Holy crap! I just realized how freaking long this chapter was. Sorry about that. And I'm sorry for torturing you over Ivy's loss of powers.

Unfortunately for you, my wonderful, amazing readers, things have to get worse before they get better.

Without further ado, I give you Chapter 17. Enjoy!

*The usual disclaimers apply*

(Chapter Seventeen)

I really lived like a true disillusioned teenager over the next week. When my life fell apart the first time and I finally got up the courage to leave foster care, I was careful and as safe as I could be out on my own at thirteen. The second time my life fell apart, I did the exact opposite.

To start off, I forced Emmet to buy me a motorcycle and throughly enjoyed watching Jacob freak out when he saw me drive up to his house on it without a helmet. (I am now forced to wear a leather jacket and helmet every time I take a drive) I went to a crazy rave outside Seattle and got drunk on accident when I didn't realize jello-shots were so potent. (Again, Jacob was less than pleased because he insisted on coming along and almost went deaf from the booming music... Plus the drunk thing freaked him out). Next I was literally carried home by my brothers when I tried to follow a bank robber I happened recognize from the news while shopping. (He conveniently showed up outside of the police station an hour later courtesy of Jasper) And Rose and Alice stopped me from sneaking out in the middle of the night to go ghost hunting in this abandoned house on the outskirts of town alone. (What jerks.) My family and boyfriend had become total hoverers. I loved them with all my heart, but they needed to back off a little bit because I was just as scared as them, I just didn't want to show it.

When I attacked a guy who was catcalling me from the side of the road, Carlisle and Esme finally had to have a sit-down with me so we could talk. I don't think my adopted parents knew what to do with a rebellious, human teenager, but I certainly spiced up their mundane lives a bit with my spontaneous antics. "We haven't known you for that long," Carlisle said as we sat in his study together, "but I doubt this is normal behavior for you."

I dabbed at my bloody lip, "Like I said, 'The guy had it coming.'" And he certainly looked a lot worse than I did. He only got in one punch and that was when Edward got in the way and distracted me. I landed about seven before my trio of brothers pulled me off him.

"You're lucky he didn't go to the authorities." Carlisle chided, trying to hide an amused grin from cracking his stern expression.

Esme leaned over and patted my hand. "This has been an incredibly difficult time for you. Carlisle and I understand that completely, but we're worried. You were never reckless when you had your powers and it's alarming to see you put yourself in these dangerous situations without them."

"Can you just explain your reasoning behind some of the choices you've made lately?" Carlisle asked in a judgement-free tone. He genuinely wanted to understand where I was coming from and why I was reacting the way I was.

I sighed and dropped the towel. The cut at my lip was throbbing which drove me crazy. I didn't have to experience much long-term pain, especially over something this small, but I would have to wait for this to heal all on its own. Annoying didn't begin to cover it. "Everything was taken from me when my dad left me behind. I lost my sense of family, home, and security all at once. Things were bad in the system- really, really bad. I was verbally, emotionally, and physically abused by the kids and the adults on a daily basis. It was a living hell." Esme's expression grew pained and Carlisle's went dark, but I continued, forcing the words past my lips "When I finally got up the courage to leave, I made it my mission, no, my obsession, to learn how to defend myself. First it was against kids my age, then adults, then other magic users. When I discovered the existence of vampires I trained myself harder than ever until I could fight them too. I evened the playing field so no one could hurt me again and I was completely secure in my own abilities." I grimaced at looked down at my bruised knuckles. "That feeling is gone now. I don't want to have to rely on you or my siblings or even Jacob to defend me because I already know, when it comes down to it, the only person I can be sure of is myself."

"I can't imagine how terrified you must be, darling, but it's only been a week. Don't give up hope so soon." Esme smiled, trying to rally my spirits.

I shook my head. "You don't get it. My powers came back for a ten seconds when I was talking with Ethan and I could see his power circling him, bright as a supernova. I don't want to, but I believe what he said, this fight is going to kill me." I made an angry noise and pushed back from the desk and stood. "I'm going to die and it's not fair! I just found you all. I have sisters who care about me and brothers who protect me, parents who love me and want me in their lives. There's no spell to reverse it, no power on earth to turn back time and change it and you can't even turn me into a vampire to save my life because I would literally become poisonous to the man I love!" I fought back tears when they tried to fall from my eyes. Grinding my teeth defiantly. "It's not fair that I have to lose everything all over again."

Carlisle stood and wrapped me in a cold hug, Esme close behind him. "I have been alive for a very long time. Would you like me to tell you about a lesson I've learned many times over?"

I nodded against his shoulder. "Sure."

"No matter how dark and grim things look, hope is never entirely lost. We will get through this storm." He said it with such surety I half-believed him, but Ethan's expression drifted through my mind's eye. His expression was so grim. He saw my death once, why not a second time?

