LTP: Sorry for the late episode everyone, with work being a complete b**** this time of year, preparations for Christmas, and sheer laziness, I was having a bit of a hard time getting this episode done! But it's here now, so enjoy!
Disclaimer: LTP doesn't own NiGHTS into Dreams, NiGHTS Journey of Dreams, Outlast, or any of the 11 Drunk Guys. And as always, LTP does not approve of drinking irresponsibly.
9 Drunk Nightmaren Play Outlast
(opens in Reala's room. NiGHTS is in front of Reala's laptop playing one of the scariest games to date, Outlast. Reala is next to her singing a drunken version of the Discovery Channel song while Jackle plays the knife game with his own hand. Puffy and Donbalon try to Tango but fail miserably 'cause they have no feet. Chamelon tries to do the 52 Pickup bit, but fails 'cause only Jackle can do it awesomely. Selph is drunkenly singing into an empty beer bottle, thinking it to be a microphone, while Queen Bella and Bomamba rant about Miley Cyrus. And as per usual when the setting is this long, EVERYONE IS DRUNK!)
NiGHTS: *reading the game warning* Intense Violence?
Reala: Sexual content!
Jackle: WHOO!
{~~~}
Selph: Mount Massive Asylum? Really?
Chamelon: Whoa whoa whoa! Do you have feet? Does the character have feet?
*NiGHTS looks down at Miles's feet*
Everyone: YAAAAAY!
NiGHTS: We have feet!
{~~~}
*Jackle spots a man in the window*
Jackle: OH F***IN' S*** DUDE!
Donbalon: Whoa, whoa, whoaaa...
Reala: There was a dude!
Puffy: AAAAAAAAAAHHH! AAAHH! AAH!
Everyone Else: *laughs*
{~~~}
*NiGHTS vaults over a couch*
NiGHTS: Dude! I like, parkoured over that!
Bomamba: Whoa!
Selph: Parkour!
Reala: Holy s***!
NiGHTS: *vaults over the couch again* Hardcore parkour! Hardcore parkour!
{~~~}
*NiGHTS starts squeezing through a tight space*
Queen Bella: Oh no, oh nononononono!
Jackle: *random wailing*
Reala: *laughs*
NiGHTS: I really don't like this!
Selph: You're vulnerable in there!
Chamelon: All this buildup is f***ing intense.
{~~~}
Donbalon: Dude his fingers are gross!
Puffy: That's a mechanic, that's a mechanic.
Donbalon: Dude, check his fingernails, check his fingernails! Look at his fingernails!
Jackle: Look at how f***ing gross he is!
*NiGHTS inspects Miles's hand*
Everyone: *various noises of disgust*
Selph: Looks like a f***ing foot!
Bomamba: Whaa, his hand looks backwards!
{~~~}
Chamelon: Peek first!
*NiGHTS slams the door*
Jackle: That's not peeking!
Queen Bella: NOOOO!
NiGHTS: Okay, we're gonna-
Reala: Slam more f***ing doors why don't ya?
{~~~}
*everyone freaks out a bit after discovering a spider web in the air vent*
Queen Bella: Kill it with fire!
{~~~}
Chamelon: Is he bleeding?
NiGHTS: No.
Selph: You're gonna f***in' fall man.
*an asylum patient is seen coming through the door from the vent*
NiGHTS: OOH!
*everyone freaks out a bit*
Reala: Was that guy just in the bathroom?
Jackle: He was just grabbing-
Donbalon: He was just grabbing a Coke man!
{~~~}
Selph: Crouching like a N*****.
Reala: Are you f***ing crab walking right now? Like really-
*NiGHTS opens a door, and a body is seen swinging around from the ceiling*
Everyone: *screaming and freaking out*
NiGHTS: Oh f***!
Jackle: *laughing*
Bomamba: F***!
Donbalon: Holy s***, I spilled my drink! Oh my God!
{~~~}
Puffy: Yeah but go record it!
Queen Bella: Go record it!
NiGHTS: Okaayy...
Selph: You gotta get your money man!
*NiGHTS enter the room*
Jackle: WHOO!
NiGHTS: *doesn't notice the body is on the ground now* WHOA! WHERE DID IT GO?! WHERE DID IT GO!? *slams the door again*
Chamelon: WHY DID YOU CLOSE THE DOOR?!
