Bittersweet Disposition

E.C.

I married her four years after our reunion. Her and the kids and wild blossoms were all I wanted when we pledged to release the past and forge ahead to the future. That's exactly what I got.

I took her far away from New York, away from the pain and the memories, and back home to the peace and serenity that comes for us only in Washington State.

She found comfort in life, and strength in me.

We make our home in a cabin I built, and it was everything to us. Absolutely everything. Her life was turned one hundred and eighty degrees around, but it's perfect. I can't give her Louboutins and she doesn't want then. The reminders of the life she had aren't comparable to the life we lead together.

Needless to say, I didn't reenlist when my time was up. The fear of the far-stretching ghost of Jake was enough for me to be forbidden from any continued service to the country. It's also part of the reason we seclude ourselves enough to be known but rarely seen.

She's scared. I keep a stash of weapons under the floorboards and in the rafters. She feels safer knowing we can hole up and protect ourselves if the time comes. But I don't know why that time would ever need to come.

My Bella pretends she doesn't feel the panic, but I see it in her jittery movements and jerking eyes. And I calm her as best I can. I quiet my love with the soft sound of my voice in her ears.

Jake has been dead three-and-a-half years, but I he haunts her still - this man who tortured her. She tortured me those years we were apart, but now I have everything I want. She's my heart and soul and the very blood coursing through my veins. My heart beats for her and the kids, and that baby growing in her womb right now. I get to be here and watch her body grow with our child.

I place a vinyl on the turntable - Mazzy Star, and Fade Into You begins. She whimpers a little as I slip into bed behind her, and the fireplace keeps us warm on this cool spring night. My hands smooth her long waves, and I kiss a trail of fire down her body - mountains and valleys of her beauty soften under my lips. This woman holds my every breath in her own lungs, and I cannot breathe until she does.

A breath is passed from her lips when my mouth touches her; another when I come up for the air she permits me. I enter her with a stifled cry of my own, my perfect match is this woman. We were made to fit together this way, and meant to be one until the end of eternity.

She's most beautiful when her body surrenders its passion and bliss to me. So beautiful it tears at the chords in my body, beats at the drum of my heart. She pulls everything from me; allows nothing to be held back. I couldn't if I tried.

But there's a sliver she's held back, and though I may never know the fullness of the truth, I fill that missing piece up with more of me.

xxxxxxx

A/N:

Thank you all for the fantastic reviews. Your theories are AWESOME to read.

A couple of chapters left. Yes, we'll find out the whole truth. Wait for it...