Carlisle, Esme, and I parted ways then on good terms and I promised not to be so reckless and thought about what they said for the rest of the day. I would be the first to admit that I was running away from my problems. Buying useless stuff from infomercials (the Cullen family now owned three chocolate fountains and two knifes that could cut a penny in half) and occupying myself constantly with random 'adventures' to distract myself from the fact that I was supremely depressed. I had it all, a home, family, friends, and a drop-dead-sexy boyfriend who adored me, but without my powers I felt disconnected. I couldn't enjoy everything properly because I couldn't feel properly.

The random gaining and taking away of my powers didn't help my mood either. I had five more attacks throughout the week. Each seizure and intensity of pain increased until I was trapped in the torturous state for almost an hour. I couldn't eat or think or sleep. I was stressed out twenty-four-seven and Jacob was right there with me. He had taken to sleeping in my bed at night, keeping me warm because the daily IV's made me cold (I still couldn't drink water without throwing it up immediately). I barely slept, but I loved the way he felt against me. The only time those quiet moments were interrupted was when he had the nightmares. He would thrash and cry out in torment, remembering what the vampires did to him when he was in their captivity.

The night after my talk with Esme and Carlisle was worse than the rest.

"NO!" He bellowed, waking me up out of a light sleep. "DON'T TOUCH ME!"

I bolted upright, my heart racing. "Jake, hey wake up, it's only a dream!" I touched his cheek, but he grabbed my wrist and squeezed until I let out a little squeak of pain.

"No, get away!" He roared with remembered pain and his muscles locked down and he squeezed my wrist even tighter. All the while his eyes were still closed. "Touch me again and I'll rip you apart!"

I gasped in shock, he had never reacted like this before, "Jacob, let go!" I ordered, tugging my arm back. He was suddenly on top of me, crushing the air from my lungs, his teeth inches from my throat and his body shaking like he was about to change. "Jake! Please wake up before you do something incredibly stupid!" I yelled, fighting him with my weak human strength. I tried to push him away but it was like trying to knock down a brick wall with a toy bat.

Jacob's eyes fluttered open. He looked around the room in confusion and his bleary gaze landed on my wrist trapped in his hand and body under his. He dropped my arm like he'd been burned and scrambled from the bed, pressing his back against the far wall in a matter of seconds. "Damn it." He panted sweat pouring down his chest, his expression twisted with self-loathing. "I hurt you." I stood quickly and went to him, but he held up a shanking hand. "No, don't come any closer. I don't want to hurt you again." He ordered desperately.

I laughed nervously, trying to play it off. "It was an accident. You didn't do it on purpose. Plus it barely hurt." I waved with the hand he grabbed trying to prove my point.

His lip curled with disgust and his eyes went dark. "It didn't hurt?" He demanded, "Then why is your wrist bruising already?"

I looked and saw he was right. A dark purple ring the size of his hand was already circling my wrist, growing darker every second. "Okay, this looks bad, but it's really not-"

Jake shook his head, rubbing his forehead with both hands. "This was a bad idea." He said, looking at the clock like he was hoping for an escape. "It's time for me to meet Sam for patrols. I should leave." The clock read 3:56. He was just bullshitting because he didn't want to risk hurting me again. I begged until I was close to full-blown pissed, but he refused to come back to bed. He left with a simple kiss on my forehead and a quietly spoken 'See you later.' I kept expecting him to turn around and come back to me, but he didn't and I couldn't sleep the rest of the night without him.

Instead, I went to visit Alice. "Hey," I said after I stepped into her and Jasper's bedroom.

"Hey, why are you up so late?" She asked from her cross-legged position in the middle of the floor. There was a large circle of black candles around her, which provided the only light in the room.

"I can't sleep," I explained, sitting across from her. "What the heck are you doing?"

She sighed heavily, "Meditating. Or trying to."

"Are you looking into my future, Madame Alice?" I asked, gazing into one of the little flames as it danced and flickered in the puddle of black wax.

Alice nodded, "Failing to look into your future would be more accurate, actually." She looked up, rolling her eyes in frustration, "I know that we can save you. I have this gut feeling that I already know the answer too, I just can't remember it!" She shook her head, her cap of ebony hair practically standing on end.

"Maybe if I focus with you, it will help?" I suggested.

"Can't hurt." Alice said. "Hey, I thought of something that Ethan guy said to you."

"What?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to know the answer.

"You know how he said you were supposed to be dead?"

"Wow," I blinked several times. "Um. Yeah, the words crossed my mind a time or two."

"No," She shook her head at my sour expression, "I meant, I figured out that you are the one who is meant to be with Jacob."

"Uh… Alice you feeling okay? Cause you aren't making any sense."

