ASHLEY'S P.O.V
Shit this isn't going to end well.
"Look you ass..."
I watch Zara as she steps between them.
"Glen I think it's best you just turn around and forget you saw us here"
"Zara please?"
"Leave now Glen"
"Come on Zara I just want to talk to her?"
I lean across so my lips are next to Spencer's ear.
"Spencer if you want to leave just say the word"
She turns so she's facing me.
"You're sweet Ash but I'm okay"
"Are you sure?"
She leans across pressing her lips against mine.
"Spencer I'm incredibly turned on right now"
I'm whispering so the others can't hear.
"Ash you're always incredibly turned on"
When she says that I start laughing.
"That's true"
"Spencer?"
He's pretty persistant.
"Can we please talk?"
"I'm not interested"
"Please Spencer just hear me out and then I promise I'll leave you alone"
"Glen?"
"Zara it's fine"
I like knowing Zara's looking out for her.
"Alright well we're going to go over there"
I watch Zara as she drags Maddy away.
"Glen just say what you need to say"
He's shitting himself.
"I ummm..."
He's mumbling.
"Spencer I am so sorry"
I've never officially met Glen.
But I know enough about him to know that I really don't like him.
"If I could go back and have my time again I'd do everything differently"
"I'm happy for you Glen"
"Spencer I hate myself for the way I treated you"
He should hate himself.
"Spencer I really am sorry and I want to make things right"
"Do you feel better now Glen?"
This isn't going to be pretty.
"Do you feel better now you've got all of that off your chest?"
"No I..."
"Glen there's nothing you can do or say that will change the way I feel about you"
"Spencer I never meant..."
"You made my life a misery"
"I know I..."
"You outted me even when I begged you not to"
"Spencer I'm so sorry..."
"You're not sorry Glen"
"Spencer I..."
"You told the whole fucking school I was gay?"
I didn't know that.
"For six months you and your friends gave me shit about being gay and even when dad died you didn't stop"
"Spencer I'm not that person anymore..."
"I don't give two shits what kind of person you are"
I know she doesn't want me to feel sorry for her but I can't help it.
"Please Spencer I just want to make things right?"
"Well I don't"
Noone should have to go through everything she's been through.
"So I'm going to tell you this one last time and then you can just go on living your life and I'll go on living mine"
He looks like a deer caught in headlights.
"Glen there's absolutely nothing you can say or do that will me make me change my mind about you"
I'm a little caught off guard when she reaches out wrapping her fingers around mine.
"You're dead to me Glen"
He definately wasn't expecting that.
"You mean nothing to me"
When she looks over at me I'm worried.
"Let's go"
I don't say anything as she leads me through the crowd.
"Spencer?"
She keeps walking until we get to the bathroom.
"Ash I know what you're going to say"
I keep following her as she drags me into the first stall.
"I..."
I stop her when she tries to kiss me.
"We're different now Spence"
I wave my hand between us.
"I love this side of us Spencer but what we have isn't just us fooling around anymore"
"I know"
"I need to know you're okay"
I really care about her.
"So when I ask I'm kind of expecting an answer"
I reach out brushing my fingers through her hair.
"You don't get to just blow me off anymore"
She drives me crazy.
"You don't get to just shut me out and tell me the porsche is at the shop"
She's smiling.
"Spencer if we want this to work we've got to give this whole honesty thing a go and see where it gets us"
"Ash I want this to work"
I was really hoping she'd say that.
"And I didn't mean to blow you off this is all just... embarassing"
"Why?"
What does she have to be embarassed about?
"We haven't exactly been following the script Ash we've been doing everything back to front"
That's true.
"We slept together and then we got to know eachother"
When she says that I force a smile.
"Spencer I like that we don't follow a script"
When she looks down at her feet I lift her chin up so her eyes are locked on mine.
"Why's it embarassing?"
"Ash you're so confident and with you what you see is what you get"
I can see the tears building up in her eyes.
"But with me there's this whole other side of me that I'm hiding from"
"Spence..."
"It's embarassing Ash"
She has no reason to be embarassed.
"I'm weak"
"Spencer you're not weak"
"Ashley I'm twenty four years old and I can't get over what happened when I was sixteen"
"Spence..."
"It's been eight fucking years Ashley and I'm still just as fucked up as I was when it happened"
She's not fucked up.
"Why can't I get over this?"
I hate seeing her like this.
"Why does he still have this effect on me?"
When she says that a tear rolls down her cheek.
"Come here"
I reach out wrapping my arms around her.
"Ash this isn't what I want"
When she pulls back my heart starts racing.
"I really don't want to be the emotional wreck you feel sorry for"
How can I not feel sorry for her?
"I like what we have Ash"
I like what we have as well.
"But this was alot easier when you didn't know about the fucked up side of me"
"Do you regret telling me?"
"No I don't I just..."
She reaches up cupping my cheek in her hand.
"I regret how I've made this into such a big deal"
I slowly lean forward pressing my lips against hers.
"Spencer you don't need to be someone you're not when you're around me"
She's smiling.
"Okay can we please forget my little freak out?"
"No"
This time when I pull her in for a hug she doesn't pull back.
"So are you going to answer my question now?"
When I say that she start laughing.
"I'm more than alright Ash"
"No more tears?"
"It was one tear Ash"
It was still a tear.
"And there was something in my eye"
I have the biggest smile on my face when she pulls back.
"If you say so Spence"
I reach out cupping her cheeks in my hands.
"Where were we?"
I quickly lean forward moving her lips against mine.