Jackle: WHY ARE YOU SLAMMING DOORS?!
NiGHTS: Shut up, I 'm trying to listen to the game!
Selph: Yeah, I'm f***ing seeing it right now dude! You need to get the f*** out of this room!
*Puffy, Queen Bella, and Bomamba laugh*
Reala: I think I felt my blood pressure double when that happened!
*NiGHTS comes upon another dead body hanging upside down from the ceiling*
NiGHTS: Oh my God.
Donbalon: I spilled drink everywhere.
Jackle: Welcome to extreme yoga!
*everyone laughs until NiGHTS comes upon a man who has been impaled on a metal pole*
Bomamba: WAAAAAAAAAA!
Chamelon: Yo!
Reala: Okay, shut up, shut up, shut up!
*NiGHTS gets closer to the man, who suddenly reaches out an arm*
Jackle: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! WHAT THE F***!?
Puffy: Dude, save him!
Queen Bella: Save him!
Selph: Interview him!
NiGHTS: Sir! Sir, how long have you been here?
Reala: Off the record!
{~~~~}
*NiGHTS discovers a severed arm stuffed into a toilet*
NiGHTS: OH MY GOD!
Puffy: Oh my God!
Reala: Does this game have any limits!? For f***'s sake! That's just tasteless!
Jackle: What, you've never pooped out an arm!?
*everyone laughs a little*
{~~~}
*NiGHTS comes to a tight space*
Chamelon: Kay, go, go, go.
Jackle: No, no, look at the final-
Walker: Little pig. *grab NiGHTS' character*
*everyone but Donbalon screams and freaks out as Walker takes the game avatar and throws him from the second floor window to the first floor lobby*
Selph: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Bomamba: He's not so slender.
Donbalon: Noo, I missed it.
Bomamba: He's not so slender.
NiGHTS: I'm like 'OH F***!'
Donbalon: I missed it! I missed it, what happened?
*the 'priest' appears on screen, everyone freaks out a bit*
Jackle: It's the chairman! It's the chairman!
Reala: Shut the f*** up.
{~~~}
*some of the drunk 'Maren laugh as NiGHTS zooms in and out on an asylum patient in a wheel chair*
Selph: Is he moving? Is he alive?
Jackle: This is how we die!
*patient twitches*
Everyone: Oooooohh!
NiGHTS: He twitched!
Reala: He probably knows a lot about this place, you should go talk to him.
{~~~}
Donbalon: OH GOD NO IT'S A TRAP!
Jackle: *screams loudly*
Reala: F***ing A Jackle! F***ing two times!
Puffy, Bomamba, Queen Bella, and NiGHTS: *giggles*
Jackle: Hey, you yell 'It's a trap!', I'm gonna scream!
*NiGHTS looks at the in game clock*
Jackle: And it's 9:30!
Chamelon: It's only 9:30!? This is way too early to be scared!
Selph: Holy s***! What time is it?
Reala: *checks his phone* It's 9:25!
*everyone screams from the coincidence*
NiGHTS: That's scary!
Donbalon: Whoa, is it actually 9:30!?
{~~~}
NiGHTS: What if Santa came down?
Selph: You can't slam that door, thank God!
NiGHTS: What if Santa came down right f**ing now? That would be so sick!
Chamelon: If Santa came?
Reala and Jackle: *deep voices* HO HO HO MOTHER F***ER!
Puffy: Holy s***!
NiGHTS: *laughs*
Jackle: Whoa! Why did we say mother f***er?!
Reala: 'Cause we're awesome!
*Jackle and Reala high five each other*
{~~~}
Queen Bella: That's like-
Bomamba: Oh yeah!
*NiGHTS pushes the elevator button, nothing happens at first*
Chamelon: Holy s***! That was-
*suddenly a body is seen falling down the elevator shaft*
Everyone but Donbalon: AAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Donbalon: What? I missed it! I missed it!
Jackle: Hit it again! Hit it again! Hit it again!
Selph: Dispense more bodies!
{~~~}
*NiGHTS approaches the patient in the wheel chair*
Selph: NOOO!
