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The small table was lined with pairs of plates and glasses, both empty as they waited for the product of Marlene's efforts at the stove. The sky was again a bright gray and the last snow of the season was coming down hard on the city, reducing the visibility outside the window to just a few hundred yards. Marlene was finishing up a plain eggs and toast breakfast for the girls and Aiden.

She spoke over her shoulder as she couldn't afford to turn her focus away from the sensitive food. "You okay, Ellie?"

"Yeah…" The implication of the question sunk in after she answered it. "Oh, right. Yeah, I guess."

"What was it anyway?"

"I'd rather not. If that's okay."

Marlene walked over with a half-gallon of milk and poured it out into their glasses. "Of course, you don't have to. It must've been quite intense though for you to wake up like you did. I can't even imagine." She noticed Ellie averting eye contact so she dropped the subject. "The eggs will be done in a minute."

She finished up a failed omelet attempt and passed them out to the four other people in the room as scrambled eggs. "Speaking of a weird night, I heard you come in late Joel. Where have you been?"

The scruffy man was sitting in his usual spot and also as usual keeping to himself. "Went out of town."

Marlene paused expecting something more but received nothing but quiet. "Well, why'd you go out of town?"

"See an old friend I ain't seen in some time." He followed up with a noise, something like a combination of a grunt and clearing his throat.

Marlene rolled her eyes took his continuing vagueness as a sign to move on.

The three of them sat and watched TV while Ellie and Riley ate quietly in their corner of the room, neither wanting to discuss the night before with the others present. They finished and retreated back into their room before once again appearing with their heavy coats.

"We're going out for a bit."

"I don't like you girls going out and begging. It's not safe."

"We aren't today. But thanks." Riley gave a half-assed smile before ushering her and Ellie out through the door.

They threw over their hoods as they pushed through the building's entrance door. There was an apparent lack of wind, the calmness of which allowed for fog to settle and for the falling snow to float nearly straight down. They headed in no particular direction, just one with busy roads.

They walked in silence and took in the weather as much as they could before Riley brought up what Ellie knew the purpose for their walk was. "Was it the same?"

Ellie kept staring straight ahead as they walked. "Different, but the same. Yeah."

"Tell me."

"…I don't know if I really should anymore. It's probably stupid."

"Ellie. It's not stupid. Come on. And besides, you're the reason we're out here. Don't be stubborn."

"Yeah, I know. Alright. So… we were at some diner and you made me try calamari."

"Gross."

"You liked them in the dream! You don't really?" Riley shook her head. "Anyway, I saw… well thought I saw, Sam and Tino at one of the other tables. I went over there to see, and they weren't. But obviously they were."

"What does that mean?"

"Well, I thought it was them in my dream, which means my mind made me think they were. So really it was them."

"Uh."

"It was them."

"Okay."

"So we left the diner and were walking down the sidewalk when some guy ran passed me and shoved me aside. They got hit by a car and I'm pretty sure they died. We ran over to check it out, and you stole the dude's wallet."

"That's stupid. Even for me."

"Yeah, I was really pissed at you." She lost focus for a moment when she brushed away the snow that had built up on her eyelashes. "We hurried away until some guy appeared in front of us and stood completely still. We tried to back up when another appeared behind us. They wanted the wallet, so you threw it to them. Then he said 'sorry'."

"For what?"

Ellie sighed. "For what he was about to do. He nodded at the guy behind us, who then…" She shook her head in disbelief. "Fuck. Who then stabbed you. A lot. The other guy hit me on the ground and I just laid there watching you die."

"That's screwed up. Do I usually die in your dreams?"

"Yeah. Anyway, so you died again. The guy behind me pulled out a gun and cocked it. I turned around after hearing his voice. Guess."

"David."

"It's always fucking David. He shot me and the next thing I knew I was in our room screaming my lungs out."

"And scaring the hell out of me. What about you though? Do you usually die in your dreams?"

"Never. Probably why it affected me so much."

"Oh thanks."

"What?"

Riley smirked it off. "Nothing. Anything else?"

"That's it." She sighed and casually looked around when spotted a bench alongside a small grassy area with a few dead trees along it. "That's pretty. We should sit over there."

"Sit? It's cold enough walking. We'll freeze if we stop."

"You said we could talk. We're gonna talk on the bench."

"Aren't we talking now?"

"Riley, you promised me."

"Yeah, you're right. I did."

They waited at the edge of the sidewalk and watched as the beams from headlights passed by, the cars materializing as their source as they neared. As the headlights finally stopped appearing they crossed the road, brushed off the bench of snow, and sat with their arms crossed and hoods pulled tightly closed.

"Okay. I said we can talk, let's talk."

Ellie appeared distant, even a bit embarrassed. "I think they mean something… actually I know they do."

"The nightmares?"

"Yeah."

"They're just nightmares, Ellie. They don't have to mean anything."

"I know. I think they do though."

"Alright. What then?"

"Well, first off, I'm not really sure why you die in them every time. I think it just means I'm terrified of losing you."

"Aww." Riley stiffly shouldered Ellie to the side.

Ellie nudged her back, though her demeanor dropped almost instantly. "Second, and most seriously, I think it's because I… still feel guilty about what we did." She noticed Riley became uncomfortable nearly immediately from her words. "You said-"

"I know what I said. Doesn't mean I have to like it." She slowed her fidgeting and settled back to being stationary on the bench. "Okay, you feel guilty. So what?"

"I don't know, nothing really. I just want to talk it out."

