NiGHTS: LTP doesn't own NiGHTS into Dreams, NiGHTS Journey of Dreams, or Dick Figures.
Ocho Muerte
(opens in Reala's room where Reala is cooking up a French dish while NiGHTS is sitting on the couch, sipping a glass of wine)
NiGHTS: Reala, I didn't know you could cook.
*the camera zooms in on Reala's brain*
Reala: *thinking* I'm totally getting laid! *out loud* Oh yeah, just a little beef bourguignon. Like our first date!
NiGHTS: Oh, that's so sweet!
*the camera zooms down to Reala's crotch*
Reala: *crotch* Good job.
*there's a knock on the door & Reala speaks from 3 different parts of his body*
Reala: *brain* No! *talking out loud* Damn it! *crotch again* F***! *talks to NiGHTS* Just a momenta mon petit chéri poo poo. *brain again* My bad. *crotch once more* Oh, real nice!
*Reala leaves his room & Jackle is at the door*
Jackle: 'Sup, b****?
Reala: Dude, NiGHTS' over! We're on a date, you got to get the hell out of here!
Jackle: Hold on. I got to check on my pet octopus, *deep voice with dramatic music* Ocho Muerte.
Reala: Your pet what?!
NiGHTS: *walking to the bathroom, singing to the tune of "Camptown Races"* ~I gotta take a real fast dump. Doo da doo da. Boys can't know that girls go poop...~
*Ocho Muerte, an orange octopus with red eyes, breaks through the door*
NiGHTS: Whoa, WHAT THE F***?!
*NiGHTS runs around the room while Ocho Muerte chases after her*
Jackle: She's released the kraken!
*Reala struggles to get back in the room*
Reala: NiGHTS! *tries to open the door, but doesn't open* Are you kidding me? I locked myself out!
NiGHTS: *from the room, her voice is muffled* Reala, help!
Jackle: Yeah, she should be careful. I haven't fed that s*** in, like, a week.
*Reala continues to struggle with the door while Jackle begins to float in the air. Meanwhile, NiGHTS screams as she is pursued by Ocho Muerte & accidentally sets the room blaze*
NiGHTS: AAAHHH! *muffled voice* The room's on fire!
Reala: Hang on! *searches his pockets for his keys* Where the hell are my keys?!
Jackle: Stacy said I should swallow them to keep them safe!
Reala: *he and his brain scream while his crotch says "f***"* Come on, we'll try the window.
*Reala & Jackle run outside to climb up a rain pipe*
Reala: Ok, I'll climb up! Spot me in case I fall!
Jackle: Nah, I'm gonna go eat trash out of the dumpster.
Reala: Why?!
Jackle: So I can s*** out the keys!
Reala: Oh, my Wizeman!
Jackle: *jumps into the dumpster* Oh, that's where I left that burrito...
*NiGHTS tries to throw a knife at Ocho Muerte, but sends it out the window almost hitting Reala and embedding itself in Jackle's head*
Reala: What was that?
*Jackle pops out of the trash & starts mumbling stuff with a knife in his head, blood coming out. Reala shudders & continues to climb. The first window he looks into shows Owl working out, but then falls in half. Reala then climbs to the next window to see Donbalon fapping at the computer*
Donbalon: Olivia Wilde, come on.
*Reala shudders as Donbalon notices Reala*
Donbalon: Y U No Knock?
*Reala climbs to the next room to see NiGHTS fending off Ocho Muerte with a broom*
Reala: NiGHTS! The window!
*NiGHTS is finally able to lay a hit on Ocho Muerte, which causes it to hit Reala's face & launches both of them off of the building with the rain pipe*
Jackle: Where you going, man? This dumpster's full of burritos!
*NiGHTS then jumps out of the room, just as it explodes, into the dumpster with Jackle. Reala & Ocho Muerte fall into Clawz's room, who then comes out wielding a butcher's knife & wearing a bandana with the Japanese red sun on it*
Clawz: We meet again, Ocho Muerte.
*Reala walks back to Jackle, shards of glass in his head, while NiGHTS cries & Jackle eats a burrito*
Reala: Let's just order a take-out.
*Jackle holds out his burrito to Reala*
Jackle: Want some?
Reala: No... You have a knife in your head.
Jackle: You have a knife in your head!
*Jackle crams the burrito into his mouth, takes the knife out of his head, and throws it onto Reala's face*
LTP: Jackle, I thought we banished all those demons back to Hell, why the hell was there one locked in Reala's bathroom?
Jackle: My bathtub is occupied by Robbie the magical tapeworm, so I couldn't put him in there. I thought it'd be cool to have a demon octopus for a pet.
LTP: *sarcastically* Well, why don't ya just summon Cthulu while you're at it? Maybe you can have him over for a tea party before causing some mayhem and chaos.
Jackle: ... You're being sarcastic right?
LTP: NO S***!