"You wanted to say something?" He crosses his arms as he slightly turns his head.
I thought the words over and carefully pick them before I speak, trying to be somewhat convincing. "About what happened the other night, I don't-"
"I like you, Jaclyn." He interrupts me, taking a step forward as I walk backwards until I bump against a tree. He slams his hand against it, next to my face as he leans in. "Do you regret it?" He asks with a frown as if he'd be disappointed.
I can't help but stare at those lips that remind me of yesterday night. Those lips that closed around mine and left bite marks on my skin. I can remember his touch and warm body as if he is reaching out for me right now. I swallow hard as I look up to his eyes. "I don't... that's not it." I say as I look down and curse myself. Really? I have trouble speaking right now?
Levi lifts my chin as my eyes are still glued onto the ground. "Look at me." He demands. I slowly open them and directly look into his. Slowly he comes closer as he hold my face in place and I wait in anticipation for what's next.
I know I should move, I can't send him away, say no, just to kiss him again.
But I don't force myself to move as his lips slightly touch mine. His soft ones are pressed against mine and I feel a shiver run up my spine. Our tongues meet halfway as they twirl around each other. I yearn for more, it's as if my senses come to life whenever he touches me.
He suddenly breaks the kiss and wipe my mouth with my thumb. This isn't exactly what I had planned.
"Do you regret it this time?" He asks and I realise where he was going with that kiss.
I grab his hand from my hip and hold it in front of me with both hands. "You're an exceptional kisser, I'll give you that- but like I said, I can't. I'm sorry." I let him go and start to walk away towards the grass field where the others are sitting.
When I turn around to look over my shoulder, he leans against the tree with his arms crossed, a smirk marking his face. I stop and turn around. "What?"
He pushes himself away from the tree, walking as he stops next to me. "Clearly you're lying, but I respect your choice either way." He says and walks in front.
I sigh as I smile. I'm sure I wasn't that convincing. I don't know if I wanted him to believe me anyway.
When I sit on the ground next to Jonah and Gunther I see Levi walking into the building.
"There are the newly graduated trainees." Jonah points to the little crowd and I look at the line of people standing there. I'm sitting with the squad, Jonah and Hanji outside at the front of the building. It's already late afternoon and we are enjoying this rare day off.
I don't really pay attention to the people standing there but a vivid, ginger hair color stands out. "That can't be…" I squint my eyes, trying to get the image clearer and when the person I dreaded it to be, turns around, I am sure. "Don't tell me, she… joined?" I asked out loud to myself, my eyes going wide. Suddenly her eyes lock onto mine as if she knew I would be right here. A broad smile covers her face and she's happily waving to me.
"You know her?" Eld asks and I hesitantly nod.
The group saluted and then everyone went into a different direction as she runs up to us. I stand up, fists already bawled and trying to contain my anger. "What the hell are you doing here!?" I ask her, smile slowly fading and she slows her pace before coming to a halt before me.
"I… eh I…" She fumbles her fingers as she looks to her feet. When she forcefully lifts her gaze to face me she speaks the sentence fast as if she just accidentally spilled a secret. "I joined the Survey Corps." Now again avoiding my piercing glare.
"No." I said and she immediately looks up again.
"But Jaclyn I can-"
"I said no." I don't let her finish whatever she had to say.
She frowns at me and throws her hands over each other, breathing in deeply. "You can't stop me." She looks directly into my eyes but I see that her face was tense and hesitant to my respond.
"April Lyn Smith." Her name is being called out and I turn around, seeing Levi standing at the entrance of the building with a paper in his hand.
"Yes!" She says and raises her hand.
"Come with me." Levi calls as his frame disappears into the dark inside.
"What the meaning of this?" I ask and grab her arm. "Why are you here?"
She shakes me off. "I'll talk to you later, okay?" She says and runs off inside before I am able to say another word.
I sit back onto the ground. Why the hell is April here, how is that even possible? It should take a year for her to complete the training, it's impossible they would let her in.
"Who's that?" Oluo then asks and I turn my head to him. Everyone looks in absolute confusion and I join them. I too, have no idea what is going on,
Why the hell she is here and why Levi would ask her to follow him.
"A friend." I answer, remembering being asked a question. I stand up and walking towards the building.
"Where are you going" Jonah asked.
"To find her."
X
April
"Thank you Erwin!" I say gratefully and close the door behind me.
Levi walks before, flipping pages as he glanced over the notebook he's holding. "Let's see, you will be assigned to my squad, but only for this one upcoming expedition, from then on you'll be in a different squad." He says and glances over his shoulder.
I stop in my tracks. "Yes, about that…" I start tentatively as he turns around completely.
"What is it?" He asks and when I stare into his eyes there is this strange thing going on again, just like back then in the woods.
"Assign me to an other squad, please." I ask for the favour.
He seems confused as he squints his eyes. "I thought putting you two together is what you both would've wanted?"
