She was sinking lower and lower below the surface, it was dark and cold. She couldn't move her hands and feet, they were tied up, she was too tired and it hurt to move anyway, she took her last breath, seeing Sophia's smiling face.
Gasping for air, Maddie sat up in bed, she looked around the room frantically. She felt two strong arms go around her waist, pulling her back down in bed, she stiffened out in a panic. "Babe, it was just a nightmare. You're okay." She laid back down, resting in his arms, trying to control her breathing. She kept having the same nightmare of drowning, every night.
She looked over, seeing that Happy was asleep, she slipped from bed, she went down the hall to the livingroom. Sitting down on the couch, dhr closed her eyes, trying to recall the missing hours from Thursday to Friday. It was still a blank, there was nothing, there, she was frustrated. It was three in the morning, she just needed to clear her mind, she pulled on her shoes and decided to go for a drive.
She backed out of the drive, she opened the sunroof on her SUV, rolling down all the windows. She drove around town, settling on a spot south of town, near a creek. She use to go there as a kid, with Opie and Jax. They'd go there anytime they needed to escape, sometimes they'd take someone special out there. She pulled over to, grabbing a blanket from the back of her SUV, she followed the path down to the flat rocks by the creek. She saw a figure sitting on the rocks, she let out a startled gasp. The figured turned around, slowly. "What are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing lass. It's three am."
"I needed to clear my head, escape from..."
"From what?" He walked closer to her.
"The nightmares, the confusion, the darkness, ..."
He took her hand, she spread the blanket out on the rock, laying down on it, staring up at the stars and the moon. "Tell me what's going on in your head?" He laid down beside her.
"I'm missing twenty-four hours of my life, if not more, I keep having a nightmare of drowning, there's something is being kept from me and I just can't put my finger on it.
"Maybe it's for your own good."
She let out a slow exhale. "I just want to know the truth, why is everyone so concerned about protecting me?" She looked over at him, he was staring at her intently. "What?"
"Don't push yourself to remember, it will come back to you love,"
Her phone started ringing, she fished it out of her pocket. "Hello?"
"Where the fuck are you?"
"I needed to clear my head. I went for a drive. I'll be back soon."
"Be careful. I love you."
"Love you too." She ended the call. Looking over at Chibs she smiled at him. "You never answered my question, what are you doing out here at three am?"
"Same as you, clearing my head."
"What's troubling you?"
"Lost love!" He said quietly. "I had the most beautiful women, then I lost her, because I was stupid."
"If you truly love her, then fight for her Chibs."
"It's too late."
She sat up, looking at him, she saw tears in his eyes. She reached over, cupping his face. "It's never too late." She smiled at him, leaning over she kissed his cheek. "I better get back before Hap sends half the club looking for me." He got up, holding his hand out to her, she took it, he pulled her up and into his arms. There was something familiar about being in his arms, she wrapped her arms around him. She pulled away, bending over she picked up the blanket and started up the embankment to her vehicle. He was behind her, his hand at the small of her back, guiding her.
"I'm going to follow you back, make sure you get home."
"I'll be fine, you don't need to."
He cupped her face, looking into her eyes. "I insist."
She climbed into her SUV, and headed home, he followed her, she couldn't shake the strange feeling she had when she touched Chibs or he touched her.
XXX
She walked into the house as the sun started to come up, Happy pulled her into his arms. "I was worried about you!"
"I'm sorry. My mind was so cluttered..."
"Next time wake me up!" She kissed him, wrapping her arms around him. She felt bad about worrying him, she should have left a note or something. He picked her up, carrying her into the bedroom. He sat her on the edge of the bed, she kicked her shoes off, throwing them towards the closet, she scooted herself back on the bed. Laying down under the blankets, he brushed back her hair from her face. "Get some rest."
She watched him leave the bedroom, she closed her eyes, trying to fall back asleep. She started thinking about Chibs and wondering about his lost loved, hoping it really wasn't to late for him. She tried to remember if she'd seen him at the club with anyone, but she couldn't remember. Why was everything blocked? She hated not being able to remember shit, it was annoying as hell.
