Trigger warning: Talk of suicide

Author's note: This one is a little heavy at times, but there are some lighter moments. Thank you all for reading, reviewing, favoriteing, and following. Any comments are welcome. And if I ever depict any situation in a way that is insensitive or untrue to life, please let me know how I can fix it.

Happy reading.

Chapter Sixteen

Katniss rolled over when the alarm on Peeta's phone went off. She watched as he stretched before turning it off. "Am I staying?" He asked as he pushed the buttons.

She blinked a few times and then said, "You have a job to do. I'm just your girlfriend. I'll be okay. Prim and I have each other."

He placed his hand on her cheek. "Don't shut me out."

"I'm not. But you don't have to take a day just because..."

He kissed her softly. "Let me make a call. I want to be here with you." He picked up his phone and spoke with the person on the other end for just a moment. He hung up. "I'm yours. What would you like to do first?"

She smiled and pulled him on top of her. They kissed slowly. Katniss trailed her hand over his hip and then wrapped around his erection. He pushed himself up on his hands and looked down at her.

He grinned. "You think that's for you, huh? You're going to have to give me a minute."

"Whoa, Mr. Mellark, that is a side of you I don't need." Prim said from the door.

Peeta quickly pulled the blanket over his waist as he rolled away.

"Prim, do you mind?" Katniss said, pulling the blanket over her chest.

"Whatever. Haymitch is here. Nice ass, by the way." Prim winked and closed the door behind her.

Peeta covered his face with his hands. "Oh, god."

"She took a nice, long look." Katniss said with a chuckle.

"Did she really?" He looked over at Katniss and saw her teasing grin. He gently shoved her arm. "Better get dressed and go see your uncle."

"After you." She watched intently as he made a big show of rolling out of the bed. He stood balanced on his good leg and flexed his muscles for her. He chuckled as he finally sat down to put on his prosthetic.

She crawled behind him and kissed his shoulder as she wrapped her arms around him. "I appreciate your willingness to stay. I know Prim will to. She thinks very highly of you." She kissed his neck. "Of course, now that she's seen you naked, it could be a different story."

He laughed and looked over his shoulder. "Should I talk with her?"

"It may only make it worse. I'll say something." She caught his mouth in a quick kiss and moved away. "I'll throw on some clothes, I guess."

"Damn." He commented as he pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. "I'll see you out there in a bit." He leaned over and kissed her and then left the room.

Katniss smiled and sang softly to herself as she dressed. A whole day just her, Peeta, and Prim. Then her smile dropped as she remembered why. She looked in the mirror. Most days she only ever saw her dad's features and those passed down through his line, but today she saw her mother. She had been so pretty. And strong. A fighter like every other member of her family. But somehow it still wasn't enough to be a fighter. Because sometimes the fighter still lost or they threw the game for better opportunities.

Katniss suddenly grew very angry. She picked up a random shoe lying on the floor and hurled it across the room with a scream of frustration.

The door slammed open and Peeta stood there, ready for anything. Haymitch was a step behind with a fierce, protective look about him, though there was sadness behind his eyes. And Prim stood at the back. Her eyes and nose were red and she still had tears streaming from her face.

Katniss walked past the men and gathered her sister into her arms. "It's okay." She whispered. "It'll be okay." She kissed Prim's temple. "I love you, little duck. I'll never leave you."

Prim clung to her as she sobbed heavily. Haymitch wrapped himself around both of them. Katniss leaned her head on his shoulder a moment with a grateful sigh. They finally parted, slowly and a little awkwardly with Peeta still standing by.

Katniss took his hand and they all gathered in the kitchen where Haymitch handed out coffee and offered a box of donuts.

He looked down at his cup and sighed. "Wish I still drank. This coffee could use some bourbon."

Katniss chuckled. "It probably could."

"You gonna go to the cemetery?"

Katniss and Prim exchanged a look and shook their heads. Katniss said, "No need. Why, did Effie say something about it?"

Haymitch nodded. "She thinks we need some closure. I think she's just trying to be helpful and doesn't realize that's really the last thing we need."

Peeta said, "Graves are definitely there for the living. But there's no need to dwell."

Katniss squeezed his hand. "Thank you."

He kissed her knuckles. "I'm here all day."

She smiled and leaned into him as they all sat around the table. They were silent for a long time.

Haymitch finally said, "When we were kids, she used to baby me. I'm older, but she thought she had to be Mama. And I remember this once she tried to take up for me in a fight by staring this guy twice her size down. And he just laughed and punched me and then ran away. I got so mad. But I know if she hadn't been there it would have been worse."

Prim said, "I remember before Dad died that first snow. It was the middle of the night and they woke us up to go out to play in it."

Katniss chuckled. "I remember. I fought with Mom that day. I can't even remember what for. And when she came in to wake me, I thought I was about to get in trouble again and started crying. But she just hugged me and told me she loved me and we apologized. And then we got all bundled up and played out there for hours. Dad had to work the next day, but I think it was his idea."

"They loved each other a lot, didn't they?" Prim asked. "I remember them always smiling at each other and holding hands."

"They did." Haymitch said.

"And he was obviously more important than us." Prim grumbled.