Jackle: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
NiGHTS: It's the wheel chair guy!
Reala: Punch him in the f***in' face man!
Chamelon: Punch him in the leg!
Puffy: You have no regard for the disabled!
NiGHTS: *charges at the patient* YAAAAAAAAGGGHH!
*everyone else joins in*
Donbalon: Jump over it! Go and jump over it!
NiGHTS: *looks at Donbalon* No.
Jackle: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Queen Bella and Jackle: THE WHEEL CHAIR!
{~~~}
*after NiGHTS got the key card from the dead security guard*
Selph: Wheel chair dude is freaking me out man.
*suddenly the patient launches himself at Miles, triggering a QTE*
Everyone: *Freaking the f***out*
Jackle: WIGGLE! WIGGLE! WIGGLE THE MOUSE!
*NiGHTS successfully throws off the patient*
Reala: Yo, quick time event!
Everyone else: RUUUUNN!
*Miles takes off down the hall*
Queen Bella: Right, right, right!
Bomamba: Go, go, go mother f***!
Chamelon: Slam that door!
Jackle: SLAM THE DOOOOORR!
Reala: I bet your guy, when he was down and he was like, in on the ground he said 'F*** cancer!', and kicked him off!
NiGHTS: F*** that!
{~~~}
*after the 'Priest' cut the power*
NiGHTS: Oh no, everything's all dark now...
Selph: What a f***in' d***!
*everyone laughs a little*
NiGHTS: I am done!
*Walker appears in the window*
Everyone: *freaks out a bit*
Reala: Hide in the locker! Hide in the locker! It just said hide in the locker!
*Walker starts pounding on the door*
NiGHTS: OOH!
Reala: Hide in the locker! Hide in the f***ing locker!
NiGHTS: Okay *climbs into the locker*
Jackle: Holy s***!
*Walker opens the locker door and pulls the game's character out*
Everyone: *freaking out like a bat outta hell*
*Walker throws Miles across the room, then Miles quickly gets up and charges out the door*
Selph: Behind you!
*NiGHTS looks back to see Walker chasing Miles*
Everyone: *more freak outs*
Puffy: F***IN' RUN!
Donbalon: HOLY S***!
Bomamba: RUN!
Reala: WHAT THE F***!?
Jackle: HE TOOK YOUR LUNCH MONEY!
*eventually, NiGHTS comes full circle and makes it back to the surveillance room*
Chamelon: Oh my God!
Selph: You're back here?
NiGHTS: I'm going to the locker!
Reala: F***ing get in the locker!
Jackle: GET IN THE F***ING LOCKER! *starts spewing random gibberish*
Donbalon: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
Selph: *scream loudly*
*NiGHTS manages to get into the locker in time*
Jackle: WHAAA HA HOOO!
*everyone claps excitedly, then Walker comes into the room*
Chamelon: OOOH! OOOH!
Reala: EVERYONE SHUT THE F*** UP! HE MIGHT HEAR US!
Jackle: F***ING TITS IN MY ANUS!
Selph: Dude, dude, jump out!
*Walker checks the other locker*
Bomamba: HE CHECKED THE OTHER LOCKER! HE CHECKED THE OTHER LOCKER!
Puffy: OH MY GOD!
Queen Bella: HOLY F***!
*Walker leaves the surveillance room*
NiGHTS: That was f***ing crazy!
Chamelon: *whimpers* I'm gonna cry!
Reala: F*** this game! F*** THIS GAME!
{~~~}
Donbalon: *burps*
Selph: Peek man!
NiGHTS: Nope!
*Jackle has a random freak out*
NiGHTS: Nope! Nope!
Reala: Keep that f***ing night vision on!
{~~~}
*Jackle hears a patient pounding on a wall*
Jackle: CLOSE THE DOOR!
NiGHTS: I'm closing the door! *closes it*
Bomamba: *screams then makes weird noises*
*NiGHTS hides behind a nearby barrel*
Reala: Crouch and hide.
*NiGHTS does so*
Chamelon: I don't like this!
*The patient starts pounding against the door now*
Donbalon: OH! Uh oh!
Selph: Turn on your black light!
*NiGHTS turns on the night vision in time to see the asylum patient break through the door*
Everyone: WAAAAAHHHH!
