Apprentice and Pregnant 2
Chapter 19: A Fathers Love
I know we're stuck inside a dead end countdown,
With no communication, straight down
We're drowning in our desperation
We're lost beneath the surface
Give me some time, give me some reason
Make up your mind, cool down the fever
Drama must die, so give me some way
To salvage this life, finally it's over
Laurelpaw ran as fast as she could, but it felt like she was going backwards. Her paws felt like they were sinking in quicksand, drowning her. Her lungs were bursting but she didn't stop. She felt thorns and sharp rocks stab into her paws, but it didn't slow her down. It was almost an out of body experience, as if Laurelpaw was up in Starclan watching the scene from above. Laurelpaw wondered if Starclan really was watching them, up in the dark sky.
Please don't let Firepaw be dead, Laurelpaw prayed desperately. I'd face Old Gray a thousand times over if it meant Firepaw could be alive… please… if you let Old Gray kill him
Then it will kill me too
If Starclan was listening, they didn't show it. Laurelpaw fought back tears and pressed on, feeling as though she was going to fall over from the effort. She could see the Shadowclan border coming up in the distance, and she was terrified of what she would find.
And then she saw him.
Old Gray came into view, his huge figure moving quickly as he fought with someone. The screaming coming from them was nearly unbearable; the vicious snarling would haunt Laurelpaw for moons. Swallow Star suddenly gave an alarm, stopping in his tracks and howling loudly. This startled Old Gray, and he looked up in alarm. Laurelpaw felt sick as the cat he was fighting fell to the ground, blood splattered across his fur like he was hit by a wave of water in the ocean.
It was Cracklepaw.
Swallow Star then leaped, yowling furiously as he made his way to Old Gray with his claws extended. The warriors followed, screaming angrily as they backed up their leader. Old Gray got up at once, knowing he was trapped. He tried to scrabble up the hill behind him to get away.
He didn't even get halfway up it before Swallow Star bowled him over, smashing his face into the dirt with his paws. Laurelpaw watched, not knowing what to do. Tigerstripe and Snowsong were tending to Cracklepaw, pressing their paws against open wounds to try and stop the blood.
"Pinepaw!" Tigerstripe called over to where Pinepaw was standing, looking terrified. "Go get Featherwing!"
Pinepaw nodded and streaked away, bounding down the path they had come. Laurelpaw looked around the clearing, heart thudding in her chest. She could see Silverpaw limping towards her mother, Hollyshine. He was crying and shaking, blood crusted over his body like a cast. In the scene beyond, she was dimly aware of Swallow Star leaning down, delivering the killing bite to Old Grays neck. He convulsed and spat blood at the leader before falling dead, living as of no more. Laurelpaw watched, waiting for the relief to wash over her. She waited for peace to calm her down; the cat that had terrorized her was finally dead.
But peace did not come.
She couldn't stop staring at Old Gray, as his lifeless head slumped to the side. His eyes were still open, and he seemed to stare at Laurelpaw as if he was still alive. Dead eyes stared into hers, cold and yellow. Laurelpaw shuddered and looked away as Swallow Star used a paw to shut them forever.
She sat on the cold ground, shaking violently. She didn't know where Firepaw was, and she wasn't sure if she wanted to know anymore. He's dead, she thought miserably. I know he's dead… why else would Snowsong insist I stay behind?
It feels like my heart is shattering into a zillion pieces
"Laurelpaw," Grayclaws low voice whispered beside her. "Laurelpaw, he's gone. Old Gray will never hurt you again."
Laurelpaw looked over at her father with dull eyes, tears clouding her vision. She couldn't talk, so she just stared at him. Grayclaw seemed to know what she was thinking, and he pressed against her in an attempt to comfort her. Laurelpaw gritted her teeth, feeling as though she was the one who had died, not Old Gray.
"Baby," Grayclaw said, turning his face to look at her eyes. "He's not dead."
"What?" Laurelpaws voice cracked and she looked up at him in alarm, eyes wide. The sudden movement from her eyelids made all the tears stream down her face, and she wiped them away quickly in embarrassment.
"Firepaw is alive," Grayclaw said in a gentle voice. "But he isn't doing very well. He's coughing up blood, and I'm no medicine cat but it's not hard to tell there's blood in his lungs."
"Where is he?" Laurelpaw demanded, spinning her head around quickly. "I don't see him!"
"About that," Grayclaw said with a painful expression in his eyes. "I don't think its best you see him right now, Laurelpaw. He can't talk and there's blood all over him and-"
"What would you do if it were Hollyshine?" Laurelpaw cut him off angrily. "What did you do when you found out Longtail had her trapped in the forest, huh? Did you just leave her?"
"No," Grayclaw said after a long pause. He stared at Laurelpaw, his one good eye sad. His blind eye remained gray and cloudy, forever blind to the rest of the world.
"What did you do," Laurelpaw whispered, curiosity suddenly making her wonder about that horrible time. "When you found out my mom was in trouble?"
"I went looking for her," Grayclaw said gently. "Because I love her. It's my job to protect her, and to protect you and your brothers."
"Who killed Longtail?" Laurelpaw asked, realizing that no one had ever explained the story to her. "Was it Fallenstar?"
"No," Grayclaw said, turning away. "It was Dark Lake."
"Oh," Laurelpaw said. She looked at Grayclaw, wondering why he had turned away suddenly. He stared at the ground angrily.
"What's wrong?" Laurelpaw asked, worried. "Dad?"
"Dark Lake killed him," Grayclaw whispered, not looking up at her. "But it should have been me."
"You lost your eyesight," Laurelpaw crowed. "Don't go beating yourself up about it!"
"It bothered me for a long time," Grayclaw confessed after a few moments. "And no one understood when they found out that Firepaw had attacked Old Gray. They all thought he was an idiot, making suicidal decisions without thinking them through."
Laurelpaw wasn't sure how this was relevant, so she sat and waited for him to continue.
"I understood why he did it," Grayclaw said quietly, voice cracking as if he were going to start crying. Laurelpaw held her breath in sharply, hoping that he didn't actually start crying. If he cries, I'm going to cry. And then we'll never get through this.
"He loves you, Laurelpaw," Grayclaw said, clearing his throat. "So don't be angry with him for nearly killing himself. He did it to try and protect you, just like I had tried to protect your mother."
"I'm not mad," Laurelpaw whispered. "Where is Hollyshine, anyway?"
"Helping out your brothers," Grayclaw nodded to where Hollyshine was huddled next to her wounded sons.
"You know something, though?" Grayclaw said at last. He moved a bit closer to Laurelpaw, resting his head on hers. "I hate Longtail, and I will forever. But he did give me one thing."
"What?" Laurelpaw asked in confusion, wondering what good could have possibly came out of Longtail.
"You," Grayclaw said gently.
This made Laurelpaw choke up so bad she couldn't speak. She looked away, struggling not to lose it.
"Now enough talking for now," Grayclaw said, standing up. "Let's go see Firepaw."