I don't own anything.

Nothing but Trouble

Chapter Seventeen:

"So, you finally saw it, huh?" Tsunade glared at the pink haired woman sitting across from her. She didn't like the younger woman's tone, but she did have a point.

"Yeah, I saw it," Tsunade admitted. "I can understand him killing people, it is a necessity for a Kage, but I can't understand the bloodlust I saw in his eyes. That's not the Naruto I know. What do you think happened?"

"It has to be something with the fox," Sakura stated. Tsunade felt her stomach drop.

"He mentioned an offer."

"An offer from the fox?" Sakura asked. Tsunade nodded.

"He also implied that he accepted," she added. "Has he mentioned anything like that to you?"

"No," Sakura admitted.

"Mentioned what?" Tsunade jerked upwards again, but managed to avoid falling on her ass again.

"Naruto!"

"Yo," the blond replied from where he was perched on her windowsill with Anko next to him. "What do you know about Root?"

"Root?" Tsunade asked. There was something familiar about that word. "Like plants?"

"Like ninja," Naruto corrected. Tsunade frowned as she considered the word.

"Wasn't that an ANBU black ops training program or something?"

"Bingo." Tsunade frowned again as she came to a realization.

"It's a black ops program that you should know nothing about," she added before turning her gaze on Anko. To her surprise, the purple haired woman giggled and latched onto Naruto's arm. "What's wrong with her?"

"I think I might have short-circuited something upstairs," Naruto admitted. "Now, can you tell me what happened to Root?" Tsunade cast one more pointed glare at the giggling kunoichi before turning back to the blond.

"They were disbanded and the members were reintroduced to the ANBU," Tsunade stated. "Where are you going with this Naruto?"

"Who was in charge of Root and why were they disbanded?" Naruto pressed.

"Is there a point to this, or are you trying to get classified information out of me?" Tsunade asked. Naruto just grinned. "Damn it." Tsunade walked over to one of the walls of her office and performed a few seals. The genjutsu dropped to reveal a series of cubby holes filled with scrolls. "Just incase anybody wants to try anything stupid, if anyone but me grabs one of these things, they die." She selected one and made her way back to her desk. "This had better be important Naruto."

"I think it is," the blond stated. Tsunade sighed and opened the scroll. She buzzed through it quickly, her brow furrowing more with every word she read.

"Danzo."

"Good, now why was it disbanded?" Naruto asked. Tsunade kept reading.

"Old Man Sarutobi heard one too many rumors that Danzo was using Root to run his own operations," she stated.

"Guess how many of the ninja who tried to stop me were once part of Root," Naruto stated.

"God damn it," Tsunade growled. Danzo had been a major pain in the ass before, but now he was a very real threat.

"Now, what are you going to do about it?" Naruto asked. Tsunade sank back into her chair and reached into her desk for the bottle of vodka Naruto had given her.

"Nothing," she admitted.

"Explain now."

"I can't afford a civil war right now," Tsunade stated. "This village cannot appear in any way weakened while so many VIPs are in attendance. Danzo knows this too, so he won't try anything."

"Anything other than trying to kidnap me, you mean," Naruto growled. Tsunade smirked at that.

"I get the feeling he wouldn't be able to," she commented.

"That's not the point," Naruto complained, trying to hide a smirk of his own. "I'd recommend you order your ANBU to stay far away from me."

"Of course," Tsunade replied. "All those loyal to me won't bother you."

"And what am I allowed to do to the ones that do bother me?" Naruto pressed.

"Would it matter if I told you what I wanted you to do?" Tsunade asked.

"I'd take it under consideration."

(:ii:)

"So, what were you two talking about?"

"Village affairs," Sakura lied as she strolled along beside her former teammate.

"You two were kind of worked up," Naruto commented. Anko let out another giggle and walked on her toes to nuzzle the blonde's neck.

"What did you do to her?" Sakura demanded. She had never seen the ANBU interrogator in such a state.

"Well, I was kind of in a hurry and I might have knocked something loose," Naruto answered. "She'll be fine. . .probably. Now, what were you really talking about?" Sakura masked her thinking by studying Anko.

