A/N-Trigger Warning! This chapter contains a non-con situation, and may be triggering to some readers. NSFW due to possible reaction to reading content. Like the title says...this is ugly. You have been warned.

Time seemed to go by much faster now that Feral and Rinzler were doing patrols together. Usually, there was nothing that required more of Rinzler than his mere presence. He patrolled the Grid as a warning of who a disruptive program would be facing. Rinzler had told Feral that there were rebel factions on the Grid that opposed CLU; but most of them tried to stay quiet whenever possible. Rinzler explained that the majority were small, fragmented groups. They wanted to do something, but did not have enough resources to do anything major. And minor things usually let to their capture.

Feral had seen him in action, once. A sudden gridbug infestation near the edge of the city. It had been almost like watching a different program. While Rinzler always fought with more skill than any other program on the Grid, the fierce joy that he took in battling the danger to the Grid's programs was something that she had never seen before. He was still as calculating as any tactician could want to be, but there was an almost joyous freedom in his movements as he cut a swath through the swarm. It made her remember how he had said once that he had enjoyed being a security monitor when he only had to derezz dangers to the Grid.

She was starting to get an idea of the layout of the city. She had no idea what the outlands past the city looked like. Rinzler had been ordered to never take her there, even if on patrol.

When things were going slowly on patrol, and on one else was around, she taught him more sign language. He only had to be shown a sign once for it to be in his memory files. It meant that the only thing that slowed down the lessons was if she could not remember if she had showed him a sign or not. When one of the BlackGuard had seen her signing to Rinzler once, he had inquired as to what she was doing. Sneering at the Guard, she had informed him that her data included a large file of insulting gestures. Would he like to see the ones that showed what she thought of him, personally?

With following orders to accompany CLU; however, things did not go as smoothly.

While CLU only fastened the tether at night, she was never allowed to leave his quarters without a guard, CLU, or Rinzler present. CLU was taking no chances of her trying to escape again. Without the opportunity for escape, she had to content herself with defying his orders to accompany him every chance that she could. If CLU himself was not there, she would usually ignore the BlackGuards. Rinzler alone would she follow without a fight. More than once a senior guard had been forced to physically drag her to wherever CLU had ordered for her to be. Some of the guards simply left her if she refused—which was every time—knowing that CLU would have her punished later.

On more than one occasion an exasperated Rinzler had asked her why she did so. She knew that it usually meant that he would either have to hold her for CLU to beat; or he would be ordered to beat her himself. The only answer that she was able to give was, "I don't like giving CLU what he wants…." Feral could tell that while Rinzler understood and respected her decision, it bothered him to be forced by his programming to hurt her. He had tried to go easy on her once, when CLU's orders were not very specific. She had needed to act as though she had been hurt more than she really was in order to keep CLU from noticing.

Feral was leaning an arm against the window, watching the programs that moved across the darkened Grid. Rinzler had told her that he would be taking her on patrol at what she still thought of as midnight, despite having spent months on the Grid.

She heard the footsteps that heralded CLU entering the room. Continuing to watch the programs on the street below, she tried to ignore his presence. She wanted to see if she could identify sections of the Grid that she had been to on patrol from the window.

"You did not join me at the arena earlier," CLU said. His mellow voice was very calm. He could have been discussing Grid traffic—she thought to herself—as bland as his voice was. Feral continued to stand at the window of the dimly lit room, pretending that she was still alone.

"I had given orders for you to join me," he continued mildly. "In fact, I told YOU that I expected you to join me at the arena."

Feral made a 'hmmpff' sound, meant to indicate how little she cared for his orders.

"It is in your best interests to follow my orders," he told her, using the same mild tone.

She turned to look at him; leaning back against the window as she did so. She crossed her arms over her chest, and glared at CLU. "And why should I care about your orders?" she demanded of him. "You just want to be able to show the Grind that you have tamed your 'glitchy little pet'. What are you going to do to me if I just ignore you?" She took a step forward. "Are you going to hurt me if I don't do what you want?" Another step towards CLU. "Or maybe you will order Rinzler to hurt me…. Guess what, CLU? You already have. And it's not working, is it?" Feral took another step closer to CLU and gave a derisive laugh.

