Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any characters featured in either of the seasons.

A.N: Thanks for all the reviews!

With Ben In Between

He stared out at the rainy, bleak world through the window of the loft. It was quiet tonight, well as quiet as it could be in the big city he lived in. at times like this, when he was alone to think, he would always think about the past and everyone there. He would go back to those times and places that seemed to still haunt him, in a good and bad way. At these times even the Blue Lady could put his mind at rest.

Thinking of that, he fingered the pendent that hung around his neck. He couldn't help but smile as his thumb ran over the inscription on the back. It always did make him smile, and it also always reminded him of when he had received it. It had been a gift from Alec when they had graduated to weapons training. There father had been so proud of them, he threw a huge celebration party for them.

After they had had their fill of the celebration, Alec and he had stolen some alcohol from the bar and snuck off to have their own party at "their place" or the "high place" as Alec nicknamed it.

"Ahh, no place like the high place!" Alec joked as he reached the old shack. Walking around the small area he began to light the many candles, lighting up the place. Ben smiled and pulled out the bottles of liquor and inspected what had been stolen.

"Are we getting wasted tonight brother?" Ben joking asked as he read the labels Alec had acquired. Scotch, Jack Daniels, and Hot Damn.

"Why not? Even perfect soldiers break the rules. Besides be deserve it!" Alec replied pulling out their hidden shot glasses. Grabbing the bottle of scotch, he took a swig. Grabbing a stool, Alec kicked the other one to his brother and sat down. As Ben sat down, Alec pulled something from his pant pocket and tossed it his brother. "Congrats," he said simply.

Opening the box Ben saw a beautiful gold pendent with the Blue Lady engraved in the center. Surrounding the image of the Lady, was a Latin inscription reading, 'The Blessed Blue Lady.' Picking the pendent out of the box. Ben realized there was something on the back. Flipping the pendent over, Ben couldn't help but crack up laughing when seeing what was there.

"To Benny

From the goodlooking #1"

"Thanks Alec," Ben laughed.

"Welcome, now get drunk!" Alec tossed the bottle in his hands at Ben, who laughed and took a long hard swig from the bottle.

And they did that night, get drunk. It was one of the last times he spent free time with Alec, before their falling out. Thinking of that made Ben miss his brother even more. He also felt a clench in his gut. Guilt. It was his fault, he knew that now and he knew it then. But he had been blinded then and taken his rage out of Alec, the one who in the end lost everything. His life of freedom he had so desperately wanted.

Sighing Ben pushed away from the window. He had been doing this a lot lately, Thinking and regretting. Ever since Max had taken a trip to Seattle to see her friends. "That's it," he grabbed his jacket and keys and left his loft. He needed to make things right

'Information. City and state please.'

"Washington D.C."

'Name please.'

"Alec McDowell."

"One moment please. The address is Manticore Base 1, Lydecker Hall, Apartment X5-493." Clicking his phone off, Bean reached his car and immediately peeled out of parking.

RING RING RING

"Hello?"

"Yes this New York Memorial Hospital, I'm calling for Alec McDowell."

"This is he," Alec mumbled trying to wake up enough to process what was being said to him.

"I'm calling about a patient we currently are treating, Ben McDowell." You were listed as next of kin." At hearing this, Alec shot out of his bed and immediately found clothes and shoes, "is this correct?"

"Yeah, he's my brother, what happened?"

"He was in a car accident-"

"Listen, I'll be there as soon as I can!"

"Hi I'm Alec McDowell, my brother is a patient here!" Alec rushed to the front desk.

"Mr. McDowell?" A voice came to the left of him.

"Yeah," turning a man stood in front of him in a white lab coat.

"I'm Dr. Sandeman, I'm responsible for treatment of your brother." Taking the doctor's out stretched hand, Alec waited for more information to mentioned. "Come with me," following the doctor Alec found himself in the ICU ward. There, for the first time in 5 years, Alec saw his brother. "He was hit by a car while standing on the side of the raod."

"Will he be ok?" Alec asked in a small voice. He was standing at the side of the bed staring at his brother's battered body. It didn't seem real. When he heard the doctor sigh, alec swiftly turned his attention to the other man.

"I'm afraid he is brain dead, and there is very little chance of ever regaining conscious. We did everything we could. When every option was exhausted we placed him on life support to wait for further instruction from the family, you." Seeing Alec's reaction the doctor bowed his head, "I'm sorry to give you this news. I'll leave you alone. Find me if you need anything." With that Dr. Sandeman left.

Alec collapsed in the chair beside him. His brother was brain dead. How was it possible?

An hour later, Ben McDowell passed away with his twin brother by his side. Alec felt as if a part of him died with his brother.

After the necessary arrangements were made and papers were signed, Alec left the hospital and found the closest convient store that sold the hardest liquor. When he acquired the said product he parked himself across the street of Ben's apartment building and drank himself into a stupor.

Two days later, Alec finally worked the courage to go to his brother's living space. Biggs flew into town to help him with the packing and moving of things. "Are you sure you can handle this?" Biggs asked his stoic friend as they pulled flattened boxes from Alec's jeep. Behind his sunglasses and low slung baseball cap, Biggs saw a faint nod of Alec's head as an answer. When everything was gathered the two headed to the front doors of the building.

"Excuse me," a woman spoke as she walked backwards with a large box in her arms.

"No problem," biggs smiled and held the door open for her, and her companion who held the other end of the box. The second girl didn't acknowledge either of the men, instead kept her face down, hidden behind a cap and a mop of dark curly hair.

When the door was clear, the two men headed to the top of building, to Ben's loft.

"You got everything you want?" Viv asked Max as they loaded the last box into their moving van.

"Yeah," Max whispered thickly as she pulled her cap off and ran a hand through her unruly curls. "Thanks," she said not looking at the other woman. Viv pulled max into a hug and let her cry once again on her shoulder.

Stepping into the place his brother had lived for 5 years was one of the hardest things Alec had ever experience. Even though had never been there before, waves of memories hit him with an unspeakable force. Realization that would never be able to reconcile with his brother either stabbed him with a rigid knife. Ben, his brother and once best friend, was dead.