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"What are you plotting, Rivaini?"

The pirate looked over at Varric from her perch on the bar stool, an innocent look on her features. "Who, me? Plotting? What ever could you mean?"

"Right," Varric said slowly. "I haven't been seeing those wicked looks you've been sending Hawke for the past few minutes."

"Varric," Isabela pouted.

"Rivaini," Varric mimicked. "Don't try to bullshit the bullshitter. Not that I'm protesting, of course. We could do with a bit less seriousness."

Isabela laughed. "Oh, Varric, I can't get anything past you, can I?"

"No, but you can always keep trying."

She leaned in close enough to not be overheard. "You've seen how she looks at that Chantry boy."

"Of course I have. She's been looking at him like she wants to eat him alive since the first moment she saw him," Varric chuckled.

"I think it's high time those two shagged like wild rabbits."

Varric sighed, taking a drink from his tankard. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Oh, come now, Varric," Isabela badgered. "All I'm trying to do is win them both a little future happiness. Is that so wrong?"

"I'm almost certain it'll end up that way," Varric muttered. Then he sighed. "Alright, Rivaini. I'll help you."

Isabela punched a fist in the air and whooped, causing Varric to chuckle and shake his head. Whatever floated her boat.

Hawke always took Sebastian with her. It was just something she always did. When asked why by Isabela, she claimed she wanted someone with a ranged weapon who wasn't an apostate.

She liked to tell herself it was because his purity was refreshing, and she liked to have a balanced party.

They were headed out to the Wounded Coast to clear out some slavers today with Sebastian, Varric, and Fenris tagging along. So as soon as Hawke turned her attention to the former slave, Varric glanced over at Sebastian, a curious smile tugging at his lips.

"So, Choir Boy," he began. "I've always wondered, what does the Maker get out of his people being celibate?"

After getting used to the dwarf's usually joking and sexual questions, this shouldn't have caught Sebastian off guard. "Uhm, It proves our devotion. It shows Him we can resist worldly temptation."

"Uh-huh..." Varric murmured. "So if the whole world became celibate, the Maker would be pleased?"

"Well, no," Sebastian admitted. "Everyone does the Maker's work in one way or another, I suppose. The brothers and sisters of the Chantry just serve the Maker above all else."

"So no wives, husbands, kids?" Varric asked.

Sebastian shook his head. "Not after we take our vows."

"Really," Varric drawled. "I would think the Maker would want those people procreating most. You people are the most patient, the most responsible. You'd be some of the best parents in my book."

Sebastian scratched the back of his neck. "Uh, perhaps..."

"I was just thinking, is all."

Sebastian's brow furrowed, and just then Hawke flashed a smile over her shoulder at the two of them, the wind whipping her brown curls around. As Varric watched, the prince smiled back, his cheeks reddening ever so slightly before he looked away.

Varric chuckled quietly to himself. Maybe Rivaini was right.