least for the moment. Signs lowered curiously, written in angry scrawl 'STOP THE QUARANTINE!' 'PROTECT MONSTER RIGHTS!' 'WE AREN'T ANIMALS!' "Don't think any of us are HAPPY to be stuck like this. It sucks. But this is something we have to do for the humans. Think about it; the humans have done a lot for us. They gave us a place to live. Gave us rights. Let us join them as friends. And what have we done for them?" She paused, and there were murmurs in the group of gathered monsters as they considered her words. "That's right: NOT MUCH. So we have this falling thing going around. The humans are scared that it might spread to them and they have asked ONE single thing of us. They want us to stay here until a cure is found to keep both us and them safe." The gathered monsters looked ashamed; the makeshift signs abandoned as they listened to Undyne speak. A familiar grin spread across her face, the crowd waiting eagerly for her next words. I couldn't help but mirror that grin as she continued to speak.
"So why don't we show them just how safe we can be? We'll wait here. We'll find a cure. And then they'll take the quarantine down… AND WE'LL SHOW THEM JUST WHAT THEY WERE MISSING BLOCKING US IN HERE!" She raised a triumphant fist into the air, letting out an over the top shout that the monsters gathered echoed. There were tears of joy, shouts of exuberance… A vulkin even erupted, dispersing a number of monsters. The excitement was building… there was no stopping the hype. The monsters were one in this. "GO UNDYNE!" I shouted through cupped hands. "And we are monsters! We are united, we have love, and we ALWAYS support one another! WE MOVE ON TOGETHER OR WE DON'T GO AT ALL! This is something that the humans are decidedly lacking! Who else will teach them these things but US?" There were shouts of agreement, the monsters so enraptured by Undyne's speech that it was all they knew! 'UNDYNE! UNDYNE!' they stomped and shouted in support. "So be sure to wash your…appendages. Don't share food. Uh… WHAT AM I DOING. I HAVE A SPEAR IN MY HAND. I AM A FIGHTER. DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE THE ANSWERS? GO ASK THE STAFF AT ALPHYS LAB! THEY KNOW THAT STUFF!?" Startled by the outburst, the protesting monsters quickly scattered, presumably headed home or to 'find more information' as Undyne had stated.
I subtly pushed my jaw back into place before approaching a rather embarrassed looking Undyne. She was… so cool! She didn't need my help at all! "UNDYNE! THAT WAS SO AWESOME! YOU DIDN'T EVEN NEED ME!" I exclaimed, bouncing up and down like a baby bones with exuberance. I, the Great Papyrus, refused to be left out of the hype after all! "Hah… well… it could've turned violent at any time. You know how pissed the monsters get about being blocked in after the barrier. Hell, I'm pissed about it; but I don't get to be pissed like they do. I have to be an example." She sighed with the revelation, imparting just the slightest of the burden she carried with her position to me as she slid down to sit on top of the boulder.
"And didn't need you? 'Course I did. You're my best friend and you're just so freaking… positive. Pumps me up, you know? Plus, if things did turn violent you could've stopped them with those blue bones of yours." My eyes widened with shock as she reached out to give me a hearty pat on the shoulder. Undyne… motivated by me? I helped her? "But enough of that mushy stuff! We need more of that POSITIVITY! GO SPREAD THAT POSITIVITY TO THE OTHER MONSTERS! NYEAAAUGH!" She hopped to her feet, enthusiastically chucking a spear dangerously close to my boots. "U-UNDYNE! YES MA'AM!" I rushed over to the bromobile before any more spears could be thrown my way.
To begin my quest of spreading positivity, I resolved myself to first check on my brother who needed it the most. He would need to be moved to his room and I'd need to begin chores, after all. Only then could I begin to spread positivity to the other monsters. The drive home was uneventful, and as I walked into the house nothing seemed out of the ordinary; the stifling silence having becoming the norm months ago. What was unusual was that I couldn't feel Sans' presence nearby. It was unlike him to…well, go anywhere. "SANS? ARE YOU HERE?" I called out as I walked over to turn on the lights. The blanket was left haphazardly hanging from the couch and draped onto the floor with no sign of Sans. "BROTHER?" Becoming increasingly worried at his absence, I quickly rushed up the stairs. Maybe he was in his room? But… with how he was acting lately, it was unusual that he would've gone anywhere. He had no energy, slept all day…
A sense of dread sprung up within me as I took slow steps towards the door of Sans' room. I certainly hadn't closed his door yesterday, so he… had to be behind it. Maybe… maybe our spaghetti and MTT night helped him? I pushed back the image of Sans in his lab, a syringe of red liquid held before his slowly crumbling soul and a sense of hopelessness in his expression. We'd… moved beyond that, right? Sans wouldn't hurt himself; he promised after all and he was a monster who strived to never break promises. He's…going to be alright. I repeated that mantra in my head as I put an unsteady hand on the door knob. Twisting the knob, I pushed the door open as it relented with a creak.
The room was dark when I entered it and I squinted as my eye sockets adjusted to the dimness. Feeling along the wall, I flicked on the light switch, a suffocating feeling of fear for what I would see. There, in the center of the room, was Sans… lying in the center of a disheveled room, furniture and belongings strewn everywhere as if they had been pushed away from him. From a distance, it looked as if he was only asleep; having collapsed on the spot. The bottle of ketchup I'd left him earlier was right there with him, broken and ketchup ominously spread across the floor in a puddle. I was immediately alarmed, quickly rushing to his side despite the glass that cut into my bones painfully. I desperately hoped it was only a bad night terror, as he tended to lash out with magic when he was reminded of some of his worse timelines.
"SANS!" I shouted, scooping him into my arms and shaking him. He was limp in my embrace, his face troubled as if he were having a bad dream despite the deceptive grin that always persisted. When he didn't respond, I began to panic. Normally I would be the calm and collected monster… but when it came to my brother… "SANS! PLEASE! THIS ISN'T FUNNY!" I shouted desperately, praying it was only a prank pulled in poor taste. When he didn't wake up, I tried the only thing I thought might help. Calling what little magic I had to me, I reached out towards his soul to heal with love like I had once before… only for it to have no effect. His soul was unresponsive; the magic bouncing off it like a pebble in a current. It simply appeared before me, floating gently above his body in response to the magic; a dull dark blue inverted heart with no familiar glow or hum of magic.
I always feared the day that Sans wouldn't wake up at all. He… wasn't going to wake up, was he? With the realization setting in, tears of grief formed in my eyesockets. "BROTHER! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME HERE ALONE!" I sobbed into his jacket mournfully, my thoughts sluggish with panic overtaking them. I… had to call for help. Someone could help me. Doing the only thing I knew how in the moment, I took my cell phone shakily from a pocket in my battle suit and dialed Undyne's number.
…Gently rocking my brother back and forth like a fallen child, I waited for her to answer. Ring. Ring. Ring. I was beginning to lose hope…until she picked up on the final ring. "It's Undyne, what do you want? I'm busy right now!" A stressed out sounding Undyne questioned on the other end. "U-UNDYNE! I NEED HELP! IT'S SANS! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! PLEASE HELP HIM! SANS, SANS! PLEASE WAKE UP!" I babbled into the reception, tears streaming down my face and my bones uncontrollably shaking as I begged Sans to come back. I still hadn't accepted… that my brother, Sans, hero of the Underground who sacrificed everything he had for me and the others had fallen. And with the way things were looking, he'd probably never wake up.