She could feel the muscles getting tight in her neck and shoulders, causing her head to hurt. She needed to relax, she got up, going into the bathroom, she ran a hot bath, filling it with her favorite bubble bath. She undressed, and climbed into the tub, sinking onto the hot soapy water, letting the bubbles, kiss the back of her neck. She could feel the tension, starting to melt away. Her eyes were closed, she saw pictures flashing before her eyes, of her being hit across the face, and kicked in the stomach.
There was a hand on her shoulder, she sat up and screamed, blinking her eyes, Happy was starring at her. She clinched her jaw, looking at him. He grabbed her by the arms lifting her out of the water, wrapping a towel around her. "Are you okay?'
She started to shiver. "I...I.." He pulled her into his arms. "It was a horrible nightmare."
"It's okay" She pulled away from him, drying off, and getting dressed, leaving the bathroom. She crawled back into bed, curling up into a ball, trying to push back her racing thoughts. She felt him sit on the bed next to her, she rolled over to look at him. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"No, thanks. I'm still trying to sort it out, but thanks for asking." She laid back down, he looked down at her.
"I'll be going to work today, if you need anything, call me."
"I will."
"Eat today, when you feed Sophia."
"Hap..."
"You have to keep you're strength up. You have to eat, promise me!"
"Alright! I promise!" He leaned over kissing her.
"I love you. Take care of yourself today."
"I will, and I love you too."
She watched him leave, to get ready for work, she heard tiny feet coming down the hall. She smiled as the door opened, and Sophia peeked in the room. "Good morning sweet girl. Come get into bed with me!" The little girl crawled into bed, with Maddie, the snuggled together. This is what she needed right here, was this beautiful little girl.
They were laughing together in bed together, when Happy walked out of the bathroom. "Hi daddy!"
"Good morning baby girl!" She jumped up and flew at him, wrapping er arms around his neck. "You take care of mommy today?"
"Okay."
He leaned down down kissing her, on the lips, before leaving for work. She watched him leave the room, smiling at her daughter. "Ready for breakfast baby?"
"Yes mommy!"
"Let's go out to eat!" The little girl bounced off the bed, running from the bedroom, down to her own, to change clothes. She got up from the bed, going to the bathroom, she brushed her hair, did her make up. She went into the bedroom, and got dressed. She wandered down to Sophia's room to see what was taking so long. The little girl was standing in her room, dressed, turning circles dancing. Maddie stood in the doorway watching her smiling. "Are you ready to go?"
"Yes mommy! Can we take daddy something?"
"Of course!" They went the dinner on Main Street, and had breakfast.
"Mommy, can we take breakfast to all my uncles?"
"What should we take them?"
"Donuts and muffins!"
She laughed. "I think you're Uncles would love that. You can order them!" Sophia bounced up and down with excitement. "Finish your breakfast!" The waitress came to the table with the check.
The little girls eyes lit up. "I need a bunch of donuts and muffins for my dad and uncles to go please!" The waitress looked at Sophia and then at Maddie.
"I'll take a dozen glazed donuts, a dozen blueberry muffins to go please." Maddie sipped her coffee until the waitress brought their to go order, they paid their bill, and left the diner. They drove to TM, getting out of the car, Sophia was jumping up and down, because she was excited about being here.
"Daddy! Daddy!"
Happy looked up seeing Sophia and Maddie standing across the lot, he smiled and started to walk across the lot towards him. "Hey baby girl! What are you doing here?" He scooped her up in his arms, he leaned over kissing Maddie.
"Me and mommy ate breakfast! And brought you and my uncles donuts and muffins!"
"You did?" He kissed Sophia on the check.
"Can I tell them?"
"Yes, baby! Let's go tell them." He carried her towards the garage, Maddie watched as Sophia told her Uncles about the donuts and muffins. Maddie carried them to the picnic table and watched the guys coming towards her. She smiled at them, Jax kissed her on the cheek.
"How are you feeling?"
"Better. Thanks."
The rest of the men helped themselves to donuts and muffins, Sophia was in hog heaven surrounded by by her dad and uncles. Happy looked at Sophia. "What did you have for breakfast?"