NiGHTS: *shushes them* Quiet!
Queen Bella: Buull f*** man!
Reala: Everybody just calm down!
Jackle: Holy f***ing s***!
Puffy: He's got a wrench!
NiGHTS: All good, all good.
Chamelon: Dude this is fuuuuuuuuu...
Selph: Oh my God!
{~~~}
*NiGHTS tries to leave the room, but spots the patient again*
Everyone: WAAAAAAAAAHHH!
Selph: Oh no!
Chamelon: No!
Reala: *laughing*
Jackle: F*** no! GG! Surrender at 20!
*the patient walks back into the room*
NiGHTS: WHY ARE YOU COMING BACK!?
Donbalon: *breathing hard*
Reala: Maybe it's a cycle?
{~~~}
Selph: F***in' reload n*****!
Bomamba: Keep crouching!
Puffy: Super stealthy!
NiGHTS: I have so much more battery left over. *makes Miles leave the room*
Chamelon: Geez your running out there so haphazardly!
Selph: Reload! Reload quick!
Donbalon: Kay, gogogogogo!
*NiGHTS reloads the camera battery mid-run*
Jackle: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
*everyone starts screaming and freaking out as NiGHTS runs into the next room while being chased by the asylum patient*
Queen Bella: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
Bomamba: *makes a weird honking noise*
Reala: JUMP! JUMP!
Chamelon: Holy f***! Open the door!
NiGHTS: *opens the door* YEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!
*Jackle claps excitedly*
Puffy: Slam it shut!
Reala: Locker! Locker!
NiGHTS: *hides in the locker* Holy s***! Holy s***!
Selph: Turn off the camera!
Jackle and Chamelon: Oh my God!
NiGHTS: We f***ing did it!
*the patient checks the other locker*
Jackle: *jumps on Reala's head* AAAAAHHH! HE'S GONNA FIND YOOOOU!
*Reala throws Jackle off*
Donbalon: Dude! This is f***ing nuts!
Selph: This game, took my butthole, and...
Jackle: *laughs then claps*
Reala: And what? And what Selph?
Selph: You don't wanna know!
NiGHTS: It just, it just took it!
Chamelon: It took it!?
Queen Bella: It's gone! It's gone!
Selph: I'll never s*** again!
{~~~}
Jackle: If my d*** was a salad, it would be a ceasar salad!
Reala: If your d*** was a salad!?
{~~~}
*everyone is singing drunkenly in an attempt to get pumped up*
NiGHTS: Is that just a really bad rendition of the Rocky theme Selph?
Selph: No, that was Halo.
*spots the patient*
Everyone: *FREAK OUT TIEM!*
Donbalon: You ain't seen s***! You ain't seen s***!
Reala and Chamelon: *laughing*
{~~~}
Selph: *rapping* Stay outta the room with the breaker, or you're gonna meet your maker, 'cause you're gonna get killed by the man who is the raper!
Jackle: Selph's gaaay!
Reala: Want me to go grab my vodka?
Jackle: Selph is the new Donbalon!
NiGHTS: Okay so, what are we doing? I am so confused.
Reala: You want me to go grab my vodka?
*NiGHTS rounds the corner, then runs into the patient*
Everyone: *Freaking the f*** out!*
*Jackle screams several curse words as NiGHTS retreats to the safety of the locker*
{~~~}
*after another failed attempt at leaving the room*
Donbalon: *guffawing*
NiGHTS: This game is high school simulator 2012!
*everyone cracks up*
NiGHTS: You spend the whole time in a locker!
{~~~}
*after yet another failed attempt and freak out*
NiGHTS: Okay, so are we ready to go out?
Chamelon: Ya gotta go man,
*Miles leaves the locker, then the chase music starts playing*
NiGHTS: WHAT?!
Bomamba: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! WHAT THE F***!?
Queen Bella: WHERE ARE HE!?
Selph: OH MY GOD!
Puffy: WHERE DO WE RUN!?
Donbalon: What the f***!?
*Jackle latches onto Reala's legs*
NiGHTS: What!? He's there!?
Reala: Jackle, let go of my legs!
Jackle: I have you now!
*everyone laughs*
Jackle: You are me, I am you.