"In a hurry doing what?"

"You'd probably hit me if I told you the details."

"Probably," she admitted finally, "anyway, I was talking about my team. Are you sure she'll be fine?"

"Eighty-percent sure," Naruto stated. "Now what's wrong with your team?"

"Do you care?" Sakura sniped.

"Why are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad!" Okay, maybe a little. "I'm just stressed, okay?"

"About what?"

"My team," Sakura stated. "Look, I'm worried about Kaori."

"What's wrong with her?"

"I'm worried that she's holding the team back," Sakura admitted. She hadn't intended to bring this up, but now she couldn't stop herself. "I held the whole team back last time, mostly because of her."

"Oh, yeah, the Chunin Exams. I forgot about that."

"You forgot?" Sakura deadpanned, somehow not surprised.

"Yeah. Yasu!" Sakura jumped and spun to face the man Naruto had just yelled at. "Go find out if the genin teams are in the village."

"Go. . .find. . .out. . .I just got here!" the harried-looking man snapped. "I've been lost in the woods for a week!"

"You got lost?" Naruto repeated. "Oh, that's clever."

"It's not my fault!" Yasu roared. "That bitch knocked me out!" Naruto turned and glanced at Sakura with a raised eyebrow.

"I didn't do anything," she stated.

"Not that bitch!" Yasu bellowed. "Rumiko!"

"What did you do?" Naruto asked.

"Nothing." The blond sighed in annoyance.

"Go find my genin teams," Naruto ordered. Yasu's jaw dropped to argue, but Naruto just pointed. After a moment, the other man sighed and leapt up onto a nearby building. "Well, that takes care of that, now what's wrong with Kaori?"

"She's holding back the team," Sakura stated flatly. "I keep trying to train her, but she isn't making it easy."

"I could give it a shot," Naruto offered.

"You?" Sakura asked, an eyebrow rising.

"Sure!" Naruto stated enthusiastically. "I've played sensei to a few of the people in my village and it usually turned out pretty good. Well, more good than bad, anyway."

"Like that kid whose hand you almost removed?"

"Shogo? That's nothing. He was being really annoying."

"You obviously haven't gotten to know Kaori yet," Sakura stated. She took a deep breath. "If I give her to you, you'll return her in one piece, right?"

"Absolutely," Naruto stated. Sakura studied him carefully.

"I mean, with all those pieces still attached." The blond flinched slightly. "And please, don't sleep with her."

"Isn't she a little young?"

"Oh, sorry. I didn't know you had standards."

"That was a cheap shot." Anko interrupted them by leaning up to nibble on his ear.

"You were saying?" Sakura asked.

"I said that it was a cheap shot, I didn't say it was unfounded."

"Yeah, we'll talk tomorrow," Sakura stated. "Good night Naruto." The blond glanced up and found himself in front of an apartment building.

"Your place?"

"Room three-oh-two," Sakura confirmed.

"Good night." Naruto watched her disappear up the stairs and growled in annoyance as Anko's grip on his arm tightened. "Okay, enough of that." Naruto slapped the woman hard enough to land her on her ass.

"Ow!"

"Feeling better?"

"No!" Anko snapped. "That hurt. . .and not in a good way." She glanced around and frowned. "Where are we?"

"Sakura's apartment," Naruto stated.

"Haruno?" Anko wondered. "How'd we get here?"

"We walked," Naruto stated. The purple haired woman stared at him in disbelief.

"I don't remember any of that."

"I can have that effect sometimes," Naruto stated. "Come on, time to go home."

(:ii:)

"So we walked all the way to the Hokage's office and then to Haruno's place?" Anko asked.

"Yeah," Naruto replied as he fished out the keys to his apartment. "You were pretty out of it.

"You are seriously, never getting rid of me," Anko stated. "Why are you making that face?" Naruto pointed to where his door was cracked open. "I'm guessing we didn't leave the door open?"

"No. We left through the window," Naruto stated as he studied his door. "If this is an ambush, I am severely disappointed."

