New Meanings To Old Words: Love
Well folks, I did warn you of the CLUSTERFUCK, didn't I? And as I said at the end, we've got a bit of Daryl and his Itty-Bit, Callie/Miles as they have their little chat, a bit of Glenn/Maggie on their fun-run for Lori. Should be fun, hmmm…. I suppose this could be considered the filler of the CLUSTERFUCK, if you felt like labeling it as such.
As always read, review and most of all enjoy!
~michelle
Disclaimer: I own nothing, except Callie and the crew of misfits (Danny, Miles, Jenna, Mike, Nina, Ben and Gracie).
Cough Syrup
Daryl shifted his way around the foot of the bed and plucked up the last of his discarded clothing and worked his way to where his bags were settled up on the bed. His eyes shifted towards the door and he grimaced as he shoved his hands into the open bag before him. Callie had left, and ridiculously his body hadn't been able to settle back into slumber like he'd hoped. Instead he'd been left to try and settle nerves that were unreasonably frazzled.
He'd laid there, one hand propped behind his head and the other workin' those damn dog tags of her brother's round his fuckin' neck for that whole hour. His mind circlin' around the words she'd said as she left.
"I promise, Daryl. No more stupid moves."
"Fuckin' load of shit," Daryl grumbled as he lifted a 'fresh' shirt out of his bag. Lifting the worn out blue flannel button up to his nose he snarled and shrugged figurin' it was as good as it was gonna fuckin' get at this point. Wincing he shifted the shirt around his body and onto his shoulders, his eyes skipped to the door again as he began to button.
The woman was probably still shufflin' about somewhere, and he knew she'd pitch a fit about him restin' up more if he moved his shit back out to their tent while she was still around. Fuckin' hypocrite. No more stupid moves his ass. If she was done makin' stupid moves her ass woulda stayed in bed with him and rested too. Growlin' low in his throat he buttoned his shirt about halfway up and then gave up, his eyes roamin' around the room lookin' for his fucked up, horribly laced boots.
His eyes skipped around the room three times before he realized that the fuckin' things weren't there.
"Son of a bitch. Gonna kill that woman," Daryl growled as he worked his way towards the door. He regretted throwin' it open as harshly as he did the moment it banged back off of the wall behind him. Shakin' his head he ran a tired hand through his dirty, disheveled, fuckin' grown-out hair and scratched at the odd sensation of the hairs tickling the back of his neck.
He'd never been one for longer hair, more 'cause of Merle than personal choice. He could have gave two rat's asses 'bout what his fuckin' hair looked like on any given day. Merle's militant side had always pushed through at the point of it reachin' past his ears and had the man shovin' Daryl down every fuckin' month into a chair so he could hack away at it.
'No brother of mine's gonna be runnin' 'round like some pussy with fuckin' Fabio hair.' The words had always cracked Daryl up, earnin' him a whack to the head and a few askew clumps of hair for good measure. Rubbing at the back of his head where he could still feel the slight difference in lengths, that were probably less noticeable now than before, he couldn't help but crack a smile.
Daryl walked his way out into the house proper and then stopped, suddenly feelin' a bit out of place and oddly self-conscious. Shifting his eyes over the dust covered family photos in the living room he shifted on his sock clad feet at the sound of a small giggle.
A little-bitty baby giggle that he recognized from months ago. One that he felt like he hadn't heard in a lifetime.
Narrowing his brow he let his hand fall from the back of his head and winced a bit as he shifted towards that sound. That tiny little sound that lit up a strange sort of sensation in Daryl's chest and had his breath catching when he stopped in the doorway.
Gracie was sitting on the floor with Maggie. One of his boots was set off to the side, while Maggie was workin' slowly to lace up the one settled between her thighs. Daryl shifted a bit so that he could watch them without alertin' them and let his eyes roam over Gracie's face as the girl smiled and sat forward.
"Okay," Maggie said holding the lace up for Gracie, a smile on both of their faces. "Ya see this, Gracie? Now, watch 'cause you're gonna do yours next." Maggie lowered the lace and Gracie leaned forward a bit more and watched Maggie do up the laces.
Daryl watched for a few seconds more as Maggie finished lacin' up his boots. She smiled widely as Gracie took the boot from her and held it up close to her face for inspection. Maggie's head was still shaking and a single brow lifted as she shoved a tiny pair of boots towards the little girl.
"C'mon, you show me," Maggie said shifting so that she was settled on her hip as Gracie spread her legs wide and began lacin' up the boots. Daryl shifted into the room slowly, angling around to lean on the piano that was settled near the window and put a hip to the piano so that he could watch the little girl lace up her boots.
Maggie's eyes lifted to him, a haughty tilt to one brow that he couldn't help but return. Without him havin' to ask, Maggie quietly returned her gaze to Gracie and left him to watch unbeknownst to the little girl concentrating on her task. Maggie's hands went out to help the girl but were smacked away as Gracie's little mouth twitched to the side. The younger woman slipped an amused look up to him and he shrugged in his spot. After a few minutes Gracie got both boots laced up and slipped on to her feet.
Maggie then shifted to her knees so that she could help the girl tie them up and Daryl was suddenly struck with the image of Amy doin' the same thing. The image young woman's blonde head and wide smile shinin' in the sun at the Quarry as she taught Gracie how to tie up the pair of boots that Callie had found on the road for her. The boots that were too big for the little girl's feet but better protection than the tiny tennis shoes she'd been wearing.
Boots that looked nothin' like the one's currently settled on the girl's feet. No, the ones on her feet looked to be older, more worn in, but a much better fit on her. Daryl's brow twitched as he shifted along the piano and stepped a bit closer to watch Gracie wiggle her newly booted feet.
"Was wonderin' who stole my boots," Daryl grumbled as he crossed his arms over his chest. Gracie's head popped up from lookin' at her feet at that point and she beamed-she fuckin' beamed-at him before scrambling to her feet. She ducked around the still sitting Maggie and snatched up his boots then ran towards him.
Daryl let his arms fall and his hands reach out for his the girl, and his boots. Gracie surprised him by tossin' his boots to the floor and grabbin' his hand tuggin' him towards the little bench seat at the piano. She tugged at him and pushed at him until he looked up in utter confusion at the now standing and fuckin' chucklin' Maggie.
