"Hey boys," my mom said as Dak, James, and I made our way through the front door.
"Hey," we replied before heading upstairs to my bedroom to discuss today's events in private. I love my mother, but she has no idea about the other side of me. The side that physically and mentally hurts other people for his own amusement.
"Jett and Carlos are feisty, aren't they?" Dak asked as he and James took a seat next to me on my bed.
"They need to learn who is in charge," James said.
"It's fine. They are just looking out for Kendall," Dak stated looking at James.
"But we could start losing creditability if we let them continue to get away with it," James said. I could tell he was scared of us losing our power. I know what he was afraid of. Back when we were six, Dak and James were bullied by the larger kids. One day I got tired of seeing Ozzy Grover mess with them. I knew what it was like to get hit and it was not a good feeling, so I took care of him. From that day forward, the three of us became inseparable. James, Dak, and my mom are the only three people in this world I care about. I learned long ago not to trust people.
I wasn't always the cold, brutal bullying I am today. There was a time when I cared about other people and wouldn't hurt a fly. But that part of me died a little more with every beating my father gave me. It was always the same. I had to spend every weekend with him after he divorced my mom. He always said I reminded him of her, so he would hit me to take his anger at her out on me. This went on for three years. I never told my mom because I was afraid of what he might to do her. One day when I was twelve I decided I couldn't take the abuse anymore, and the part of me that cared about other people died. That is how I became the person I am today. One of the first things I did as the new Logan was gather the courage to call the police on my father. Before I had been too terrified to tell anyone what I had been through.
Luke Mitchell is now rotting in a jail cell, and I couldn't be happier.
"James, don't worry. No one is going to mess with you or Dak as long as I am around," I said, patting James on his shoulder.
"Now regarding Jett and Carlos – they love Kendork the way I love you guys, so they are always going to protect him. And that's fine because they can't be around him all the time, so we will continue Kendall's torture when they aren't around to butt in." My friends nodded as I finished my statement. I honestly don't know why I enjoy hurting Kendall so much. Maybe I am just a monster like my father was. Someone who gets sick joy out of causing pain and suffering to those weaker than me.
"Logan, do you ever feel bad for what we do to Kendall?" James asked. James has always hated hurting others. He really is a good person, and so is Dak, but their fear of being bullied again prevents them from doing anything. I hate how afraid and insecure they are.
"No," I replied truthfully.
"You, Dak, and my mother are the only people I would ever feel bad about hurting. Everyone else can jump into moving traffic for all I care," I said, shrugging my shoulders. I just couldn't see myself ever loving anyone but the three members of my family after what I went through, and I only trusted them because I knew they would never hurt me. I heard a knock on my door followed by my mother entering my room.
"You boys staying for dinner?" My mom viewed Dak and James as her other sons and always made a point to include them since both their parents were always busy working.
"My dad said it was fine as long as you were ok with it," Dak said smiling at my mom.
"My mom has to work late tonight, so she is fine with it." James said. The three of us stood up and headed down stairs for dinner.
After we ate dinner and helped my mom with the dishes, we went up to my room to play some video games. I enjoyed being at home. Here I could be me. I didn't have to be the cold, cruel, unfeeling asshole. It gets tiring sometimes, but I have to do it. It helps keep other people out, which keeps me from getting hurt in the end.
"How are things with Lucy?" I asked Dak as I knocked James character into a tree. Lucy and Dak had been dating for a year now and they were pretty close.
"Things are great. She is just so amazing," Dak stated.
"When do you think you will ever start dating someone longer than a week, Logie?" James teased as he smashed my character into the wall.
"The day after hell freezes over," I answered. The longer you were around someone, the closer you got, and the closer you the get, the greater the chance of you getting hurt in the end. Which is why I am a fan of one night stands. I get my pleasure and I get to avoid the inevitable pain you feel when you let someone else into your heart.
"You don't mean that," Dak said pausing the game.
"Yeah I do. I mean, why let someone else in just so he can hurt me later on?" I said, shrugging my shoulders.
"Because everyone has that one special person they are meant to be with," James said glancing at me. I could tell he was about to go all "love is one of the greatest things in the world" on me.
"What makes you think that?" I asked. I decided to humor him since he loves this stuff.
"Because love is one of the most amazing things on Earth," James answered. I rolled my eyes. I knew that was coming.
"Don't you want to find the other half of your heart?" Dak added in.
"I don't have one of those," I replied
"Yes you do, Logan. You just refuse to show it to anyone but us and your mom," James said giving me a smile.
"Yeah right," I mumbled.
"James is right, Logan. We have known you for a long time. We know you're not a horrible person and that what your dad did was hard on you," Dak sighed.
"You can't hide who you are from us, Logie." James stated. Damn them… I thought. I hated that they knew me so well. It has always been impossible for me to keep things from those two.
"Assholes," I said giving them both the finger.
"You love us anyway," James said.
"I do. No clue why though," I groaned.
"Because we are awesome," Dak remarked. It was then I noticed the game was unpaused and they were both ganging up on me.
"Fucking cheaters," I said as I scrambled for my controller.
"Every man for himself!" James exclaimed before finishing my character off.