"Well there's only one thing to do!" Anko announced. She promptly kicked the door all the way open and strolled in. "We're home!"

"That's actually exactly what I was about to do," Naruto admitted as he followed her in. He paused as he took in the redhead reclining on his couch.

"Did you get us a hooker?" Anko asked. Naruto sighed and walked to the kitchen to get himself a drink.

"That's the Mizukage," he called. "Who wants a drink?"

"I'll take one after I get my foot out of my mouth," Anko replied.

"I've heard good things about your country's local drink," the Mizukage added. Naruto nodded to himself and poured three tall glasses of vodka before drinking one, refilling it, and making his way to where the others were. "Drinks all around."

"Thank you," the Mizukage replied as she took her drink. Naruto nodded and squeezed in next to Anko on the love seat. He just knew this wasn't what he wanted it to be.

"This is about Kisame, right?"

"I was kind of hoping for a threesome," Anko stated.

"Your foot's in your mouth again," Naruto commented before turning back to the Mizukage. "This is about Kisame, right?"

"Yes," the redhead replied, "although I don't see why we can't use this opportunity to become more familiar."

"Look, Lady Mizukage. . ."

"Mei," the woman interrupted.

"Alright, Mei," Naruto allowed, "the big blue fruit loop is one of mine now. We don't have many rules in my village, but one of them is: no one betrays anyone."

"That is most unfortunate," Mei stated as she sipped her drink and smiled. "Are you sure there isn't anything I can do to convince you otherwise?"

"I'm sure."

"I see." Mei finished her drink and rose to her feet. "I respect that more than you can understand. I hope your faith isn't misplaced." Naruto and Anko both watched her walk out.

"Damn, you just got cock blocked," the purple haired woman stated.

"I know," Naruto replied. "Kisame, get in here!"

(:ii:)

Kisame sighed as his boss called for him. This wasn't going to be good. "I'm here." He dropped down onto the balcony and strolled in as casually as he could. "Hey boss." The punch that connected with Kisame's jaw damn near dropped him.

"I just missed out on some world class T&A because of you," the blond growled. "Give me one reason I shouldn't kill you."

"You were defending your principles?" Kisame ventured. The glare he got told him that principles weren't a good enough reason. "I've got good news?"

"Shoot."

"They're on the move," Kisame stated, casting a glance at the purple haired woman beside his boss. Naruto apparently didn't get it.

"Who?" The blue-skinned man sighed in annoyance.

"Them," he stated. Naruto's eyes shot open.

"Oh!"

"Yeah, oh," Kisame confirmed.

"Oh?" Anko ventured.

"What? No," Naruto stated.

"No oh?" Anko asked.

"No oh," Naruto confirmed.

"Just tell me," Anko ordered.

"Akatsuki," Naruto stated. The purple-haired woman straightened like she had been struck by lightning. "They're on the move."

"You know. . ." Anko started.

"I do," Naruto interrupted. "Orochimaru's dead, Anko."

"I'll believe that when I see a body," the purple-haired woman stated. "What are they doing?"

"I think they're coming this way," Kisame stated. "Good news?"

"It'll do," Naruto replied, "and here I was worrying that I'd actually have to track Madara down."

-End

(:ii:)

-Author's notes. Howdy. Been a while, eh? Ever have one of those months where bad shit just doesn't stop coming? A death, two car accidents (one my own), and a technical malfunction. Yeah, it's been one of those months. Don't worry, I knew the death was coming and nobody got really hurt in the accidents. Anyway, I crawled into a bottle and the gym on top of everything else going on in my life. Not a good combination. I did put on ten pounds of muscle, so that's kind of good, but I was so busy and distracted I missed my St. Patty's Day update for the first time in years.

So, the story. I figured I had to move the plot along eventually, so I did. A little. God, am I really up to chapter seventeen? This is probably going to be one of those deals where everything starts happening at once.

Anway, Happy Easter and what not.

Oh, and yes, I actually finished this up right before I posted it so there will be problems. Hey, you want perfect grammar or an update?

One more thing! Everybody sit back, have a drink and enjoy life. Shit changes suddenly and usually not for the better.