"I'm certain it's what she wants." I lift my eyes to lock them with his again. "I just don't want to be a burden to her. If I will be placed into the same group as Jaclyn it will be the death of her." I state bluntly. "She will only be focused on keeping me save, that's not the issue but I can't let it happen that she gets killed in the process of doing so." I unconsciously hold my breath while awaiting his answer that takes too long for my liking. "Please, Levi. I know you probably don't care but I just want both of us to survive!" I nearly plead when he didn't answer.
He turns around again and walks forward. "Fine, but if she doesn't agree herself, I will put you both in my squad. It's the best I can offer you."
X
She slams her hands onto the table at which Levi is seated. "It's the least you can do, weren't you the one that had told me to rethink it all!" She says and he remains silent, swiftly glancing over to me as I swallow tightly.
I didn't have any intention of dragging Levi into this, but so far he has been playing along, as if he was the one that made the choice of putting us separate. What she'll do once she finds out… I don't think I want to know.
"Jaclyn It's fine I-" The words die on my lips once her furious expression is directed towards me, it's a reminder of how scary she can be at times.
She then walks out of the room without another word. "I'll go talk to her!" I say to Levi, remembering that if I don't convince her, he won't agree with my request. I hurry past the empty hallways in search of her. "She can be so stubborn." I murmur.
When I run past an open door I do a few steps back to take a glance inside. I see her sitting by the window, staring outside. She throws her knife in the air, catching it and repeating the ritual like she does when she's stressed. Suddenly she turns her head when she noticed my figure and stopped her movements, jamming the knife into the wooden table.
"It's fine, I'll manage." I enter the small room and start my nearly impossible mission of convincing her.
"Why do you want to do this?" She asks and squints her eyes at me suspiciously. "You know, it won't help with the job. So why do it?" When I don't have an immediate answer she continues. "Do you even realize? It's like a suicide mission, soldiers dropped like flies, I saw it for myself."
"Isn't this why I became stronger, I also want to fight alongside you!" I try.
"Then at least fight beside me!" I see that she already has enough trouble accepting that. "If we're in the same squad I can protec-"
"No Jaclyn." I interrupt her before inhaling deeply. "I might not be fighting with you but I won't be alone, no matter what squad they'll put me in. I want to do this, I also want to be around you more."
Not impressed by my words she stands up and walks over to me. "This way you might never see me again." She says calmly.
I look down to my feet and bawl my fists painfully. "Don't say such a thing!" I yell. I can feel the tears coming to the surface, gathering and ready to pour down. "Didn't you tell me I need to make mistakes in order to learn?" I slowly look up to her and she grabs my shoulders as she eyes me.
"Throwing your live away like this won't be a lesson!" She nearly yells back but she's restraining herself from doing so. "If that's really what's behind it, wanting to fight alongside me and spending more time together. Isn't it better to have something certain rather than taking a risk for more?" Her voice lowers and her expression also softens.
Right… I can wait for her to return and everything will be back to normal, but her making it alive from the missions is one obstacle. Second thing is, if she does complete the job, will nobody find out? Won't she be discovered and thrown in jail, or worse, executed? I open my mouth again but it feels like my voice has died. When I do speak, my voice is soft and croaked. "Please Jaclyn, trust me enough… trust my strength enough for me to join."
I am joining either way but it will ease my mind, knowing she only has to watch her own back out there. I just want her to believe in me and my capability. That's something that matters a lot to me as someone who has been looking up to her like a sister. A moment of silence passes and I glance up to her dubious face. I notice a swift movement and I peer over her shoulder to Levi who is standing in the threshold, leaning against the door while he has his arms crossed. How long has he been standing there?
"You're honestly bothersome." She slams the palm of her hand against her forehead. "You will be training with me every day until the expedition date, I don't care if Levi agrees or not, it's that or I won't agree."
"Really?" I say exited and look past her to Levi who nods a single time as a small smile forms on his lips. He gracefully turns on his heel and within one movement he disappears around the corner again. Jaclyn follows my gaze and I yell. "Fine!" Trying to get her attention away from the now empty hallway. "Thank you!" I beam at her and hug her tightly. She rolls her eyes at me and groans in annoyance, but despite that, she is smiling. The faintest of smiles, but it is sincere.
"We don't have time to waste, training starts right now." She pushes me out of the room and we head outside again.
"You're kidding, right?" I ask but somewhere I know that, unfortunately she isn't.
"Did you say something?" She pulls her brow up.
I press my lips into a straight line. "I said fine." I fake smile but then burst out in a real laugh.
"That's what I thought." She says and I notice the boy we saw in the woods.
"Isn't that him from last time?" I ask as I point towards him.
"Jonah." She calls him and immediately he turns around. "You got some spare time?"
X
Jaclyn
"Really Jaclyn?" They say in unison and look at each other surprised before their gaze is directed to me again.
"What? Can't handle a bit of an audience?" I say as I let myself fall to the ground, leaning against a tree.
