Gemma, Tara, and Lyla packed up the old place for her. She didn't want to go back, the only regret was the murals that Happy had painted for their babies. She walked through her new home, she ordered a new bed for the master bedroom, she was getting rid of the old one.

The club was moving everything over for her, they'd been great the last three days, she was cuddling James in her arms, holding him close to her. She was watching Sophia play in the backyard. She smiled as she watched her daughter dancing around.

She haf explained the whole thing about Happy yet, she just couldn't find the words, for now she just told her he was at work. She knew it was wrong, but she just couldn't break her daughter's heart.

She heard Opie calling her name, she opened the patio doors. "Back here Ope!" He walked through the house to the backyard. She smiled up at her brother, he wrapped his arm around her waist.

"How are you doing sis?"

"Coping.."

"And the kids?"

"They are doing good. I haven't told Sophia anything yet...I just can't." She looked up at him, waiting for him to give her a disapproving look. When none came she breathed a sigh of relief, looking down at her son she felt the tears fall down her face.

She heard a commotion behind her, she turned to see Tig, Jax, Chibs, Rat, and some others walking into the house. She walked into the livingroom, trying to hide the tears. "Look my favorite moving crew is here!"

Opie was standing behind her, she watched him take over and get everything moved in, the ladies of the club got there a hour later and got everything put away. She was grateful for everything, she hugged her family before they left.

Chibs held back wanting to talk to her. "How are you really doing love? Not the Bullshit you're telling everyone!"

"Filip, I'm fine." He turned her around so she had to look at him.

"I'm here if you need to talk." He kissed her forehead, before leaving the house. She locked the door behind him, turning off the lights she went to bed. Crying herself to sleep for the fourth night in a row.

XXX

Bobby and Phil rode into TM's lot early in the morning, feeling like failures. They never did find Happy, his bike was being driven down be a wrecker service. At least Maddie would have it for closure, they walked into the clubhouse finding Tig at the bar

"Any luck finding him?"

Bobby shook his head breaking down into tears. "How are we going to tell her?"

"I think she already knows."

Bobby drank a shot of whiskey before going to lay down in a dorm room. He'd leave it to Jax and Opie to tell Maddie

XXX

She sat up gasping for air, she opened a box of Hap's things finding his drawings. She found the crow tattoo he had designed for her. She was going to go get it put on her tomorrow, she knew that he was the only man she would ever love.

She looked at her phone it was three am, she turned on the TV. Laying in bed she touched the side of the bed that would be Hap's. She didn't want to believe he was gone, but she knew if he was still alive he'd be here right now or found a way to let her know.

She let the tears roll down her face, she knew she had to be strong for Sophia and James. Since she was alone in her room, she could be weak and cry for all that she had lost. She got up after ten minutes and washed her face. Going into the kitchen, she grabbed a bottle of water and something to eat. She went back to her bedroom, curled up in bed and watched TV.

She woke up four hours later when the baby started crying, she went into the nursery picking him up, talking to him. He smiled at her, cooing. She changed his diaper, then settled into the chair to feed him. He had the same coloring as his father, the same dark eyes, he had the same frown too.

Both her children were the spitting image of their father, Maddie smiled at the thought of seeing Happy in their faces. She heard little feet running down the hall, she smiled and called out to Sophia. The little girl came running into the nursery, she climbed up into the chair next to Maddie.

"Mommy, I miss daddy. When he coming home?" She exhaled slowly, closing her eyes, knowing she needed to explain that daddy wasn't coming home.

"Baby, daddy loves you with all his heart. He would do anything to protect you and keep you safe."

"I love him too mommy!"

"He came to get us from the mean man's house...but he got hurt..."

"Is he ok mommy?" Her little eyes filled up with tears.

"I don't think so baby."

"Did he go to heaven?"

"Oh baby..." The little girl ran out of the nursery, someone was ringing the doorbell, it was seven in the morning. James was crying because his feeding was being disturbed, Sophia was in her room sobbing, Maddie was trying to hold back the tears.

She got James settled back down, she went into Sophia's room to talk to her, whoever was at the door was going to fucking wait.

"Baby girl, come here." The little girl looked at her mom, she laid her head on Maddie's lap.

"So did he mommy?"

"We can hope he's okay and will come home to us soon baby but I think he'd be here by now if that was going to happen. He'd want us to be brave and carry on. It's okay to be sad and cry."

"Ok mommy!"

"Why don't we get cleaned up and we'll go get waffles." The little girl nodded her head. James was done nursing, she burped him, and carried him our of Sophia's room. Standing in the hall she ran into Jax, Opie, and Chibs, all three had tears in their eyes.

She handed Chibs the baby. "Please watch him while I shower." She walked down the hall, leaving the three men staring after her.

XXX

"Thanks for the ride!" The man climbed out of the 18 wheeler at the truck stop in Oregon. He still haf a long way to go before he got home. He walked up to the next trucker he saw.

"Where you heading?"

"Tacoma."

"Can I catch a ride?"