Riley sighed and stared at the tree in front of them that was entirely painted white. She reluctantly nodded her head. "Fine. You want to know why I don't want to talk about it?"

"Yes! That's all I've wanted."

"Because… it's because I feel the same, alright?"

Ellie stared blankly at her. "What? Seriously?" Her voice grew more aggressive. "Is that why you always act so weird whenever I bring it up?"

"Yeah." Riley couldn't force herself to keep eye contact.

"Then why the hell couldn't you have just said so instead of getting all defensive on me? Jesus, Riley, you've made me feel really, fuck I don't know, ashamed the last few weeks because of that shit."

The quick change from casual conversation to heavy admission shocked her. "What? How?"

"Are you kidding? Because all this shit, Riley, these nightmares? They were happening to me. They terrified me almost every night and I couldn't even get my best friend to acknowledge them, like they were something to be embarrassed about. It really sucked. That's how."

"I…" Riley fumbled for words and came up empty.

"You've known that I wanted to discuss them since the very first one. Yet we couldn't because you were uncomfortable, or whatever stupid excuse."

Riley wanted to counter but knew it would've just made the situation worse. "Okay. I get it. I messed up bad."

"Yeah. You really did. Is it really that difficult for you? To talk about this kind of stuff?" She waited for an answer but received only an embarrassed look. She gave in with a sigh and continued. "You said you felt the same."

"Yeah." Riley hesitantly reentered the conversation.

"What did you mean?"

"Well, I meant that I feel guilty too." Ellie gestured for her to continue. "Because… we got out and they didn't."

"Sam and Tino."

"And fuck knows how many other orphans there."

They huddled together closely as a mild wind picked up and blew through the city. The peaceful falling snow was soon whipped into a whirlwind of dancing flakes and the fog began losing its grip and slowly dissipated as the current carried it out.

Riley picked up where she left off. "What about you? You can't ask me and then be quiet about it."

"…it's just this nagging feeling that won't leave me alone, you know? Like we should have done more. I guess."

"Like what? We did what we could. We said this before."

"I know we did. I just… I don't know. Guilt doesn't really have to be reasonable, does it?"

Riley quietly let out an emotionless chuckle. "No it doesn't." Her demeanor quickly faded. "Did you really feel ashamed?"

"Sorry I said it like that."

"But did you?"

"A bit, yeah."

"Shit, Ellie, I'm sorry. I didn't intentionally do that, I hope you know that."

"I do. I just didn't know why you were acting that way though." She reached over her shoulder and rubbed at the back of her hood. "Still don't really."

Riley sighed. "Probably owe you an explanation, huh?"

Ellie nodded her head sarcastically. "That'd be nice."

"Fine." She exhaled and settled in to a lower mood that allowed her to explain more easily. "I run… a lot. From like everything. Friends, family, homes, orphanages. Everything. Pretty sure you know that part though."

"A little. You don't talk about it much really."

"Yeah, well, there's a reason I don't. But since you want to know, it's because... I'm afraid."

Ellie eyed her with a confused look. "Of what? Staying?"

"Essentially. I've told you this before, but I've always sabotaged my foster families before they could reject me… before anything happened. Idiotic, I know."

"Okay, but what's that got to do with anything?"

"I ran, Ellie. That's what. I ran then and I ran at Gateway. I always do. I always do."

"What happened at the orphanage is a lot different than your reasons for running from your families. You can't blame yourself for that, that's stupid. And besides, you don't always run."

Riley's face showed skepticism. "What don't I run from?"

"Me..."

"That was corny."

"…not to me. Why couldn't you have just told me that back at the start of this whole thing? We tell each other everything… at least I thought we did."

"I told you, I'm not comfortable with it. Like, in the slightest. And it's not just you, I don't like telling anyone."

"I'm not just anyone though, am I?"

She was quick to counter. "No, of course not. It's just- I have my secrets, one less now, and I'm sure you have yours. It's normal. Well, at least it is for normal people."

"Couldn't resist that one, could you?"

"Nope."

Ellie rubbed both of her shoulders and shook herself, the snow falling off of her with each movement. She sat and, for a minute, took in the dance displaying itself before her.

"I don't know. I just… feel like shit, you know? It's just Sam, Tino, and David over and over again. And then there's you… that's always the worst part. If these don't stop I feel like I'm gonna go crazy or something." A puff of white escaped her as she sighed. "What about you? No dreams or anything?"

"Nope. I really don't need nightmares to remind me how I feel. My own damn head does that for me."

"Lovely. Well if you find a way to stop it then let me know. I'd love some relief."

Riley dejectedly chuckled. "Yeah me too."

Ellie looked into the sky and closed her eyes and let the snow gather on her face for just a moment before brushing it off. "We should get moving again. It actually seems to be getting colder."

"Yeah, I think I need a break from all this emotional stuff for a bit." She pushed herself off the bench, leaving behind a void of snow where the brown of the wood showed through. "That's not to say I won't listen to it. Just me personally."

"Good save." She stuck out her hands and was pulled up without thought by Riley.

"Are we good?"

"Of course."

They flashed each other a slight smile before Riley observed her surroundings. "So what now?"

"Well… I'd love to suggest we go get ourselves drunk and hopefully forget the whole thing."

"Wow, listen to you. I like the way you think."

"Joel's got a stash. I'm sure he won't mind if we replace what we drink."

"Wait, seriously?" Riley smirked in disbelief but for only a moment before dwelling on it after Ellie nodded her head in response. "Alright, yeah. Why not? Should warm us up anyway."