Again, I apologize for the wait. I haven't had a chance to even get on a computer in months between work and life. We were left at a pretty sad point earlier, but hopefully things get better for Emma and the boys. Check out An Adventure Called Supernatural, The Sequel as well! That one's going some great places and my cowriter is awesome. :)

Chapter 24

The cool breeze brushed the top of the field of wheat and teased Emma's bangs against the sides of her face and tickled her neck. The blonde was sitting on the hood of her truck, feet propped on her bumper and elbows on her knees. The sky here in Oklahoma was always so huge. She was sitting, staring
at the acres upon acres of wheat ready for harvest. Over-ready for harvest. They should have done it weeks before. A tractor rolled through, and Emma's red rimmed, swollen eyes followed it back and forth.

Emma Gorden hadn't cried in a long time. Not when she had been betrayed, or shot, or beaten. Not since she had started hunting had she allowed herself that. She could remember the last time she had sobbed flat out - fifteen years ago.

"I don't want to move again." eleven year old Emma was saying as she watched her foster mother neatly pack her clothes. Little Maggie stood in the doorway, as redheaded

and fashionable as she would be years later. Her bottom lip trembled. This foster mother was the only one who Emma had loved. The only one who knew what to say. The only one who loved her.

"I know, sweetheart." Brenda said as she turned around and opened her arms to the little girl. Emma had rushed into the woman's arms and hadn't stopped sobbing until the social worker's car had driven away. The next house she was in she had to leave too – after revealing that the husband had been cheating. She had heard it on his coffee mug. She hadn't cried that day – or the time after that – or ever again.

"Oh, God..." Emma leaned her head down onto her knees, rubbing her hands over her face. "What am I gonna do?" the low whine came from her lips and Emma covered her face in her hands. Shoulders shaking, Emma felt tears run down her hands and onto her wrists. "What do I do?" She was dying. Every day since she had left she could feel Sarah growing stronger in her mind. The nightmares had gotten worse.

Her heart ached for Dean and Sam Winchester. She wanted Dean to hold her and tell her she was going to be okay. She wanted Sam to play cards with her and make her laugh. She wanted them to lie to her. Maggie would know what to say to her. But Emma couldn't stand to see her. She couldn't stand to see anyone.

Emma had been telling herself she preferred o be alone for a long time – but it wasn't until she sat here, staring at the farmhouse she would never have, sobbing on the hood of her truck that she realized how alone she had never really been.

"That was pretty bad, man." Sam said as the brothers climbed into the Impala and pulled away from the house they had just finished at. The images of the boy and girl, turned inhuman from years of abuse, flashed through his mind. As they pulled out into the road he thought – again – about how much he missed the sound of Emma's truck behind them. The brothers hadn't talked about Emma leaving. Neither of them had said a word about it in the last couple weeks. Dean had started drinking in excess and Sam had just been quiet. Neither of them had really realized how much they enjoyed her sarcastic remarks, her long showers as they stood yelling through the door until Dean went in to pull her out, or even her snapping mornings. Dean missed her body and her mind, her angel face and soft hands. Sam missed their card games, her intelligence, and her skill in a hunt. They missed her.

"I enjoyed it, Sam." Dean finally broke the silence. Sam was quiet for a moment waiting for his brother to go on. "I tortured all those souls and I enjoyed it. God help me, I loved it."

"Dean..."

"And Emma's gone because of that." Dean continued. "Y'know? She's gone because I didn't deserve her."

"Dean, Emma's gone because she's scared and she doesn't know how to handle it."

"She knows we're here for her!" Dean shouted angrily. "She knows and she just left! You obviously know her so well. Explain that to me, genius." Sam just sighed and leaned back in his chair. He pouted.

"If you don't know her well enough to know the answer to that, how can you say you love her?" Sam just asked quietly.

Dean didn't say anything to that as he pulled the Impala into yet another bar parking lot. He slammed on the breaks and got out of the car. "You comin'?" he asked aggressively as he stepped out the door.

"Tired." Sam replied shortly and turned in his seat. As Dean shrugged and went inside, Sam pulled out his phone.

"Hey, Emma. It's Sam, again… Hey. Um, Dean and I just came off a case. Gnarly one. We're okay. Dean's just a little shaken up. Me too... I mean... uh... Listen, I miss you a lot. Dean's kinda falling apart. He's, uh, he's in a bar right now. Point is, we really wish you would come back. Bobby's doing a lot of research on the Sarah thing and we're working on it too. We just miss you. You don't even have to come back, y'know? Just call u and let us know you're okay. Please call me. I'm worried. Please just call me back. Bye."

