.xv.
"Nothing," Aveline sighs, shaking her head.
They've all congregated around the dwarven table in Varric's suite, with varying degrees of disappointment and worry on their faces. It's been days that they've been searching for answers, combing Kirkwall over and over with obsessive thoroughness. Sebastian drums his fingers on the table top to a rhythm only he knows. Varric scribbles something on a piece of paper.
"We've found nothing. All we know is that we're possibly dealing with a mage. I found an amulet of hers, one with the Amell crest on it, but it had been sold by some drunkard or the other. The merchant couldn't remember, save for that he smelled heavily of alcohol."
"Good job, Guard Captain," Anders mutters. "Proving worthy of your position after all."
The jab hurts. She has doubted her abilities more than once in the past few years, especially after Leandra's death at the hand of a serial murder blood mage, but surprisingly enough, it's Isabela that jumps to her defense.
"Cram it, Crabby, this isn't her fault."
"If she did her job-" Anders starts, looking like he's ready for a fight. They're all on edge, understandably, but Anders' attitude as of late has been very difficult to humor.
"If yours wasn't the name used to lure her out of the safety of her home in the middle of the night," Sebastian retorts, frowning.
"I can't be blamed for that!"
"And Aveline can't be blamed for this. None of us can. So quit finger pointing, all of you," Varric snaps. He looks tired. "I'm doing what I can to gather information right now, but until then all we can do is keep searching."
"How soon do you think you'll be able to find anything?" Isabela asks, leaning forward, looking uncharacteristically serious.
"I'm not sure, Rivaini. Hopefully, within the week. At worst..."
'Nothing' hangs heavy in the air.
Fenris is quiet where he sits, stock still, fingers curled, face inscrutable. He has not spoken a word since they've all gathered.
"Fenris," his eyes flash to her. "You were the last of us to see her. Did she say anything to you that may give us a clue as to what happened to her?"
The room is completely silent, save for the ambient sounds of the tavern as they look to him for his answer.
"No. She didn't say anything that stands out." This doesn't seem to be sufficient enough an answer, so he continues. "We spoke of... unimportant things. We dined, and I left."
Anders huffs but doesn't speak.
"We'll just keep-" Varric starts, but is cut off by a knock on the door. Everyone turns in tandem to the door. The elven delivery boy looks slightly frightened as he enters the room, all eyes on him. "Messere Varric? Message for you."
Varric drops a few silvers in his hand and takes the letter, shooting a look at her. Everyone watches as he breaks the seal, and unfolds it, beginning to read.
"Don't keep us in suspense, Varric," she speaks, not liking the look on his face one bit. "What does it say?"
He looks up at her with confusion and hurt in his eyes. "It's from Hawke."
Everyone starts clamoring and yelling for him to read it aloud, and he nods, motioning for them to be silent.
"'To whom it may concern,
I apologize for my unexplained absence. You need not concern yourselves. I have decided to return to Ferelden, as there is nothing left for me in Kirkwall, a city that has taken everything that was important to me. I could take more of it and its denizens.'" They all stare, slack jawed and the words he is reading, collectively shocked beyond comment.
"'Please do not attempt to pursue or contact me. I want nothing more to do with any of you. It is better left behind. I leave my estate and belongings to Bodahn Feddic.' Signed 'Hawke'," Varric finishes, shaking his head.
"Let me see that," Anders snaps, snatching the paper from Varric's hands. She waits for the punchline, the elaborate reveal to this stupid joke. It doesn't come. The blonde mage re-reads the words, blinking to clear his vision, as if it will make sense of the words on the page. "I don't understand. Hawke would never say this. She would never say anything like this! This is her handwriting, but not her words."
Cool as ever, Fenris speaks, with an edge in his voice. "We know she was lured away by a falsified letter. This is yet another." He looks more murderous than he did to begin with.
"So someone is trying very hard to convince us that she just up and left. Why?" Sebastian shakes his head.
"She doesn't want for enemies, that's for damn sure," sighs Isabela, tightening the straps on her gloves.
"Or very ardent admirers," Merrill adds, voice low and foreboding.