"I'm no expert in readin' silent children's signals," Maggie said crossing her arms over her chest. "But I'm guessin' she wants to help you to sit so she can help you put your boots on there, Cletus."
"I can put my own damn boots on," Daryl growled at Maggie and then glared down at the little girl. Gracie settled her hands onto her hips and pointed a finger to the bench, causing Maggie to chuckle a bit louder. "Laugh it up, Calamity Jane. Laugh it up."
"According to Danny, Callie told her to help you while she was gone," Maggie said causing Daryl to look up at her as he settled himself gingerly onto the bench. "Said to make sure she kept an eye on you and that you took it easy."
"Fuckin'-" Daryl glared down at Gracie as she tried to work his boot on. "Gimme that," Daryl said snatchin' the boot out of the girl's hands. Shifting his head on his shoulders and rollin' his eyes at the pout that settled on the girl's face as she huffed at him he sighed and put on both boots. "You tie 'em."
Daryl watched Gracie immediately plop to the ground at his feet and dive her hands towards the laces grinnin' like a fool. His eyes shifted up to Maggie who settled herself near them and watched Gracie work with a smile of her own. Shifting his mouth around a bit Daryl scratched at his chest where the dog tags were hanging and let his eyes roam around a bit before settling on Maggie's raised brow.
"She still here?" Daryl asked grunting a bit when he felt Gracie tug hard on the laces to make them tighter.
"She was in with dad," Maggie said quietly, her eyes shifting to the doorway for a moment before settling back on him. Some kind of darkness rolled over her expression in that moment and Daryl's eyes shifted uncomfortably away from the young woman and down to Gracie's head. "But I think she went out to see Rick," Maggie's eyes shifted to the ground for a minute watching Gracie and then she looked back up to him catching his eyes. "I think they're still out there. Did you need me to -"
"She take them antibiotics last night?" Daryl said cutting her off. He watched her eyes widen for a moment with the quickness of his question and then she opened her mouth, her head already makin' that shakin' movement that he'd been expecting her to. He sighed and raked his hand through his hair as he listened to her.
"She said she didn't need them," Maggie said quietly, her arms tightening a bit around her chest as she looked at him. "Said she was feelin' better and that we should save 'em for you and Carl, since you two were still on the mend." Maggie's head shook a bit more and she shifted on her feet jutting out a hip as she lifted a brow. "I'm guessin' she lied." Daryl rolled his eyes at her and Maggie shook her head more. "Y'all are the worst patients in the world. Good Lord, a twelve-year-old listens better than two people that should know better when it comes to infections. There ain't a hospital that's gonna be able to help—"
"I know that," Daryl practically seethed his hands raking through his hair as he shifted his slightly grimacing face down to Gracie's up turned face. He reached down, wincing slightly and lifted the girl up and onto his lap. "Sorry," he muttered to the little girl as he shifted his feet around a bit. "Good job, Itty-bit. Got 'em good an' tight." Daryl looked up at Maggie and raised a brow.
"Been tyin' up my daddy's boots since I was 'bout her age," Maggie said smiling at Gracie slightly as she yet again answered his unasked question. "He always said you gotta be able to tie boots up right to survive on this farm. Figure it couldn't hurt to pass the knowledge down."
Daryl nodded and put his hand to Gracie's head and ruffled her hair earning another smile from the girl. Maggie huffed out a sigh and he ignored her as he shifted and looked at Gracie's boots as she held her legs out for inspection. "Got you some nice boots now, huh?" Daryl's eyes lifted to Maggie who smiled tightly back.
"Mom kept everything," Maggie said with a bit of a sad smile her eyes tilting to the ground for a moment before skipping back up to him. "Callie had mentioned that Ben and Gracie didn't really have much in the way of winter clothes. I went up to see what we had in the attic that might fit 'em," Maggie looked at the little girl swinging her feet as she sat on Daryl's lap. "Boots she had were way too big for her. She woulda got hurt runnin' 'round in them eventually."
Daryl nodded and shifted the girl off of his lap and onto the floor. Gracie stood there in her little sundress that had seen better days, and a pair of jeans that were ripped in each knee. Along her shoulders she had a hooded sweatshirt that he figured must have been part of the stuff that Maggie had given her. It hung a bit big on her tiny body but provided more warmth than anything else they'd been able to find for her. Putting his hands on his knees he caught Gracie's gaze with his.
"You say thank you?" Daryl asked quietly and Gracie sucked her bottom lip and averted her eyes. Daryl sighed and pushed her towards Maggie. "Go on," Daryl shoved the little pouting girl towards the wide eyed Maggie and crossed his arms over his chest. Gracie shifted her eyes back to him and he lifted a brow. "Ain't gonna ask you to do it again," Daryl said gruffly.
Gracie slipped forward and tugged on Maggie's hands dragging the younger woman down so that she could put her cupped hand to Maggie's ear. Daryl craned his neck just a bit to listen but wasn't able to make out a single word. He figured by the way Maggie smiled down at Gracie when she leaned back on her heels that it was said.
"You're very welcome, Gracie." Maggie said slipping her eyes from the girl to Daryl.
"Go get Miles for me," Daryl said to Gracie who stared at him for a minute. "Go on," Daryl waved his hand and shifted on his seat a bit. "'Fore they leave." Gracie dashed out of the room and left Maggie to stare at the doorway, while Daryl was left to stare at Maggie.
"Why doesn't she talk?" Maggie said as her arms lifted to wrap around her midsection. Daryl bit on the inside of his cheek and watched Maggie's eyes slide back to him as she waited for him to answer.
"Last person she was with that spoke loud got torn into by a Walker right in front of her," Daryl said watching Maggie's eyes widen in shock. "Guess she figures it's safer to be quiet all the time than risk it." He held Maggie's gaze for a moment before sighing. "We're workin' on it." Rakin' his hand through his hair he watched Maggie hug herself a bit tighter and scratched again at the back of his head. "Get those meds Callie didn't take and bring 'em back to me," Daryl said earning a shocked look from Maggie. "She was burnin' up this mornin'," Daryl said quietly and then waved his hand at her shooing her. "Go on."