"French toast, eggs, and bacon with chocolate milk!"
"What did mommy have?"
"Coffee and toast."
Maddie was talking to Opie, when she felt his gaze on her, she looked up and saw him glaring at her. She walked over to see what was wrong, his arms went around her waist. "You promised me, you were going to eat."
"I did.."
"Toast...is not a good enough breakfast." He growled at her. "If you don't start taking better care of yourself ..."
"I'm sorry, I just wasn't hungry."
He cupped her face. "Eat a muffin!"
"No, thank you!" She sat down on the bench of the picnic table. "I will take a water." He went inside the clubhouse. Chibs sat down beside her, she smiled at him. "Hi Chibs. What's up?"
"Just wanting to see how you're doing love?" She started to answer him but she flashed on the two of the kissing, she closed her eyes. Trying to get it back, what she just saw. "Maddie?"
She slowly opened her eyes, looking at him. "I'm fine." She stood up to go into the clubhouse, she was hit with a wave of dizziness, and started to fall. She heard her name being called, Chibs arms went around her, he lifted her off her feet, carrying her inside the clubhouse. He laid her on the couch, by the pool tables. "What the hell happened?" Happy asked.
"She stood up, and passed out on me!"
"She hasn't been eating enough to keep a bird alive."
Maddie slowly opened her eyes, looking at both men standing over her. "I'm fine!" She started to get up from the couch, but was pushed down by both men. "Really, I'm fine. I just got lightheaded."
"It's because you haven't been eating enough!" Happy growled at her.
She closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. I just don't have an appetite." She looked up, Chibs looked down at her, his eyes full of concern. She closed her eyes, she was in Chibs arms, they were laying in bed together. Her eyes popped open, she looked at Chibs, then at Happy. What the fuck is happening?
Happy walked into the kitchen, bringing back a sandwich. "Eat this, I'm not letting you leave until you're done."
Maddie picked up the sandwich and slowly started to eat, the clubhouse door opened, and Sophia was carried in by Tig. She smilled at the little girl, being carried towards her. "Hi sweet girl."
"Hi mommy! Are you okay?"
"Oh I'm fine sweetheart!" She finished eating her sandwich, she handed her plate to Happy. "See, all done." She started to get up from the couch, she was pushed back down by Happy and Chibs. "You two are getting on my nerves!"
"We're watching out for you babe!" She rolled her eyes.
"Bite me!" Both men laughed at her. "Can I go home now?"
"Chibs, is going to take you and Sophia home."
"What? Why?"
"I don't want you driving home, and I can't leave right now."
She rolled her eyes, and got up from the couch, Chibs picked up Sophia, his hand went to Maddie's back he guided her towards the door. She climbed into the SUV, while Chibs buckled Sophia into her carseat. He drove her home, she got out of the vehicle, opening the backdoor to get Sophia out.
"I'll get her love."
"Don't you have to get back?"
"No, I have time."
She closed the door, she watched Chibs get Sophia out of the car, she unlocked the front door, walking inside. Sophia went running off to play in her room, Maddie went to set on the couch. Chibs went into the kitchen, fixed Sophia and Maddie something to eat. He called for Sophia to come eat, she came skipping down to the kitchen, climbing into her seat.
He carried a plate of food to Maddie, sitting it on the coffee table. "Really? I just ate?"
"You need to eat."
"Ugggg! I'm not hungry, please don't force feed me!"
He sat down beside her on the couch, he touched the side of her face, she turned to face him. "You need to take care of yourself love. For that little girl in there."
"I know..." She closed her eyes, she leaned forward, kissing him on the cheek. He turned his face so her kiss landed on his lips, she didn't pull away, or stop it. She leaned further in, deepening the kiss, his hands went into her hair. She was pulled closer to him, she pulled away from him, getting up from the couch. Touching her lips, with her fingers.
"Christ Maddie...I'm sorry...I don't know what I was thinking!"
She turned. looking at him. "I...I...Filip" He pulled her into his arms, she pushed away from him, she closed her eyes. "It's okay, I mean..." He touched her face again, she slowly opened her eyes.
"I understand."