"Sure."

The man climbed into the cab, another step closer to the ones he loved.

XXX

She sat in the diner on Main Street, with the three bikers and her two children. She laughed at her daughter making the three tough bikers color with her. She cradled her son in her arms, the waitress came to take their order. When she didn't order breakfast, the three men frowned at her. She ignored their looks, letting the waitress leave the table.

"What's with the looks?"

"You have to eat lass..you have to keep your strength up for the little ones."

"I'm calling the waitress back over sis, so you can order!"

"We will force feed you!" Jax said smiling at her.

"Ok, I ate earlier so I'm not hungry! Don't be bullies or I'm telling Ma!" She smiled when all three men looked slightly scared of what Gemma might do to them for being mean to her. She sat back sipping her glass of water, watching Sophia continue to color.

She thought about the drawing in her purse, she needed to make an appointment to get her tattoo done later this week. She was going to see if Tara could watch the kids for her. She was lost in her own thoughts and didn't realize that Chibs was talking to her.

"Maddie, did you hear me love?"

"I'm sorry what did you ask?"

"Are you getting enough rest? You look tired." She shrugged her shoulders, looking at him.

"I have a two year old, and a one month old..." Her comment got the attention of Jax and Opie.

"Have Anita stay with you for a couple of nights to help you out sis." She wasn't about to tell him, that she had a budget to stick to. That would allow her to stay home with her children for the next six months, and still live comfortably.

"I'll be fine, I don't need anyone staying with me to help me with my children." She shut down, not wanting to talk about it. The food came, she watched them eat, she loaded Sophia and James into her SUV and took off for home.

The three men watched her leave, each worried about her.

XXX

She went to the park after breakfast, letting Sophia play and run. She knew she needed to do some sort of memorial for Happy, she was his wife, it was her responsibility. She'd call Gemma this afternoon while the kids were napping and ask her to help.

She heard the rumble of motorcycles riding up, turning around out of habit, she felt a tears falling down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them away, Bobby and Tig walked across the park towards her.

"Uncle Tiggy! Uncle Tiggy!" Sophia ran up to him, throwing herself at his legs.

"Hi Princess! What ya doing?"

"Playing." She took his finger pulling him towards the swings. Maddie smiled at the two of them, she turned around to look at Bobby approaching her.

"Bobby, how'd you find me?"

"GPS on your vehicle."

"What can I do for you?" She could" see the concern in his eyes, he walked forward wrapping his arms around her.

"I'm worried about you sweetheart. Jax, Opie, and Chibs said you are exhausted and need some rest."

"I'm fine. Just getting into the swing of being in a new home. No one needs to worry." He handed her a thick envelope full of cash. "What's this?"

"It's Hap's cut, plus extra from his brothers. We take care of our own." She shook her head, pushing it back into his hand.

"No, I can take care of my family."

"Take it Madison Claire, it's yours." She shoved the envelope in her purse.

"Thank you."

"The club will take care of the memorial, just tell us what day is good. We don't want you stressed out trying to plan it." She smiled at him.

"I will call you.." She was fighting back the tears, she was trying to be strong. She called to Sophia that it was time to go. Tig carried her over to where Bobby and Maddie were standing. They helped her get the kids in the car. She hugged both bikers before leaving the park, they watched her leave, both concerned that she wasn't doing well.

XXX

By the end of the day she was exhausted, she bathed both children and had them in bed by eight-thirty. She was asleep by nine herself, only to be up at eleven to feed James. He was back down and asleep by midnight, she went to the livingroom.

Turning the lights on low, she sat on the couch and watched TV. She heard a motorcycle ride down the street, she heard a quiet knock on the door. She looked our the peep hole, seeing it was Chibs, she slowly opened the door.

"Filip? What are you doing here?"

"I was driving by, saw the lights on and wanted to make sure everything was alright!"

"Everything is fine." He started to walk away, not wanting to be alone. "I'm about to fix something to eat, are you hungry?" He turned around, smiling at her.

"Yes, I could eat." He walked into the house following her to the kitchen. She went to the fridge pulling out left over soup, she poured it into a pan to heat up. She made them grilled cheese sandwiches, she brought the food to the table.

She picked at her food, eating enough to get the nutrition she needed to keep nursing. She leaned back in her chair, seeing Chibs look of concern. "What?"

"You barely ate lass." His hand covered hers.

"Filip, I'm fine. Everyone needs to stop worrying about me."

"Maddie, I made a promise to Hap, that if something happened to him that I'd take care of you and the little ones. If you need anything..."

"I can take care of my family..." She picked her dishes up, carrying them over to the sink.

"I'm not saying that you can't." He was standing behind her. "Just know I'm here if you need a friend."

XXX

He borrowed the truckers phone to try to call her, but it went straight to voicemal. Looking at the time he saw it was after midnight, she'd be asleep. He'd try to call again once he was in Tacoma. He had to get a hold of someone back home before it was too late.

AN: Welcome to the new followers and favorites! Please review!