"I don't think that there is anything that you can make me do, if I don't agree to it. You don't have anything left to threaten me with; because I already know that you won't derezz me."

CLU took a few steps closer to where she stood. Now Feral could see the slight smile on his face. "You know, I did spend some time thinking about what to do with you," he said, musingly. "And you are correct about one thing. I will not derezz you."

I thought to myself, what can I do to make her understand her place here?" CLU continued, walking in a small circle around her, tapping a finger against his lip.

Feral snorted at that. "My place?" she asked scornfully, "And what exactly is 'my place' supposed to be?"

CLU looked up at her and smiled even more. "It is wherever and whatever I say it is," he replied. "I realize that causing you pain is not getting that fact through to you fast enough. So, I am going to try the opposite tactic."

Now she was thoroughly confused. Unable to keep the bewildered look off of her face, she blurted out, "You're going to try doing what?"

"Tell me, program," CLU asked, his voice casual, "Have you tried overloading your circuits yet?"

"What?" Feral's face was a study in confusion. "Overload—why would I want to do that?" she asked, not understanding why someone would want to—what sounded like—force more current through a gridsuit's circuits than they normally held.

"Well. You are in for something special, then," CLU told her, smiling as he said it. "Why don't you lie down on the bed and get comfortable..."

"I don't think so," she said, suddenly wary of the program standing in front of her. Feral started to back away from where CLU was standing.

"Feral," he said in a chiding tone, "this is so much easier is you do not fight it. Relax, give in, and you can just enjoy it..."

"Not interested," she told him bluntly.

CLU sighed and moved closer. "You are only making this harder on yourself," he told her, working his way around to the other side, forcing Feral to move away from the window. She kept moving back, never taking her eyes off of him. "However," he said, "I did anticipate something like this being your reaction. So, I signaled the guards to come in a moment ago." Raising his voice slightly, CLU looked past her towards the door and said, "Grab her."

Feral spun around to evade the guards that she thought were coming up behind her.

There was no one there.

The realization that she had been tricked flashed through her mind just as she felt the weight of CLU's body crash into her from behind. She was knocked to the smooth, glassy floor, a bright circuit line cutting through the black of the floor where it pressed against her cheek; CLU's weight bearing her down. Feral twisted herself to get out from under him, and tried scrambling to get to her feet. CLU reached out, grabbing her ankle and yanking her back down. Her head slammed into the floor with a dull 'thud', dizzying her for a moment. CLU took advantage of her momentary lapse in fighting to pull her upright and practically throw her onto the bed.

Feral shook her head to clear it and tried to roll off of the bed before CLU could restrain her.

She wasn't quick enough.

The sysadmin straddled her waist; trying to catch her hands as she struggled and screamed at him to leave her alone and let her go. She landed a punch to CLU's face that split his lip. He wiped away the trickle of pixels leaking from the cut with the back of his hand and punched her—hard—in the face. Her head snapped back and seemed to spin from the force of the blow. CLU used that time to grab her wrists and pin them behind her with one of his hands.

Panting from the exertion, he looked down at her. "Stop struggling so hard. You will enjoy this if you stop fighting it. You really don't know what you have been missing out on, program." With that said, CLU drew a finger gently down one of the thin circuit lines that curved down her suit form her collarbone to her hips, pressing lightly as he did so. A pleasurable, tingling sensation followed the touch of his fingertip.

"See," he told her. "That was not so bad, now was it? I bet you even liked it. And we are just getting started."

With a growing sense of dread and horror, Feral understood exactly what CLU meant now when he spoke of 'overloading her circuits'. Panicking, she began struggling even harder, becoming desperate to get free.