*everyone laughs some more*
Jackle: We are a team.
{~~~}
*after turning the generator back on*
Reala: This guys didn't chase you man, this guy's nice. This guy's, this guy's-
Sleph: Talk to him then!
Chamelon: Talk to him.
NiGHTS: You want me to talk to him? We're gonna talk to him. *walks up to the asylum patient* Hey buddy...
*the patient strikes NiGHTS' character*
Jackle: WAAAH!
Reala: Oh no!
Puffy: *laughs*
{~~~}
*NiGHTS is observing another asylum patient in the distance when suddenly*
Chamelon: OH NO!
Queen Bella: EEEAAAAHHH!
Reala: HOLY S***!
Jackle: OH MY GOD!
NiGHTS: WHAT THE F*** JUST HAPPENED!?
Selph: Someone stabbed you.
Donbalon: *guffawing*
{~~~}
*after another run in with Walker*
Selph: You should turn off night vision.
*NiGHTS hides under one of the beds in the cells*
Puffy: CLOSE THE DOOR!
Selph: Turn off night vision!
*NiGHTS turns off the night vision, leaving the game in total darkness*
NiGHTS: What'dya mean turn off night vision? You want THAT instead?!
Selph: It's wasting our batteries.
*the sound of chains clinking can be heard*
Reala: What?
*NiGHTS turns the night vision back on, revealing that Walker is now in the room*
Everyone: WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
Chamelon: HOLY S***!
Donbalon: Twerk dat ass!
Jackle: Yo he's got chain boots! That's how tough this mother f***er is, his boots are made out of chain!
{~~~}
*after being attacked by Walker again and somehow managing to survive*
Selph: Dude, don't be a prison b****! F*** this guy's ass right now!
Chamelon: Alright get pumped! We're pumped!
NiGHTS: I'm pumped! I'ma give it to them mother f***a!
Jackle: *nonsensical gibberish*
{~~~}
*Miles gets attack by another patient in a QTE*
Everyone: *relatively mild freak out*
Reala: Shake the mouse, shake the mouse, shake the mouse!
Jackle: Wiggle! Wiggle! WIGGLE!
*NiGHTS manages to throw the patient off*
NiGHTS: Get outta here son!
Selph: GG ya noob.
Bomamba: Whoo!
Donbalon: CHE!
Chamelon: You ain't got s*** n*****!
{~~~}
Selph: Oh he's gonna tweak your nipples man!
NiGHTS: He's gonna twist my nipple?
*another patient QTE is triggered*
Chamelon: *screams like a b*****
Selph: I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT! I CALLED THAT S***!
Queen Bella: Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle!
{~~~}
*While inside a locker*
Reala: I heard that the music in this game is awesome.
*Walker approaches the locker*
Jackle: OOOHH!
Chamelon: NOOO!
NiGHTS: I'm f***ed!
Selph: Punch him in the nipp-
*Walker opens the locker and pulls Miles out*
Everyone: *~Freak out~*
{~~~}
*while being chased by Walker again*
Jackle: If my d*** was a salad, it would be a f***in' ceasar salad!
*everyone laughs a little as NiGHTS climbs down the ladder*
Reala: DROP DOWN THE F***ING-
Selph: Drop the mother f***ing bass!
{~~~}
*after an episode of failing English, water chases, being killed by Walker multiple times, and Indiana Jones references*
Reala: Now he's gonna come this way and you gonna get f***ed because you closed the door!
*an asylum patient charges at Miles*
Everyone: *freaking out once again as NiGHTS runs away*
NiGHTS: *notices the patient is gone* Wha?
Bomamba: *laughs*
Reala: What!?
Jackle: What the f***?!
Selph: *laughing*
Chamelon and Donbalon: Holy S***!
Reala: What the F*** was that!?
{~~~}
Chamelon: If I had to describe this in a sentence, I would say-
Jackle: It's a ceasar salad?
Chamelon: Yeah! If my d*** was a ceasar salad!
*everyone laughs*
Chamelon: It's like you know me!
Jackle: hehehe, who are you?
{~~~}
*an asylum patient screams while strapped to a chair*
NiGHTS: Yeah, that's a guy...
Patient: *continues screaming*
NiGHTS: Don't do that! Don't do that!
