Chapter 3

Nygma and Joker were both gone in the morning, making the entire house eerily quiet, save for Wisp and Banshee making a racket in the kitchen because they were hungry. Crane spent most of the morning reading and moving Dullahan away from his coffee mug. That is until a thud sounded at his door.

Not many people arrived at Crane's early in the day. Not that they didn't show up, but it was more often the case that they'd show up in the middle of the night, drunk or sober, and panicking because Batman was on their tail. Crane had spent his fair share of nights in holding because someone had decided to lead the Bat straight to Crane's doorstep and once had let it slip that Crane let other Rogues stay the night. He'd spent at least six with a drunk Joker sleeping on his lap until someone, usually Harley or Selina, came to post bail, and by that point Crane smelled as much like cheap booze as Joker did.

"Let me in!" Nygma's voice travelled into the room, "Please I have a psychopath following me!"

"If you're talking about Batman, forget it," Crane retorted, "I'm not spending the night in holding because of you."

"No I mean Two Face is following me!"

Crane threw open the door, yanked Nygma in, then slammed the door shut and locked it.

"Are you insane?" Crane almost yelled, "Two Face hates me, like, wants to kill me hates me. In what world would you think that leading him here was a good idea? At all?"

"I didn't know where else to go!" Nygma yelled, "I figured he wasn't gonna follow me all the way to your door!"

"Of course he will!" Crane hissed, shoving Nygma away from the door, "He doesn't give up! He's Two Face! And keep your voice down! He's not deaf!"

"Where is that circus freak?" a gravelly voice snapped just outside Crane's door. Crane turned to Nygma and clapped a hand over his mouth.

"You make a single sound I will break your neck," Crane hissed and waited for the footsteps to recede down the hall and up the stairs before pulling Nygma into the living room and shoving him onto the couch.

"I have half a mind to kill you now," Crane snapped, "save Two Face the trouble."

"You wouldn't," Nygma leaned back.

"Oh don't tempt me," Crane laughed, "you push my buttons; I push you into a vat of acid."

"You don't have a vat of acid," Nygma reasoned.

"Yes but I have a tank of fear gas in my room with a mask attached to it," Crane gestured to his room, "If I wanted to kill you, I'd have a method."

"That's concerning."

"Not really," Crane sat down next to Nygma, "you should've seen Joker's face when I told him that though."

"Well I'm not sure fear gas is a good death threat though," Nygma frowned.

"If you breathe it for too long you'll die," Crane replied, "either you'll suffer an overdose of cortisol and go into cardiac arrest, or you'll suffocate."

"I worry about your sanity," Nygma commented.

"My sanity?" Crane smirked, "What about yours?"

"Excuse you I am perfectly sane," Nygma raised his eyebrows.

"Name the last time you didn't use a riddle in a crime."

"Name the last time you didn't use fear gas."

"August 18th, I used a chemical that completely removes fear, then filled an entire building with it."

"Oh yeah, that."

"What about you? Have you ever not used a riddle?"

Nygma shifted uncomfortably, muttering riddles to himself.

"Got anything?" Crane smirked.

"No," Nygma muttered.

"I rest my case," Crane crossed his arms.

Nygma grumbled and slumped down in defeat, looking a little more like a toddler and less like a dignified mastermind. He was neither as far as Crane was concerned, but at least he usually made a concerted effort to seem like a dignified mastermind.

"If it helps at all," Crane shrugged, "being among the Rogues Gallery is a concerning notion for one's sanity as it stands."

"That doesn't help," Nygma muttered, "that means as far as you're concerned, I'm as sane as Joker."

"That is an entirely different can of worms," Crane shrugged, "that I don't even think are worms, they might be beetles."

"Was that an analogy or a joke?"

Crane paused, "Possibly both, did it help?"

"Um," Nygma slid away from Crane slightly, "it concerns me a little that you let him in here."

"He actually doesn't have a key, only three other Rogues have keys."

"Three?"

"Selina feeds my cats when I'm in Arkham, Jervis is a…friend, and Ivy doesn't irritate me nearly as much as the others so I gave her a key. I think I gave Bane a key at some point, but eh, he never uses it."

"And I didn't know about this until last night."

"Yeah well I trust those four; I don't trust you."

"You trust a kleptomaniac and a misandrist?"

"They know better, unlike a certain clown who got shoved out the window last month."

"I don't wanna know."

"Joker and I have a lot of stories you just don't wanna know."

"Well," Nygma got to his feet, "think Two Face is out of the building?"

"Hang on," Crane glanced out the nearest window and noticed a man, who was obviously Two Face, get in a car and leave, "You're good, he probably figured it wasn't worth the time and effort. He'll never stop trying to kill you though, avoid dark alleys on off days."

"Thanks for the advice," Nygma walked out the door.

"Oh yeah," Crane added, "Get me to trust you and you've got a permanent place to crash."

"I'll keep that in mind," Nygma nodded, and shut the door.

Two updates in one day? I truly must be spoiling you.

For the record, no, I'm not a huge fan of Two-Face, I like him well enough though so he will show up.

See you next chapter, I don't have much to say.