Disclaimer: I own nothing except my OC's. I own nothing or no one associated with the WWE.
Without further ado – I present to you,
Chapter 14
(Tuesday Night / Smack-down taping)
(John's P.O.V)
Since Monday night went so damned well, I decided to attend the Smack-down taping. I hung out in the locker room with Randy and Stephen (Sheamus). See I was just a man hanging out with his two best friends in the business. I wasn't some pathetic stalker, hoping to catch a glimpse of his "woman." In all honesty, the boys and I hadn't really hung out since my birthday; given the amount of time we normally spend together that was unusual. More often than not our conversations could be compared to that of three little old ladies. Together we could talk about anything from the serious (Stephen's sister's adopting), the mundane (anyone know if it's supposed to rain to tomorrow), or the ridiculous (who runs the Krusty Krab when Sponge-bob and Squid-ward have the day off?) Any given time of day these boys know I have their back – and I know they have mine.
Walking outside the locker room, the three of us posted up around a monitor to watch some of the action taking place at ring side. That's when I saw her. She was standing about a hundred feet away. I watched her for several long moments from the corner of my eye, before noticing just how damned tired she looked. On one hand I wondered why she looked so tired; stopped just short of worrying if she were sleeping at night. On the other hand I wondered why I gave a shit. She's the one who said she wanted strictly friendship. I gave her what she asked for. There was nothing going on between Mercedes and me; so hooking up with Annalise was no big deal. 'Yeah,' I thought with a shake of my head, the two of us definitely needed to come to an understanding.
I kicked around backstage with Randy and Stephen another twenty minutes – half hour maybe, before they bailed to get ready for their tag-team match. Taking that as my queue, I headed down to H's office. I knocked once, before sticking my head in the door, "Hey Mercedes…you around?" H's actual on-site office didn't differ much from one show to the next; a desk, a couple of chairs, WWE photos on the wall, and a small leather sofa shoved up in the corner. At first glance I thought the office was empty – figured she was running around backstage. I was about to turn and leave when I noticed her.
She looked so "innocent" curled up in the far corner of the sofa. Her head resting against the back of the sofa, a large folder with several loose pages resting haphazardly across her lap. I was going to leave her be – let her get some sleep. Reaching for the door, I heard her mumble, looking over my shoulder, I saw her twitching in her sleep. I probably should have just kept on walking but I couldn't. Taking a seat on the sofa beside her I scooped up her folder – setting it aside I took her hand. "Mercedes…wake up baby-girl," I spoke softly quietly. After a moment I tried again, shaking her shoulder "come on baby-girl – naptimes over time to wake up."
"Mercedes…?" I questioned when she woke with a frantic jerk. I didn't think twice – I just did what came naturally – I wrapped her in my arms. Murmuring non-sensical words of what I hoped would be comfort. She trembled gently as I held her tighter. I could feel her coming awake – slowly by degrees. When she began to pull away – I knew the moment was over. Time to get this over with I thought. "What's wrong, Cedes? Why have you been avoiding me? Is it the nightmares or…." My words trailed off. "I haven't been avoiding you, I'm fine - really," she declared as she made to stand from the couch. Picking up her folder, she moved towards the desk – with her back to me she spoke. "If you're looking H he said something about heading to the men's locker room – looking for Kofi or something I think."
Standing from the sofa, I watched as she sorted several pages – attempting to look too busy to talk I guessed. The silence was deafening. Ok, so I guess the next move is up to me. "Wasn't looking for H," I told her quietly. "Forgive me baby girl, but someone's lying... Remember what happens when you're naughty?" I needed to keep the mood light. I wasn't interested in arguing with her. Besides the fiery blush I knew to expect at the mere implication of paddling her ass was too much to resist.
"John, stop." She glared up at up me blushing hotly her words flustered," Friends remember."
Sitting on the edge of the desk, I was quiet for a long moment and then two I nodded choosing my next words with care "I remember, but I think you forgot. I know the situation you caught me in was a little awkward to say the least, but you were the one that chose to be friends, Mercedes."
Slowly she looked at me her eyes filled with life and emotion. "I know, I just..." her words ended quickly as she looked away.
"Just what?" I questioned, "Just maybe you're jealous?" I supplied almost certain I was right,
"Get over yourself Cena, I'm not jealous." She declared as she rolled the desk chair back, anger flashing in her eyes as she stood to face me. "You were just a rude ass to answer the phone. Maybe you wanted to rub in my face that how quickly the 'great John Cena' can move on."
