{Author notes}
… Wow, just wow. I really didn't expect people to like this story so much one the first chapter.
No seriously, I am amazed since this is my first time writing anything romantically oriented… and it's with comedy!
Well as you guys noted, (mostly "quickquantumquasar") the pacing of this story is… fast and doesn't explain things properly. (And I'd like to thank a random guest for pointing out that I misspelled a word.) I will do my best to do explain things better and work more toward making the pacing better.
But I would like you guys to also know that this story was made for fun. I was hoping that the simple idea of Ruby being more confused than usual would already tell you this would be one of those stories that stretches their characters a little too far albeit teetering within the edges of their character.
In layman's terms, I was kind of being lazy in the pacing and explanations. I didn't want to dramatically change the character's personalities though. I just wanted to bend them in a way that makes the situation all worse.
"Ruby! Wait!" Jaune screamed tiredly. For something akin to the fifth time straight, whenever he and Ren would catch up to Ruby who was catching a break from using her semblance for some unknown reason, she would activate her semblance again and run away from them like a scared little rabbit.
The two boys stopped and gasped for breath as their ally raced out of their sight once again.
"I-I don't get it. Why is she running from us?" Jaune wondered out loud, thinking he was speaking for the both of them.
Ren felt this undying need to tell Jaune that there was a good chance that Ruby had read the letter and assumed it to be his confession to her. He briefly thought about telling Jaune this, yet he couldn't help but imagine Jaune thinking he was just joking. The sad thing was that Jaune's obliviousness would put cartoon characters to shame, and that the chance of him actually doing the previously mentioned action was ridiculously high.
Then he thought about telling Ruby this the next time they caught up with her, but there also was the risk that she didn't read it and they would be exposing the privacy of the two the letter was truly meant for. While this risk was starting to look very unlikely, Ren begrudgingly decided to confirm this after a few more facts rather than doing it for the sake of making things easier on himself.
They still needed that letter Ruby had.
Meanwhile…
Weiss stared at the letter she had.
She was walking aimlessly around the hallways as she reread what could have been anything but a love letter.
"P-preposterous! T-this must be some misunderstanding! Why would Ruby say she l-l-l-lo-love me? I honestly believed she was—wait… is this all Yang's doing? … That must be the case! Oh that brutish sister of hers, making such unrefined pranks! This time you've gone too far, Xiao Long!"
In a fit of rage, Weiss rushed toward where the brawler currently was. She also proceeded to politely drop the letter in the nearest trash can before angrily striding her way towards her blonde teammate. After all, even when she was mad, Weiss Schnee was always poise.
However, she didn't know that she was being followed the entire time of walking miserably down the halls.
Nora Valkyrie, or what she liked to presently be known as Agent B-00P, was seen sneakily taking out the letter out of the trash.
The hyperactive girl had recently watched a marathon of spy flicks late last night, much to the charge in of her teammates during a school night, and she still influenced by said marathon even up to now. She tackled the day pretending that she was a spy or secret agent, ready to find any juicy conspiracy or unexpected betrayal in her daily surroundings. And maybe find a hot guy friend that she could seduce... as long as he fit the descriptions of having magenta eyes and highlighted magenta hair.
Anyway, as if the universe was setting the timer to the explosion itself, Nora happened to stumble upon a flushed and disheveled Weiss as she walked down the halls reading what looked to be a love letter from random glimpses.
From there, she decided to spy/follow/stalk Weiss. Then she learned some rather interesting tidbits about her and 'Ruby's feelings'. She doesn't judge after all.
Eventually, she was there when she spotted the girl toss away the letter in the trash.
Her brilliant explosion oriented mind started to crank. Since Weiss didn't need that love letter anymore, maybe she could use it for something else! The spy marathons did also show those resourceful newbies that had to rely on everyday objects to topple master organizations no matter how blown out of proportion they were!
Then Nora realized that the love letter was actually the ultimate key in saving the world, or in this case starting up her most brilliant plan ever.
This was her chance to make her move to Operation: Arkos.
Later…
Pyrrha Nykkos was walking down an aisle. She found herself holding a beautiful bouquet and wearing the most wonderful wedding dress she had ever seen. She looked ahead of her and saw the back of a familiar blonde boy wearing a suit that stood in front of a priest.
Her heart skipped several beats as she finally reached the end of the aisle, and found Jaune Arc smiling kindly at her. He took her hand and placed a ring on her finger, signaling how they would forever be bound in holy matrimony. The priest started talking, but Pyrrha wasn't listening she was still to happily shocked at what was happening to her. A piece of her wanted to know what was going on, but a stronger side of her was refusing to act out and let the events play.
Jaune leaned in to kiss her. Pyrrha did the same.
