A/N: Sorry for another break..just finishing up a lot of school stuff, but I'm on Spring Break this week, so expect a lot of updates! Please remember to go vote in the poll on my profile about whether or not to include the winter months in this story! Please enjoy!
It was awkward standing there with Daryl after Shane departed, our heat-filled moment still hanging heavily in the air between us.
"I, um, I better get back up to the house. You know, just in case…in case there are symptoms," I was rambling and retreating, not sure where all of this left us.
"Addie," he called and I turned back towards him eagerly, hoping he'd provide some insight as to what I was supposed to do next. "Never mind," he said; shaking his head and my hopes fell.
I nodded at him, chewing on my bottom lip and walked away. Just as I got to the top of the hill, I swore I heard him say 'Come back' but when I turned back; he was starting at the stick in his hands. I shook my head, trying to clear the fog. I practically ran to the house, trying to get out of the cold, even though Daryl's jacket was still wrapped around me.
"Where have you been?" Andrea asked me once I walked in the door. Everyone was sitting in the living room and they all stared at me when I walked in.
I could only imagine what I looked like then, hair tousled by the wind, eyes wide with energy, the oversized coat, and the scratches on my arms that felt like they were burning through the sleeve, demanding to be noticed. I saw everyone glance down to where the scratches were and it made me slightly self-conscious so I tugged on the end of the sleeve, pulling it down even further to where my whole hand was encased in the cloth.
"Nowhere," I said dismissively, putting back on my air of confidence. I would never allow the rest of the group to see me as vulnerable as Daryl had. I walked with my head held high towards the kitchen and I heard footsteps behind me. It was Carl.
"What's up kiddo?" I asked him once I made it to my destination. I rummaged for a glass and filled it with some water before leaning against the counter and facing him.
"Are you going to die?" He asked bluntly but I didn't flinch. Carl had always been like a little brother to me, I was comfortable with him.
"You know what happens when someone is scratched or bitten," I responded, not able to make myself say the words.
"Yeah, but Andrea said that they may not be walker scratches," his face still held so much childlike innocence; it was hard to meet his gaze.
I sat the glass down and knelt in front of him, grabbing his hand. "Carl, it's not very likely. It's okay, though, you'll be fine. You have your mom and dad and Shane and the rest of the group, they'll all take good care of you. Just promise me something. Promise me you'll stay like this, sweet and innocent, don't let this world drag you down," I told him. This goodbye wasn't as difficult as I knew Shane's was going to be, but I still found my voice catching. "I'm sorry we haven't spent as much time together lately, but you've always been like a brother to me."
He hugged me then, wrapping his arms around my neck and squeezing. I froze for a second, I wasn't used to this type of display of affection, but I hugged him back. When he let go I stood up and ruffled his hair. If someone had told me a week ago that this would be happening I would have laughed in their face, but now it was my reality. I left the kitchen and walked back into the living room.
"Adeline. Would you like to talk about it?" Dale asked and I immediately shook my head. No way was I doing any more of this emotional stuff right now, especially with my head spinning with questions I may never get answers to. I flopped down onto the couch next to Andrea and everyone fell quiet.
"What?" I asked, growing annoyed by the way everyone was treating me, after all, I wasn't dead yet. I was met by a bunch of sympathetic gazes and I sighed and stood back up. I stormed out of the living room and walked back on the porch, gulping in the fresh air of another cool night. It seemed like this was the norm lately, everyone pissing me off and me taking refuge outside.
I looked out into the fields, everything looked fine. It was truly amazing that this farm had lasted this long, in a little bubble of bliss amongst the shit storm that was the world today. I walked over to the rockers and sat down, but I was too anxious and fidgety to sit. I wondered if that was a symptom of the virus but I shook my head. I couldn't think about that now. I walked off of the porch and over to our group of tents and into mine.