Standing I slammed my hand against the desk "That's bullshit and you know it. You just don't want to admit to yourself that there is something between us; something very fucking explosive. Or just maybe you're scared. But instead of facing what you're afraid of, you decided to run away. We can be friends all you want, Cedes. I'm not against it. I like you. But... you can't have it both ways Mercedes. You need to decide what you want – what you're willing to fight for. Because as cliché as it may sound there are things that I want and need."
I watched her grow very quiet, seemingly lost in thought. I would have given just about anything to be inside that pretty little head of hers right that very moment. "So," she spoke breaking the nearing uncomfortable silence "now what?"
Tucking my fingers under her chin, I forced her to look me in the eye. "I'm here Cedes and I'll wait for as long as I can. So whenever you're ready... you come find me; but I won't wait forever." Dropping two soft kisses across her forehead – I exited the office and didn't look back.
WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE
(Mercedes' P.O.V.)
I'd moved to the sofa because the desk chair was driving me crazy. I hadn't planned on falling asleep. Even without the nightmares, I still wasn't sleeping for shit. I should have known better. The minute I got comfortable I was out like a light. I don't know how long I was out. One minute I'm dreaming and the next I'm waking up in John's arms. Damn did he smell good! At first it felt nice to just be held. He rubbed his hand up and down my back murmuring what I don't recall, but it made me feel better none the less. Fully awake and free of the dream – his embrace seemed a little uncomfortable so I pulled back. The loss of warmth – of human contact was immediate. A part of me wanted to slide back into his embrace and stay there for a very long time to come.
"What's wrong, Cedes? Why have you been avoiding me? Is it the nightmares or…." His words trailed off. Something inside me was very grateful he didn't finish that thought.
"I haven't been avoiding you, I'm fine - really," I stated with more calm than I actually felt. Sitting beside him on the sofa, I noticed my hands in my lap – nearly trembling. I needed to keep busy. Standing I picked up my folder and moved to the desk. Without facing him I as casually as I could mention "If you're looking H he said something about heading to the men's locker room – looking for Kofi or something I think."
I felt it more than saw it when he stood from the sofa and approached the desk. I tried to distract myself – I needed to sort out these contracts for Paul. The ensuring silence over whelming me I nearly wanted to scream. "Wasn't looking for H," he whispered into the silence. "Forgive me baby girl, but someone's lying... Remember what happens when you're naughty?"
The brief and all too sexy smile spread quickly and was gone just as fast. I knew he was trying to lighten the tension – I appreciated it – it didn't help, but I appreciated it none the less. I was certain that my face was a beautiful shade of red right now. I could I expect to survive a full blown sexual relationship with John; if his merely mentioning paddling me has blushing like a fourteen-year old school girl. "John, stop." I gave him my best hard stare. The best I could manage anyway considering my face was currently turning fifty shades of fiery red." Friends remember."
I watched without comment as he perched his large frame on the corner of my desk. I expected and immediate response. When he said nothing for several long moments, I found myself studying him. Even if he weren't a professional wrestler, he would still be a very handsome man. Deep blue eyes that a woman could easily and willingly get lost in. I was nearly lost in thought when he finally broke the silence once more.
"I remember, but I think you forgot. I know the situation you caught me in was a little awkward to say the least, but you were the one that chose to be friends, Mercedes."
It took only seconds for his words to digest. Was he serious – I called while he was in bed with another woman and he's calling it awkward? He answers the phone and talks to me while he's in bed with another woman and he's calling it awkward. "I know, I just..."I stopped unsure what to say next. Awkward just did not begin to covering what I was thinking or feeling right now.
"Just what, "he challenged? "Just maybe you're jealous?" I could hear the certainty in his voice. He was so sure he was right. Ugghh Men! Can't live with them – damn sure can't shot them.
"Get over yourself Cena, I'm not jealous." I shoved my chair away from the desk, certain my emotions were flashing vividly across my face. "You were just a rude ass to answer the phone. Maybe you wanted to rub in my face that how quickly the 'great John Cena' can move on."
His hand slamming against the desk startled me – a reaction I was sure he was aiming for! "That's bullshit and you know it. You just don't want to admit to yourself that there is something between us; something very fucking explosive. Or just maybe you're sacred. But instead of facing what you're afraid of, you decided to run away. We can be friends all you want, Cedes. I'm not against it. I like you. But... you can't have it both ways Mercedes. You need to decide what you want – what you're willing to fight for. Because as cliché as it may sound there are things that I want and need."
