Rifiuto: Non Mirena
"Ziva?" Tali poked her head into the bedroom. Ziva was propped up against the pillows, in only her bra and underwear, hands caressing her belly.
"Hey, Tali. I thought you went out with Ima and Abba?" The younger woman shook her head as she joined her sister, setting the video camera on the bed. "No, they went to lunch. They wanted to have a chat with Tim and Malachi, I said I'd stay here, keep you company."
"Oh, that can't be good." Tali chuckled, watching as her sister as she ran her hands over her belly. The baby kicked, and after a moment, Tali turned the camera on, setting it on the nightstand, facing her sister's stomach. She then tucked her legs beneath her.
"Does it hurt? Him moving inside you?"
"Not really... well, not at first. It does at times, like when he really kicks me hard or-" She released a slow breath, and Tali watched as her sister's skin began to move in a rolling motion. "Oh, he's pedaling... that hurts. And it hurts when he kicks my ribs especially. I have a very active little boy growing in my belly."
A moment passed, before Ziva reached up to adjust the bottom of her bra, when she felt something. Tali's brow furrowed. "Zivaleh, you okay?" Her sister groaned.
"I'm leaking, great."
"Leaking?" Her younger sister shook her head. Since Tali wasn't pregnant, she was out of the loop on the pregnancy speak her sister was now fluent in.
"C... colostrum. It's the... early milk..."
"Nursing?" Ziva nodded.
"Yeah, for when I start nursing. Tali, can you?" But her sister had already gotten off the bed; she came back with a warm washcloth, which Ziva took gratefully. She then sat back, watching as her sister unhooked her bra and carefully cleaned herself up. She hissed. "Ouch."
"Tender?" Ziva glanced at her.
"You have no idea. They've grown three and a half sizes in six months, and they're only going to get bigger once my milk comes in after the baby's born." Once she finished, she set the cloth aside, sighing. Tali glanced towards the dresser.
"Want me to get you another one?" But her sister shook her head.
"Not right now. There's no reason to put a fresh bra on when my breasts are starting to leak; besides, it's started to hurt, wearing a bra."
"It could just be all the extra weight you're carrying."
"Yeah, it is." They sat in silence for several minutes before Ziva asked, "Tali? Can I ask you something?"
"Sure, Zivaleh. You can ask me anything. You're my sister."
The expectant mother nodded, laying back against the pillows. She began absentmindedly rubbing her belly, fingers moving slowly over the skin, before speeding up. She sighed, pressing gently upward on either side of her stomach, before moving her hands in slow circles. She winced briefly. "Ow. Oh, that hurt." Tali giggled.
"What did you want to ask me, Zivaleh?"
A moment passed, as Ziva gently walked her fingers over the swell of her midsection towards her protruding belly button. She glanced at her sister, catching her gaze. "Are you... jealous?"
Tali started, caught off guard. "Jealous?"
"Of... of my pregnancy?" She stopped, biting her lip, as she pressed down on the center of her stomach. Tali watched her her sister's stomach jutted upwards. "You just... seem a little... I don't know. Hurt, I guess. That I'm getting the attention because of Amal and-"
The younger David bit her lip. How did she tell her older sister that, yes, to some extent she was jealous of her? That yes, she was jealous of her sister's pregnancy, because Ziva had something that Tali had dreamed of since she was a child? Tali hadn't been like Ziva- Mossad had never been in her future. All Tali had wanted was to marry and have a family- she'd gone through the mandatory two years in the Israeli army, and then left before Mossad could sink their claws into her. That she'd gone up to Turkey, gotten her degree in journalism, and met Malachi while she was up there. And while they were engaged, what Tali really wanted was a baby.
She wanted desperately what her sister now carried.
"Yes." Ziva stopped, her hands stilling on her belly. "Yes, Ziva, I... I am jealous. I'm jealous of your marriage, I'm jealous of your pregnancy... I'm jealous of the fact that soon you'll be giving birth and you'll have this beautiful baby boy... what if that doesn't happen for me? So yes, I am jealous. And I... I swear, Ziva, I don't mean to be, I don't know what's wrong with me-"
"Nothing's wrong with you, Tali." Ziva held out a hand, beckoning for her sister to join her. After a moment, Tali stretched out beside her, propping herself on her elbow. "You're human. You want your life to begin with Malachi. I understand, trust me, I do. I wanted a baby from the moment I married Tim. But we waited because we weren't ready- and now we are." She chuckled. "But to be honest, we still aren't. And... it's difficult, since the accident, but it's getting better. Tim is getting better, and he loves me and he loves Amal, and he lays in bed with me at night and talks to him, and tells him he loves him. And to be honest, I love it when he rubs my belly, I love it when he presses on my belly and Amal moves and stretches and kicks for him. I just... I love it when he touches my stomach. I know that sounds distorted and horrible, but... there is a tiny part in the back of my mind that finds it... incredibly... erotic when my husband touches or rubs my stomach. Is that wrong? Or... or sick?"
Tali chuckled, throwing her sister's words back at her. "No, Ziva, that means you're human."