It was total disco life at Slade's house, he was partying it up with the Riddler and Two-Face and they were all pretty drunk. "Hey guys, want to see my goldfish collection?" Slade asked because they were all pretty drunk and like why not? Everyone was for it and danced over to the goldfish room where Slade had like so many goldfish.
They shook their hips while they checked out the itty bitty creatures, "ohmygod they are soooooo precious" Riddler said and Two-Face flipped a coin to make sure he agreed and he did.
"I spend the majority of my assassin monies on these lil babies" Slade knew how to handle the fish with care and pulled one out of it's enclosure. The goldfish did some cool tricks like backflips and somersaults. They all ooed and ahhed, but really just in case your stupid, fish flop around when they are dying and that's what was really happening. Slade put the fish back in the tank and it was so freakin relieved. Who knows how many fish he's killed doing that you know?
There was a knock at the door but they are villains and have henchmen for special lines of work so Slade just told one of his men to open the door and it was Batman! "omfg who invited him!" Two-Face was not in his normal attire and was kinda embarrassed to be seen out of character. "I told you I should have wore that acid-aten suit!" He cried and the three kinda cuddled for comfort.
Batman was tryin to be tough and was like I'm not here to cuddle? "You're about to be robbed, Slade!" He growled, meaning to warn the poor soul.
"Omg Batman is finally...finally becoming one of us" Riddler was so happy but then Batman was like NO so they were all like omg is he bipolar?
And then the whole wall of goldfish exploded and don't worry the innocent goldfish all somersaulted away into the water below the tower because I think Slade should live in a lighthouse so he can use the light to search for more goldfish. Jason was there but he was in his Arkham Knight gear and was using that awful computer disguise voice again. But everyone knew it was him? "Hand over the goods, Sladee!" Scarecrow and Penguin were there too, but they stayed behind Batman who stayed behind Riddler and Two-Face who stayed behind Slade.
"omg how many people got my facebook party invite on facebook?" Slade was a little freaked out lol
But Jason was here for some serious buzzwax. "Give me your sword, Slade!"He was bossy but had a pretty cool gun and everyone liked it so they chose to stay neutral...even Batman.
But Slade was very attached to his sword like no one else. When he was a boy he had pull it from a stone in the woods with the help of Merlin and it completed him it was his soulmate so he didn't want to. He had it out and was looking at it while thinking all this kind of like in anime when they think too much and Jason just grab it out of his hand "Noooooooooooo" He had never faced defeat like this but guess what, it was happening now.
Everyone was then like well shit i guess we oughtta help, but it was no use.
Scarecrow was a little shellfish and tried to take his scaregas back, only to be jabbed with it again so there he goes tripping really bad.
Riddler and Two-Face tried to stand in Jason's way but he smacked them both with Penguins umbrella and then used it to hop out the window and float down to the street below like Mary Poppins. Penguin and Batman waited below trying to use a fish net to capture him because they are by the sea duhhhh, but he used the Batmobile remote to get the batmobile to push them both into the water and hopped inside it. The little shit was a expert at getting away and there was only one person to blame for all the signs of bad parenting... Batman himself.
But there was no time to think about that, they were soon all up in the lighthouse, using the light to search Gotham city for the jerky turkey.
And no one was happy no one at all. Not even a mouse
AND THEN Bane showed up, yes he was a hell of alot late but his presence definitely lit up the party like a christmas tree had just been lit up. He walked in sporting a pink ballerina outfit and had pink flowers on his big bald head. He was so glamorous and fab that the others could not help but to get in a better mood.
Soon they were just like all arguing over him and he was just like "I WANT" and they all pause waiting for his choice in glam glam love. "ALL OF YOUUU." He was kissy kissy on Scarecrow's ugly tore up face and huggy huggy on Batman's muscular body and throbby throbby on Two-face's two fleshed body if you know what I mean and it definitely was a change in mood.
There was enough alcohol floating around for everyone not to give a fly and no one could have got away even if they wanted to because like who can stand when they are smashed drunk? So I'm sure someone got raped out of the bunch.
"Oh my goshhh" Slade was like a hopeless romantic when he was drunk and pulled out his collection of diamond rings and was passing them around. "I want to marry all of you!" He announced and it seemed like such a great idea when they were all so drunk so they all exchanged vowels.
"I'm big enough for all of you" Bane flexed and said I do
"I'm too drunk to say no!" Riddler giggled and put the ring on his pinky so he could cheat on all of them, backstabber.
Two Face had tears in his eyes because lets face it he's ugly but he was getting married "I DOOOO"
Cobblepot just kinda waved his finger around and Batman helped him put on the ring and said the I do for both of them, "You guys complete me" It was cheesey and true because what is Batman without villains?
They all huggled and went to sleeps. Will they be as loyal when they are sober?