'Wants and needs' my mind screamed at me. Did I even know anymore what I wanted or needed? How could I worry about his wants and needs when I didn't even know what the hell mine were? Holy shit! I was in deep danger of drowning here and I had no idea how to get out.
"So," I asked breaking a now very uncomfortable silence – asking what I hoped he had a good answer for "now what?"
His fingers tucked under my chin forcing me to meet his gaze – those beautiful deep blue eyes will surely be the death of me one day. "I'm here Cedes and I'll wait for as long as I can. So whenever you're ready... you come find me; but I won't wait forever." With gentleness most women can only dream about he dropped two soft kisses across my forehead and then turned to exit the office. Watching him leave, I noted for the first time that my uncle was standing just outside the open doorway. Son-of-a-bitch I grumbled mostly to myself how much had he seen or heard? Without any question this was the very last thing I needed right now. Entering the office he gently closed the door behind him. "Everything ok Mercedes?" he questioned innocently enough.
"Sure" I replied with a little more enthusiasm than was actually called for.
"I saw John leaving just now – everything ok between you two?"
What a loaded question I thought with an inward giggle. I could hear the concern in his voice – I knew he was just trying to look out for me. I wondered which he would choose if he knew; if he knew that the face of company had me twisted in knots thinking about be paddled hard. Would he still be concerned about me or would be concerned with beating John's ass all over this arena? "No – No Uncle Paul everything is fine. John was just dropping by to check up on me. You know being a good friend and all!" He didn't question me further, but I could tell from the look on his face that he didn't entirely buy my answers either.
I spent the rest of the show in the office. Getting caught up after my little "cat-nap" was harder than you might think. Blissfully Smack-down ended with incident nearly forty-five minutes later. Coming back from the gorilla position – Uncle Paul came in just as I packing up the office. He had a couple of meetings nearby tomorrow morning so he wouldn't be leaving for CT until tomorrow afternoon. I on the other hand was booked on a flight home tonight.
It was well after one a.m. when I finally crawled into my own bed and fell asleep. Boy it was sure nice to be home. Things were buzzing around WWE. Only one week until Extreme Rules. My first couple of days home I managed to stay busy. I was working in the office. I loved being on the road, but there was a different energy working in the office – a rhythm that I just fell into naturally. By Friday afternoon though I admit I was a little of step. Thoughts of John were catching up with me. I'd been dreaming about him for days. Some were down right terrifying. I would be trapped in that damned truck unable to help myself, Jake, or more importantly John. Others were terrifying for other reasons; I would wake up aching, needy, and alone.
Walking in the front door, I slipped off my heels and headed for the kitchen. I was a little surprised to see Aunt Stephanie sitting at the table with the girls; giggling over peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with big glasses of milk. Standing just inside the door way I stood watching the girls enjoy some quality mommy and me time. They were all growing up so fast. Aurora and Murphy looking more like their momma every day. Little Vaughan was definitely going to take after Uncle Paul with all that long blonde hair. I watched as Aunt Stephanie helped the girls clean up their messes, before letting them run off to play. I smiled as each girl stopped in the doorway to give me a big hug before heading off to the living room.
Taking a seat at the table – I smiled. "You would make an awesome mom Mercedes," chimed in my Aunt Stephanie from the sink.
"I'm not so sure about that Aunt Steph," I replied hedging around the topic, unsure where she was headed with that particular comment.
"I am" she replied with simple straight forward confidence. "I've seen you with the girls. Those three simply adore you – your loving, patient, kind, and giving with them. Any little boy or girl would very blessed to call you mommy."
I snorted probably a most un-lady like gesture, but somehow it seemed more than appropriate. "Only one problem with that theory Aunt Steph."
"Only one – let's hear it. You forget baby girl I'm a McMahon. Give us problem and watch us go to work."
"First I need to find a man who feels very blessed to call me his – before I can think about blessed bundles of joy."
"Oh" Aunt Stephanie commented mildly before sitting down across from at the table. "I guess I assumed that was already a possibility."
I nearly choked. "A possibility Aunt Stephanie? What on earth made you think that?"
Laughing easy and gentle, "It doesn't take an Einstein to see that you have been seriously preoccupied around here the last few days; I had just hoped that it was a sign of positive things on the horizon for you. If it's not a man that's consuming your thoughts – what is?"