She could feel CLU's free hand on her circuit lines; touching, stroking, sliding, and pressing gently. The care that he was taking as he teased his fingers along her suit's circuits was worse—in its own way—than the beatings that the same hand usually delivered as a punishment. She became even more panicked as he heard CLU tell her that 'when our circuits touch, it will feel even better'.

Almost as if from far away, Feral could hear a pleading voice. It was begging someone to 'stop, just stop'; however, she didn't recognize it as her own. The voice continued to beg, saying it would rather be killed, instead.

All that she was aware of as herself; however, was the increasingly desperate need to get free, away from the building sense of unwelcome pleasure. Dimly, she could feel the blows that CLU delivered to her whenever he decided her struggling had become too much. One such blow caught her in the temple. With a strange sense of relief, she welcomed the blackness that reached up to swallow her.

Feral was vaguely aware of a weight, pressing and sliding along her as she floated up thought the blackness. What was it? She couldn't tell. Her eyes opened to see a gloved hand with yellow circuits on in next to her head. Following the glowing yellow line, her eyes were led up an arm to CLU's face. A look of intense concentration was on his face as he moved above her.

The memories and knowledge of what was happening came back in a rush; causing her to suddenly begin struggling as hard as she could. A moment later, CLU gave a satisfied cry and tensed above her. Breathing heavily, he looked down at her face and smiled.

"All right, then," he said. "That was enjoyable. I am afraid you may have missed out on the best part, Feral, but don't worry. We will do this again." Saying that, CLU reached up and stroked her face with his hand.

She stared up at him in shock. He released his hold on her and climbed off of the bed where she still lay. She could hear him moving about the darkened room. A few moments later, he returned to where she lay, unmoving.

"I have business to take care of," he told her. "I will return later." After speaking, CLU turned and left.

She rolled off of the bed and hit the floor on her hands and knees. Like a trapped, wounded animal she sought the smallest, darkest corner in the room to try to hide in. Reaching it, she curled up into a ball and tried to wish herself away. Her hair had come loose during the struggle with CLU; and now hung around her head and face. She welcomed the curtain it made. One more thing between her and what was out there.

What was out there was CLU.

Rinzler opened the door to CLU's quarters to meet Feral for patrol. The silent room was darker than she normally kept it, but not much more so. She had once said that keeping the lights dim meant that she could have some sense of privacy. He could understand that, as he prized his helmet for the same reason. The silence, however, was unexpected. He often found a new piece of User music playing when he arrived. She had laughingly told him once that she would play every piece of User music that she had for him at least once.

"Feral?" he called. "Where are you?"

When there was still no answer, Rinzler ordered the light levels up. He would have been notified if she had been taken from the room. The feeling that something was very wrong tugged at him insistently. He needed to find her, and soon. Whatever was wrong, it had to do with her somehow.

He began to systematically search the room. A muffled sound, like a smothered whimper led him to her location. He finally found her in the foot space under CLU's desk. Crouching, Rinzler looked in at her. She was huddled in a ball in the cramped little space. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest, almost hidden by her knees pulled up as close to her as possible. It was as if she were trying to protect herself from something. Her hair was loose, and hung around her face; shielding it from his view. Worried that she injured, Rinzler reached out towards her.

He stopped and drew his hand back when she suddenly flinched at the approach of his hand. "Feral?" he asked cautiously. "Are you injured?"

The only answer that he received was a shudder that ran through her.

"Feral, I need to see if you are hurt," he said, carefully. "I am going to move your hair so that I can look at you. Do you understand?"

A thin, keening whimper cut through the air in the darkness under the desk. It made Rinzler feel as though gridbugs were crawling along his circuits. If asked, he would have said that it sounded like a program having its code deleted while it was trying to complete a function. Hearing the sound coming from her made him worry even more, if such a thing was possible. Very slowly, as if he was trying to coax a wild bit to come to him, he reached into where she sat wrapped around herself.