My tent was small compared to some of the others, but it was plenty of room for me. I grabbed my bag and started rummaging in it, looking for something specific. I finally found what I was looking for, my sketchbook and a pencil. Shane had tried to convince me to leave it behind, but it was the one thing from my old life I had to cling to, so here it was. I sat down on my pallet of blankets and pulled my knees up to my chest, balancing the book on them, and started to draw.
I didn't even realize what I'd been drawing until the familiar features stared up at me from the page. It was a picture of Daryl, from today in the woods. He was leaning up against a tree, arms crossed over his chest and a smirk on his face. My face flamed like he could see the picture. I slammed the book closed and ran my fingers through my unruly hair. This definitely was not what I should have been thinking about, I should have been thinking about if Shane was okay, if I was going to hurt anyone when I turned, important stuff. I couldn't deny, however, that drawing had calmed me down.
I chewed on my lip, weighing a decision. Then, before I could change my mind, I grabbed my book, opened it to the page, tore it out gently, folded it, and slid it into the pocket in his jacket. Then, after another minute of thought, I took it back out, flipped it over, and wrote Thanks for everything—Addie on the back. I returned it to the pocket and stood up, stretching out my stiff muscles. I must have been drawing longer than I thought because when I climbed out my tent I saw headlights pulling up into the yard. It was the car Shane had taken. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw him and Lori climbing out, looking no worse for wear. I jogged up to the house quickly, meeting up with him on the porch.
"Hey!" I called and he looked at me. He smiled half-heartedly but waited for me before ascending the steps. I saw everyone else running to where Lori was getting out of the car, holding a piece of cloth to her head.
"Oh my God, are you alright? What happened?" Andrea asked her.
"I was in an accident, I'm fine," She said.
"She was attacked," Shane interjected, walking back to her side.
"I really am. Where's Rick?" She asked and I cast a glance at my brother. He was looking at the ground so I figured I was right. He had lied to get her back here.
"They're not back?" She asked after seeing all of our faces. "Where are they?" She demanded of my brother who was now leaning against another car.
"Look I had to get you back here," he said and met her eyes easily. I caught Dale looking at Shane like he was a monster and I was definitely confused by that. He'd done what he had to, no shame in that.
"You asshole," Lori hissed and started marching up to the house.
"Lori!" Shane called after her and walked in front of her, grabbing her shoulders when she tried to walk past him.
"He's my husband," she said, struggling against him.
"Lori, I will go after him. I will find him", he said and she pulled away from him. "Hey! First things first. I gotta look after you. I gotta make sure the baby's all right," Shane continued, backing up so she wouldn't feel threatened.
"You're having a baby?" It was Carl's voice and we all froze. "Why didn't you tell me?" That was a good question, why hadn't she?
"Come on, let's make sure you're okay," Dale said after a few seconds of silence.
"Come on," Andrea encouraged and put an arm around Lori's shoulder. The three of them and Carl walked in the house without another word.
"How you feeling?" Shane asked me although his eyes stayed glued to the door.
"Same," I said just as a gust of wind assaulted me. I pulled the jacket around me and the sleeve came up just enough for me to see the scratches. They looked the same but that didn't mean anything.
"Well, if anything changes, come get me," he said and walked away. For some reason, that stung. He walked up to the house and marched through the door, leaving me alone in the cold.
I stood there for a moment, just staring at the closed door. With all the excitement, I hadn't realized how exhausted I was, but now it was setting in hard. I shuffled my way back to my tent, but then realized I couldn't fall asleep out here. I had to be around people so that way if-when—I started showing symptoms, they could handle it. I sighed and walked back towards the house and I saw Andrea, Dale, and Carl walk onto the porch. I walked up the steps and leaned against the railing. Thankfully, they didn't say anything to me.
After a while, my legs started to hurt and I found myself nodding off standing up so I made my way over to one of the chairs and sat down, pulling my knees up to my chest. I started rocking, and before I could stop myself, I was asleep.