A/N: Okay guys, this is going to be a pretty long note. First of all, I would like to thank all of you for your continued support, please keep it up. Next, a bit of news! Zale136 and I are going to be co-authoring a Walking Dead story. We will be writing it under the screen name of Alloy143 and the first chapter will hopefully be up by the end of the week, so please go check it out! Finally, I am getting to the point in this story where I have to make a decision, should I write those lost winter months or skip straight to Season 3? I've decided to start a poll on my profile asking what you guys think, so drop by and vote if you get the chance. I will definitely be taking all of that into consideration when I make my decision. Sorry for the long note, but a lot is going on and I am excited to continue the story. Please read and review, and now chapter 20!
The smell of eggs cooking lured me back to the campsite the next morning. I was groggy from keeping watch all night but the thought of food had me jogging over to the others.
"Whoa, where ya going girl?" Daryl asked when I almost ran into him. He'd been walking over to the camp as well and was coming from behind a tree so I didn't see him. I let out a yelp at the surprise and he had a wry smirk on his face.
"Sorry. I was just trying to wake myself up. I didn't see you there," I stuttered over my words, my heart fluttering a bit too wildly. I felt heat rise into my cheeks and looked down, letting my long brown hair cover my face.
He laughed wryly and started walking again, still a little limp in his step.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, starting to walk beside him.
"I'm fine. I told you there's no need to worry," he replied nonchalantly. I rolled my eyes at him but let it drop as we reached the others.
Rick, Lori, and Carl were all sitting against a tree eating quietly. Something seemed off about them, but I didn't really care. Shane was leaned up against another tree, eyeing me curiously. Andrea was sharpening her knife on a cheese grater and Glenn was sitting off by himself, staring at Maggie who was standing on the porch. Dale was staring at both of them and Carol was serving eggs to everyone. Daryl flopped down in a chair and I saw him grimace quietly. I fought the urge to make sure he was okay, knowing he wouldn't want me to mention it in front of everyone. I sat on the ground next to him and Carol handed me a plate of eggs and a fork.
I ate happily, not speaking to anyone since I was completely focused on eating as much as I could as quickly as possible. I didn't even notice the change in Glenn's demeanor until he began to speak.
"Um guys. So…the barn is full of walkers," everyone paused. For one second, everything was absolutely silent as we all stared at him. I cast a glance at Daryl who was just staring at Glenn, then to Shane, who looked like he might explode at any moment.
"What?" I managed after another minute of silence. My voice apparently broke the spell everyone was under, because all hell broke loose then.
Everyone was talking and yelling at the same time and I couldn't keep up with all the conversations going on. Eventually, I was able to see Shane walking towards the barn in question and I quickly got up to follow him. The rest of the group saw us and came after us. Shane walked up to the door and peered through the cracks in the wood. Now that we were this close, I could hear the moaning inside and the shuffling feet. A shiver ran down my spine thinking about how close these things had been to us while we slept.
One of the walkers jumped at the door and Shane stepped back, starting to pace around all of us.
"You cannot tell me you're all right with this," Shane said after a moment, looking at Rick.
"I'm not. But we're guests here and this isn't our land," Rick said and I looked at him.
"This is our lives!" Shane yelled at him and Glenn told him to lower his voice as the walkers were congealing at the door.
"Don't tell him what to do. He's right. This is insane, we can't stay here with those things right beside us in the barn!" I was starting to panic a little. Everything we'd done, all the fighting, could have been for nothing if these walkers had broken out of the barn.
"We can't just sweep this under the rug," Andrea added.
"This a'int right. Not remotely. We've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right, or we've just got to go. Now we've been talking about Fort Benning for a long time," Shane said and I could hear the fear in his voice which only made mine worse. I could count on one hand how many times I had seen Shane truly afraid and seeing him like that made me nervous.
"We can't go!" Rick yelled.
"Why Rick? Why?" Shane countered.
"Because my daughter is still out there," Carol piped up quietly and we all stopped arguing.
"Okay. I think it's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility," Shane said, rubbing his face with his hands. He was looking at me apologetically, but I was still angry.