"Sorry," She grinned sheepishly, "Let me try to explain this better." She paused, looking for words, "You were always worried that Jacob was going to imprint on Renesmee when she's born. You thought you were her replacement, but in reality, she was your replacement because you avoided death and came here and met him. You are the original imprintee for Jacob." She shrugged, "I thought knowing that might cheer you up a bit."

A warm feeling spread through my chest and a genuine smile bloomed over her face as I processed her words. Relief over this complicated question was bliss. She was right, I would have died sooner if I hadn't shown up here and fate would have chosen a different girl for Jake. But I was really the one for him. The original. The first pick. Knowing that was an amazingly wonderful feeling. "Thanks, Alice. I really needed to hear that." I reached out and grabbed her hands. She squeezed mine, curiously looking at my new bruise, "Don't ask." I said, "Let's try this meditating thing, shall we?"

"We shall." She smiled and squeezed my hands once more and sat back and closed her eyes. We both sat silent and still, breathing in and out at the same pace. Eventually my mind wandered and I felt a small slice of peace spread through me, warm and inviting. We sat there for at least an hour and a half, breathing and thinking. I imagined my powers back and we were all happy again. I imagined my life extending into old age with Jacob by my side, children surrounding us; little elementals and werewolf children who would protect the world like their parents. I saw myself do all the things I've always wanted to do my entire life.

And then my imagination took a dark turn. I saw my name scrawled across a tombstone in the middle of a desolate graveyard. Jacob, young and gorgeous, crying on his knees as lightening flash behind him. I winced at the vivid picture.

Ethan was right. I was dying. I could feel it deep down. It wasn't depression, it was my insides crumbling and slowing down. My bones felt like they were cracking, every breath stung my dry throat, every minuscule movement made all my muscles ache until I just wanted to lie in my bed and not move for the rest of my life. I had tried to distract myself from the dread as best as I could, but my methods were failing. As Christmas rapidly approached, I felt the life drain from me. And all the while, my family had been in nonstop research mode. Carlisle, Rose, and Esme scoured the internet, looking for information. Edward and Bella visited every magic shop in the state, learning what little they could about the humanity spell and elemental magic. Alice was constantly working on trying to have visions, hoping to see into the future and find a way to save me. Jasper and Emmet had been traveling from town to town for the last three days, speaking to different witches and warlocks. Each call back home was void of good news. In fact, they more or less confirmed Ethan's premonition. And poor Jacob just stayed by my side trying to keep me together and alive long enough to get the cure they desperately searched for.

I noticed my breaths had become ragged and strained. I opened my eyes and realized I was crying. I sniffed and wiped my eyes. Alice looked at me, her honey gaze so sad, they almost made me crumble. Almost. "I'm going to find a way, Ivy. I swear I will." She made a little cross over her heart like I always do when I make a promise.

I stood and tugged nervously at my shirt. "I'm going to go get some breakfast. Humans and their hunger…" I trailed off awkwardly.

"Okay." She said quietly before I shut the door.

I didn't really feel like eating. I grabbed the keys to my motorcycle instead and walked out the door, leaving a note behind that said, 'Gone to Jake's. -Ivy.'

. . . . . . . . . . . .

Billy opened his front door, bleary eyed and yawning, still in his pajamas. It was then that I realized how early it still was. "God, I'm so sorry, Billy," I said feeling like the rudest person on the planet. "I shouldn't have come over so early, what was I thinking? I'll go."

"No, it's fine" Billy insisted, smiling at my blushing face, "Come inside. I'll put on a pot of coffee and we can talk."

"Really?" He nodded, "Ok, thanks." I said, stepping inside and stripping off my rain-soaked jacket. "I'm guessing Jake isn't here."

"He's out patrolling. He's been in the woods nonstop lately." Billy called from the kitchen. I sat at the table at Billy's invitation and soon I smelled the tantalizing aroma of strong coffee. Billy returned with two steaming mugs balanced carefully on a tray on his lap.

I took a mug from him and wrapped my cold hands around it. It was too risky to drink it, I wasn't in the mood to throw up right now. "Thanks." I said. I looked at him in utter sadness. "I should have offered to heal you sooner." I blurted out, my voice thick with apology.

His mug stopped half-way to his lips. "What?"

I sighed and rubbed my tired eyes, "I was going to offer to heal you as a Christmas present, but I was an idiot. I should have done it sooner. Now my powers are gone and…" I fiddled with the rim of the cup, "Well, I'm not sure they'll ever be back long enough for me to help you out of your wheelchair. I'm so sorry Billy." I dropped my eyes.

The older man reached across the table and placed his hand over mine. It was warm, not as toasty as Jacob's, but still pretty comforting. "You didn't put me in this chair, the wear and tear of life did. I've adjusted to being stuck on wheels, so don't you worry about it. Worry about getting yourself better. Besides, I'm happier than I've been in a long time."

"You are?"

