Hello again! Haha, sorry about this.. i may have posted the wrong part of my story..
Thank you for pointing it out "accentsxoxox"
Here is the proper chapter 17. Should be able to post again tomorrow, and regular updates then HOPEFULLY.
thank god for no more exams!
Enjoyyyyyy!
I sighed and fell back onto the bed, shutting my eyes, trying to come up with a solution that didn't
involve hurting anyone. Ha, nice joke Lauren.
"You okay Lauren?" I heard from across the room. I shuffled slightly before moving my head towards
her direction but not actually opening my eyes.
"Mhm," I mumbled, opening my eyes and staring at the ceiling. I could see her in the corner of my
eye, she didn't believe me, far from it in fact, her eyes looking suspicious and I knew it would only be
a matter of time before everyone, including Alice found out and with the way I was feeling now, I
don't think I could handle it. If everyone was to look at me the way Abi did when I told her, the
resentment and disappointment in her eyes were all too clear. How could this work? My god I
wanted it to, I'd completely and utterly falling in love with my gorgeous, caring, egotistic cousin and
there was fuck all I could do about it. I faintly heard Alice mumble something and then head out of
the room as I noticed she was dressed and ready for dinner. I turned and looked at the clock beside
my bed, realising I only had half an hour before we needed to be in reception, ready to head out one
last final time for dinner. How could I sit at a table with the majority of my family, Abi included and
pretend everything was normal? I turned over on my bed and screamed into my pillow, finally letting
out all of the frustration I felt, not knowing how to deal with this. And for the first time this holiday,
needed a fucking drink.
Joey's POV
Abi knew? Woah, that wasn't too bad, was it? I mean Abi, she would surely understand what it's like to love someone. I mean Max and Tanya did not approve of Jay when they first met him, or so I've heard. I was deep in thought when there was a knock at the door. I fully expected it to be Lauren way into panic mode, needing some comfort and reassurance which I would gladly give, although I was scared too – not that I'd admit that to her.
I got up from my bed and headed over to answer the door. "Oh, Abs? Erm Hi," Shit. Okay now I was nervous. "What can I do for you?" She raised her eyebrow at me, obviously expecting me to know she knew and then rolled her eyes when I said nothing of it.
"Joey what's going on?" She sighed deeply, sitting down at the desk in my room. I shuffled awkwardly and sat down on my bed, across from her.
"I don't know what to say," I admitted truthfully, because I really didn't. I had no fucking clue what I was supposed to say, god I'd never had a 'committed' relationship before, never fallen in love before and to say I'd fallen in love with my cousin made it ten times worse to explain. I hated all the 'emotional feelingy' stuff, I couldn't do it. Okay, lie, to Lauren, I could.
"Tell me your side of the story," she asked me, obviously wanting me to tell her a different thing to what Lauren did. I shrugged and shook my head at her disbelievingly.
"There is only one side," I admitted, "I love her Abs, okay it may not be conventional, or 'normal' but it's something… something neither of us can ignore or want to ignore for that matter." I exhaled a breath I didn't know I held as Abi stared at me blankly, clearly not expecting that. I formed a small smile in the corner of my mouth trying to desperately tell her I was telling the truth.
"Wow," she whispered, trying to get her head around what I'd just admitted. "You really love her?"
I nodded in response and smiled slightly, pretty sure I blushed too. "Mhm,"
"Okay," Abi simply said with a shrug and stood to her feet.
"What?" I was rather confused. Was I not going to get a lecture about how it was wrong and incest and how I was only going to cause hurt.
"What nothing, I get it," she replied nodding at me.
"You do?" okay now I was very confused.
"Yeah," she turned to face me again, "When Lauren told me she loved you, I thought you'd hurt her, string her a long and drop her like the other girls I've known you be with. I didn't think you felt the same as her and I was worried about her."
"Not her Abi, she's… special," I smiled confidently.
Abi nodded at me once again, "I know that now. Lauren has been through so much, and she's done pretty much all of it on her own, shielded everyone away and soldiered on. I know her too well to know she can't be like that forever, she needs someone she can weaken to, someone she can let her guard down with. I've tried to be that person, I've tried to get her to talk to me about the little things she worries about and she will, for a little while and then she goes back to hiding things to herself. That person needs to be you Joey, damn it, it is you. I knew you two were different the moment we met you, I knew she warmed to you instantly and I can't tell you how relieved I am. I didn't mean to upset Lo earlier, when I told her I didn't understand, I said it because I didn't know you felt the same as her. I didn't want her to build her hopes up, just to let everything crash down on her once more, I want nothing more than normality for my sister, she deserves just that." Abi let out a deep breath after finishing, staring blankly at me anticipating my next sentence.
"I love her, it's that simple Abi. I can be the person she cries on, the one she turns too and lets her guard down with. I've fallen for her so hard it terrifies me, but it's the best feeling in the world and I do not plan on letting her go. This holiday, I've gotten to know a girl I thought was completely different. She's fragile and not as strong as she portrays, but I promise you I won't break her." I smiled at her, blushing slightly after my admittance.
"I believe you," she replied smiling at me. "Be careful yeah?" She squinted at me and furrowed her brow as she asked. I nodded in return as she made her way to the door and out of my room. As I shut the door I leaned my back against it and closed my eyes, savouring the relief I was now feeling. A smile graced my face as I realised we may be okay, things might not be as bad as they seem and with that, I began to get ready for tonight.