"We're not leaving Sophia behind," I said emphatically and my brother looked pained at my words.
"Addie and I are close to finding this girl! I just found her damn doll two days ago!" Daryl added, coming to stand next to me. We'd both worked so hard to find Sophia, especially Daryl. We couldn't just give up now.
"You found her doll, Daryl. That's what you did. You found a doll," Shane was getting angry now and I could feel the tension mounting.
"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!" Daryl's face was turning red with anger and he took a few steps towards Shane.
"I'm just saying what needs to be said! You get a good lead in the first forty-eight hours!"
"Shane, stop," Rick said, standing between him and Daryl.
"Let me tell you something else man! If she was alive out there and saw you all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she'd run in the other direction!" Shane yelled and everything exploded.
Daryl started pushing Rick, trying to get to Shane with the leader trying to separate them. I was yelling at Shane to stop and everyone in the group was screaming something to someone else. Rick was able to keep the two off of each other and after a moment, Daryl stopped struggling. Lori had stepped into the fight and pushed Shane away from Rick who was yelling at Shane to back off.
"Keep your hands off me," Shane warned her and she looked completely shocked.
"Now just let me talk to Hershel!" Rick called, trying to defuse the situation. "Let me figure it out."
"What are you going to figure out?" Shane asked, starting towards Rick again. Lori stepped in again and put her hands on his chest to push him away. I didn't give him the chance to say something, instead I pushed her away from him and walked up to confront her while Rick and Shane continued their argument.
"Are you deaf? Because I'm pretty sure he said for you not to put your hands on him," I said, trying to keep my voice even.
"If we're going to stay, if we're going to clear this barn, I have to talk to Hershel. This is his land," Rick called as I tuned back into the conversation, leaving Lori stunned next to the barn.
"Hershel sees those things in there as people-sick people. His wife. His stepson," Dale spoke up and we all looked at him.
"You knew?" I asked him, feeling a little light-headed and short winded.
"Yesterday. I talked to Hershel," he said nodding.
"And you waited the night?" Shane accused.
"I thought we could survive one more night. We did. I was waiting til this morning to say something. But Glenn wanted to be the one," Dale continued, glaring at Shane with hatred. I was surprised by the display of emotion from the elderly man.
"The man is crazy, Rick. If Hershel thinks those things are alive or-no," Shane ranted and stopped when Rick tried to touch him.
We all stopped when we heard the chains on the barn door rattling. Shane stopped yelling instantly and pushed me behind him as the door started to shake. We all stood in ready stances but the door didn't give. I could hear the walkers groaning, antagonized by our shouting voices. The fire went out of our debate and we all resigned to let Rick talk with Hershel first. We all dispersed to go our own ways. I went to leave when Shane called me. I walked over to him, still standing next to the barn.
"What the hell was all that about?" He asked me and I took a deep breath.
"What do you mean?" I asked, even though I knew perfectly well what my brother was referring to.
"I mean all of that about Sophia and the barn. I thought you had my back on this," he said, starting to pace. I stood still and looked at the ground as I spoke.
"I do. But I told you, I'm going to find her," I nearly whispered.
"I get that, but you totally left me hanging. And the fight with Dixon, you were yelling at me, like it was my fault."
"Shane. I don't want to fight, please, just drop it," I begged in a voice laden with weariness.
"We're not fighting, just talking," he responded, coming to a stop in front of me.
"I told you! I don't have anything else to say!" I screamed at him, all of my frustration and annoyance coming out and I stalked off, not daring to look back.
I saw Daryl stalking into the stables and groaned internally. Here we go again I thought as I started going after him. By the time I walked inside, he was slinging a saddle onto a table, grunting with the effort.
"Daryl," I called softly, my anger towards my brother being pushed to the back of my mind while I dealt with the problem at hand.
"Go away," he said, a hard edge in his voice. Yeah, he was pissed.
"Please don't do this," I begged, slumping against the doorframe, feeling so exhausted I could barely stand.
"I'm not just going to sit around here and do nothing. I'm going to find that girl, and then I'm going to beat the shit out of your brother," he barked and I laughed a little.