He nodded, his eyes shimmering, "Seeing Jacob with you has done me a world of good. I couldn't have asked for a better future daughter-in-law. You're just what he needs." I couldn't stop smiling at the complement and I wished with all my might that one day I might be able to take that title and become Jake's wife. We talked for about an hour, mostly about Jacob and his recovery from his recent trauma with the vampires. We both agreed that his healing progress would be better if I wasn't 'sick.' Billy and Jacob were adamant that I'd get better soon. Too bad I didn't think it was going to happen, but Billy seemed completely optimistic about it, optimistic enough for the both of us, so I indulged him.

I finally left Billy to take a nap, feeling the need to lie down myself. But when I waved goodbye to Billy and started down the road, my motorcycle veered down toward the ocean almost on its own. I parked and took off my helmet, my hair flying about wildly as the wind tried to tangle it into knots. I started down the beach, slowly at first, until I broke into a light jog, then a full out sprint. I dove into the trees, following the path Jacob took me on all those weeks ago when we were attacked by Victoria the first time. I climbed, my breath coming in short gasps, until I reached the top of the cliff-diving spot. The ocean churned angrily thirty feet below. How I wished I could feel the inescapable presence of the sea, but all I could feel was the salt mist on my skin and the wind trying to frost over my lungs. I sat at the very edge of the cliff, staring across the water with my chin on my knee. The sun drew higher, casting marvelous colors across the sky.

"I climbed up a mountain and looked off the edge, at all of the lives that I never have led…" I sang bitterly. My heart ached. I longed for so many things. Was my future really going to be taken from me? I just wished- "No!" I said aloud, standing up quickly and tugging my leather jacket closer, "I'm not going to sit here and cry like a baby. I'm so damn sick of this crying game!" No, I didn't want to cry, I wanted to feel alive. I looked over the edge at the water far below. I didn't even consider how stupid it was, I didn't consider the rain on the horizon or the fact that no one knew I was up here; I just stepped off into the air.

I dropped like a rock, screaming with the thrill that lit me up like a bulb. My heart thumped in my chest so loudly I couldn't even hear the wind's roar. Bubbles exploded around me when I hit the water and sank into the black waves, millions and millions of bubble tickling my nose and eyes.

My powers came back then. I wept beneath the waves with joy, soaking in the sensation of power. Feeling the strength and energy of the ocean pulse and radiate around me. I took a breath of water, heating the cold water until it was better than a jacuzzi. And, as usual, my powers began to fade almost immediately and I knew what would come next. Before I ran out of time, I bid the ocean goodbye. Then I spun in the water, a tube of swirling water that very much resembled a tornado grew beneath me higher and higher until I was back at the top of the cliff. I stepped off and looked back.

If I hadn't looked back, what happened next wouldn't have happened at all. I should have moved away from edge as soon as I stepped off the edge, but I was stupid. I just wanted to pretend for one more second that I was whole, but reality gave me a swift kick in the ass to remind me that I'm not.

The pain slammed into me like a bullet train. My feet slid out from under me and, suddenly, I found myself clutching the edge of the cliff, screaming through clenched teeth as pain licked up my spine like knives. My fingernails were digging desperately into the earth to gain purchase, but I was never going to make the climb back to safety under an attack like this. I watched in horror as my bloodied nails lost their meager grip and I slid down the cliff, tumbling all thirty feet, head over heels. Agony and fear pulled a terrible scream from my lips that no one would hear. I hit the water at the wrong angle, adding more pain to my body. I tried to swim for the surface, but the seizures began then. I was blind and deaf beneath the waves, only the fish could hear me scream and they certainly weren't going to help.

The seizure only lasted a minute, but it was enough. I was lost under the water and out of air. I couldn't tell which way was up and which was down. There wasn't a puff of breath in my lungs, so I couldn't follow any bubbles to the surface, not that I would have been able to see them, I was so far down it was just pitch black. I panicked, kicking my way to what I prayed was the surface, but the water only grew colder. I was swimming in the wrong effing direction!

My lungs begged for air. I wasn't used to oxygen deprivation. I rarely had to hold my breath for anything, so I couldn't stop myself from trying to inhale. Salt water poured into my lungs. With my powers, water and air traded places in my lungs seamlessly, but now, one drop of water hit my burning lungs and I went into panic-mode. I coughed and clawed at my throat, struggling against the cold hands that threatened to suck me down to the bottom of the ocean I fought with everything I had, but it was too late. The damage was done.

I, Ivy Mae Adair, possibly the greatest water elemental to ever live, was going to drown to death.

How could I do this to my family? To Jacob! I tried to swim the opposite direction, but it was so dark and cold, I could barely kick my feet. My mind grew sluggish and I was about to lose consciousness, fully expecting to meet my mother in heaven at any moment.

I was vaguely aware that my body slammed into something incredibly hard and unyielding, like a rock. Then an iron bar clamped onto my waist and start pulling me around in the water, but the tide changed and I slammed into the rocks again. That time, I lost conscious completely.