Then she woke up before their lips could connect.
Pyrrha felt a little disappointed that it was all a dream, even if it was a rather nice dream. Then she realized that she had decided to take an afternoon nap due to Nora keeping everyone in their team up late at night with the loud explosions and rather catchy spy theme music.
There really was no need to worry though. Her schedule was free around this time and she could afford to simply relax for the day.
She turned herself over to opposite side of her bed, and was surprised to see a letter perched near her head on the pillow she was using. It seemed to be addressed to her and it looked to be written from… Jaune? Wait, why would he write a letter to her? Why not text her over their scrolls or simply talk to her in person?
Wondering what her leader wrote down in the envelope, and not noticing the silent and contained giggles from a hidden source in her own team room, Pyrrha opened up the letter and read it.
Nora smiled even wider as she saw the Spartan shot up from her bed with a flushed faced as red as both her and Ruby's hair combined.
Then Pyrrha stood up dramatically. She gasped as she looked to have read the final line.
'This was it!' Thought Nora excitedly, 'This is the part were Pyrrha dashes off and admits her love to Jaune, and he realizes that he likes her too after the dance! Then they will start dating, have kids, get married in a shot-gun wedding, and stay in love till they become old, wrinkly, and cute! … Exactly in that order!'
Yes, nothing could stop her dream pair from finally being realized. Not even Pyrrha losing control of her pupils, then body, then balance, and then attempting to swoon into the floor—oh wait.
"Oh no! Pyrrha!" Nora cried as she came out of her hiding spot under her own bed to catch the felled Spartan, defeated by poetry.
Alas… the pen was mightier than the sword.
"How could this have happened?" Nora cried, starting to monologue from a different movie that went along with the spy marathons. "I was sure that she would be so excited she would finally admit her feelings to Jaune, so he could stop flirting with Weiss! … No, what if I was the fool?! Maybe the letter was designed to somehow secretly drive the gap further between my two favorite ships?!" No, it wasn't. "Dr. Nefarious is playing his cards well, but he will not stop me, Agent B-00P! I need to get rid of the evidence before things get worse…" She finished as she stared at a certain letter out of an envelope.
But how could she do it? First of all was to get rid of the envelope. Her imaginary 'Them/evil organization' could probably trace it back to her since she was the one who forged the envelope. If they did, she wouldn't be able to protect her friends, who clearly are able to take care of themselves and sometimes her as well, from their wrath like in every other super hero movie in existence.
That was easy enough though, she just ate it.
But now how would she get rid of the letter? The organization might trace it back to Weiss and Ruby—wait! Team RWBY…
Nora knew how to get rid of the letter.
Meanwhile…
Blake was enjoying reading one of her favorite books. It was a good time to do so anyway, Yang was away in class, Ruby and Weiss weren't there, but none of the two were curious enough to inquire what she was reading anyway. Zwei, the little Grimm in disguise, was carefully napping under Weiss bed, and far away from her as possible.
She was reading about another mystery oriented story about a boy named Helios trapped in a boarding ocean school with his enigmatic and charismatic older male teacher Gerindo. Together they must figure out the secrets of the Merman before a dark curse falls on Helios.
…
Yes, mystery. Clothes, mostly shirts that have only restricted male six packs, have always hindered the main character's ability to solve problems faster as well as a lacking amount of half naked volleyball scenes written in explicit detail.
BOOM!
"Kyah!" Blake yelped in surprise. She usually would have heard someone a few steps before even reaching the door, but she was far to engrossed with some twists both the book and the characters had shown. She slammed the "mystery" book close faster than Ruby's semblance and hid it in that very instant.
Apparently, Nora had just kicked down their door with an eerily familiar spy theme in the far background. Then she quickly tumbled into their room, opened up their window, and threw away something a good distance away.
"BOOYAH! TAKE THAT! Oh hi, Blake. How are you doing?" Nora politely asked as the music abruptly stopped as soon as Nora's tone changed.
"… Fine?" The Faunus replied unsurely. How did Ren always deal with such a girl?
"Well bye, and if you see anyone else… 'wink wink'… tell me all about it, K?" Nora failed to realize that her 'spy talk' was only coherent for her, but she happily skipped over a broken doorway on her way out.
Blake stared at doorway a few seconds after Nora had left. It wasn't because she was dumbfounded. It was because dumbfounded at Nora. Things were always lively in Beacon, and sure some of the greatest of fighters had somewhat eccentric personalities sometimes border lining that of sociopathic or psychopathic tendencies, but Nora always seemed to amaze everyone with her personality every other hour except Ren.
Blake sighed and jumped off her bed. "Great, that's the third door this month." She complained as she briefly recalled Yang being the cause of the other two times.