"Well," I hedge a little not really sure that I wanted to share with my Aunt any more than I wanted to share with Uncle Paul a few days ago. "Aw, Hell" I thought to myself just for it. "I guess in the strictest sense I am preoccupied with a man, but in the way you think."
"So, in the strictest sense it's a man. A man I'm assuming you don't as a romantic possibility. If that's the case then how do you see him; not to mention which man are we talking about exactly?"
As I blurted out the words "John Cena," my inner voice screamed will you ever learn to keep your big damned mouth shut? I'm not entirely sure I know what reaction I was expecting from her, but calm silence wasn't it.
"Uh are you going to say something Aunt Steph," I inquired with a brief if somewhat skittish smile.
"You and John are just friends?" She asked without a hint of what she was really thinking flashing across her smooth poker face.
I'd learned to hate her poker face as a child – good to see some things never change. "Were just friends Aunt Steph, honest."
"Well for "just friends" accompanied by what I'm sure she thought were cute little air quotes "he seems to have certainly taken over your thoughts lately."
"Can't friends worry about each other from time to time?"
"Sure they can," came her swift reply, "have you two become fast friends?"
I sighed, knowing that I would probably regret this I pushed on with more of the truth than I was really comfortable with. "Hell if I know what we are these days Aunt Steph!"
Reaching across the table, she squeezed my hand – smiling at me reassuringly. I felt like I did when I was a school girl taking her all my childish adolescent problems and praying she could fix them. "So talk to him and find out – see where you two stand."
"It's not as simple as all that Aunt Steph,"
Shaking her head she moved, taking the seat right next to mine she smiled brief, patient, and all too motherly. "Remember a few weeks ago when you were home and we talked about John?"
"Yeah what about it" I asked curiously?
"He's more to me than just a WWE superstar Mercedes. I worry about him – in some ways every bit as much as one of my girls. He has such a – I don't know – a dark sadness about him these days. Not unlike the one I see in you some nights. If you two can help each – heal for lack of a better word – then I am all for it."
I was starting to grow a little uncomfortable with this whole conversation. "Where are you going with all this Aunt Steph?" As soon as the question left my mouth, I knew her wheels were already spinning – she was already scheming and plotting. "Aunt Steph what are you plotting over there?"
"Who said I'm plotting anything? Just because I have an idea and I'm a McMahon does not mean that I'm "plotting."
"Yeah Aunt Steph it usually does - so out with it."
"I think you should go and talk to John right now – this weekend."
"This weekend?" I asked completely caught off guard. "I've got so much I promised Uncle Paul I would do – I don't have time to go see John. Besides I'm not even sure where he is this weekend."
"All stuff you can do from a lap-top right? So take your lap-top with you and do it there." Holding up her hand she smiled effectively cutting off my protest "As for not knowing exactly where he is – I can fix that." Snatching the phone from the table she quickly dialed. Drumming her nails against the table almost impatiently as she waited for the other party to answer. "Hello Mack… its Stephanie Levesque….I'm good, How are you? That's great to hear Mac – really is. Yes the girls are doing great! Yes they are getting bigger every minute. Listen the reason I was calling, I was wondering where exactly you and John are this weekend?" Jotting notes on the back of an envelope she laughed. "Listen Mack, Mercedes and I have been talking – and I think it's a good idea if she flies out to meet up with you and John for weekend. What do you think? Laughing heartily, Stephanie shook her head "Mack I could not agree with you more. Great…that's great then it's settled. We will get Mercedes on the first flight out. Yes, I'll let you know." Laughing once more she smiled "Yes Mack I promise. Thank you, you have no idea how much this helps. Ok will talk soon – take care"
Hanging up with Mack, Aunt Stephanie immediately dialed the airport. "Great," I thought "this day just keeps getting better and better." Within half an hour I was booked on a flight to Pennsylvania the promise that Mack would pick me up at the airport.
My flight was perfect. I landed right on time and true to his word Mack was waiting at baggage claim to pick me up. As we loaded my things into Mack's rental, I learned that John was guest staring on a new TV. show that was doing some filming in her Pennsylvania. Mack didn't except him back for another couple of hours. Mack I found was just as happy about my coming out to surprise John as my Aunt Steph was. Me on the other hand – I still wasn't sure it was a good idea. We drove back to the hotel making idle conversation. I learned that Mack was just fifty-two years old, not only was he retired U.S. military; he was a widow, with two grown children, and expecting his first grandchild in the fall. As we pulled into the hotel parking lot Mack explained that he usually just stayed on board the bus during trips like this. He explained that John had a room at the hotel for the weekend, but that he always stopped by the bus before heading up to his room.