. . . . . . . . .

"Damn it, Ivy! Breathe!" Something hit my back, over and over. "Don't do this to me! Please, breathe!" I was hit across the back once more and, suddenly, water started pouring from my lungs, scouring my throat and nose as it all tried to escape my chest at once. I coughed and sputtered on my side, my cheek pressed into coarse sand. I was soaking wet and covered in grit. My limbs shook violently, but my body was so sore that the shivers only made the pain worse. The sharp aches screamed at me one after the other until it was a stadium roar and I cried out.

"Ivy, honey, can you hear me?" A voice said above me. I was turned over and a warm hand pressed against my cheek then my throat to check my pulse and slowly going over each limb and my rib cage to check for broken bones.

My teeth were chattering so hard, I could barely speak, but I forced my lips to move, "Jacob?" Daggers pierced my throat and the name came out like a chain-smoker's wheeze, but he understood.

"Oh thank God!" Jacob cried, pulling me against his warm chest. I quivered and buried my face in his shoulder, trying to syphon off as much body heat as I could. The freezing rain pouring down didn't really help the situation. "Are you okay? Are you in pain? Did you hit something on the way down?" He pulled me away to face him and I saw water on his face. No, not just salt water, tears too. He'd been crying.

"Y-yes, but I d-don't think I hit anyth-thing." I chattered. "It's so c-cold."

"I know. Hang on," He said, pulling me up into his arms and rising to his feet. "I'm gonna to get you out of here." He started running, smooth even strides that barely jostled me. I realized then that we were at the main beach. "How d-did we get h-here? Did Alice have a vision?" I rasped. I looked up at his princely face and watched his eyes tighten.

"No, dad called and said you dropped by. I thought you might have stopped by the beach. I didn't think you'd go to the cliffs." His deep voice rumbled and I could feel it in my side pressed against him. "I saw you jump the first time, saw you fall the second." He shivered, "I swam as fast as I could, but I almost lost you." He held onto me a little tighter as he broke into a sprint. As we made it to the parking lot, he bundled me in the front seat of his car. The engine came to life and he turned the heat on full blast. It didn't matter, nothing could penetrate the bone deep chill that was growing inside of me. I caught a glimpse of myself the mirror. I was covered in sand, a few strands of kelp were stuck in my tangled hair, black circles puffed beneath my eyes and my lips were light blue. My jaw was starting to ache, but I couldn't stop my teeth from chattering no matter how hard I tried. Jacob was soaked too, but the cold didn't seem to bother him in the slightest. "It's c-cold." I stuttered again.

"I know, baby, I know. Just hang on." Jacob put the car into drive and gravel flew as he drove up the huge hill to his house. "What were you thinking, Ivy?" He demanded after a moment, anger taking over as relief began to ebb, "You could've died! If you really wanted to go cliff-diving, couldn't you have asked me to come along?"

I coughed, "It was kind of a l-last minute decision."

His hands tightened on the steering wheel until I thought it might break off in his hands. I cringed, hoping history wouldn't repeat itself, I doubt I'd walk away from a car wreck right now. "Do you even care that you almost died?"

"Y-yes, I c-care!" I insisted. "It was-s stupid. I know."

He took a deep breath and exhaled loudly through his nose. We screeched to a halt outside of his house and he nearly ripped the car door off to run around and get me. I tried to open the latch on the door, but my fingers were so numb they just slipped off the handle. Jacob pulled me into his arms and practically kicked open his front door. "Dad?" He called. There was no answer. He walked to the kitchen and there was a note on the counter. 'Went to Harry and Sue's for breakfast, be home later.' Jacob sighed and carried me into his bedroom.

"W-what are you d-doing?" I asked when he sat me on his desk chair and basically ripped off my soaked socks, shoes, and jacket in a matter of seconds.

"Survival 101: if you fall into freezing cold water, you have to change into something dry as soon as possible or you'll get very sick." He explained, frantically pulling off my sweater next. I stopped him when he reached for my tank-top.

"I c-can take it from here." I whispered.

He slowed down and shook his head like he was trying to wake up, going a little red, "Of course. Sorry." He got me a long flannel shirt from his dresser and left me alone to change.

I stripped off my tank-top and bra and dropped them with a splat onto the floor, but by now I was shivering so violently, my vision started to blur. I donned the shirt (which was more of a knee-length flannel nightgown on me) My numb fingers kept slipping on the button of my jeans, I could't get them off and the fabric was so frozen it made crunching noises when I moved. "Jake, can you help me?" I called out.

He opened the door at once, "What do you need?"