Donbalon: Choke him out!
*two more patients appear behind the locked door*
Jackle: *starts flipping out*
Selph: Oh s***!
Reala: It's Dick and Dicky! It's Dick and Dicky!
Puffy: The rapers!
{~~~}
*after a chase scene with much screaming, swearing, and random nonsense, NiGHTS finds a dumbwaiter*
Reala: GET IN! GET IN!
*everyone yells at NiGHTS to get in the dumbwaiter*
NiGHTS: *climbs in*
Everyone: *victorious cheering*
*the victory is cut short when Miles is face to face with Dr. Trager*
Everyone: *screams some more*
Jackle: *screams louder and more high pitched than everyone else*
Everyone: *laughs at Jackle*
Selph: S*** on my c***!
Jackle: WHAT THE F***!?
NiGHTS: We just got raped by Voldo!
{~~~}
*After escaping from Dr. Trager by jumping into a vent*
Chamelon: YEAAAAAHHHH!
Jackle: *clapping excitedly*
NiGHTS: F*** you man with the ... scissors!
{~~~}
*after managing to avoid Dr. Trager, getting the elevator key, and much random rapping later*
NiGHTS: *activates the elevator* Yeaaahh! We did it guys!
Donbalon: *drunken babble*
Reala: Dude, get ready to run!
*Dr. Trager appears on the floor below, trying to break into the elevator*
Jackle: OH NEO!
*Dr. Trager gets in and tries to attack Miles*
Everyone: WAAAAGGHH!
Selph: SHAKE! WIGGLE WIGGLE!
NiGHTS: F*** you buddy!
Chamelon: Ho HOO!
NiGHTS: I don't know what I'm doing!
Puffy: Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle!
*Dr. Trager get stuck between the elevator door and the floor, crushing him to death*
Bomamba: YES!
Queen Bella: WOOO!
Reala: F*** YOU B****!
NiGHTS: HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW!?
Jackle and Selph: WHOOO!
Chamelon: Yeah you dangle! You c*** dangler!
{~~~}
*more random rapping, and burning limbs later*
Chamelon: I like that you're rapping about things that are orange then you said are pretty black!
Everyone: *laughs a little*
*Walker appears*
Everyone: OOOOOOOOHHH!
Selph: *rapping* Get in the locker, pretend you're a gay! Oh my God-
NiGHTS: I went the wrong- *runs into Walker* WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
{~~~}
*After more d***/ceasar salad jokes, Walker encounters, discovering an asylum patient washing a dead body in a bathtub full of blood, and another QTE*
Jackle: EXIT!
Donbalon: Oh f***.
Reala: That's a trap if I've ever f***ed one.
NiGHTS: Pfft! *laughs*
Selph: Zoom! Zoom in!
NiGHTS: *still laughing*
Reala: NiGHTS thinks I'm funny!
{~~~}
*the drunks see Walrider for the first time*
Everyone: *FREAKING OUT LIKE A HYPER RADIOACTIVE PENGUIN*
Donbalon: GO OUTSIDE! CLOSE THE DOOR!
Everyone Else: *more freaking out*
Selph: Nonono! no!
Reala: That was, that was corpreal, That was not corporate!
Chamelon: Uh oh...
NiGHTS: That was f***ed up!
Jackle: Ok, I don't think you understand-
Puffy: Why are there ghosts in this game?
Jackle: You just about got a ceasar salad in between your legs!
*everyone laughs*
{~~~}
*after many drunken sing alongs, more run ins with other asylum patients, and a 'moment of silence' for Gucci Mane*
Chamelon: You know what? This is a good time for that Miley Cyrus Velociraptor erotica.
Jackle: It's Gucci Mane!
Donbalon: I CAME I LIKE A WRECKING *Velociraptor noise*
Reala: RIP Gucci!
{~~~}
*while being chased by another asylum patient*
Everyone: *screams a little*
NiGHTS: *makes Miles run around a pillar 6 times before running out*
Everyone: *laughing now*
Jackle: NOOO! OH MY GOD!
{~~~}
*after NiGHTS discovers a note on the ground*
NiGHTS: HOLD ON, I'LL READ IT! I WILL READ IT!