As we boarded the bus I smiled, remembering John watching the Three Stooges with me. Mack was a true gentleman and a gracious host as we waited together for John's return. He insisted on making us a late dinner – nothing special just sandwiches and chips. After the flight and not having eaten since around noon Mack's sandwiches tasted divine.
"Mercedes," Mack began cautiously as I finished the last bit of my sandwich "If you don't mind me saying you look as if you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. Is there anything I can do to help?"
I studied the older man carefully. John had mentioned that Mack had been driving for him for a while now. I sensed from the way they interacted with each other that they had built a friendship a trust between each other. I wondered how well Mack knew John and if he would be willing to shed some light on things for me. "Mack" I began with as much caution, if not more than he used mere moments ago. "I know you've been driving with John a while now – right?"
"Yes ma'am" he replied "almost two years now."
"Would you say you've gotten to know John pretty well?"
"I would – I would like to think that John and I have become pretty good friends over the last couple of years. He's a good man. Why do you ask?"
When I didn't answer right away Mack spoke soft and gruff. "Whatever you say – stays here. I wouldn't repeat it John."
"I appreciate that Mack." I spoke quietly – drawing in a deep breath I smiled weak and sad "I think your right Mack; I think he is a good man. I see a good man with a big heart. I just wonder if his heart is big enough to forgive me."
"Forgive you for what Mercedes?"
"I hurt a man Mack…I hurt him bad…" my words fell away as my voice grew soft and emotional.
Mack looked at me a little puzzled – as if unsure how best to continue. "I'm thinking John and this other fella, would both have no problem forgiving you."
"John maybe" I whispered "that other "fella" he's dead because of me."
WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA WWE CENA
(John's P.O.V.)
The long drive back to the hotel was just what I needed – me and my thoughts alone with nothing but the radio for company. I loved listening to the radio, but I was a constant channel surfer. When you listened to as many different genres of music as I did it was nearly impossible to not find something on with listening to.
Professionally speaking the day had been perfect. The director on set was great to work with. He had a very clear image of what he wanted for the show. He was direct and honest. I could appreciate working with someone like that. He was also fabulous about my shooting schedule – knowing that I only had a few days to get my scenes shot. Today was our best day yet. I think we managed to get all of my stuff in and finished before we left. I was in town for one more day, so I drive out to the set tomorrow and finish up in last minute loose ends.
As I followed the curve of the road my thoughts turned to Mercedes. I hadn't spoken to her since I left Paul's office Tuesday night. I promised her I would wait – and I would. I just couldn't help but wonder if she would ever come to trust me – to really trust me with whatever demons were obviously chasing her.
It was more than an hour and half later, when I finally pulled into the hotel parking lot. I was tempted to just head upstairs to my hotel room. A hot shower, a little room service, an old movie, and some much needed rest sounded like a great idea to me at the moment. As I pulled up near where Mack and the bus were parked – I noted that the lights were still on. Given the late hour I'd figured chances were more than good that Mack would have already crashed.
Boarding the bus, I noted Mack in his usual seat with his feet propped up - the TV turned down low. "Hey Mack what's up? I kind of…" My words greeted by a sharp shushing sound as the older man placed a finger against his lips motioning for me to be quieter. Confused, I followed his gaze and he gestured towards the full sofa. Wrapped up in an old blue throw, clutching a pillow from my bed tight – was a very sound asleep Mercedes.
Pointing towards the sofa, I questioned "What's she doing here?"
Mack all but beamed, "I picked her up at the airport a few hours ago. I think she really needed to see you." I could tell there was more on the man's mind than he was saying. "Um, John…I don't want to over step here, I don't know what the relationship is between you two, but if care about her as much as I think – listen really listen to her when she's ready to talk."
Little puzzled I just nodded "Yeah Mack – sure!"
Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who reviews, follows, or adds this story to their favorites list. Special thanks go out to ParkAvenue, MyTimeisNow, Lady Isadorra, (4) different Guest reviews, therealchamps, and a special thanks to TakerAlways for all of the great assist with this chapter I appreciate it.