"You're a rude son of a bitch, ain't ya?" Maggie turned from him in a huff and Daryl smirked at her when she turned back to him. Maggie tilted her head to the side and again lifted a brow before smirking at him. "I'll just bring back that dose you refused last night too, then. Hmmm?"
"Fuck you, Calamity Jane." Daryl said lifting a stiff middle finger at the now chuckling girl at the doorway. His hand lowered tiredly as he shifted his eyes to watch Gracie's sun-kissed brown curls dart across the lawn. Shifting his eyes to his own feet he rolled his ankles around and sighed. "Thanks," he muttered to his feet and listened intently to the room before lifting his eyes back to her.
"Anytime, Cletus," Maggie said in return a tiny smile on her lips. "Anytime."
Callie slid her hand over the map spread out on the dirt before her and tapped her finger along the line of hand marked spots that showed the spread of hunting cabins. Catching her finger into the small tear a bit further off she cracked a small grin at the memory of the slightly aggravated Glenn explaining how Daryl had taken his frustrations out on his map.
Shifting on the ground she lifted her hand to rub at the bridge of her nose and rolled her head along her sore shoulders. They'd been out here for a few hours now, just her and Miles. They were close to the flat lands that they'd traveled to get Jenna's body and nearing a cluster of hunting cabins. If what Glenn and Daryl had said about the other house was true, it wouldn't be too farfetched for Sophia to have sought out refuge in a similar house.
With the close proximity of the cabins to the ravine area where Daryl had stumbled upon Sophia's doll, Callie was clinging to the hope that maybe, just maybe, they'd actually find the girl today. Clinging with hands so sore from grasping at thin tendrils of hope that she actually felt like her palms were bleeding as she wrung them absently on her lap before returning to rub idly at the bridge of her nose.
She'd long given up on getting rid of the migraine pounding behind her eyes, but that didn't stop her from trying to rub some semblance of peace into her mind. Her eyes opened again and she let her eyes travel the roadway that Miles had pointed out. The one that led right to that FEMA station.
A shadow fell over the map and Callie lifted the hand settled at her forehead to shield her eyes from the sun as she looked up. Miles' was nothing but a dark splotch against the sun-filled sky and she blinked a few times until her eyes adjusted to the light.
"Here," Miles reached out his hand and Callie raised a brow at the two pills settled in his palm. She shifted her eyes up to him and watched him roll his head along his shoulders before shifting down to a crouched position in front of her.
"What's that?" Callie shifted a bit and watched Miles reach back and grab the canteen at his hip.
"The antibiotics you apparently lied 'bout not needin'," Miles said raising his split and stitched right brow as he shook his hand at her. "Take 'em, Cal." Callie reached out and snatched the pills and then the offered canteen with a roll of her eyes.
"And where did you get those?" Callie asked after swallowing. She wiped the back of her hand over her mouth and then took another long drag off the canteen. The water felt so good going down that she almost went back for another pull before remembering that they needed to ration.
"Daryl," Miles said pushing the canteen back at her when she offered it back. "Drink it all, I got extras in the bag."
"Do I even want to know what he said to you when he handed them over to you?" Callie asked spying at the boy as he got to his feet and brushed his hands on the back of his legs. Miles smirked down at her and adjusted his ball cap.
"Not too much," Miles said that suspicious smirk of his growing a bit more. "Especially with Maggie force-feeding him his own missed drugs. You two are both apparently idiots." He smiled a bit wider and rolled his eyes in an exaggerated manner. "Will wonders never cease."
"Shut it," Callie said rubbing at her still pounding temples with her thumb while putting the canteen to her lips again. She remained in her spot on the ground watching the now chuckling boy scour the area around them, his bat settled on his shoulder and gun placed at the small of his back. Callie tilted her head a bit, cracking her neck and giving just that little bit of needed relief to her tense body. Her eyes skipped back to where Miles' gun sat and her mind instantly went back to their time at the gun training his morning. "You wanna tell me what's going on between you and Beth?"
Miles stopped his pacing immediately, his head snapping to where Callie sat. His mouth had dropped open just a bit in shock and honestly the sight had her smiling just a bit more. As soon as he caught wind of that smile though his jaw was closed tight and he was turning away.
"Nothin'," Miles said quickly, succinctly, as his eyes continued to roam the area around them. Callie snorted and looked back down at the map, which of course had Miles looking back at her. "I helped her with her gun when it got jammed; showed her how to fix it. That's why we were up there right? Doesn't mean anythin's goin' on." Callie lifted a brow at him and he shuffled his feet as he continued to pace. She didn't say another word just lowered her gaze back down to the map and worked out the distance they had to travel. She heard Miles let off a sigh and raised her gaze back to him in time to see him shake his head. "I was mean to her," Miles said softly his eyes slipping over his shoulder briefly and then back to his wrapped up, still healing hand. "I wanted to fix it."
"Did you?" Callie asked quietly and again the boy let out a long sigh while he scratched his hand at the back of his head.
"Not if the way she was glarin' at me says anything," Miles said with a bit of a chuckle as he looked back to Callie.
"Guess you'll have to keep tryin'," Callie said looking back down at her map a tiny vestige of a smile working her lips. "Figure guns ain't really the way to that girl's good-side, buddy."
"No kiddin'," Miles said laughing as he walked back towards her. "God did you see the way she was holdin' it," he shook his head and Callie looked up with a smile. "Don't know why she and Patricia were so interested. They were both scared to death. I mean fuck, even Carol had a better grip on guns than either of them and they live here."
Miles spread his arms out, his bat going wide out to the side as he indicated the lush field and forest area around them. Callie nodded her head and watched as Miles resituated his bat on his shoulder, she felt his eyes on her head as she dipped her attention back down to the map. Felt his footsteps as they thudded on the ground below her. Felt the slight chill of his shadow as he again blocked out the sun and crouched down before her.
"They're scared aren't they?" Miles asked, causing Callie's eyes to slip up to him. His eyes were boring holes into her now as he searched for an answer to the question he hadn't asked yet. The question that was sitting on the tip of his tongue. "Not of the Walkers, not of the world we live in, but of us. They're scared of us. Aren't they?"
