Kate slipped from the warm sheets at four a.m., padded silently to the bathroom and wrapped herself in the robe she had acquired since staying with him. Rick had fallen asleep shortly after she had practically worshipped his body, using a foreign but attentive reverence she hadn't even known she possessed.

She'd had sex before, great sex, but what she had done with Castle felt far too close to the borderline of more, much more. And more was not an option.

She didn't even know who she was around him anymore - definitely not the seductive, hard edged assassin who had lured him into her trap - but she worried she was beginning to like the person she was when with him better than without, and that was dangerous.

Beckett soundlessly crept out of his suite and tiptoed across the hall to hers in nothing but the stolen bathrobe with her clothes slung over her arm and her shoes hooked on her fingertips. She dropped her belongings in the entryway and slumped back against the door, took a moment to breathe, to collect herself before she ended up panicking. She tried to smooth a hand through her hair, a self-soothing technique she had picked up from her mother, but her fingers were immediately caught in a web of tangles.

The rain had already left her hair into a state of unruly curls and kinks, but Castle's hands had knotted in the locks when they were-

Kate pressed the tips of her fingers into her eyes, as if she could push the returning headache back, and headed straight for the bathroom.

She turned the high-powered shower on as hot as it would go, waited until steam clouded the entire room to step inside the glass enclosure, hissing under the burn of the water, but forcing herself to remain under the scorching spray. Punishment for the slew of mistakes she had made in the last two days.

She combed her fingers through her hair until the knots were eradicated, blindly grabbed for the bar of soap in the dish on the wall and scrubbed rigorously at her pink skin, trying to wash away the last 48 hours from her body to no avail. She still felt him on her, all over her, seeped into her pores, flowing through her system-

"Dammit," she choked, sliding to her knees, the cool tile a relief to her raw skin, as she reached for the shower nozzle, worked it in the opposite direction until the water soothed instead of seared. She was better than this.

Silence and the dark trenches of grief had become her home throughout the last nine years, encompassing her with numbing comfort yet tightening around her like a noose at the same time. She was defined by loss, but she didn't want to lose Castle too. Not to the greedy hands of death.

With a new determination, she cut the shower off and dried quickly with a towel. She dressed in the single work appropriate blouse and pair of slacks she had packed and tied her hair into a wet rope at her neck. She would blow dry it later if she had the time. It was nearing five a.m. in California, but it was already close to eight in New York.

She found her phone in her jeans' pocket by the door and scrolled through the meager display of numbers on the burner cell until she found Gina Cowell's.

It only took one ring for the other woman to answer.

"Is it done?"

"You didn't tell me he had a daughter," she hissed as soon as she was greeted by the callously cool tone of Gina's voice.

Gina scoffed. "Why does it matter?"

"It-" Because of the two hours she spent lying in his bed as he slept, the image of his daughter suddenly fatherless continued to haunt her in the darkness, but she swallowed down her indignation, reminded herself why it mattered to her as a professional and not as an orphan herself. "It matters because it is important information that you failed to include. When my employer told you that the information packet was supposed to consist of all vital facts pertaining to the target, he meant everything. Whether the subject has children or not falls under that category."

"I really don't see why this is such a problem," Gina sighed, as if this conversation was a total waste of her precious time and Kate's nostrils flared.

She wasn't sure how old his daughter was, but Kate would guess she had to be a teenager at least, and from the sounds of their phone calls, Castle and his daughter - Alexis, she remembered him calling her - were close. Castle was a single parent, she was sure of that much, and that meant he was all that Alexis had. Killing Castle would leave his daughter an orphan and Gina didn't see why that was a problem?

"Lying to me can lead to termination of the contract, Ms. Cowell," Kate countered sharply, receiving silence on the other end of the line before she heard the clipped sound of a door being shut.

"I believe the contract ends when I say it does," Gina snapped, and Kate balled her fist at her side, strode towards the closet in the bedroom and began retrieving her clothing from the racks and drawers.

"You don't have that authority. I do. And I say the deal is off."

She startled at the actual snarl Gina released into the phone. "I'm paying you a lot of money to-"

"And you'll be refunded in full," Kate assured her, forcing her voice to remain level, forcing herself not to say something regrettable to a woman she had never liked to begin with.

"You can't do this."

"I can and I have."

"You fell for him, didn't you?" Gina questioned in disbelief and Kate's hand paused over the soggy pair of jeans she was folding. "You haven't even been there the two full days and you're supposed to be a professional."

"My personal feelings have no dictation in this-"

"Bullshit!" the other woman spat and Kate swore she heard something break before there was a brief stretch of quiet. "You know what, fine. It's not a problem," she said at last, too calm for someone who had just been on a verbal tirade, and Kate hastened her packing process. "Your company was never my only option. I'll find someone else, and be assured, the next person I hire will get the job done."

Gina hung up and Kate bit her lip, pressed the second of her three contacts on the burner phone without a moment of hesitation and waited.

"McCord speaking."

"Rachel," she breathed in relief as soon as the call connected.

"What's the matter, Beckett?" McCord questioned without preamble, alert and ready to have her back should she need assistance.

Kate sat back on her heels, scrubbed a hand across her eyes. "I'm going to need a safe house."

"What the hell happened?"

"The client backed out," Kate informed her, zipping her duffel closed and scraping her hair from the puddle it had created along her shoulder. "She's going to look for better services and that means Mr. Castle's life could be in real danger."

Rachel was quiet on the other line and then she sighed. Kate could picture her partner pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger in frustration.

"You're going to need to get back to New York, both of you. It's the only place I have an availability."

Going back towards the enemy rather than away. Not ideal, but better than remaining sitting ducks in LA.

"That's fine, I'll get us a flight out, pay with cash, and make sure Castle goes undetected," Beckett summarized, mentally cataloguing the to do list in her head as she paced the room. It shouldn't be too hard to escort him safely to a plane, but with her luck…

"Does he know yet?" McCord inquired and Kate paused, holding her breath for a moment too long. "You haven't told him?"

"I had planned to yesterday, but I never found the right time," she argued, but it was weak and she was sure her partner could read the flaws in her excuse.

She should have told him the truth that very first day, lured him away from the pool and up to the safety of her room. She should have told him the truth, but had selfishly succumbed to the thrill of being with him again, the thrill of feeling again, instead. She should have told him yesterday, at the park, explained her real reason for pursuing him while they'd meandered their way through the old zoo, but hadn't wanted to suck the joy from his eyes and now his life was at greater risk than ever.

She had taken advantage of his trust in her, of their past connection, and she had failed to do her own job, compromised the entire mission because of it.

What kind of an agent was she?

"You're not compromised, are you?" McCord asked, a hint of skepticism in the question that had Kate bristling. "With this assignment, with Mr. Castle?"

Kate grit her teeth. "I've never-"

"No, but there's a first time for everything," Rachel reasoned, growing quieter, likely so fellow agents in the office wouldn't catch on to the personal turn their conversation had taken. "It's happened before to plenty of others."

Kate chewed hard on her lower lip, weighed the decisions and repercussions in only a split second.

"Not to me. Don't worry, Rachel. I'm not compromised."