"I think we can at least take comfort in the fact that she's probably alive. No one would go to this much trouble to cover up a murder. I would think kidnapping," Aveline says, trying to put the pieces together.
"That's very comforting, Freckles," drawls Varric in the most sarcastic manner possible, recovering from his stupefied silence. "But she's right. This means there's a good chance Hawke is still alive. And that means we can find her."
Merrill leans forward, setting her elbows on the table. Aveline notes she looks a lot wiser, as of late. "That still begs the question of 'whom', though. Who would go to the trouble to kidnap Hawke?"
"Do you really need me to answer that for you?" Anders asks, crossing his arms and pursing his lips.
"Here we go," Isabela sighs.
"She's a powerful apostate, with the admiration of many people. They're begging her to step up as viscount. Of course Meredith and the Templars want to get her out of the way. And don't you roll your eyes at me," he shakes a finger at the pirate. "You have to at least admit it's a possibility."
"He has a point," Aveline agrees, though the self satisfied look on his face is irritating. "It might even explain the letter, maybe a senior enchanter would know how to enchant one like the note Hawke received. Maybe even explain why they used Anders, of all of us, to get her out there."
"I already spoke to the Knight-Captain, Cullen," Fenris says. "He told me he had not seen Hawke, but that he would stay alert."
"And you believed him?" Anders asks, face scrunching up. "What makes you think he wasn't lying to you?"
"Because we've helped him in the past. I doubt he would stay quiet had Hawke been taken by his fellow Templars," Sebastian answers. Anders doesn't seem to want to accept this argument, though.
"It's about the only thing we have worth investigating, her amulet is a dead end," Varric agrees. "Broody, Freckles, Rivaini, care to accompany me to the Gallows?" Standing, he spares one last look at the letter, refolding it and slipping it into his pocket.
"And Blondie, before you say anything," Varric adds, cutting the mage off before he can utter a word, "If they are responsible, then the last thing we want to do is go parading you around in front of them. Out of sight, out of mind."
He doesn't look particularly happy about that, but mumbles his assent. She, Isabela, and Fenris join Varric.
"The rest of you, if you have any other ideas, feel free to pursue them. We'll meet back here later if we find anything."
As they leave, Aveline is the first to speak. "Do any of you think Anders has anything to do with this?" she asks, the concern pressing on her mind. "He's been acting strange lately."
"I'm think his latest wardrobe update was just an attempt to grab Hawke's attention, honestly," Isabela says, cleaning under her fingernails with a small dagger as they walk. "She likes them in all black, or so I would assume." Fenris tellingly turns his head, stare fixed the crowd.
"Like I said before, why would he? There's no reason he would do anything to Hawke. And you see how he's been handling this. He can fake it when he has to, but he's not that good an actor."
"Whoever really took her may be trying to frame him, throw us off track," she offers.
"Or maybe he's just that stupid," Fenris grumbles.
"Let's hope we get something from this trip. I"m actually starting to worry," Varric sighs.
Isabela raises her eyebrows. "You mean all this nagging and groaning you've been doing for the past few days isn't 'worry'? Could have fooled me."
They head on to the Gallows in silence.
Author's Note: I'm never one to catch a subtle hint, really, but when Anders started acting strange after his companion quest in Act 3, I was very concerned. Wearing all black, giving valued possessions away, loosing all his humor and good cheer, all signs of someone contemplating suicide. So friendly reminder that Anders fully expected to die for his actions. *hoarse sobbing*
Anyway, still going strong at Chapter 15 with more to come! Shoutout to Avatarfan444: I thought general interest in this story was starting to wane until I saw your reviews! Thank you so much! I think the whole point of the game was despite their differences, vast as they are, all of Hawke's friends sort of became their own family. You may not always get along with your family, but you work together when it comes down to it. Fenris and Anders are actually very similar characters. I think, at the very least, they would have a lot of respect for each other.
Reviews are deeply appreciated, honestly. I'm writing this one for you guys, so let me know what ideas you have, and what you'd like to see!
Soon to come: Hawke arrives in Minrathous! Danarius is the human embodiment of a used condom! I cry when I think about Fenris! And Anders! Stay tuned!