"I'd say some of us," Callie said putting her hands on to her knees and watching Miles recoil slightly. His bandaged left hand lifted and ran under his mouth and she sipped at the water in the canteen by her feet.
"One of us," Miles muttered as the back of his hand passed a second time under his mouth. His eyes met hers and his teeth began nibbling at his thumb, and she had to work hard not to smile as she sat forward a bit.
"We gonna do this now?" Callie asked lifting a hand to him. Miles just stared at her his teeth still working a bit of skin around his thumbnail and she waved her fingers. "C'mon Miles, I got all day. And we aren't fuckin' moving until you spit it out."
"You know," Miles said on a harsh breath as he pushed back and stood up. He pointed down at her and she stared up at him watching him as he bounced on his feet. "I know you know. You have to know. The way you were with Shane in the kitchen," Miles said wagging his finger at her.
"I don't know anything, Miles." Callie said with a bit of an edge in her voice. "All I can say is that I've inferred a great deal. And honestly, I'd like to have some things confirmed before I end up takin' a step over a line that I can't step back over."
"Like Shane did," Miles said in a whisper of a voice that almost didn't reach Callie's ears. Miles shifted his head and removed his hand as he raked a hand through his matted down hair. Scratching at his head he shifted his eyes over to Callie and then back to the ground.
"Miles," Callie said watching the boy begin to pace in front of her.
"You remember out in the woods," Miles began slowly his agitated steps slowing as he continued to pace in a tight circle before her. "Before we found Jenna. Before Carl was shot," Miles said slipping his eyes over his shoulder to her. "We were talkin' about Shane, 'bout where his mind was….where it is." Miles shifted and faced Callie and she tilted her head waiting for him to finish that last deep breath he needed to take. "He killed Otis, Callie. He killed him."
Callie's chin dipped to her chest and she let out a ragged breath as she worked her own injured left hand through her hair. Her fingers caught in the tangle of knots and she pulled a bit more forcefully than she probably should have. Shifting so that her hand was cupped over her mouth she stared up at Miles watching him watch her.
She knew. Of course she knew. She wasn't an idiot, any one could see that something was bothering Miles about what happened there. Anyone could see that the boy was having trouble swallowing what Shane was putting down. No one had even heard Miles' version of the incident and Shane had been vague and evasive.
Both looking guilty as hell. Shane for his lies. And Miles because the kid couldn't bring himself to lie to the family of the man that Shane had sacrificed for some supposed greater good. She knew. Of course she knew. But that didn't make hearing it any easier.
Because hearing gave a bit more of a realistic edge to every idle bit of worry she'd had in the back of her mind since that day on the highway, when Rick chose Daryl over Shane. That moment, that simple moment, had seemingly had more repercussions than any of them could have imagined.
"You knew," Miles said almost accusingly as he continued to stare at her. "You knew." He advanced on her now, anger written over his features. "Why the hell did you make me say it if you already fuckin' knew?"
"Because you needed to," Callie said shaking her head. "And I told you I didn't know, I-"
"That's bullshit," Miles snapped as he shook his own head and turned his back throwing his hands in the air in frustration. "Just like Daryl." Miles clenched his hands into fists at his sides and let out a long sigh, his head still shaking.
Callie watched him for a few moments more and then started folding up Glenn's map. Settling it back inside her open pack she drained the rest of the canteen Miles had given her and closed her eyes against the pulsing of her migraine. Callie let the empty canteen fall into her pack and put her hands to her hips as she watched Miles swat at the knee-high grass with his bat.
"You feel better?" Callie asked earning nothing but a gruff grunt from the boy as he swatted more fervently at the grass. His eyes slipped to her over his shoulder and he shook his head.
"Should I?"
"You're a good kid," Callie said then smiled when he tipped his head up at her. "A good man," she amended with a lifted hand. "I don't really think that anything is ever going to make you feel better about what you witnessed out there."
"Great," Miles said the sarcasm dripping from the word and down into the green grass he was swatting at. "So what do we do now?" Miles asked shifting and looking at her, his bat hanging at his side. "Do we tell Rick?" He watched her shift on her feet a bit, her brows lifting just a bit. "We need to tell Rick, Cal."
"Do you honestly think that Daryl and I are the only ones who figured this out," Callie said slipping forward a bit her fingers ghosting over the taller grass in front of her. Miles stared at her and she lifted her palm to the sky. "Really Miles, I don't have mystic abilities. I just know how to pay attention, just like a whole bunch of others. The only difference is I know you."
"Just like Rick knows Shane," Miles said quietly watching as Callie nodded and shifted to get her pack from the small patch of dirt she'd been settled upon under a large semi-shady tree. "Or thought he knew him. Shouldn't we still-"
"Do you think it matters?" Callie asked cutting him off and staring at him as she shouldered her pack. His eyes were wide as he stared at her and she grimaced slightly as she adjusted her pack on her shoulders. "Do you think what he did matters?"
"I don't-"
"I've killed people Miles," Callie said quietly holding his gaze. Miles shifted a bit to face her and clenched his hands tight on his bat. "I killed those two kids in my bar. I killed another at a farm not far outside of Georgetown," she shifted on her feet her eyes angled down at her boots for a second before looking back up to him. "I killed Santos at the CDC." Callie watched Miles swallow hard and his hand clench tighter onto his bat. "I killed him. Fed him to a Walker. Let it bite into him and made him fight for his survival and then I put a bullet into his head." She stepped closer to where the knee-high grass started and stared at him. "Carl and Ben watched me do it."
"Jesus," Miles ran the back of his free hand over his mouth and shook his head at the ground. Callie closed her eyes as the pounding in her head came back full force and she blinked away a few of the tears that were threatening behind her eyes.
"I've killed more people in this than anyone else in our group. Including Shane," Callie said firmly causing Miles' eyes to fly back to her. "Not Walkers, Miles. People," Callie said shifting on her feet, she put her hands into her back pockets and rocked back on her heels as she watched Miles digest her words. "So I'm askin'. Does it matter?"