"It is me, Rinzler, your friend," he told her, his voice soothing. "May I move your hair? I will do nothing to hurt you. I give you my word." He continued to speak soothingly to her as the fingers of his gloved hand slowly crept close enough to brush her face. Being careful to not move suddenly, he gently moved her hair back away from her face with his fingertips. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of her face. More than a third of her face was swollen. The dark bruise extended from the newly-healed scar on her cheekbone, up the side of her face and into her hairline. Worse than the bruises, however, was the way that she trembled and flinched at every touch or movement of his. Feral refused to open her eyes and look at him. There had to have been more involved than simply a vicious beating. She had never reacted this way before, no matter what CLU had done, or ordered to be done. What had happened to her?

"Will you come out?" he asked her, still speaking as softly and soothingly as he could. "I will keep you safe, my word on it," he coaxed. "We can get you some energy and treat those injuries."

A shake of the head and a whispered, "You can't…" was the response he received.

"No, I will. Just…come out, so I can help you," he pleaded.

"It was CLU."

The whispered words fell like stones. She was right. He could not keep her safe from CLU.

Rinzler shifted position so that he was kneeling on one knee to put his head closer to the level of hers. "Feral," he asked carefully, "what did CLU do to you?"

He held very still as a trembling hand reached out towards him. Extending a finger, she drew it shakily down the circuit line on his hand.

Rinzler sat down hard as the knowledge of exactly what CLU had done to her dawned on him. He put out a hand on the floor to brace himself against falling as the understanding hit him. Under the sharp planes of his helmet—where no one could see him—his face was pale. "Oh, my User," he whispered, shocked. CLU had forced a circuit overload on her. He had never heard of such a thing happening to a User before. Circuit overloading was always either done privately by oneself; or with an agreeable partner who wanted to share the intimacy of a mutual overload. It was extremely rare for a program to be so corrupted that it would attempt to do so with an unwilling partner. Whenever such a violation had occurred, here or on the old Encom system, the offending program was deleted.

Users, Feral did not even know what a circuit overload was before this. He had never told her about it….

"Oh, Users, Feral," he said in a hoarse near whisper, the rough sound of the broken voxels in his throat making the distorted growl that colored his voice even more prominent. "I will not touch you again, until you tell me I can. I am your friend. We are alone now. I just want to help you however I can. Will you please let me help you?" His hands moved, signing his words to her with the sign 'true' to verify what he was saying; although he was not certain that she could see well enough in the darkness under the desk.

She slowly lifted her head to look directly at him. "Is there anywhere safe from CLU that you can take me?" she asked in a pleading whisper. "Somewhere that he can't find me?"

Rinzler shook his head. "I would like to Feral, but I cannot. CLU knows all of the developed areas of the Grid. And I have been ordered to never take you into the Outlands."

"Outlands?" she whispered.

"The areas that are not developed parts of the Grid. It is a …wild place; full of hidden areas. No one knows all of it; not even me. I used to scout it for Grid development. Now, I only go into the edges after rebels. Without enough energy, you can derezz if you are not lucky enough to find an energy spring.

A muffled sob escaped her. "I don't want to stay here. I don't want him to do that ever again."

"I know," Rinzler said softly. "Please come out so I can help you as much as I can…." Slowly, painfully slow, he talked her out of her hiding space. As he helped her to treat her injuries and gave her more energy, he tried to hide his unhappiness.

Because CLU was certain to notice how she reacted to being forcibly overloaded. And that meant that CLU was almost certain to do it again.

He stayed until finally—still sobbing quietly—she fell into an exhausted, if fitful sleep; still huddled tightly into a ball.

Rinzler was right. CLU did notice her behavior. Rinzler had stayed with Feral, watching over her as she slept. Occasionally, she shuddered and twitched in her sleep; as if trying to avoid something.

He had sent a message out to the BlackGuard, informing them that he would not be patrolling this microcycle; and to increase other patrols in the scheduled areas instead.

