Okay, I'm back. This chapter was inspired by a video called "Welcome to Vocaloid" Episode 5 Part 2. This one scene was so hilarious that I just had to write one about the guys in SSBB. That's right, it's all about the guys this chapter! Personally, I would do the same thing to Zelda, since she's my favorite SSBB character and all.

I'm sorry I haven't been working on this fic for a while. I've been very stressed out and busy. So I'm gonna make this longer than usual. So, here's Chapter 5...

Chapter 5: Stalking Zelda

Link glared at the scene outside his dorm window. He wanted to march out of his dorm and just senselessly slug that blue-haired playboy in the fact. Did he really think he could just walk up to his Zelda and start talking to her?! "He's got a lot of nerve," Link muttered to himself.

Lately, Zelda had been spending time with Marth. At first, Link had thought of it as a meeting between royalty. But after 7 or 8 times, Link began to think that Zelda was cheating. No, Marth was hitting on her.

Outside, Zelda was laughing at a previous comment made by Marth, which turned Link's stomach and he practically started to rip his blonde hair out of his head. Marth had just explained why Ike had passed a few nights ago. At this point, Link decided to open his dorm window a bit to hear what they were saying. However, upon opening it, he would have given anything to close the window again.

"Zelda-sama, I was wondering," Marth was saying. "There's a nice, casual restaurant in town tonight. You and I could go there in private. Would you like to come with me."

"Sure, I would love to," Zelda replied. "I don't know how to explain this to Link, though..."

"Don't worry. Link will understand eventually." Marth bowed his head and turns around. While walking away, Marth happened to make eye contact with Link, whom the former casually waved to. Afterwards, Marth walked away, unaware that Link promptly flipped him off when he wasn't looking.

Later that evening...

Ike, Snake, Pit and Roy sat down on the floor while Link sat on his own bed. All 5 of them were dressed in suits accompanied with sunglasses. It should be noted that Pit had wrapped his wings in gauze so that they wouldn't be visible.

"Men," Link told them in a deep voice. "We have a cheating woman in our mist,"

"Wait a minute," Roy said. "Why are we doing this? This is so cliché.

"Roy, just shut up and sit down!" Link shouted at him. "Great, now you just killed the moment! Okay, Zelda is cheating on me. And who is she secretly seeing? MARTH!

There was a sudden gasp throughout the room.

"My reaction exactly," Link said. "So here's what we do. I managed to get the restaurant name from Peach. It's called 'La Tarde'."

"La Tarde?" Snake said. "You mean 'The Evening', right?"

"Yes, that's what it means in English. Anyways, we have to find out what Zelda and Marth are up to. I have an idea that just might work."

"RIGHT!"

"In other words," Link said, putting on his sunglasses and in a deep voice, he said, "We become men tonight."

"Again, that's really cliché."

"ROY, SHUT UP!"

At the restaurant...

Marth and Zelda sat down on a table, laughing. The two of them had already ordered whiskey for their drink and decided not to have appetizers. Little did they know that Link and the others were sitting at another table not to far from them.

When the waitress finally came to drop off Marth and Zelda's drinks, Link just sat and glared.

"So, Marth ordered Zelda whiskey so he could get her high, huh?" Link said. "He's got some nerve."

"That could've been a coincidence, Link," Ike said. "Whiskey is Zelda's favorite drink. You know that more than anybody."

"And how do you know that, mecenary? Has Zelda been seeing you, too?"

"No, of course not!"

"Well, you sure were implying that!"

"Hey! Break it up!" Roy pointed to a woman approaching their table. "Our waitress is coming!"

"Hello, welcome to La Tarde. My name is Fumiko," the waitress said when she arrived. "What would you gentlemen like to drink?"

"We're not really here to eat, thank you," Link told her. When Ike gave Link a hard prod on the shoulder, Link said, "Never mind. We'll have a beer, all five of us."

"Yes, sir," Fumiko replied. "Coming right up."

After Fumiko left, Link and the others continued to watch Marth and Zelda. Nothing unusual was happening between the prince and the princess. And while that was good on Link's part, Roy, Pit, Snake and Ike were getting annoyed. Especially Ike, who kept glaring at Link even when Fumiko dropped off their drinks.

"Okay, Ike. You've been glaring at me for 5 minutes now," Link said. "What's up?"

"You dragged us out here so we could spy on Marth and Zelda and nothing is happening between the two of them," Ike said. "This is hardly worth my time anymore." Ike got up and started to head for the exit.

"Ike!" Link grabbed the stocky, blue-haired mercenary by the shoulders and tried to pull him back towards the table. "What is something really happens between Marth and Zelda?"

"Then, it's your problem! If she hooks up with Marth tonight, I'm sorry. It's about time you started thinking about one of those celebrity power-couple names for the two of them. I already have one in mind: Malda."

Link stared at Ike in bewilderment. "What? Malda? Seriously?"

Suddenly, Pit, Roy and Snake rushed towards Link and Ike. From the looks of their faces, something big was happening.

"Link, look! Look over there!"

"Marth's gonna do something! Seriously!"

"Link, you have to see this!"

And sure enough, when Link turned that direction, they were right. Marth was standing up and Zelda was watching in awe. In fact, the whole restaurant look their way and everything fell silent.

"Zelda-sama, I've wanted to tell you something for an extremely long time now," Marth was telling Zelda.

Zelda's eyes filled with tears. "Marth..."

"Zelda-sama, I..."

"HEY! GET AWAY FROM MY WOMAN!"

Marth suddenly felt the impact of a beer mug, with the beer itself still inside the mug, crashing against the side of his face, causing a gasp among everyone else in the restaurant. The impact send Marth to the floor and Zelda ran to his aid. Meanwhile, Ike, Snake, Pit and Roy hid under their table, almost bursting with laughter.

"Marth, are you okay?" Zelda asked him. When Link approached the two of them, Zelda gave him a cold stare. "What is wrong with you?"

"Me? What's wrong with you? You were freaking cheating on me!" Link yelled at her.

"What!? You thought I was cheating?! Why would I do that?!"

"Because I saw how you were this afternoon around Marth! He was making you giggle and all and he asked you out here!"

"He didn't ask me out. He invited me here because this restaurant was new."

Link's eyes widened. "Oh..."

Zelda suddenly wrapped her arms around Link. "I'm sorry if you thought I was cheating. I didn't mean for you to think that."

Link hugged her back. "No, I'm sorry. I admit I overeacted."

Within the restaurant, "Awww..." could be heard.

After a few moments of being in each other's arms, Link and Zelda pulled away and stared in each other's eyes, smiling at each other. Then, the two of them leaned in for a kiss, when...

"LINK! Are we going to pay for these drinks or not?! Because I don't mind if we do a dine and dash. So are we gonna pay or not?!"

Link turned away from Zelda and glared at the only person he knew that was an expert at killing the mood with an ax.

"ROY! GET OVER HERE, YOU IDIOT!

In the end, it's safe to assume that Roy, Link, Ike, Zelda, Snake, Pit and Marth (as soon as he came to) had to pull a dine and dash that night.

A/N: Roy?! Why did you have to kill the mood. They're in love! Seriously!

Yay! Dine and Dash! I want to try it, but I don't want to get arrested, either...

By the way, this is the final chapter of SSBB Shorts. I'm sorry to say this, but I want to get to work on other fics, too. Oh, and be sure to check out SSBB: Malk, too. I'm sure you'll enjoy that one. Well, thanks for reading SSBB Shorts.

-EgoistFan85