Arkarian.
We're having a party! It's not often that celebrations occur in the Guard, but the Tribunal have organised this one. I think it's just a way for everyone to relieve some tension; we're still all working hard. Keziah has been defeated, which is a load off everyone's mind. Stephen had his Initiation today, too, so in part it's his celebration as well.
I sip my wine as I glance over the courtyard. We're in Athens, and there are tables piled high with food lining the area. Everyone is gathered in the middle, talking and drinking. I'm stood alone, by the wall. I can see Isabel, chatting animatedly with Ethan, and I frown. She's been acting strange for the past couple of weeks – I can't put my finger on it. She's had a short fuse where I'm concerned, snapping at me a few times since that day where we spoke about starting a family. I'm worried that she's keeping something from me, but I have no idea what. We're usually very good at talking things out, but whatever this issue is, she is guarding it well from me.
"Isabel looks great, doesn't she?" A voice cuts me out of my thoughts, and I turn to see Matt stood next to me, leaning his back against the wall.
"Yes, she does. Can I share something with you, Matt? It's a bit private, but I'm at a loss and could do with some insight..." He nods so I continue. "Isabel has been acting really strange the past couple of weeks. She won't talk to me about what is bothering her. We had a conversation about starting a family, which we have discussed before but agreed that it wasn't time."
Matt looks a little bit shocked at the prospect of his sister starting a family, but then he relaxes. "Have you talked to her about it?"
"I've tried," I say, looking over at him. "But she just changes the subject or says that she's fine. I thought maybe I'd just upset her with what I said. It's not that I don't want a family, I do. But I guess I'm just a bit worried – I never had a father when I was growing up, after all." I sigh,looking down into my glass. "How on earth will I know how to be a good one?"
Matt chuckles, then and puts his hand on my shoulder briefly. "Arkarian, you are going to be the best father when that time comes. Look at the way you nurtured all of us. Don't worry about that. And as for Isabel.." He looks over at her. "Maybe I'll see if she'll talk to me. I'll try and find out if there's something going on."
"Thanks, Matt. I appreciate it."
Isabel.
Ethan and I have been chatting for a while, sharing some memories that have had me giggling away. It's a light-hearted celebration, although I've had to turn down about a hundred glasses of wine. Everyone keeps seeing me without and assuming I need a top up.
I still haven't told anyone. I look over a find my husband, immediately feeling shameful. I just don't know how to bring it up. He's given me plenty of opportunities, asking how I am and if there is anything wrong, but I just can't seem to find the words. The seed of thought that he does not want a family with me has taken a deep hold, and I'm worried that he won't be as happy as I am.
"Hey, sis." Matt has wandered over. He was chatting with Arkarian for a little while, I saw. Ethan and Matt clap each other on the shoulders briefly and then Ethan moves on to talk to Dillon and his new Initiate, Stephen. "You alright?"
I smile at him and nod. "Yeah. I'm fine." He raises an eyebrow at me and I get the feeling that he is probing. "Really. I'm all good."
"Right." He's still watching me. "Your husband doesn't seem to think so."
I bite my lip, and to my horror can feel tears welling up. Jeez, these hormones are annoying. I pull Matt away from the groups of people so we are standing alone.
"I don't really know how to say this Matt, but..." I pause, looking up at him, and take a deep breath. "I'm pregnant. You're the first person I've told. I just don't know how tell tell Arkarian. I tried to bring it up, but he just said something about not wanting a family now and I don't know what to do..." I sniff, but feel a little bit of tension leave me as Matt envelops me in a huge hug.
"Isa, you're an idiot." He starts, grinning at me. "As is he. Think back to that conversation – did you say anything that would make him think it wasn't just you planning the future?" I slowly shake my head. "Exactly. He will be overjoyed, Isabel. Honestly. Just tell him."
I tear myself away and my eyes search the crowd for Arkarian. Our eyes meet across the courtyard and I walk over to him, feeling like my legs are made of lead. As I reach him, he pulls me into his arms in a warm embrace. I pull away slightly so I can meet his eyes. "Arkarian, I have something I need to tell you. I'm sorry I haven't before now, I just didn't really know what to say or how you would react," I'm babbling away, my nerves showing through. I decide the best course of action is just to comeright out with it. "I'm pregnant."
His eyes widen and he reacts immediately, pulling me back into his arms and lifting me off the floor! "Oh, Isabel! We're going to have a baby! That's wonderful!" How could I ever doubt that this man would react anything short of glee? He spins me around, and then stops to lay his hands on my still flat stomach. I put my arms around his neck and stretch up to press a kiss to his lips. "I'm sorry I've been acting weird. I just didn't know how to tell you."
His eyes soften and he kisses me back, his hands still across my stomach. "I'm sorry, too. I should have known there was something up when you spoke about starting a family. I should have taken the hint." Suddenly he's grinning and showering kisses all over my face. "A baby!" He is totally elated I can tell, and I can feel my spirits rising with him. We are going to be parents!
Just then, Matt taps his glass and starts a speech. Something rambling about the work of the Guard, how he is proud of us all, etcetera. At the end, he pauses and raises his glass. "There are also some congratulations in order. Stephen, our new Initiate – welcome to the Guard." Stephen gives out a great cheer, making everyone smile. His happiness is infectious. "And also to my sister, Isabel, and Arkarian," Lots of people turn and look at us, curious. "Who are going to have a baby."
Everyone erupts into cheers, and Arkarian and I are both grinning widely as everyone comes over to congratulate us, clapping Arkarian on his shoulders and taking my hands. Lady Arabella is particularly gentle, taking my hands and looking at me under her frosted eyelashes. "This is wonderful news, Isabel. Congratulations." I thank her and the congratulations keep coming – Ethan, Dillon, Shaun and Jimmy all give me big hugs. I look up at my husband and meet his eyes, and I see them brimming with love, not just for me but for our baby too. He will be a wonderful father, I already know it.