"I-I c-c-an't get-t my…" I broke off, talking wasn't working. My trembling hands pointed to my jeans button. He blushed crimson, but nodded with understanding. His hand was shaking a bit too when he unbuttoned the snap and helped me peel the soaked jeans off. Normally, I would be throughly embarrassed to ask a guy to help me with something like this, but I was so cold I didn't even care. He turned his back so I could exchange my underwear for a pair of his boxers. "T-thank y-you." I said, rubbing my arms. My lips were still tinted blue when I looked in the mirror and my face had gone even more pale. My throat burned like it was on fire and I was so thirsty my tongue felt like sandpaper. But, of course, I couldn't drink anything to ease the ache.

I didn't need to lose anymore water, but sleepy tears dripped from my eyes anyway. I was so past exhaustion that all I could do was cry. Jacob, who had briefly left the room to throw my clothes in the washing machine, came back to see me standing in the middle of his room wiping my face and hair with a dry towel."You're still shivering." He pulled the blanket from his bed and draped it around me like a human burrito. "How do you feel? You should sit down."

"Cold." I said, through clenched teeth. "Thirsty." My eyes started to roll back in my head and suddenly Jacob was supporting me, calling out my name.

"Ivy! Hey, don't pass out on me. Stay awake!" He begged. He tugged off the blankets and ripped his shirt off and pressed me against his blazing chest and rewrapped both of us in the covers and lay back on the bed. I greedily sought his heat, pressing every inch of myself against him. He jumped when I tucked my toes under his calf, "God, Ivy, you're freezing." I nodded and pressed my lips to his shoulder making him jump again. The shivering slowed, but the exhaustion slammed into me once again. More tired tears slid down my face, splatting on his arm. "Hey." He said, stroking my cheek with his thumb, "You're going to be alright. Don't cry. Please don't cry."

"I should have been more careful, but when the pain came I got lost underwater." My voice hitched. The sea was terrible if you couldn't control water and drowning was a bad way to go. "I was so scared."

"Shh." He said, kissing my lips gently, "You're safe now. I've got you."

"Thanks for saving me." I choked, trying to focus on his hand gently rubbing my waist and not the fact that my little stunt today had nearly torn him from my life. Jacob leaned down and pressed a kiss to my forehead, he tried to kiss my cheek, but I turned my head and his lips molded against mine. It was a salty kiss, desperate and sandy. Warmth spread through my limbs and we fell asleep slowly, a final lingering kiss acting as my lullaby.

. . . . . . . . . . .

Knock. Knock. Knock! Ding-dong! Ding-dong! Ding-dong!

I groaned and my crusty eyes split open when it sounded like someone was trying to break down the front door. A huge crash sounded from the living room area and I jumped. It looked like the intruders had succeeded in getting inside. Jacob was dead asleep next to me, but the loud crash woke him up. He pulled the covers off and jumped to his feet, his muscles were taunt, ready for a fight.

"Jacob?" Carlisle's voice called from the living room.

Jacob relaxed and once and opened his bedroom door. "Here." He replied.

I wanted to stand up and follow him, but my head was pounding so fiercely it felt like screws were being drilled into my skull. I pulled the blanket over my face, trying to block out the light. "You had us worried sick!" Rosalie's voice blasted from the doorway furiously. "Do you have any idea how many times we called you, Ivy Mae Adair?"

"Rose," I moaned, "Shh! My head." I curled into a ball and covered my ears. The blanket peeled back and I felt sunlight from the window flashed over my eyes, I hissed and pressed my face into pillow.

Carlisle's cold touch pressed against my wrist, checking my pulse. "What on earth happened?" He asked, brushing away dried sand from my temple

"I had another attack." I said, trying to fight him for the covers. He won.

"You did?" His voice sounded alarmed. This would be the second episode I had without him next to me. "When? Where?" He asked.

"In the ocean." I said, unsure of the when.

"What?!" Rosalie screamed. "In the ocean?"

"Jake will explain." I said, motioning for him to take the story.

"She went cliff diving and her powers came back." He said, "She was back at the top of the cliff when they started to fade and she fell over the side. I was on the shore and saw everything. I almost didn't make it to her in time."

"My God." Carlisle breathed, "She could've drowned."

"Sorry, I didn't call. We both fell asleep." I said, eyes still closed.

"I understand." Carlisle patted my shoulder. "Can you open your eyes, dear?" I shook my head. "Just for a moment?" He asked kindly. I steeled myself for the pain and flashed my eyes open for half a second and looked at him before squeezing them shut. "Are you in pain?"

I nodded, "I'm exhausted, my head is pounding, my entire body hurts, and I'm insanely thirsty."

Carlisle, "I feared that's what you'd say. We need to get some fluids into you. The salt water will have dehydrated you further." He swept me up in his arms and I hissed when my shoulder's abused nerves screamed at me.

"Is there something else that hurts?" He asked gently.

"The shoulder I dislocated has been giving me some trouble." I admitted, forcing my eyes to stay open despite the stabbing pain in my skull. "I don't think I hit it on the way down, but I could be wrong. It all happened so fast."