She stretched out of the window to close it before making her way to the Principal's office. She had another damage report to fill out.
Meanwhile…
Weiss was hopping mad. "What do you mean you had nothing to do with this?!"
"I'm telling you Ice Princess," Yang spoke as she shamelessly changed back into her uniform in front of her in the locker room. "I don't know anything about a love letter… people actually still give those anyway?"
"Don't change the subject! What kind of prank is this to have your own sister give that pile of twisted poetry to me!?"
"Hey! I would never orchestrate such a low quality prank!" She emphasized proudly while half dressed. "Oh and I wouldn't put my own sister in harm's way and stuff like that too," She said this with less emphasis. Then her eyes widened and a playful smirk curled up her lips. "Wait a sec…"
Weiss had a terrible feeling she knew her teammate was doing.
"Why are you so annoyed over this love letter anyway? If it was a joke, why are you making more fuss than usual?" She asked calmly but there was a twinkle of mirthful pleasure in her lilac eyes.
"B-but what if it isn't!?"
"Well, if it was so serious, you could maturely answer her no, and still retain your friendship. After all, I'm sure Weiss Schnee could do something as simple as that."
Weiss was now scared. Yang Xiao Long was actually giving good advice.
"But I'm wondering why you were so flustered in the first place?" Yang wrapped her arms around Weiss and pulled her closer, much to the discomfort of the heiress since Yang still hadn't fully clothed herself in the school uniform. (She had not yet put on her outer blouse, you sick pervs.) "I mean as fun as trying to date someone of the same gender is sounds… meh, I think I prefer stringing guys a lot better. But you?"
"W-what about me?"
"Ice Princess, you actually thought about it. Maybe you aren't as smitten with Neptune as you thought you were…"
Weiss blushed furiously. Was she trying to imply that she was…!? Preposterous!
"Preposterous!" Weiss yelled, trying to pull herself away from Yang. "I'll have you know that Ruby and I are just friends and I think highly of Neptune!"
Pretending to be taken aback, Yang questioned Wiess, "What? Are you saying my little sister isn't attractive?!"
"Stop twisting my words, Xiao Long!" Weiss managed to break free of Yang while blushing furiously at all the teasing.
Thinking that she had enough teasing for now, Yang shrugged her shoulders and finally placed on her coat. "OK then. Just talk to Ruby about it. Bye-bye!" Then with a signature peace sign, she left the girls locker room leaving Weiss more confused and angrier than before.
…
'That cur!' Weiss thought. 'Who does she think she is suggesting that I'm… bah! Who would like such a scythe obsessed, cookie eating, peppy little, red haired, adorable, prodigy that always brought the best in everyone!?'
…
Weiss then noticed that somewhere in her thoughts she had changed her opinion of Ruby somewhere.
Weiss then realized there was actually… a lot… to like about Ruby.
'What am I thinking!? I'm not…' She paused in deep silence for a few seconds. "… Am I?"
A little while ago…
Before Weiss was started to question her *seCoughxualityCough*, we look back to when Nora threw away the letter out the dorm window of Team RWBY.
The crumpled ball hit a certain boy with blue hair that wore goggles in the head.
"Huh?" Neptune Vasilias felt the piece of paper bounce of his head and he reached out with his hand to catch it mid re bound. "What's this?"
Instinctively, Neptune traced his eyes where his mind automatically calculated where the piece of paper would have come from, and his mind recognized the most likely place was intriguingly the RWBY Dorm, a place he recognized well since he almost fell from trying to break into it with his partner.
Speaking of his partner, Sun Wukong, it just so happened that Neptune saw the interest of his partner, Blake Belladonna, at the open window of their dorm room. They both briefly made eye contact before Blake closed the window to her dorm.
"What is this thing anyway?" Neptune, with a flick of his wrist un crumpled the paper—yes, he was that cool enough to un crumple paper. Deal with it. Then he fatefully read the message on the piece of industrialized tree.
"Oh. My. Dust…" Neptune disbelievingly looked back at the window where he saw his best friend's current crush. "Sun will kill me if he finds out. It sucks being this cool."
{Author's notes}
I hope the pacing was a little better in this one.
As it turns out the letter is making far more trouble than we originally thought. Also, a certain someone is questioning their 'preferences'…
Hopefully the characters wouldn't be too OOC, save for Neptune's ability to un crumple paper. For some reason, I just think that would fit with him… what? I'm the only one that thinks that? … Err… I invoke the rule of romantic comedy # 42.4!
Jaune: Pretty sure that doesn't exist.
Hush! You're character is somewhat ironic to say that!
Jaune: Wait, I'm pretty sure that's not how you use ironic.
It confuses me OK!? I'm ending this now! BYE THANKS FOR READING!