Chapter 2.): "Sibling-esque Conversations."
Author's Notes Beginning Chapter 2.): Yes, folks, I'm back, and with a literary (and sometimes very literal) vengeance... this story might be a bit off from what I intended initially, but here it is, and I hope you enjoy it. Please read, review/comment, and enjoy.
Oh, and this: [text] means 'telepathic speaking' or sometimes 'mental prayer' (same kind of deal), in case it comes up. That was a brilliant idea by another fanfic author- one I mean to give credit to, but that'll probably greatly upset him, so I relinquish credit for that idea 'into the aether' as it were and deny myself credit.
I know well it's weird to have someone hire their own relative(s), but this is also based on Christian and especially Catholic moral teaching about the nature of Baptism- so there will be a sibling-like bond between the main characters in this tale.
As she sat across from me, quietly munching on her "goop" as my family calls the dish, she asked me occasional questions about my past; my friendships, life, school days, and whatnot. "I had some bitter rivals in my past, in my childhood, and not a few followers- quite a bit, in fact... but to me they and myself were merely means to an end." I was saying. To be blunt, her response was rather shocked and hurt. She looked kind of sad, and sort of like she was going to cry a bit, and asked me if I saw her as that.
"Truth be told, in order to defend myself from Perdition, I'll abandon anyone who falls for their lies." I said, and she looked like I had truly broken her heart. "Sadly there's a bit of sadism in me- one thing the Church has tried to warn me about- the domestic church, that is. Well, that and the fact that I frankly LOOK like the USSR in several ways! That ought to be terrifying to consider- maybe I do need to change that detail." I thought with a grim grin on my face.
It was then that she realized a deep truth about me, something I've understood since I was at least seven years old- I am literally a "political officer" or "commissar" in regards to the War between Good and Evil- quite interesting. I could tell that from her reaction- but she seemed very interested in the fact that I am also a Modern Knight- a member of Knights of Columbus.
Her next question took me by surprise: "Would you tell me about the value of that lapel pin you wear?" she asked with a voice that was still cracking with tears- "I really had broken her heart." That realization tugged at my conscience and was beginning to bother me rather profoundly- I had to find a way to make it up to her... especially since I had somehow liked hurting her feelings- that ought to bug me far more than it did!
I began describing the value and symbolism of the "Shining Armor Award" by comparing it to the Iron Cross in Imperial Germany- as a reward for service... and it is much the same in role. "It signifies someone who's provided a service to the order, in fact, a set series of services written out on the card of application for the reward. The knight must attend a certain number of meetings, he must remain in good standing, he must attain his third degree and attend the prescribed number of meetings within the first year, and he must recruit at least one new member- but the rituals" I paused to emphasize this "are classified, I cannot go into them, and won't- not in the least. Sorry." I said in explanation. "But this" I signified by waving my hand between us "is well within the job description- so don't worry, this fits my duties completely!" I responded. Her nodding was still sad- it was clear that what I'd said had Really hurt her feelings.
It was then that I realized exactly how wrong that attitude I have was; "Virtually destroying my adopted sister's feelings- what kind of monster am I becoming?!" It sounds like I was beating myself up, but what I was trying to do is get myself to want to change and be kind.
She was about to get up, in fact she was in the process of getting up- she was really hurt and thereby angry, when I stopped her by placing my left hand gently but firmly on her right one and I asked her "Wait, OK? I want to make it right with you."
Her heart was still broken- she seemed to fear that I'd turn her over to her adversary to abuse in an instant- and that really hurt the young woman. Her response kind of shocked me "There's nothing to make up." she said, with a sad look on her face "I had thought you'd be my friend... but you're just mean."
"Darn it, this is going downhill fast!" I thought, then responded "Look, Kennedy, I'm sorry- and hey, I know I've got to be kind."
"If you know it, then why were you so mean to me just now?" she asked- clearly still hurting- she had wanted friendship, and what I'd done had frightened her, for no reason aside from it being fun. "What kind of a monster am I to do that?" I wondered.
I kind of shrugged, and said "A flaw in my personality- most likely."
As she sat down again, she responded "Yeah, I should say so!" bitterly- it seemed I had really hurt her feelings. Then she continued: "Shouldn't you have been more charitable to me, instead of frightening me for fun? I mean, isn't charity the main goal of your organization?" she asked, then continued "I mean, aren't the other goals just mere extensions of charity- and if so, how can you justify hurting your neighbor so- for kicks only?! How do you justify that?! That Hurt!" This was clearly a rebuke- and it stung, but I deserved every bit of it.
I then turned the topic around on her by asking "You sure know a lot about Knights of Columbus, how is that?"
"My Watcher, he was one- and he let slip to me about the values of the order- that's one major reason I recognized that pin you wear... he was also one of my best friends, and I loved him. Unfortunately..." her voice broke, and the next phrase I could barely make out "he was murdered by the Bringers!" it was obvious that she still loved him greatly. "I like to think he's still around, watching out for me, but who am I kidding? That's just plain silly." she said, shaking her head, sadly.