"Rick's going out to look. I'll go with him if you want. Just please don't. I'll even help you beat up Shane," I joked but he glared at me. He picked up the saddle to sling it on the horse but stumbled and bent over in pain. I ran over to him and tried to help him stand.
"Just leave me be," he was trying to put venom in the words but it came out more as a plea as he gripped his ribs. I backed away slightly, not wanting to crowd him, but stayed close in case he needed help. "Why do you always have to be so damn reasonable?" he groaned after a minute and started to walk out of the stables.
When he went to walk past me, he looked down into my eyes and patted my shoulder. I nodded, telling him I understood. He had said so much with that one gesture, predominately that he was thankful. My heart was beating a little too quickly when he walked away and I mentally slapped myself. This was definitely not the time to start fawning like a little school girl.
I looked at the horses in the stables and breathed in the scent of fresh hay. It was all so familiar. My best friend in high school had lived on a ranch and he and I used to ride the horses. Over the summers, I would spend most of my days there, I loved the intelligent, loyal animals and the freedom that came along with them.
I picked up the abandoned saddle and dusted it off. It was heavy but felt familiar in my hands. I looked at the horses and found the one I wanted. She was a beautiful mare, solid black with a long mane. I smiled at her and reached out my hands so she could sniff it. She did, and nipped at my fingers, making me laugh. I walked into her carrel and saddled her carefully.
"Hey, beautiful. It's okay, I'm just going to take you out for a run," I whispered to her as I stuck my foot in the stirrup and swung myself onto her back. I smiled at the memories that flooded my mind.
I led her out of the stables easily, all of the instructions coming back to mind as I rode her easily. I let her trot for a while, to the big field in front of the house. I slowly eased up on the reigns, letting her go at a gallop before a full out sprint. When she was going full speed, I could swear I was flying. I laughed and held onto her mane so I wouldn't fall but wouldn't constrict her movement either. My hair was flying all around me and I felt more alive than I had in months, just letting my spirit soar with the horse.
When she grew tired and returned to a trot, I tried to catch my breath from the exhilarating ride. I knew I had a goofy smile on my face as I led her back to the stables. When I got there, I saw Daryl leaning against the door, smiling micheviously.
"What?" I called down to him from where I was sitting on the horse.
"Nothing. I just don't think I've seen anyone that happy since the world went to shit," he grinned and I smiled back. "I didn't know you could ride."
"Yeah, there's a lot about me you don't know," I teased as I jumped down and led her back inside. He followed me as I put her back in her stall and took off the saddle, rubbing her warm skin. "Such a good girl," I crooned to her.
"I can tell. Shane was looking for you earlier," he said and that made me wonder how long I had actually been riding since I had lost all sense of time.
"How long have I been out there?" I asked, trying to gage the sun's position in the sky.
"About an hour, give or take," he responded and I was shocked. He laughed. "Don't worry, we're all alive."
"I'd better go see what he wanted," I said and sighed, so much for my adrenaline high. Daryl nodded and we both walked back outside.
I saw Andrea and T-Dog walking up to the porch where Maggie, Glenn, Lori, Carl, and Beth were sitting.
"You haven't seen Rick?" I heard Lori ask and Daryl and I exchanged a look before heading over to them.
"No, he and I were supposed to leave a couple hours ago," Andrea answered and I heard Daryl groan.
"Yeah you were. What the hell?" He called out as we reached them.
"Rick told us he was going out," Andrea continued and I saw Daryl's temper start to flare.
"Damn it! Isn't anyone taking this seriously? We got a damn trail! Oh here we go," Daryl ranted and I turned to see Shane walking up with the bag of guns slung over his shoulder.
"What's all this?" Daryl asked, walking up to meet him.
"You with me man?" Shane asked and extended a shotgun to him.
"Hell yeah," Daryl responded and took the gun and cocked it.
"You already got yours?" He asked Andrea and handed me mine.
"Yeah. Where's Dale?" Andrea asked him.
"He's on his way," Shane said dismissively and handed a gun to T-Dog who looked at him skeptically.