"Yeah," Miles said almost immediately catching Callie a bit off guard and causing her to stop rocking on her heels. She stared at the boy-become-man as he turned to face her with steely eyes. "Yeah it does." Miles stepped towards her and pointed his bat right at her chest. "I've seen your list," Miles said the bat shaking a bit with his words. "Shane doesn't have one of those. There's no remorse in him, not one bit. All that's there is this -" Miles shook his head and let his bat fall. "I don't know what it is. But it freaks me the fuck out."
A beat of silence slid between them and Callie stared at Miles as he visibly shivered at the thought of Shane's slowly deteriorating mental state. Callie once again cupped her hand over her mouth and let out a long sigh between her fingers. Nodding her head she let her hand drop down to where her gun was settled at the front of her jeans.
"Then I'll talk to Rick," Callie said firmly, watching with a bit of a smile as Miles turned his attention back to her. "I'll talk to him and we'll go from there."
Miles swung his bat at the grass as he made his way towards her and Callie again lifted her hand to shield her tired eyes from the overhead sun. He stopped right next to her, a single finger reaching out and poking her in her arm causing her to look back over her shoulder at him. His eyes were fixed on something in the grass and she shifted her hand to the knife at her thigh.
They waited, as the hunched and deteriorating form of the Walker slowly ambled its way through the knee-high grass towards them. Waited as it stared at them from a seemingly too close distance and watched it come for them. Watched and waited because who knew what else lurked in that tall grass. Callie felt Miles shake himself lightly as he no doubt thought back to his stupidity at walking through that potential hazard, wondering at what else could be hiding in there.
"Latet anguis in herba," Miles said softly causing Callie's eyes to slip from the Walker who was about to break through the grass and onto their small dirt covered clearing. Her gaze held on to Miles as he shook his head and advanced on the Walker. His hands were gripped tight to his bat and he took in a deep breath before winding up and connecting soundly with the head of the Walker.
Gore splattered over the tall yellowed grass behind the Walker, and the dead man fell to a final rest. Miles stared down at the Walker and lifted his foot high before crashing it down onto the face of the Walker. He shook his foot and looked back to Callie with a horridly tortured look on his face.
"A snake lurks in the grass," Miles said quietly swinging his bat over his shoulder again as he made his way back towards her. "Virgil." He smirked and adjusted Jim's hat on his head as she smiled at him. "Mom was a Lit Professor." His eyes skipped back to the large grassy field that spread out before them over the path that they were about to take to head towards the hunting cabins marked on the map.
"There's a way around," Callie said quietly drawing Miles' eyes back to her. He stared at her and she smiled slightly her hand reaching out to him and dragging him a bit away from the grass. "There's a way around."
"Maybe now," Miles said his eyes still roaming the area, while hers stayed locked on his face. The kid seemed to have aged a decade in the past few days and it was unsettling to see just how fast the children of this world grew and adapted. "But the grass isn't going to stop growing, Cal." He shook his head and looked back at her. "This world is perfect for snakes."
Callie nodded her head and wrapped her hand around his arm pulling him further away from that swaying, gore stained grass. Pulling him as far away from the unknown dangers hidden in that field as she could. Fooling herself into believing that her actions could protect him from the snakes that lurked in there any more than they could save him from the ones that lurked in the world that grew untended around them. Miles dipped down and snatched up his bag, tossing it over his shoulder.
"C'mon," Callie said waving a hand as Miles fell into step with her. They worked their way cautiously towards grass that was slightly lower. "There's always more than one path to take, Miles. It's the people that remember that and strive to find those other ways that are gonna survive against all those fucking snakes." His eyes skipped to her and she held his gaze and squeezed his arm. "And if it's the last thing I do in this life, I'm gonna make sure you figure out how to find those other ways."
"I can't say," Glenn said tiredly and Maggie's brow shot up in utter disbelief.
Was this man really pulling that sort of bullshit with her right now? Pulling out his loyalty to his friends and shoving it in her face after she'd spent the better portion of last night and earlier this morning begging him to keep what he saw in that barn a secret. Begging him to not say anything to his friends.
She'd lowered herself to begging this man that she'd felt a connection with, because in her mind the second he told them was the second she lost him.
She'd lowered herself and had actually believed that he would keep that secret. The look in his eyes when he tried to tell her of the dangers and the horror of what was in that barn; the look of worry that he held not only for his people but for her and her family. It struck her hard, and she'd walked away from him thinking he would keep it to himself. Thinking that maybe that look of worry would edge in and he would realize that his telling his friends would end whatever they had growing between them before it could even really begin.
And then her father had cornered her in the kitchen and told her that she shouldn't get to close to any of them, because they were leaving. As soon as Carl and Daryl were up on their feet. Whether they found that little girl or not. They were leaving. And when she'd asked why, her mind instantly went to the conversation she'd listened to between him and Callie. But when he told her about Dale and Danny in the stables with him she knew that Glenn had betrayed that bit of trust she'd put in him.
Tossed out that trust that she'd put in him when she had given herself to him and foolishly thought that it meant just as much to him as it had to her. Tossed it out and stomped on it now as he blatantly shoved the fact that he would keep his group's secrets before hers without any hesitation.
Maggie's head began to shake and she crossed her arms over her chest, wondering why she'd even thought talkin' to him alone on this trip would help anything. Wondering what she'd hoped to accomplish when obviously she'd read everything wrong and he was just like every other boy she'd ever met. Once they got a piece of the pie they didn't mind leavin' the dirty dishes for someone else to clean up.
Her mouth opened and she was about to say something-Good Lord above she didn't have a clue what that something was but she knew she couldn't just stand there with her mouth hanging open like a fish out of water- when his hand lifted a torn piece of paper. His eyes caught hers and she read the tired expression on his face as clear as day.
"Help me look," Glenn said on a sigh of such defeat and frustration that she'd actually started to feel bad again. How the hell did he do that? How did he make her feel bad when she was damn sure that he was the one that should have felt bad?
Then again, maybe they both should have been feelin' like heels for the way they'd treated each other. Both askin' the other to go against family and friends. Maggie sighed and snatched the paper from his hands and read the words.