CLU had returned to his quarters much later in the microcycle. The system administrator appeared to be tired and pre-occupied upon his arrival. Any hopes that he would not notice the state that Feral was in, however, were quickly dashed.

CLU had walked over to where she slept, still tightly curled into a ball. Rinzler stood nearby, standing guard against everything that he could protect her from. He wished that everything included CLU.

"You did not take her on patrol?" CLU questioned his enforcer, his gaze on Feral as she lay there.

Rinzler shook his head 'no' as his growl began to become audible. The low rumble of sound could barely be heard, as though it was trying not to wake the sleeping figure on the floor.

"Did she give you any difficulty?" CLU asked him sharply, looking up from her. Rinzler shook his head again.

"Good," CLU said, nodding his head as if he had just had something confirmed to him. "That is good."

You will have a patrol next microcycle in the areas you would have patrolled earlier. I do not want anyone thinking that it will not be patrolled for a while. You can take her on a late patrol in a microcycle or two." CLU's gaze when again to the slight figure curled on the floor. "You are dismissed for now," he said absently.

Rinzler gave a slight bow of his head and turned to leave. Only the slightest hesitancy showed his true feelings about leaving CLU alone with her. Rinzler looked back at Feral from the corner of his eye, wanting to stay, but unable to disobey CLU's order.

CLU continued to look down on her as she slept. After a few moments, he dropped down to crouch on his heels near her. "Feral," he called softly, a slight sing-song to his voice as he waited for her to wake. "Fer-ral."

At the sound of her name, her eyes fluttered and blinked open. CLU smiled as he saw her eyes widen when she recognized him.

"Ready for bed?" he asked her, smiling. He reached out his hand toward her. His smile grew brighter as he saw her flinch away from his touch. "I will even let you sleep in my bed this time," he said in a caressing tone. "You would like that, wouldn't you?" CLU continued to reach for her, only to watch as she attempted to scurry away from his touch until her back hit the wall. As his hand came closer to her, she turned her head away. A whimper escaped from the lips that she was biting, trying to keep cries trapped inside.

"You do not want to join me on the bed?" he asked, halting his hand's advance and pretending surprise. "I thought we had ourselves a good time, earlier."

At the mention of what he had done, a choked sob broke loose from her throat.

"Well," CLU said thoughtfully as he rested his chin on his fist. "I could let you sleep here; if I could trust that you would remain where you are now and would behave. Can I trust you to do so?"

Feral nodded her head almost franticly, desperate to stay further away from him. CLU stood up and looked down at her as she huddled away from him.

"Give me your disc," he told her. He smiled she reached behind her to remove her disc quickly. She held it out, trembling as she fought not to throw it and run. CLU reached out and took it from her hand.

"Good girl," he said softly. "You are learning." Rising, he put her disc down where it would be within his reach; and began to prepare for his sleep cycle. Behind him, Feral held herself and silently wept scalding tears.

CLU ended his sleep cycle. On the other side of the room, he could see Feral still watching him warily as he sat up in the bed. The sheets slid down to pool around his waist. "Did you get enough rest?" he asked her cheerfully; one hand idly scratching at his chest lightly. A simple glance was enough to show him that she had rested very little, if at all.

CLU climbed out of the bed and walked over to where Feral still crouched; smiling a little when she flinched as he came closer. "Here," he said, holding her disc out to her. "You can have this back now." When she did not take it from his hand, he dropped her disc to clatter on the floor.

"I have a lot to do right now," he told her, turning away and going to his desk. "But I will be back before too long. We can continue your lessons then." CLU sat a canister of energy on the desk and began to walk to the door. He rezzed his gridsuit to cover himself fully.

"You will want to intake all of that energy, " he said as he reached the door "I think that you will need it later." He opened the door to leave. "I am leaving a guard on the door to assist you if you require help," he continued, pausing in the doorway. "Don't worry, I won't be gone long."

With that, CLU stepped through the doorway and left. The door slid shut behind him.

A/N- no songs in this chapter. I refused to try to put a song in; just...no.