"'Please just call me back. Bye.' Message from one week ago to number 55-" Emma hung up her new phone with a snap and climbed out of her car. Why she had even called her old voicemail he wasn't sure, but in the past few weeks she had been yelled at and begged by Maggie, scolded by Bobby, and called multiple times by Sam. A tornado of emotions flew through Emma's mind as she listened to them speak to her – but no amount of words hurt as bad as Dean's silence. He hadn't called her once. Why?

As Emma let her hair down, she pushed through the door to her motel room. Tossing her gun onto a table, Emma Gordon sighed. This demon possession had been odd – an elderly woman who had killed her husband while possessed. But it was nice, for once, to deal with a demon that didn't have anything to do with the apocalypse. Just a vengeful monster. She missed those.

Emma's drinking habits had gotten "out of hand" one might say. Almost every night she was tipsy, phone hidden from her by the smarter sober Emma. She had never turned to alcohol before. In every other terrible moment in her life she had merely worked harder, spent day and night hunting, or just shut it out. This time around she just wanted to lie in bed when the end of her day came. And most of all she wanted to drink. Tonight she had a glass of ice in her hand and she was pouring tequila into it. She played with her phone in her hand, and decided to sit down and take a few sips as she checked through her music on her player. Picking a song, she sipped tequila and leaned back in her seat.

"God I'm down here on my knees, because it's the last place left to fall
Begging for another chance if there's any chance at all
That you might still be listening, loving and forgiving girls like me..."

A single tear fell down onto her chest, rolling down her cheek as she stared at the ceiling fan. She took a long sip of the tequila, and sighed. In another life Emma would have been a singer. From the age of 6 she had been singing at talent shows and later competitions. She won most of them. Throughout the foster homes the one thing she kept with her was a tape player, that sat battered and rusting in her bag. She recorded country countdowns on Sunday mornings and would play them over and over again to herself in her bed. She never felt so alone. Singing was the only thing that kept her going in times like these, and in these drunken moments while she leaned against her headboard quietly sobbing to herself she wished she had never gotten into this whole hunting business and that she had just picked up her guitar instead. She wished she had given it a shot.

The saddest thing was she was good. She was damn good. More than once had she made her living by singing in a bar and spending her tip money on gas to get to the next hunt. There was something about singing that drove Emma insane with pleasure. Something she loved about it. As she leaned her head against the headboard and took another swig of the tequila, she sang softly to herself. Some sad song about a sad girl - wasn't that her anthem. Her phone turned back and forth in her fingertips.

Emma was scared most of her life, but she ignored it. Emma was upset most of her life, but she ignored it. She was a coward at the end of the day. She had faced the fiercest vampires, the worst demons, been shot and scratched and possessed and plenty would say that she was one of the bravest women they had ever met. But when it came to feeling anything, being genuinely afraid, and her most recent venture with love, she ran scared every time. She could remember with a smile and a shake of her head when she had first become friends with Maggie after they had been sisters for those months.

"Hey, really though Emma. Thanks for the ride." Maggie had been saying as Emma drove down the highway. The blonde, her hair was cut short to her jawline then, shook her head.

"It's not a problem. Not even that far." She answered shortly. She was really quiet all the time these days. Maggie propped her feet out the window and shrugged her shoulders.

"Still, though. It's really great. So tell me what you've been up to." Emma shrugged her shoulders.

"Just hunting. Working a lot." Maggie frowned at her before pointing to the next exit. Emma frowned, still quiet, and turned off the freeway. She didn't say anything as Maggie kept directing her until they were outside a bar. The Roadhouse was hanging from the porch outside.

"Maggie, really no. Not tonight."

"Oh come on! I want you to meet a friend of mine." It was only after Maggie jumped out of the car and screamed "Ash!" that Emma decided to follow.

"Hello?"

"Maggie?" There was a long pause on the other end of the phone.

"Emma?"

"Yeah... listen. I shouldn't have called sorry I'll-"

"Hang up on me you fucking bitch and I'll destroy you." Maggie's voice trembled with emotion, although whether it was anger or relief Emma couldn't tell. "Are you drunk?"

"Yeah."

"Where are you? Wherever you are, I'm on my way."

Kinda short but that's what I could get together tonight. Have class early tomorrow. Hope you enjoyed it!