Rose and Jacob gathered close when Carlisle sat me on the bed and carefully pulled the neck of my nightgown over my shoulder. All of their faces froze. "What?" I asked, "What is it?" I craned my neck and looked down. I couldn't understand what I was seeing at first, I thought it was dirt smeared all over me before I realized the smudges were bruises. Lots and lots of bruises. "Um. What the hell?" I asked, feeling dizzy.

Carlisle looked alarmed and rolled back my sleeves and I saw more bruises before he covered them back up. "Don't be alarmed," He said in a controlled tone that made me feel very alarmed. "Dehydration can cause you to bruise easily. We need to get you home." He added pulling me back into his arms and sweeping me from the house at top speed. Everyone was so quiet on the drive home. Jacob sat next to me, his knee bouncing with nerves and Rosalie was stealing glances at me from the rear-view mirror as she drove.

Jake carried me inside and Esme and Edward and Bella rose to their feet when they saw me looking like hell warmed over. "What happened?" Esme asked.

"She had another attack while swimming." Jake said grimly.

"What?" Bella asked, her face going pale. "Why was she in the water in the first place?"

"I felt like a swim," I tried to make it sound light, but I started coughing, ruining the effect.

"How do you feel?" Edward said, feeling my forehead with his hand. I forget sometimes that he had a medical degree too.

"Like I almost drowned and froze to death at the same time." I muttered, "Why do I have to die in the worst ways possible? First it's a gunshot by a mugger and then it's drowning?" My voice sounded indignant, but we all knew I was trying too hard to sound okay. The truth was, I was really shaken up by the whole ordeal. Jacob sat me on the couch and Carlisle breezed away to grab the tools needed to pump my veins full of water. I was hooked up to the beeping IV machine in less than five minutes. The vampires huddled in the corner, speaking quietly about my worsening condition. The human and werewolf sat at my side, talking to me about this and that while the fluid bag slowly emptied.

I noticed something after about thirty minutes had passed, something that hadn't happened before. I was hot. Not in looks, though I was good in that category, but in temperature. Earlier I had almost froze to death, but now I was hot. I tried to pay attention to the movie Bella put on the tv, but I was so warm. I fanned my face and plucked at the flannel. "Carlisle," I said. "Can I get unhooked now? This shirt is burning me up."

Carlisle's eyebrows bunched in confusion. "What do you mean?" He flashed to my side and his cold hand felt like a balm to my skin. "You're burning up." He said, pulling a thermometer from his front pocket. Sweat started rolling down my face and arms as he took my IV out and waited for the thermometer to beep. His eyes widened when he checked my temperature. "It's 103."

"Ugh." I said, fanning my face. "It's so hot. I can't take it. Will someone open the window?"

Esme obliged me, but the cool breeze was a joke. I stood and immediately collapsed. Jacob caught me. "Hey, you alright?" He said.

"Will you take me to the window?" I asked.

"Sure." He carried me over and gave me his arm to lean on. I knew the wind had to be bitter. It was winter and we were in Washington for crying out loud, but it only felt a bit chilled to me. It was disgusting, but sweat was rolling down my legs, arms, forehead, and rib cage. My heart was pumping really fast and the air felt stale in my lungs. I looked over my shoulder and saw poor Bella on the couch, bundled in a blanket, her teeth chattering from the cold. Edward stood by her, unsure what to do since his skin was just as cold.

I reached up and tried to pull the window closed, but Jacob had to do it for me because I was so weak. "Carlisle? Any ideas?" I said, wiping my forehead on my sleeve.

He looked baffled, "There's no reason you should be sweating right now. I don't understand what's happening."

I shook my head, I couldn't think past the inferno burning in my chest. "I need a cold shower." I took a step and stumbled. Jake caught me… again. "Rose?" I asked, "Mind keeping me company?" She picked me up and carried me upstairs. She turned her eyes away respectfully when I stripped my clothes off and stood under the cold water, but the water didn't do anything to help. I was about to step out of the spray when the room tilted on it's side. I slapped my hand against the wall to keep my balance, but my feet slipped. I fell and hit my side hard against the shower seat before flopping onto the floor.

"Ivy!" Rosalie pulled open the shower door and wrapped me in a towel at once, her eyes wide with worry. I tried to focus on her face, but it was blurring and the room was spinning faster and faster.

"I'm going to pass out." I slurred.

"Carlisle!" Rosalie screamed. I heard the sound of several feet running up the stairs, but I couldn't stay awake. Everything went black and I knew nothing.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

I felt cold again which really pissed me the hell off. Couldn't my body please choose a temperature and just stick with it? My teeth chattered and I pulled a blanket closer to my chin and tried to snuggle down into the bed. Then I remembered that I had passed out and I opened my crusty eyes. I was in the infirmary… again. I was so damn sick of waking up in here! I looked over and saw Jasper standing by the IV monitor. "When did you get back?" It sounded like my vocal chords were covered in rust.