She slipped her eyes up to him, watching a bit of confusion mar his features and she realized he didn't have a clue what he was looking for. She read the page again, the shaky hand writing blinking at her as bright as a neon light on a dark night. She read it a third time and felt her head shaking.
"You have got to be kiddin' me," Maggie said crumbling the paper in her hands and turning her back on Glenn's slightly shocked expression. She stopped and looked back at him as she stepped up behind the pharmacy counter. His eyes searched hers as he slowly made his way towards her and she shook her head. "And you called my family irresponsible and foolish."
"What?" Glenn asked and she turned her back on him as she made her way towards the rows of pharmaceuticals. She heard him toss his bag to the ground and let out a sigh as she worked her way slowly down the rows of pill bottles.
She ignored the sounds of his tiny little temper tantrum and decided to dwell in her own. She would not let her conscience drive her anger away. Not yet. Not when it felt so good to let it burn for a little while. Her foot hit off of something and her gaze lowered to see a blue hand basket, bending to pick it up she let out a sigh and shook her head.
The quick fire burn of her temper was already fading as her mind raced with other thoughts. Thoughts of little Ben and Gracie who were so ill-equipped to handle the world that her father was going to be tossin' them back into. Sure she'd found some boots and a few bits of clothing for them, but this destroyed world wasn't a place for kids to grow. Good Lord, she'd seen what they'd all been living on before comin' to the farm.
And with a baby on the way for one of them- if she didn't find these pills, God even if she did, there was no guarantee they would work- that would put them in more danger out on the road. How were they gonna feed and clothe that baby when they couldn't even find enough food for themselves?
The world beyond the farm was dangerous, she knew that. The sick and infected people that flooded the streets now wouldn't be kind to the group, she knew that. Glenn's words from earlier hadn't fallen on deaf ears. She wasn't an idiot. She knew there was a reason why they kept Mom, Shawn and the others locked in the barn.
She knew, and yet she didn't.
They're dangerous. She ain't sick. She's dyin'.
Glenn's words. Miles' words. They echoed in her head as she rummaged through pill bottle after pill bottle.
That is your mother. That is your brother. They're sick.
Her father's words, said so imploringly and so frequently that they'd dug out a little home inside her brain. Words that were said not to take away her fear or dull Beth's cryin', but said to justify and pacify his own mind as he locked them inside those wooden walls.
Her father wasn't fool enough to think that they weren't dangerous. He just wasn't strong enough to realize that they just might actually be gone for good.
Maggie felt the sting of tears settle in her eyes and shook her head as she continued down the row of shelves. Her mind was so intent on the barn back at the farm and the woman that she'd tried more than once to get the attention of after she'd been placed in that barn. Her memory so intent on that moment when she'd walked up to the door and let it slip open just enough that her step-mother could reach a hand out towards her as she spoke that the putrid smell settled into her sensory memory flashed to life.
The smell of decay and other horrid things flared in her nostrils and her hands stilled on the top of a bottle on the shelf. A tear slid down her cheek just as her ears pricked, her memory doing its job and bringing more of that horror back to the forefront of her brain.
The moans and groans so loud and so real. The smell so strong and heavy.
A gray, gore-covered hand rushed at her between the shelf and cold fingers clamped hard around her arm.
Maggie screamed.
She heard herself do it, and in the rush of blood that had pounded through her brain in that split second she heard Glenn call her name. Her free hand pushed against the hand holding her, clawing desperately and so efficiently that she broke a finger off in her free hand. She screamed again at the sight of the severed finger in her hands and tossed it aside as she felt the shelves threaten to tip from the weight of the attacker on the other side. Her focus sharpened on the figure grabbing at her. His mouth, with teeth that seemed so much larger and more dangerous due to the lack of lips and skin that should have been around them. The putrid smell of the man's breath fanned over her face as he pulled her closer to him, the shelves and her own powerful pulls of her arm the only thing keeping her from those horrid teeth.
She shifted down the shelf and she did the only thing she thought left. She yelled at him.
"No!" Maggie said to the man, her voice loud and firm as if that would help. As if she could get through to him the way people tried to get through to a wild animal. "No. Please! Let go!" She yanked on her arm and felt her body swaying down to the edge of the shelf. "Please. No!"
The man's other hand shot out and grabbed hold of her shoulder and she pulled back as he lunged towards her. Her words, her begging and pleading, falling on deaf-dead-ears.
In the next moment the man's head was snapping to the side, his painful and powerful hold on her going slack as his body fell to the ground. Every breath she dragged into her chest was painful as she stared at the body of that man; the man with his head tilted and broken half off of his body. The man that was still twitching despite the state of his gutted, torn and decaying body.
Glenn's hands wrapped around her upper arms and he turned his back on the man on the floor. His hands slid up to her neck and his face slid into her field of vision. Tears were falling freely down her cheeks now, and she couldn't stop them no matter how hard she tried.
"Did it get you? Did it bite you?" Glenn's anxious voice echoed in her ears and she felt herself shaking her head. "Are you alright? Did it get you?" She shook her head again, unable to form words. Glenn pulled her into his arms and hugged her, one of his hands threading through her hair and holding her head to him as he squeezed her tightly as she sobbed.
Safety in his arms was short-lived as the man behind them began to groan again. Those sounds echoing again and Maggie felt her stomach heave as she watched the man get to his feet. Hissing and growling as his head flopped to the side half-severed from his body.
"Glenn!" Maggie yelled between her ragged sobs. She backed away and felt Glenn's hands slip from her. She reached out to him as he slipped his machete from his hip and raised it. Her fingers grazed his shirt briefly before fanning out over her trembling mouth as she watched him raise his weapon and deliver a blow to that man's flopping head sending him back to the ground again.
Glenn was breathing hard, and Maggie watched his shoulders rise and fall with each steadying breath he took in. His eyes intent on the man still twitching and gargling on the ground. Glenn stepped forward slowly, bouncing a bit on the balls of his feet as he stared at the man. Then Maggie watched in rapt horror as Glenn moved forward and drove the machete into the man's head over and over and over again.