Reala: Oui, oui, oui, oui, oui, oui, oui-
Puffy: It's Spanish?!
*Miles gets attack by an asylum patient*
*Everyone freaks out*
Reala: OH F***!
Jackle: *makes random noises*
Queen Bella: AAHH!
Jackle: *more random noises*
NiGHTS: WHERE AM I!? WHAT THE F*** IS GOING ON!?
Puffy: *mimics an air horn*
Selph, Chamelon, and Donbalon: *join in*
Bomamba: This is a mess..
Jackle: Uh oh, THE BATTERIES' DEAD! THE BATTERIES' DEAD!
*Miles gets killed*
NiGHTS: AAAHH!
Selph: NiGHTS you're the worst!
Donbalon: NiGHTS! *laughs*
Jackle: NiGHTS you're fired!
Puffy: *to Selph* You're the worst!
Reala: Why are you saying NiGHTS is the worst!? She is a god send, she is the only reason we made it this far!
NiGHTS: *to Selph* Hey! HEY! Why aren't you looking at me when you talk to me mother F***er!?
Selph: *Batman type voice* YOU'RE LOOKING! YOU'RE ADRESSING THE WHOLE F***ING ROOM, WHEN 'M THE ONE WHO SAID NIGHTS' THE WORST!
*everyone, including NiGHTS just laugh at Selph*
Selph: WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH YOU!? YOU PIECE OF S*** NIGHTMAREN!
*more laughter*
Selph: YOU CAN'T ADRESS ME WHEN YOU'RE TALKING TO ME!
Chamelon: WHERE'S RACHEL!? Where is Rachel!?
Reala and Jackle: *batman voice* WHERE IS SHE!? WHERE IS SHE!? WHERE IS SHE!?
Selph: WHERE'S THE GIRL!?
Reala: WHERE IS THE TRIGGER!?
Donbalon: DADADADADA
Jackle: *really loud* WHERE IS SHE!?
{~~~}
Reala: WHY DOES THIS BASEBALL CAP SAY 'THE STUDMAN'!?
NiGHTS: *laughs*
Jackle: Studman!
Chamelon, Selph, and Donbalon: *Dayman theme* ~AAAAHHAAA~
Jackle: Fighter of the breast steak!
Chamelon, Selph, and Donbalon: ~Aaahhaaa~
*everyone laughs*
Selph: Best lyrics: Gucci, Gucci, Gucci, Gucci, Gucci, Gucci-
*an asylum patient runs at Miles*
NiGHTS: WHOA!
Jackle: AAAAAHHHHH! HE'S SO SCARRYYY!
{~~~}
*A S***TON OF SCREAMING AND MANY FREAKOUTS LATER*
NiGHTS: ~Siiilleeent niiiiighht, Hoooly niiiighht~
*everyone else just yells nonsense as NiGHTS continues singing*
NiGHTS: ~Alllll is caaallmm~
Puffy: GOGOGOGOGOGO!
NiGHTS: ~Allll is briiigghht~
*Reala, surprisingly enough, joins in the singing*
NiGHTS and Reala: ~Rooouunnd yon viirrrgiiin, motheer and child~
{~~~}
Everyone: ~JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY, OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE IN A ONE HORSE OPEN SLEIGH, HEY! JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY~
Queen Bella: WHOOO!
Everyone: ~OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE IN A ONE HORSE OPEN SLIEGH!~
Jackle: Hey!
Bomamba: Ba-bum!
Selph: ~Dashing through the whor- snow...~
*Everyone bursts out laughing*
Reala: Dashing through the whores?
NiGHTS: ~Over the fields we go, laughing all the way!~
Everyone: HA HA HA!
Jackle: ~Following the blood!~
Puffy and Chamelon: ~MAKING SPIRITS BRIGHT!~
Everyone: ~WHAT FUN IT IS TO RIDE AND SING A SLEIGHING SONG TONIGHT!~
Donbalon: BLAP BLAP!
{~~~}
Jackle: *from Reala's bathroom* REALA! REALA! YOU HAVE! FIIVVEE! AXE! BODY WASHES! IN YOUR SHOWER!
NiGHTS: What!?
Jackle: THAT IS! TOO MANY! AXE! BODY WASHES! IN YOUR SHOWER!