Jasper looked down at me, his expression closed off. "Emmett and I got back last night. Edward called us."

"What was up with the whole sweating thing?" I asked.

Jasper rubbed the back of his neck. "It's been a while since I got my doctorate, but as far as Edward, Carlisle, and I can figure, your body is now rejecting the intravenous fluids. You're severely dehydrated and we can't give you IV's or water." He said. I frowned, Okay. How many of my siblings had gone to medical school?

"Huh." I huffed, wishing I hadn't because it hurt my head. "Am I at my last?" I said in a dramatic whisper.

"Don't joke like that," He snapped. My eyes widened at his tone and his closed. He took a deep breath before speaking again. "You're not going to die."

"I'll believe it when I go a whole month without waking up in this stupid room." I pushed back the covers and tried to sit up, but my limbs were so stiff and sore I couldn't. I groaned in pain and went still. I had never felt more terrible in my entire life. I could feel my time slipping down a drain and evaporating into nothing.

"Don't you do that." Jasper growled, feeling my despair and resignation. "Don't you give up, Ivy Mae!"

I swallowed back tears I couldn't afford to lose. "I'm dying, Jasper." He started interrupt, but I held up a hand. "You can get mad all you want but it won't change anything. That spell killed me. Victoria killed me. Wow, that sucks to admit out loud."

He leaned down, clasping his hands around mine and resting his forehead against our intwined hands. "I wish I could kill her again." He said. "I wish I had made it slower."

"Don't say that." I patted his golden curls, "Torture isn't fun. Trust me, I know." I thought back to the second vampire I killed, remembering her screams as I tore her limb from limb. I shivered, I could be a cold hearted bitch when I needed to.

"See," He said, a smile in on his lips that didn't reach his eyes. "You can't die, you still have so many stories to tell us."

I shook my head, "No, I'll take that one to the grave." His forced smile evaporated immediately. Then his head snapped up and his eyebrows bunched.

He grimaced in pain for a moment, "Alice needs me." He said, stepped away from the bed. "Will you be alright for a few minutes? I can send Jacob down."

"No," I said, "A few minutes alone would be nice." He nodded with understanding as he stepped through the door. I laid back in the bed and stared at the ceiling. So this was the end? I thought it would be less painful? But as my energy faded away, my body only buzzed with more pain. I was water-deprived, bruised, and fading fast. I didn't know when I'd slip away for sure, but it was coming. I knew it in my battered bones. I wished I had the energy to write and leave behind goodbyes for everyone I loved. I would make sure they had a piece of me to keep, a bit of a reminder for rainy days to reassure themselves that I was here and that I loved them. I closed my eyes and the tears I fought so hard squeezed through and rolled down my face. I folded my hands in front of me, fulling intending to pray and ask God to accept me into his kingdom when the door burst open so hard it cracked the drywall. "Ivy!" Alice yelled, looking so ecstatic I almost didn't recognize her.

I jumped in surprise, "What?" I said, wiping the tears from my face. Everyone rushed into the room, looking like they just won a million dollars. "What's going on?"

"I had a vision!" She squealed in relief and jumped onto the bed beside me, "I know how to save you!"

I blinked once, twice, many times, "I'm sorry," I shook my head, sure I heard her wrong. "Can you say that one more time?"

Alice clasped my hand in hers, "Ivy, I had a vision. I know how to save you. You're going to live."

So, I did the only thing I could do... I burst into tears of joy.

Hope took root in my heart and I hung on for dear life.

It looked like Ivy Mae Adair wasn't done fighting after all.

. . . . . . . .

Don't worry, that's not the end of the fic. There's going to be a few more chapters before this story gets wrapped up in a pretty yellow bow.

Two notes. One, I am no doctor, so if any of the medical talk was incorrect forgive me.

Second, I'm sorry this one was so long, but I think it makes up for how long it takes me to update and for torturing you with Ivy's deep depression. (Forgive me!)

And third note (yes, I know I only said I had two, but I changed my mind) Is to thank you all for your comments, follows, favorites, and general encouragement. It means more to me than you know.

Fourth note (damn, I should've been more prepared) excuse my typos, I'm extremely tired, but I couldn't go another day without updating.

Also, I wonder if you noticed a few subtle chunks from the books that I added in this chapter? The two main ones are a version of Bella's cliff-diivng scene from New Moon and when Bella nearly freezes to death and needs Jacob's heat to help her in Eclipse. ;) Just a few fun tidbits I decided to add in.

Have a great day everyone!

P.S. Chapter 18 is in the works, but it might be a little over a week before I'm able to put it online. I'm about to have an absolutely crazy week, so please be patient my wonderful, amazing, smart readers! :D