"It's not like that." Katniss said. She placed her hand on top of her sister's. "She had depression. It's a terrible disease, especially when the person who has it isn't taking care of themselves and taking the proper medication." She swallowed and looked around the room. "I have depression. The medicine I take every day helps manage it."

"Did you ever want to kill yourself?" Prim asked softly.

Katniss nodded. "But I never tried because of you. I can manage those thoughts differently than Mom because I got help early and I keep getting help for it. I do everything my doctors tell me to do and I never miss an appointment."

Prim shook her head. "Mom wouldn't have done it if Dad were still here." She wiped angrily at her tears. "I hate her." She got up and stormed out of the room.

Haymitch hesitated only a moment before he followed. They could hear him knock on the door to her bedroom and ask entry.

"Are you okay?" Peeta asked softly.

Katniss shrugged and wrapped her hands around her coffee cup. "I was the one that found her." She admitted. "She'd made a big deal for days asking about my schedule. She wanted to know when I was working and when I would be home. Would I be home right after work? Or would I spend time with Gale? What about Prim's schedule?" She sighed. "She wanted to know so that Prim wasn't the one who found her. She needed it to be me. She needed me to do it because she knew how strong I was." He voice broke and she shook her head. "But I'm not strong enough to hold this, Peeta. I can't."

He pulled her onto his lap and held her for several minutes as she cried into his neck. He rubbed her back.

Prim came in. "I guess we should make a call."

Katniss sat up and looked at her. "I can do it."

"Just tell me where the number is and I'll do it."

"By the phone."

Prim picked up the notebook they kept in the corner. A house phone still hung on the wall, even though it didn't have a connection. It's where they kept all their phone messages and appointments. She dialed on her cell and walked into the other room.

Haymitch stood awkwardly in the doorway. "I'm bringing some flowers after work. Join me or don't. Just don't stay locked in this house all day. Go to lunch or something. At the sandwich shop she liked." He smiled and kissed the top of Katniss's head. "Love you, sweetheart."

"Love you too, Uncle Haymitch." She stood and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Thank you for stopping by."

"Effie said she'd make supper if you want to come by." He rubbed her back and stepped away.

"We'll let you know."

"They can fit me in at twelve thirty." Prim said as she walked back into the room. "They had a cancellation." She looked to her uncle. "You have to go."

He nodded and smoothed his hand over her hair. "Text all day. I'll have my phone with me."

She wrapped her arms around him and pressed her eyes into his chest. "Thank you."

"Any time, kid." He pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"I'll walk you out." Prim slipped her arm through Haymitch's and they headed out the door.

"They have a very special relationship." Peeta noted.

Katniss nodded and sat back down on his lap. "He was the real parent. I tried, but I wanted to be her sister, too. I left the hard stuff to him."

He traced his fingers down her cheek and then back up into her hair. He pulled her in for a soft kiss. "So what do we do now?"

Prim came back in. "I'm thinking it's time to binge on a bit of early morning daytime TV. Who's with me?"

Katniss smiled and stood. "Sounds good." She picked up her coffee and grabbed Peeta's hand. "Find The Price Is Right."

"Still have a couple hours for that." Prim picked up the remote and stretched out on the couch. "We can watch Today or GMA or some local wake up show."

"Today!" Katniss said, jumping on top of her sister. "Because you think Matt Lauer is cute."

"Better than having a weird attraction to Al Roker." Prim returned, wiggling out from underneath Katniss+.

"Al Roker?" Peeta looked over his appearance. "I suppose I should figure out a way to change my race and profession. One of those will be much easier than the other."

Katniss chuckled. "No need to change. You're cute just the way you are." She sat up. "Anyway, I'm not attracted to Al Roker, I just like him. I think he's funny."

"Right." Prim said with a chuckle. She sat the remote on the table after finding the proper channel.

They sat around all morning mindlessly watching TV. Prim and Katniss both cried off and on, though Prim did it much more. Katniss leaned on Peeta. Prim got up to shower after a while, leaving the other two alone.

Katniss pushed Peeta down on the couch. She sighed into his chest. "This has been pretty bearable so far. Considering."

He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back. "I feel like I'm not doing much."

"You're doing plenty." She assured him. "Thank you for staying."

"You've stayed for me. It was time I returned the favor."

Peeta's phone went off and he groped for it on the coffee table. "Finnick." He read. "Playing hooky. No fair."

Katniss chuckled. "Maybe we should have dinner there tonight. Annie invited us."

"What about Haymitch and Effie?" He scratched her back.

"What if we just invite everyone over here? Do you mind?"

He smiled. "It's your house. It's your day."

She thought a moment. "I want joy in this house today." She sat up. "But let me see what Prim thinks first. I get the shower next." She kissed the tip of his nose.

Katniss explained the situation to her sister through a crack in the bathroom door.

Prim poked her head out of the door. "Of course." She smiled sadly. "I agree that there should be some happy times in the house today. Can I invite Jason?"

"Sure. Haymitch still hasn't met him."

Prim made a face. "Probably about time that happens."

"Probably. I'll organize the party. As long as you're sure."

"I am."

"Okay. Then, we are having a party tonight."