"I thought we couldn't carry," he said, arching an eyebrow but Shane didn't pause.
"We can and we have to. Look, it's one thing sitting around here picking daisies and riding horses when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. How about you man? You gonna protect yours?" He asked Glenn, offering him a gun as well. Glenn cast a glance at Maggie and took the gun. "That's it. Can you shoot?" He asked Maggie and she looked at him in bewilderment.
"Can you stop? You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight," she said but my brother didn't pay her any attention. He was acting strange but I couldn't say I disagreed with him.
"We can't leave," Carl called from the porch, walking down the steps with Lori.
"We aren't going anywhere. Hershel's just going to have to understand. He'll have to. Now I want you to take this, take it. I want you to keep your mom safe, do whatever it takes," Shane said, kneeling in front of Carl and offering him a pistol. Lori stepped between them.
"Rick said no guns. This is not your call. This is not your decision to make," she hissed and my anger spiked.
"Just shut up Lori! We're doing this to keep you and your precious 'house-wife' game safe," I snapped. I would have continued but I heard T-Dog.
"Oh shit," he said and we all turned to see what he was talking about.
The sight was something so surreal my brain couldn't process it right away. Rick, Hershel, and Jimmy were walking out from the woods with walkers on leashes. We all stared for a second but then Shane jumped up and started running towards them, sparking Daryl and me to follow. The two of us stayed slightly behind Shane who was sprinting for the trio.
"Shane!" Lori yelled but we kept running and I could tell the others were following.
"What is that?" Shane yelled and Rick held up his hand.
"Shane, just back off," he said and we stopped running as we closed the distance.
"Why do you people have guns?" Hershel asked and I heard Shane scoff.
"Are you kidding me? Look at what they're holding onto!"
"I see who I'm holding onto," Hershel said and I laughed out loud.
"No, man, you don't" Shane said, pacing around them, keeping a safe distance from the restrained walkers.
Everything went crazy then, Shane shouting about how they weren't people, Hershel yelling that he was wrong, and Rick asking that we all talk. Daryl and I had guns pointed at the walkers who were fighting to get to us.
"Let me ask you something Hershel. Could a living, breathing, person, could they survive this?" Shane asked loudly, breaking the chaotic yelling. He pulled his gun and shot three rounds into the female walker's chest. Rick yelled for him to stop but Shane was outraged now. "Could someone who's alive, could they just take that? Why's it still coming?" Two more shots rang out. "That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?" Two more shots and my ears were ringing as the walker fought harder and harder to get free.
"That's enough Shane!" Rick yelled, trying to keep a hold on the other walker.
"Yeah, you're right man. That is enough," Shane said in an even tone and one last shot rang out and the walker stopped moving, slumping into the dirt with Hershel still holding the pole.
"Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone! Enough living next to a barn full of things trying to kill us! Enough. Rick, it a'int like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting, right here, right now!" Shane yelled and ran to the barn.
"Take the snare pole!" Rick yelled to Hershel who was knelt in the dirt next to the dead walker. He kept shouting for Hershel to take control of the walker while Daryl and I kept our guns trained on it. Shane was beating the barn door with an ax, trying to break the chains.
"No, Shane. Don't do this, brother! Wait!" Rick called but it didn't stop him. My heart was thundering and the adrenaline poured into my veins.
"Don't do it!" Glenn yelled.
"Rick!" That was Lori's voice.
There was more pleading and yelling but I couldn't hear anymore over the sound of blood pounding in my ears. The chains gave and Shane beat on the door before moving out, luring the walkers out. They came. They poured out of the barn and we all fired. Daryl, Shane, Andrea, and I all started shooting immediately. Glenn joined in a moment later with T-Dog. Rick was still holding the other walker but Shane turned and shot it easily and it fell to the ground.