As I dabbed my face with the napkin post finishing eating and then got up, she said suddenly and right out of the blue "Please stay in this mansion, at least until you get on your feet economically- I like taking care of my neighbors." This revealed something deep and good about her, and it was a real pleasure to acquess- she was inviting me to be her house-guest for as long as it took.
The look she gave me was a begging one, and for some odd reason it melted my heart, so I consented- conditionally that she not try to lay with me in any way. I value my virginity, and won't give it up at all if I have anything to say about it. Her response was both candid and really very believable. "I'm into girls... you I love as if you were my brother. I wouldn't lay with you at all. That's why I want to take care of you- because I see you as a brother of mine... after all, when you consider my economic resources; I'm practically an American Princess- but all that wealth means nothing to me. Loving my neighbors, however, means just about everything to me!" I took some comfort in her response- the honesty and whatnot, but the fact that she's gay is somewhat uncomfortable to me; however, it does mean that she won't want me in that way, so I guess I'll take what I can get.
Later on that evening, she offered me the ability to play her video-games with her. "Sounds fun!" I said "What games have you got?" It turned out we both like first-person-shooter games, especially piloting games- involving aircraft or spacecraft in dogfights. This was promising to be a fun evening.
"I'm glad my relationship with Willow broke up; oh, I love her still- and will always, but it wasn't a good one for me at all!" she said, right out of the blue before continuing with "I was very upset when she dumped me- in fact, I literally accused my role-model of "super-literally effing everything up", and actually cursed at her a bit while crying; then I said "You still don't get it, Genius, Willow dumped me!" I was upset" she paused, then continued with "I guess you could pretty much call me either a "Secular Catholic" or a "Cultural Catholic" or, ironically, an "Atheistic Catholic", I guess you'd say I'm a runaway..." she said with a grim grin as she piloted her craft through the asteroid field in the video-game we're playing "I don't really believe that I believe in anything- but I want to adhere to the value of loving one's neighbor."
This confirmed something I had suspected in her- almost upon meeting her, actually two different things: one: people like her are basically "prodigal children" of one sort (those who are sexually active outside of marriage), and two: she's basically a CINO: Catholic in name only- that is not likely to be a compliment! But she also loves easily, and has real trouble with purity.
Indeed, we're much the opposite: she would die for those who she considers her friends, and has trouble with chastity... I myself would willingly and happily hand over just about anyone who crosses moral law to Perdition in a heartbeat! Then from that I realized something else, just like with a complex algebra problem: somebody's protecting me by inducing me to love her as if she was my adopted sister- and by making us siblings in His design- my Mentor, the Holy Spirit is the one who induced this in me!
"I know this may upset you, but anybody who even takes a lover is a criminal in my eyes." I responded.
Her response was equally candid, and equally out of the blue "That'd include most of humanity, you do realize? But hey, if you want to be basically a dictator, who am I to get in your way- oh, wait,,, that's kind of my duty!" she said, and I had the inkling that she was both messing with me and actually standing up to me.
"You remind me of a classmate of mine from my youth, a girl I remember well, and the only one I'd consider as trustworthy enough to entrust myself to- but it has to be consensual... she was the only one to stand up to me then, during my first real attempt at persecution of others- and for that I owe her a massive debt. One that I'm only too happy to reply ASAP." I said, kind of chuckling up with friendly laughter- thereby revealing something about myself- iff you want to endear yourself to me: confront me when I'm in the wrong, then stick the course out- and if you can turn me around, or if one of your colleagues does so, you'll have me loyal to you pretty much forever!
"You do know I can't bring myself to date or marry guys- no matter how much I may love them." she responded.
But it was getting late, and tomorrow's another big day.
Author's Notes End Chapter 2.): I had intended to have the narrator be the hero of this piece, but if a hero he is: he's a PROFOUNDLY messed up one- he's got some Serious issues, and is Extremely flawed! Make no mistake: this guy's got his problems, and some of them are extremely serious (like a taste for emotional sadism)- especially in attitude towards others.
In each of my fanfiction stories: I am advocating for or against one or more immoral behaviors- well, this one hit the jackpot in regards to advocating for morality- it appears to be a True Masterpiece! I hope this is as enjoyable to you as it is to me- especially the success of dealing with so many 'personality glitches' and I sincerely hope this enlightens some if not all who read it to the reality of what's right and what's wrong- in reality, not merely in terms of personal viewpoints!
Please tell me if I got anything wrong about any of the overall views of anyone who shares the views of the characters in approach- I wanted to convey a sibling-like bond. And well do I know that it's weird to hire relatives (even by adoption) which, if you include baptism in that category, can be confusing- and that's the nature of the bond. I am comparing baptism to adoption- something that was always very hard for me to accept in my childhood... with the intent of showing that, yes, I do have my flaws. But I am the kind of man to not let them exist without correcting them!
Any further explanations will be in later chapters as needed, or in PMs. Please Enjoy!