Chamelon: That is too much...
Jackle: YOU ARE! THE ONLY ONE! LIVING IN! THIS ROOM! WHY DO YOU HAVE FIIIVVEE BODY WASHES!? I CAN'T WORK! UNDER THESE CONDITIONS!
*everyone starts chanting the word 'strike'*
{~~~}
*after more Dayman references*
Bomamba: Carrying like these sixteen-
*NiGHTS opens a door, two big asylum patients are on the other side*
Everyone: *screaming and hollering*
NiGHTS and Reala: IT'S DICK AND DICKY! IT'S DICK AND DICKY!
Jackle: Dick and Dicky!
{~~~}
Selph: Stop f***ing the wall and f*** something else!
Chamelon: I like cheese!
Donbalon: I volunteer.
Chamelon: I like cheese!
*NiGHTS picks up a battery and Puffy screams for no reason*
Chamelon: I like cheese!
Reala: Aahh..
Selph and Chamelon: IIIIIII LIIIIIIIKE CHEESE! CHEESE! CHEESE! CHEESE!
{~~~}
*after Mile loses his camera*
Jackle: CAMERA MAN!
Chamelon, Selph, and Donbalon: *annoyingly* Aaaahhaaa!
Jackle: Fighter of the...
Queen Bella: Photograph man!
Chamelon, Selph, and Donbalon: *more annoyingly* Aaaahhaaa!
Jackle: Champion of the film!
Chamelon, Selph, and Donbalon: *even more annoyingly* Aaaahhaaa!
Reala: *mocks the three* AAAAHHHAAA!
{~~~}
*after recovering the camera and being chased into a locker room by three asylum patients*
Everyone: *screaming, hollering, some Indian whooping*
Jackle: *manages to maintain a high pitched scream for at least 20 seconds*
Everyone else: *gives Jackle a round of applause*
Selph: Everybody clap yo hands!
{~~~}
NiGHTS: *like a sheep* Baaaaaa.
*everyone but Reala laughs*
Reala: Damn it NiGHTS! You and your sheep fetish!
NiGHTS: *perfect sheep impression*
Jackle: This coming from the guy with the mask fetish!
Reala: *blushes hard* SHUT UP!
{~~~}
*after yet another run in with Walker, more moments of silence for Gucci Mane, many hash tag jokes, mentions of MLP porn, several other real world references, and an anti-meth promotion*
Reala: GOD HATES GUCCI MANE!
Selph, Chamelon, Donbalon, & Jackle: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
{~~~}
*after bearing witness to the priest burning at the cross and rapping a remix of 'Silent Night'*
Walrider: *beats the crap out of Walker and shoves him into a meat grinder*
NiGHTS: Oh my God!
Reala: Oh my God! What the f*** was that!?
{~~~}
Selph: Knock, knock.
Chamelon: Who's there?
Selph: 911.
Jackle: AAAAAAHHHH!
{~~~}
*after wandering around for about 40 minutes*
Donbalon: Okay, so a blind girl's giving a guy a hand job at a party, she says, 'This is the biggest d*** I've ever felt!'. He says, 'Aww, you're pulling my leg'.
*everyone laughs*
Jackle: OOHHH! BRINGING THE JOKES TO THE COMEDY AND THE LAUGHS!
Puffy: Go up there, go up there.
Chamelon: What do call a French guy in sandals?
NiGHTS: What?
Chamelon: Phillipe Flop!
*NiGHTS jumps over a railing*
Bomamba: That was a pro maneuver!
Selph: How many people are in Brazil?
Queen Bella: AAHH!
Selph: ... About a Brazillion people!
Reala: ... Suck a d***.
{~~~}
*at the end of the game*
NiGHTS: *opens the doors to find a S.W.A.T. team pointing their guns at Miles* Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Selph: See! I told you this happens!
*one of the men shoots Miles*
NiGHTS: Ow!
Reala: What the f***?!
Selph: I f***ing told your c***!
Chamelon: Hey! ... Good line!
*the credits roll*
NiGHTS: ... *starts clapping* Good game guys!
LTP: Hope everyone has an awesome New Year! And let's all hope for some good s*** to happen in 2015! Whoo!