Glenn hit that man until finally the sounds of his moaning and hissing and gargling ceased and all that was left were Maggie's sobs. Sobs that she had no hope to control as she bent in half at the pain welling in her chest from the force of everything. She tried to breathe as she watched Glenn drag deep breath after deep breath into his body. She tried to work words into her mouth as he turned to her. She tried and failed.
All she could do was reach out to him as he stepped back towards her. His eyes searching hers as he fell into her embrace. His arms circled around her and held her tight, his chin moving over her shoulder as his lips pressed into her ear.
"You're okay," Glenn said through his own ragged breaths. "We're okay. It's okay." Glenn said the words over and over. "I'm here. I got you. You're okay. Breathe Maggie."
She dragged in the most painful breath of her entire life. A breath that burned from her throat down to her stomach and lingered painfully in her chest as she held tight to the slightly swaying Glenn wrapped around her. Her eyes lingered on the man lying in a pool of his own bright red blood and she continued to hold on to Glenn as he continued to whisper in her ear.
Callie scrubbed her hands over her face and stared at the dark ground below her feet. Letting out a slow breath through the slats of her fingers as they slid down to rest at her chin she let her gaze slide to where Rick stood atop the RV.
His body was a thick dark line against the moonlit sky. Stiff and straight and standing in the same spot she'd left him in an hour ago. Her eyes slipped down to where she'd left Carol only moments ago. The image of that woman sitting alone in that back room threading her fingers through the yarn hair of her daughter's doll as she nodded and smiled tightly while Callie spoke to her, sat painfully in Callie's chest.
Callie's gaze slipped around the farm, over their small camp area and down to the house lit up from the inside in the distance. Her hands trailed from her mouth around to the back of her neck and her chin dipped to her chest as she pressed futility at the tension and pain that had settled there.
Her mind went back to her time searching the woods with Miles. The young man's final words as they worked back towards camp, watching as Ben rushed towards them, echoed again in her mind.
This place was going to kill them all if they stayed.
Callie's foot lifted as she let out a ragged sigh as it fell back into place. In that moment she realized she didn't know where to go. Didn't know what the next step should be.
"Wrong way," Daryl's low voice startled her and she spun on her heel to see him settled with a hip against the front end of the Hummer. His arms were crossed over his chest lightly and she felt her mouth hanging open as she stared at him.
"You scared the shit out of me, Dixon." Callie said patting her hand against her chest. He smirked at her a bit and then pushed off the Hummer, slowly making his way towards her. Her eyes skipped to their tent, the light inside from the small lantern telling her where he'd been. Where he apparently expected her to go. "Aren't you supposed to be resting?"
"Been restin' all fuckin' day," Daryl said slowing his steps and stopping not far from her. Callie shook her head and muttered a quick 'uh huh' as she waved a hand at him. "By the way, sickin' that baby girl on me today was low."
"Hey, turnabout is fair play, buddy-boy." Callie wagged a finger at him and watched him try to hide his smile by shaking his head. He slipped forward then, and wrapped one of those deliciously warm calloused hands of his around her upper arm and dragged her after him.
"C'mon," Daryl said in a low voice as he skipped his eyes back towards the RV.
Callie let Daryl lead her back to their tent and smiled a bit when he shoved her inside. Gracie was tucked up on the small single person cot that Daryl had apparently set up in there just for the little girl, her tiny snores echoing even over the sound of Daryl zipping the tent closed.
"Heard you gave 'way that gun," Daryl said quietly and she let her head fall a bit before nodding.
"Got something to say about it?" Callie returned as she shifted her eyes over her shoulder to him.
"Good fuckin' riddance," Daryl said succinctly and she couldn't help but smile at him. Silence fell between them for a moment before Daryl shoved his fingertips against her shoulder propelling her towards the bedding.
Shaking her head Callie plopped down and let her head fall into her hands and her eyes close for a minute as she listened to Daryl shift before he awkwardly settled to the ground beside her. She watched him as he loosened his laces and kicked off his own boots, and then marveled when he grabbed her feet and got to work on her boots. Wiggling her sock clad toes she smirked as Daryl tossed both of their boots to the side and winced.
"You should probably be on the cot," Callie said raking her hands into her hair and freeing it from the band that held it in a messy tangle at her nape. Pain laced its way into her scalp as she felt the residual effect of wearing her hair the same way for too long scatter along her frazzled nerves. She winced and then stiffened for a moment as Daryl scooted behind her, his legs settling on the outside of hers as his hands removed hers from her hair.
"An' risk havin' that baby-girl kick me in my stitches…again," Daryl said huffing out what she figured was supposed to be gruff sort of sound but came off as humored and light. Callie's eyes tipped over her shoulder to him and he pushed her apparently gleeful face away with his raised middle finger floating in her vision. It wasn't her fault that the image of him curled up with Gracie takin' a cat nap made her smile. Hell, she was sure that image would make anyone smile.
Callie let out a low breath and then moaned when Daryl's thumbs began slowly massaging the tense muscles at the back of her neck. His hands slid her hair off to the side after a moment and he settled his chest as close to her back as he could, breathing in and out slowly and in an effort to help steady her nerves as he massaged her.
He let the silence slide out between them, and Callie knew exactly what he was doing. Letting her cool down before she broke down. Yeah, she well understood that. That's exactly why she waited until Rick came to her before talking to him.
"He's in denial," Callie said quietly as Daryl continued to rub at her neck. He grunted out some kind of sound and she shook her head a bit. "He wants to be able to provide a safe place for his family, for everyone. He wants it so bad that it's blinding him."
"Blinding him to what?" Daryl asked his hands shifting so that his fingers slowly moved up from the back of her head and into her hair. The sensation of his fingers slowly working along her scalp, massaging that tender skin so softly had her letting out a low moan. "You told him 'bout what Shane did, right? I'm guessin' Miles told you while you were out."
"Yeah," Callie said shifting her head slightly to look at him. He caught her eyes for a second before using his fingers to push her head back down so that he could continue to work his fingers through her hair. "Miles told me. And I-" Callie let out a low breath and shook her head slightly. "I told Rick."
"He didn't believe you?"