We plowed through the walkers in a minute with no close calls but I still felt shaky as we surveyed the damage. Hershel, Maggie, Beth, and Patricia were all crying, Hershel kneeling on the ground beside the fallen pole-walkers. Glenn went over to try and comfort Maggie, but she was almost inconsolable looking at the slain 'people' all around us. Shane looked satisfied while Daryl looked relieved and Rick distraught. Everyone was trying to cope in their own way. Me? I was shaking and I felt dizzy, something definitely wasn't right here, but I shrugged it off when I heard a moan from inside the barn. My head whipped around quickly, gun ready to go.
What I saw nearly sent me to my knees. Little Sophia. Little Sophia was a walker. Little Sophia was a walker and was walking out of the barn towards us. We all froze, not really knowing how to react. I heard a sob and saw Carol beginning to run forward out of the corner of my eye. Daryl reached out and grabbed her, and they both fell to the ground. He kept his arms around her, trying to stop her from running to her daughter. I saw the look of pure anguish on her face and the one of lost hope on Daryl's. I watched as a mother lost her daughter right before her eyes.
Before, there had been hope. The slightest chance that Sophia could be alive, but now. Now all hope was lost and there was no denying that the innocent child who had run around camp playing dolls, was now a monster who wanted to kill us. She was still shuffling towards us, Carol's cries the only sound.
Finally, Rick stepped up, drawing his gun. My brain didn't even really have time to process what was happening before I heard the shot ring out and saw Sophia fall to the ground. Tears sprang to my eyes without my permission and as hard as I tried to push them back, they came. I felt one roll down my cheek before I was able to get control. Carol was breaking my heart and now I heard Carl crying as well. I turned around stiffly to see Lori clinging to him, shedding her own tears.
"Don't look. Don't look," Daryl was murmuring to Carol, trying to pull her to her feet. She shoved him away, looking somewhat crazed before walking away. I stared after her for a moment before turning back to the scene. I heard Beth sobbing then and saw her stumbling towards one of the fallen walkers.
"Shh. Shh. Wait. Wait," Rick called to her but she pushed him away and kept going. She pulled a male walker off of a female one and went to kneel beside her.
"Ma," she called quietly. My heart dropped when I saw the walker reach out for her and grab her by the hair. Daryl, Rick, Glenn, Shane, and I all ran forward and started pulling her away, hoping it wasn't too late.
T-Dog jumped on the walker and started stomping at her but she kept reaching so he had to back away. She was starting to get on her feet when a sickle suddenly went through her head. She slumped to the ground and I saw Andrea wielding the weapon. Everyone started to come alive then. Hershel was leading his family back to the house with Shane and Rick following behind them, Shane yelling about Sophia being in the barn. I was rooted where I stood, I couldn't take my eyes off of the little girl.
"We should bury her," I heard someone say, even though it felt like they were talking through a fan. I turned and saw Daryl standing beside me. I nodded as much as I could, but my vision was narrowing and I felt like I couldn't breathe.
Daryl knelt down beside her and I looked at him curiously. He pulled something out of his bag and laid it beside her. When he stepped away, I saw it was her doll, the one he had found in the woods the other day. I bit my quivering lip, trying not to cry.
"Adeline!" I heard Shane yell and turned to see him stalking towards me. I saw Daryl's eyes narrow and he took a couple steps forward before I held out a shaky hand to stop him. I shook my head ever so slightly, afraid any more than that would give birth to a new round of dizziness.
"What is it Shane?" It felt like I was speaking with marbles in my mouth but he must have understood me.
"We need to talk. Alone," he added the last part after glaring at Daryl. I sighed but walked with him. He led me over to some trees and I was thankful for the shade.
"Look, a lot has happened today," he started.
"You can say that again," I laughed hysterically.
"Just listen, please. I was looking for you earlier because…because… Lori's pregnant, Addie," he looked helpless and I felt awful. With everything that had happened the last few days I had completely forgotten about Lori. I decided to stay quiet. He must have taken that for shock because he continued. "Then, Dale took off with the guns and I followed him. We got into it in the woods. He pointed a gun at my chest and accused me of killing Otis. Addie?" He stopped talking when he saw me slump against the trunk of the tree.
I was sweating and breathing heavily. Something was wrong. My vision was starting to come and go and I felt the ground rushing up on me as I collapsed.