"What?"I looked up. My entire body was paralysed with shock. I wasn't yet calculating what had just been said to me.
"I'm sorry ." The doctor shot me a pitying look. I just stared at him back. The man was already preparing to take his leave.
"L-lung cancer?" I croaked. My voice cracked multiple times in those two words. He said nothing to me as he gathered up his belongings.
"I suggest you see someone about it. A therapist or support group?" The doctor waved his hands aimlessly before heading towards the door. "But I'm afraid I must take my leave now. Goodbye ." And that was it. The house was silent other than the large slam of the front door.
Two years.
Two fureaking years.
They had been living in that house for only two years. The Titans were all dead and only the scars marked on skin and soul were left in their wake. But even then, somehow, something managed to take him away again.
It wasn't until Levi came home did I break. How could I tell him I was dying. How do you tell someone that had been surrounded by death that you are dying. The person you promised to be with forever.
But of course Levi noticed. He had been the one to push me towards getting myself checked. He was the one who insisted that I made sure.
Now I had the answer.
But he didn't say anything. He just took my hand and sat beside me as I cried, muttering incoherent words and slurs. He hugged me and peppered my face with gentle kisses, running his fingers through my hair. Comfort that made everything worse.
I did manage to tell him. I started with me mumbling a bit louder until he got impatient and snapped at me to just tell him. I knew he was worried. He was always worried.
"I'm dying" were the only two words I could say. He had frozen in shock at the words, but then he just wrapped his arms around me. He said nothing for a while again.
"What is it?" Was the first thing he said to me after. I was shaking badly but I needed him to know.
"L-lung cancer. It's t-too early to t-treat." I managed to choke out.
Yes I remember that day clearly.
It was only a few months ago, how could I forget it.
Now as I lay on the hospital bed, hooked up to fancy machines that were brand new, I couldn't help but wonder. What would have happened if I had gotten checked out earlier? Would I still be dying, or would I be alive and healthy?
But really, would I have the gold band around my finger, my hand resting on my lover's? Would I have this joy as I slowly feel the blackness press at the edges of my vision?
The joy of knowing he's still there.
The joy of hearing his voice of reassurance.
And the joy of being able to say "I love you Levi, and I'll be there to the end.".