A new chapter early in the morning before I head in to work! Enjoy and Expres

March 26, 2013

Randy immediately regretted getting on that elevator with her the moment he looked into her sad green eyes. It was like looking at a stranger.

She was drunk, which seemed to be the her usually state outside of work, but underneath it all, she looked like she still wasn't sleeping. The dark shadows under her eyes betrayed her and she looked noticeably thinner.

He was content with pretending she wasn't there. To just ignore her presence completely. He was not obligated to speak if he did not want to.

Until she spoke

"Please say something." she said, breaking his thoughts. It was almost so low, he thought he'd imagined it

He could only stare, his mouth going dry as a bone. She looked like a completely different person than the one he'd yelled at only a a few short weeks ago. What a drastic change just those weeks had make.

"What is there to say?" he finally asked flatly

"Anything. Yell at me. Scream if you have to. Just say something." she said, her eyes shining with unshed tears.

"Yelena-" he protested. Shit. This was not what he needed right now. His plans to ignore her had worked so flawlessly up until this moment. This was what he was trying to avoid and now he had no choice but to face her.

"No." she said sternly "Tell me what I have to do to make it right. I'll do anything." she sobbed, placing her hands on his chest, clutching at his shirt desperately. She was going to get through to him. If she had to get down on her knees and grovel, she would. She had, after all, done it before.

"I want to make it right. I can't stand the thought of you hating me. It makes me physically sick. What can I do to make you love me again?"

"I don't hate you." he admitted honestly. She had hurt him in the worst way and as much as it angered him, he couldn't hate her if he tried.

"I can see it in your eyes Randy. You hate me for what I did and I don't blame you. I hate myself for losing you."

He placed his hands on hers, trying to loosen her grip "Yelena don't do this." he begged weakly

She let out a sob, her tears making her mascara run down her face

His heart ached to comfort her. To kiss her and tell her it was okay, but he would be lying. It wasn't okay. She had hurt him badly, even if he wouldn't admit it out loud. He didn't want to give her mixed signal in her inebriated state. It would only make things worse on both of them.

"You were everything I ever wanted and more. You taught me how to love, but you didn't teach me how to turn it off." she told him tearfully

Randy touched his forehead to hers, cupping her face in between his hands "I love you to pieces Yelena, but you can't love someone until you learn to love yourself." he whispered, brushing away her tears with his thumbs.

The doors slid open to the lobby and he reluctantly released her and stepped off to save himself from the torment

"Please take care of yourself." he told her before the doors closed

Yelena let it all out. Her chest felt like it was going to cave in and she had to wrap her arms around herself to hold herself together. She couldn't do this. She could be alone tonight. If she had to be alone tonight, nothing good would come of it. She was tired of trying to put in a brave face. She was physically and emotionally drained. It was like she was trying to keep it together with tape and glue, but life was getting so heavy that tape and glue wasn't sealing the cracks anymore. She only found relief in bottles these days. With Randy hating her, her so called friends ostracizing her slowly but surely, and Rosa being gone, she never felt so alone. And people like her were not built to be alone.

And then she remembered.

She didn't have to be alone if she didn't want to. She had a choice. She'd always had a choice.

Pushing herself up from the floor, teetering slightly in her heels and pressed the button to the sixth floor. She was going to regret this, she knew it, but regret would have to wait until tomorrow.

He stepped off the elevator and stopped dead in his tracks.

Approaching his room with caution, he stopped in front of the woman who had turned his life upside down. Her head was bowed, her luscious brown hair concealing her face, her arms wrapped around her knees.

Her head snapped up when he was standing over her. She had been crying by the looks of the streaked mascara around her bloodshot red eyes.

She sniffled, her eyes filling with fresh tears as she looked at him, pleading

He didn't have to say a thing. The fact that she was here spoke volumes. Actions spoke louder than words and the look in her eyes told him all he needed to know. He slid his key in the door and opened it before silently offering his hand to her.

She looked at it, hesitantly, her green eyes shifting from his face to his hand and back before slowly placing her small hand in his, letting him help her up from the floor.

He brushed a a few stray hairs out of her face before pulling her into his room, shutting the door behind him

...

Their hands were all over each other, frantically trying to tear and claw off ever stitch of clothing. When they fell into bed and became one for the first time in months, she didn't feel numb anymore. Sure, Randy had been a new experience but Chris's body was familiar to her and she felt a sense of security. She remembered how she use to crave his touch and wondered how she went so long without it. It was like they never missed a beat, their bodies falling into perfect harmony. Everything that she asked for, he gave, whether it be a soft caress or a rather hard grip and she matched his technique skillfully.

When it was all over, and the moment of ecstasy and pleasure had ended, she rolled onto her side, her back to him and wept. Not because she was sorry, but because for the first time in the horrible weeks she'd been through, she held no regrets.

He knew right away that she was crying by the was her shoulders shook . He didn't press the situation. He had expected this. He knew that her range of emotions would be all over the place and that she would be confused, so he did the only thing he could: he comforted her. Spooning his body around hers, he held her, stroking her arm occasionally to let her know that he was here for her.

And he wasn't going anywhere.

*Hides behind chair* I know you guys probably hate me right now! Lol. Give me your worst and drop me a review!