Hanji, Mike, Levi and the squad are here, sitting outside since the weather is perfect during the evening hours. A pleasant warm breeze and the sun close to the horizon.
I figured that since they both can use some training, I'll make it a bit more fun and put a little pressure on the both of them. The fact that they frown and stand before each other with their arms crossed brings a smile to my face.
"Go!" I yell and before Jonah even processed the words he lays on the ground, completely dazzled by how fast he went down.
"April." I say and she knows what I mean, she reaches out and pulls Jonah back to his feet.
"Just why do I have to fight against a spy?" She says irritated and looks over to me.
"I told you already I wasn't spying!" He tries to defend himself. I then noticed Levi walking outside, also joining the rest.
I chuckle at their pointless dialogue.
"The purpose of this is to improve your skills, now go!" I say and this time Jonah is somewhat prepared as April missed her first blow.
Now I see what Jonah meant by saying that her movements reminded her of me, they are actually very much alike. Usually it was her battling me so I wouldn't notice it, but seeing it from a distance I realize he is right.
They both manage to stand upright for a good minute, now it's time to give them instructions. "Jonah stop avoiding her attacks, block them and avoid a follow up from her." I say and he immediately did like I instructed, improving on the spot.
"April, make more efficient and direct moves; go for the vital points only." I observed their flaws and again, Jonah is the fallen one.
She grabs his arm and pulls him up, directly standing back into fighting position. "Again?" Jonah asks, slightly panting.
"Till you win." April smirks as she motions with her fingers towards herself, daring for him to make the first move.
"Exactly something Jaclyn would say." He smiles. "Fine then, till I win." He says more confident and determined.
They go for round three. April's movements are close to perfection and Jonah went down yet another time. "You're improving already." I try to encourage him.
"Yet I still won't win." He says but the determination is still present in his voice. He stands up again with his arms lifted. I can see April is starting to get tired too but she stands, ready to strike while her eyes never left Jonah. She never loses focus and is just as determined to win every time. She has surprised me with how much she has improved in the time I wasn't there to train with her. The mistakes she used to make were barely noticeable and it makes me feel more at ease, the slightest bit, but it is something.
"This time listen to me closely. Again!" And off they go, this time I'll advise Jonah to his victory, but still he is the one that has to pull it off.
"Use your surroundings!" He quickly glances around and knows what I mean. He jumps backwards, out of April's sight behind a tree and turns again, launching his fist at her face. April is startled but regains her composure quickly. "Don't give her time to recover!" He takes a step forward and launches his fists, one after another and now it is April that has to block his attacks.
"Good. Next time she blocks, use your legs." It's like you can see his brains work while he moves around, highly focused on his and April's movements while he tries to take in the advice. He goes straight for her face and April stops it by crossing her arms in front of her face. She knows what's next but is in a powerless position to do anything about it. Jonah swept her off her feet by kicking her ankles and she fell backwards.
The frown disappeared from his face as he looked over to me with a broad smile. "Ah! I finally won!" He celebrates his little personal victory.
"Good job Jonah!" Hanji and Petra cheer in unison.
I lock eyes with Jonah and glance over to April who is still lying on the ground. Just like she had done with him, he pulls her to her feet. He scratches the back of his head and then slightly bows it. "Thank you for practicing with me." He says gratefully.
She throws her arms over each other and looks away, closing her eyes. She then opens one to look at him. "You're a worthy candidate to battle with." She grins and gives him a friendly punch to his shoulder.
With a smile on my face I watch them. I sit with my legs pulled up and my arms leaning over my knees.
"Impressive." A little surprised I look to the right and see Levi sitting by my side. "You're a good trainer."
"Scaring me like that again?" I breathe out and slap his leg. "And I wouldn't call myself a trainer."
"Then what would you call that?" He asks with his brow pulled up.
"Simply advising a friend." I say and he sarcastically nods.
I'm honestly very happy he didn't talk about what happened yesterday night, or about the kiss this morning, or me getting angry at him this afternoon. I huff as I shake my head unnoticeably. He treats me, the situation like nothing has happened and it makes things easier for me too.
"Jaclyn!" April yells and u tear my gaze away from Levi as I let my thoughts rest for now.
"Your turn!" Jonah adds.
"My turn for what?" I ask confused but as soon as I see her grin I know what she is getting at. "No." Is my answer and I stand up, walking towards the others.
"Your turn to battle of course!" She dares to say and the amusement is present in her voice. The little brat is trying to get back at me. She runs and stands beside me, leaning her arm onto my shoulder. "Let see… fight Hanji?" She peers up to me. How did she already know her name?
Hanji laughs and holds her hands in front of her. "I'll pass!"
"Or… perhaps Eld?" She says smug and I shot her a warning glare, she must remember him from the encounter in the woods.
"I think we haven't properly finished our last fight." I look over my shoulder to see Levi standing with his arms crossed. "Right, Jaclyn?"