"He already knew," Callie said quietly into her chest before lifting her head again catching Daryl's eyes over her shoulder. Daryl snarled a bit but nodded. "He's not an idiot. He knew. He just-" Callie shifted her head back to the front and stared at the flap of the tent.
"Knows what truths to tell and what to keep to himself," Daryl said quietly, once again shoving his fingers against her in an almost playful manner. "Sounds like another dumbass I know."
"Yeah, we're just two peas in a pod, huh?" Callie said rubbing at the bridge of her nose. "He's gonna talk to him tomorrow."
"Bet that's gonna go over real good," Daryl said working his fingers back down to start kneading into Callie's shoulders, his chest leaning further into her back.
"I already warned him," Callie said quietly. "He brushed me off. Said he knew Shane. Trusted him," Callie shook her head and waved her hand around. "Whatever. I can't babysit them. Their grown-ass men who are gonna have to figure their shit out. Might as well let them go right?"
Daryl grunted and Callie slumped back a bit at the sound. Callie fell into the feel of Daryl's hands massaging her tense shoulders and lifted her eyes to where Gracie was sleeping. The little girl's face dimly cast into shadow by the odd illumination provided by the slowly dying battery operated lantern in the corner of the tent. Little puffs of breaths blowing the stray curls that always seemed to fall onto her face. Callie closed her eyes and dipped her chin to her chest, staring at her hands.
"You gonna tell me what you were really up there talkin' to him 'bout?" Daryl asked quietly and she couldn't help but smile as he pulled a bit on her hair to angle her head back to him. He stared down into her eyes and read the question in them as if she'd asked it. "Don't take an hour to tell a man something he already knew. So wanna tell me what's really got your shoulders so stiff? Or you wanna just let it weigh you down some more?"
Callie tipped her chin back down to her chest and stared at her sock clad feet stretched out before her. She let her eyes roam around the tent and bit at the inside of her cheek at the sight of Daryl's bags. His belongings neatly arranged and ready to be packed up at a moment's notice. Her mind then went to the rest of camp, so unpacked and settled in.
Even Rick.
Everyone ready to stay for the long haul. Everyone but her and Daryl so it seemed. The only two who had kept the majority of their things packed and ready to move. Her mind slipped back to that morning when he'd asked her if she wanted to stay and her evasive answer that she knew he'd seen right through.
"Do you want to stay here?" Callie asked quietly. Daryl's hands stopped their movement on her shoulders and tensed painfully for one single second. A heartbeat passed and Daryl started his hands again. "If we could? Would you want to stay here?"
"I want to find Sophia," Daryl said in a firm tone that had Callie's head lifting and her eyes sliding over her shoulder to him again. He shrugged a single shoulder and kept his eyes on where his hands worked over her shoulders, pushing her to get her to turn away again. When she didn't he sighed and looked up at her. "Ain't nothin' on my mind past that right now. I want to find that girl, and I ain't movin' on without her. But it ain't like we got to stay here for me to find her."
"There's always a way," Callie muttered to as she slipped her eyes back to her hands.
"Huh?" Daryl's confused reply made her chuckle and she shook her head. Daryl shifted his hands down her arms and ran them up and down slowly a few times. She shifted and watched him as he stared intently down at her shoulders and his hands. Sometimes she wondered if he even realized he was touching her half the time he did it.
Because even after everything they'd been through, he still always looked amazed and confused when he saw his hands on her. As if he still couldn't quite figure it all out.
Callie watched his hardened features as he ran his hands along her arms; the warmth of them penetrating through the thin cotton that covered her and down deep into her bones. She watched him and felt that moment of relaxing calm filter through her. A calm that only he seemed to be able to help her achieve anymore.
"Do you think ignorance is really bliss," Callie asked out of the blue causing his eyes to snap up to hers. A whole different type of confusion marred his features and she chuckled at the sight of his furrowing brow. Waving a hand she turned from him and looked back at her sock covered feet. "Nevermind-"
"Ignorance nowadays gets your ass killed," Daryl said finally causing her to look back at him with a raised brow. "So I guess it depends on your definition of the word 'bliss' don't it?"
"Smartass," Callie retorted as she chuckled. Letting out a low breath she looked at him over her shoulder, watching as he leaned back on to his hands and waited for her to just spit it out. Shaking her head she shifted around and faced him. "You're right though," Callie said folding her legs in and letting her head again drop into her hands. "Ignorance does get you killed. Not just you, but everyone around you. And I have a feeling that Hershel and his people are very ignorant as to what is really going on with this world and with how they handle Walkers. Which," she said lifting her head up and looking at him as he stared at her. "Is exactly what I was talking to Rick about tonight."
Life's too short to even care at all oh,
I'm coming up now, coming up now out of the blue oh,
These zombies in the park they're looking for my heart oh oh oh oh,
A dark world aches for a splash of sun oh oh
If I could find a way to see this straight, I'd run away
To some fortune that I, I should have found by now
And so I run to the things they said could restore me
Restore life the way it should be
I'm waiting for this cough syrup to come down
~Cough Syrup/ Young The Giant
AN: I went back and forth with having Callie tell Daryl what she told Rick…and in the end it kind of all went back to the CDC. The fact that she can't NOT TELL HIM things, that she needs him and wants him to be with her in everything. She's not a fan of keeping things from anyone, but knows the importance of who to tell what….yeah….I hope that made sense. Oh and if you're confused about the exactly what she said to Rick and Daryl …remember that Maggie interrupted Callie and Hershel's talk so she is really just working from an educated guess perspective at this point and doesn't really know WHERE the Walkers are, just that Hershel is most definitely hiding something…
I hope you and yours have an awesome THANKSGIVING and I want to say that I am thankful for all of you. Your support of this fic, in its long-winded AWESOMENESS. Your kind words. Your awesome reviews. Your love of my Original characters and my characterizations of our beloved Canon folks! I can't tell you enough how much it has all meant to me. I've been able to make great connections with some of you through this fic and this site and will forever be thankful for that as it came at a very troubled point for me. Y'all rock. BE SAFE this holiday. BE HAPPY this holiday. BE THANKFUL this holiday and CHARITABLE to those who are without.
Much love, and see ya next chapter…. Day of Barn-mageddon fast approaches. BE WARNED.